Their Inevitable Someday
by AExupery
Summary: Barry, Caitlin and the story of how they met in another universe. They met once when they're eleven. The undeniable attraction they had then lead them back to each other a few years later. But by some cruel twist of fate, he was erased from her memories. Yet he's still waiting, hoping for their inevitable someday.
1. Chapter 1

"Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today..."

Everything fades into silence as she looks up at him. His eyes were beautiful but nothing in comparison to that of him, the sincerest emerald ones that she would never forget. He was the love of her life after all, still is, as she promised herself for as long as they both shall live. Funny how she managed to make that vow when she was here, standing in front of another man that will soon be her other half.

She told herself that she wouldn't cry because she shouldn't. It was her decision after all so she needed to be brave and suck it up. But how can she when her heart felt like it was being torn to pieces now that he wasn't here with her? Then she reminded herself why she was doing this in the first place. She closed her eyes and remembered him.

* * *

They were eleven when they first met. He was being picked on by bullies, an unwelcome routine that always had him go home with a bruise or a black eye and when he sometimes got lucky, both (that's probably why his dad had branded him with a nickname). She was having her casual stroll on the same playground, the one that her high-profiled parents would not happily approve of but with her persistence and a promise to not stray away from her bodyguards had them convinced to let her go even just for a little while. She was about to get her foil-wrapped popsicle when she noticed him, outnumbered but he managed, although barely. She rushed into his aid, her popsicle nearly forgotten when she threatened the bullies to leave him alone. She did nothing but a simple gesture to her bodyguards, letting them know what they would be facing if they would not disappear the moment she finished counting to five. He looked at her with wide eyes and a glimmer of amusement in his tone when he asked her why she did what she had just done. She just shrugged and told him that she just couldn't stand the idea of people taking advantage of others just because they want to or felt the need to. He was speechless for a while until she offered him her popsicle. He declined and told her that he was not a fan of sweets (or that he was just shy because he thinks he'd be taking too much from her if he were to accept the popsicle) and that he should probably just head home. She replied with a giggle and told him that it's okay and that she offered the popsicle for him to put on the already forming bruise on his cheek to somehow ease the pain. That's when he caved in, not because of her silly explanation but because of the way she's beaming at him and he knew he'd hate himself if he were to wipe that gleeful expression off of her angelic face. She carefully placed the frozen treat on his left cheek all the while examining the other cuts and bruises that had found a place on his face, a crease forming between her brows. He then decided that the worried look she wore suited her, it kinda made her look cute. He found himself staring, the cold sensation on his cheek was the only thing that kept him grounded.

"I'm Cait. What's your name?" When he didn't respond she tried again. And again. Until she finally brought him back to his senses by calling him a way-too-familiar nickname.

"Hey, slugger!"

"Huh?! Wait, how did you know my-"

"No, no, no, no. Please don't say that it's your name. Because that'd be so-"

"No! It's not my _name_ but it's what my dad calls me."

"Let me guess. It's because of this." She said while gesturing to the bruises on his face. "I didn't know getting into trouble was one of your hobbies." And she was giggling again and he decided that he couldn't get tired of hearing her laugh. It's like becoming music to his ears.

"Yeah." He sheepishly responded trying not to show the blush that's slowly creeping up his face.

"Well, I better go. I'd be dead if I don't get home soon. See you around, slugger!" She said while handing him back the now melting popsicle.

"Yeah. See you around, Cait." He dearly held the popsicle in his hand while watching her jog to the car waiting for her across the park. Then he decided to go after her and called out, "Hey, Cait! It's Barry, Barry Allen and I really hope to see you again soon." A small wave and a blinding smile was all her response before getting inside the lavish car of hers.

And no, he did not see her again soon after that though he kept on going back to the playground. The only reminder of their fateful encounter that day was the popsicle wrapper that he kept with him, meticulously placed between the pages of his favourite childhood book.

Years have passed and he was forced to grow up although not completely forgetting the pieces of his childhood (especially that one fateful day when he had met her). He still believed that they would still meet again, hopefully she has not forgotten him the way he was sure he had not. Because how can he? Even if wanted to he just can't. Yes, there were times that he wouldn't want to remember because he keeps telling himself that it was just a childhood crush, nothing more, nothing less. And it was silly of him to dwell on it too much because someday he would have to grow up and let go of the petty things that would not matter just as much as it did. He would have to pave way for the things that are yet to come, the things that would really matter. And who knows? Maybe he'll find someone like her, someone that is not a mere memory of the past, someone whom he can move forward with. It's what he always tell himself, what he always want to make himself believe but when the night comes and the ungodly hour was too cruel for him, he can't help but think about her and pray to the high heavens for yet another fateful encounter with her.

And maybe he has prayed hard enough in those years because little did he know that the heavens are yet to grant his wish.

* * *

It was his second year in high school when his wish had come true. Their adviser introduced a transfer student who he would recognize in a heartbeat. The same brown curls that graces every movement she makes and her big hazelnut eyes that were oh so expressive as they had remembered them were suddenly materializing in front of him. It was so surreal that he was left staring (yet again) at her with unbelieving eyes and quite embarrassingly gaping mouth. He was too oblivious to his surroundings that he didn't notice her taking the seat right next to him. It seemed that she recognized him too (because she also longed for this to happen just as badly as he did though she would not admit it out loud) and just like déjà vu she called him by his nickname to bring him back to his senses yet again.

"Slugger? Is it really you?" The amusement in her tone and a beaming smile she had was something she couldn't hide from showing in her features.

"Yeah. It really is me." His smile is cheeky and he tries hard not to show his overwhelming excitement by teasing her back with a, "Though I could clearly remember that I told you what my name was that day."

"I do remember. It's just that 'slugger' is a cute nickname. Suits you." She replies with that wicked grin of hers.

"So you're telling me I'm cute? I've gotta say, it's very straightforward coming from you. It would seem that you're so eager to make the moves on me, don't you think? It's just the start of the school year after all." Where he got the confidence to say that, he didn't really know. And it's kind of unnerving what her reaction might be but when she bursts into a peal of giggles, his worries were quickly flushed down the drain.

"You're funny. Don't worry I won't make my 'moves' on you. Like I would want to be involved with your hobby of getting into trouble, _slugger._ My parents would literally kill me if that happens."

"Hey, hey, that was ages ago. Couldn't a decent young man like me change?" She smiled at his use of the word decent.

"Yeah, maybe you can." Then she inched closer to his ear and whispered, "Though I like you better bruised and battered. Makes you look more manly." At that she winked at him and turned her focus to the lecture that was supposed to be the center of their attention with a grin still plastered on her face.

He was a loss for words and all he could think of was how mesmerizing her wink was even though he knows she was just messing with him. He's afraid he'd melt if she does that again. It took a while before he composed himself and a little more to focus his attention to the lecture rather than the brunette sitting gorgeously beside him.

When the last bell rang, he walked up to her and asked if he can walk her home. She asked him why and he just shrugged and replied with a, "Nothing. Just thinking if we could do some catching up, you know." When she just stared at him, he continued explaining. "I mean, it's what friends do right? When they haven't seen each other in a long time? I know it was just one time at the playground and it's probably nothing to you but-"

"Barry."

"-to me it's something you know. I really felt we had a connection back then and I thought we can be good friends if given the chance and I just couldn't explain why I can't stop thinking about you-"

"Barry!"

"Wha-yeah?"

"Yes."

"Yes what?"

"Yes, you can walk me home."

"Oh yeah right. Shall we?"

"Let's go. But can we take the other exit?"

"Uhm yeah sure."

She told him the directions to her house and that it was a solid 30-minute walk from school much to his surprise. When he started apologizing and insisting that they should at least take a cab, she just laughed at him and told him that she thought they were going to catch up (all the while emphasizing the words using air quotes) as friends. So instead of wasting their time together arguing whether to continue walking or not, he just decided to make the most out of it by getting to know each other better.

"So, no bodyguards today huh? And fancy car?" He asked, remembering the day he last saw her.

"Hmm. Actually, we sort of skipped past them." She said casually.

"We did what?" He looked at her with wide unbelieving eyes.

"Don't look at me like that. It's not like we've committed a crime."

"Wait. Are you seriously telling me that there was an _actual_ bodyguard in an _actual_ car waiting for you to come home from school?"

"Yeah sort of."

"And you didn't even inform them that you're actually on your way home? And now I'm guessing they're literally having a search party for you back there and they'll know that you're with me which will eventually get me into trouble and haven't I told you that I'm a changed man? That I'm more decent now and-" Before he can finish off with his nervous rambling, Caitlin put her index finger on his lips to silence him.

"Okay Barry, if you don't stop talking right now I'll be the one to make sure that you'd be in so much trouble." He raised his two hands up in defense, her intense glare seemed to be passing right through him. Seeing him like that, so adorably defenseless under her stare, made her turn into a fit of giggles. Giggles that quickly turned into full blown laughter as his face turned from that of an utterly frightened into a straight face frown when he realized that she was just messing with him.

"I so hate you right now. And I'm starting to think that being friends with you wasn't a good idea after all." He acted hurt and betrayed while crossing his arms over his chest in a very child-like manner.

"Oh do you now?" She quirked an eyebrow towards him.

"Yeah. And I think you'd be nothing but trouble for a _decent_ young man like me." And he had this adorable pout plastered on his face and she couldn't do anything but laugh at his antics.

"Well, I'm so sorry to hear that. But just so you know, I already informed them of my departure, see? So you'll have nothing to worry about." She reached her phone out to him to let him see the text she just sent.

"Okay that's good. I didn't know you were such a badass, Ms. Snow." He winked at her wearing his proud smile.

"You have no idea, Mr. Allen." She smiled back at him.

"But you still owe me a proper apology." When she raised her eyebrow at him he continued. "For making fun of me and hurting my feelings." He dramatically said while pointing at his heart. She just rolled her eyes at him and said, "Okay, fine. I'm sorry Barry, will you forgive me?"

"Nope. Not like that. Not when you're about to laugh again."

"Fine. What do you want me to do?"

"Let me walk you home again tomorrow? But this time with the consent of your bodyguards or whoever is responsible." He had a hopeful smile on his face and it only widened when she agreed.

It had become their usual routine from then on, a strong bond of friendship was built with each passing day. And maybe, just maybe, it's something more than that.

* * *

It has been over a year of dancing around each other when he finally decided to confess his feelings for her. He thought that maybe asking her to be his date for prom and telling her his feelings on the same night would be cliché but he couldn't think of a better timing than that. So with a lot of fidgeting and nervous babbling together with her noticing how extremely weird he was acting that night (well, weirder than he normally is) he decided that it was now or never.

"Cait, there's something I want to tell you." He whispered into her ear while they closely held each other, swaying into the rhythm of the song.

"Yeah? There's something I need to tell you, too." She pulled her face away from his shoulder slowly so that she's meeting his gaze. Seeing the sparkle in her eyes with her words, he urged her to talk first.

"Since you look so excited to tell me, why don't you go first?" He said, giving her an encouraging smile.

"Okay, here goes. You remember the research paper that I've been working on? The one about cell mutation and stuff?"

"Yeah, the one that had you drowning in caffeine at night and turning you into a grumpy human being at day."

"Why, thank you for that very detailed description Mr. Allen." Her tone laced with much sarcasm as she can muster. "But that said paper has been highly recommended for consultation in a certain prestigious university. Now I want you to guess what university is that?"

He gave an exasperated sigh knowing full well what she's talking about but seeing her so excited and happy like this made him want to give in into her whims. "Hm, maybe it's the one that you've been eyeing since we reached our junior year?"

"Yes! The one and the same. Can you believe it? But that's not the best part." He swore that by this moment her smile had reached her ears literally, not that he minded though.

"Okay, what's the best part?" He asked, making her light up like a kid waiting to open her Christmas presents.

"Our research adviser talked to me the other day and he told me that if I decided to continue working on the paper until we graduate, I'll have a huge chance of getting a good recommendation for that university and if they were impressed with the outcome of the research, they might consider giving me a scholarship. Isn't that great?"

"Yeah, that's great." His voice didn't sound as cheerful as he had hoped. Of course he was happy for her but for the first time he felt like they weren't on the same page anymore. He wasn't the same young boy from before (whose hobby was getting into trouble according to her) and she wasn't either. A lot has changed in the past few years but still here he was, too absorbed in that memory, hoping that maybe the girl she met that one fateful day in the playground (whom he'd been crushing on ever since) would feel the same way about him too. It was silly of him to make love his priority in life when he can barely afford to go to school. He was too caught up with the idea that it was destiny that brought them back together and he'd be damned if he will ever let her go. Sensing that something is wrong with him she asked, "Barry, are you alright?"

"Yeah I'm fine. It's just that I'm really happy for you. But I seriously think that you won't be needing a scholarship, you're pretty well-off to begin with you know." He teased her to lighten the mood which she replied with a playful smack on the shoulder.

"You know I don't like it when you joke about that. Besides, I'm not wealthy, my parents are."

"Whatever you say, Cait. So going back with this research thingy, does it mean that you would be a slave to caffeine for one more year? My, I don't even want to imagine what kind of monster you will turn into everyday."

"You just had to remind me of that don't you? Now I'm starting to doubt if this is good after all. I wouldn't have a life anymore and I sure can't have any distractions along the way." She let out a heavy sigh and the cheerful expression she had moments ago is slowly disappearing.

"Yeah, that may be true. But Cait, you don't even have a life to begin with you know. So that's one thing you don't have to worry about."

"Hey, I do have a life. I study, I cook, I eat, I hang out with you and lots of other stuff."

"You just spelled out to me that you clearly don't have a life. Well, except for the part where you hang out with me because that's totally awesome." He said with that confident smile of his.

"Yeah right." She replied, giving him her famous eye roll. "Speaking of which, what were you gonna say to me?"

Deciding that maybe this isn't the perfect timing for confessing his feelings after all (which was clearly the opposite of what he was thinking a few moments ago) he just thought of saying the first thing that came into his mind. "It's nothing, really. I just wanted to remind you about..."

"About what?"

"About...the..the upcoming track and field competition next week. You're going to be there, right?"

"Of course, I'll be there. Didn't want to miss seeing you trip over your own feet now, do we?" She teased.

"Yeah right. Like that ever happened. So you'd be cheering for me then?" He asked with a hopeful smile.

"Being there is one thing but cheering for you? We'll that's another." She replied with a smirk.

"Aww. Come on, Caity. It would really mean a lot to me you know."

"Yeah? And why is that?"

 _'Because you really mean a lot to me and you being there would be my source of inspiration.'_ That's what he wanted to say but deciding against it he just shrugged and said, "Because it's the last one for this school year so it's really important for me. And I couldn't give my best if I don't see my personal mascot cheering for me up there, right beside the stairs in the third row, like she always did in each of my competitions. Wouldn't want to risk losing my scholarship for the last year, right?" He said trying his best to convince her with his puppy-dog eyes.

"Okay fine. But I'm only doing this for your scholarship. And for the record I'm so not your personal mascot."

"Oh but you are, Ms. Snow." His smile was too sincere she couldn't do anything but groan in acceptance.

"You're the best there is." He added which only made her tingly on the inside.

"I know." She smiled at him then buried her face on his neck trying to hide her crimson cheeks.

As they spent the night away dancing and talking about everything and nothing, he decided that this is where he wanted to be. He somehow knew, even before, that he's already hers, irretrievably under her spell. Although he believed that this wasn't the right time for them, he still hopes (and was so sure of it) that someday they'll find their way to be together. But for now, he'll just admire her from a distance, sneaking love letters into her locker while waiting for their inevitable someday.

* * *

It was the middle of their senior year and everything went as smoothly as he had hoped. Between sneaking his handwritten love letters and trying his best not to get caught by her together with him teasing her about this "secret admirer" of hers (which was totally him by the way and he only did the teasing part just so he knows what she thinks about his letters), everything seemed pretty much the same until one day when he encountered a problem in a form of a "he".

The last bell has just rung and he was waiting for her at the end of the hall, knowing that she's already done putting her things away in her locker as she usually did.

"So did your secret admirer left another one of his poetic love letters today? Or did he finally realize that your eyes were only set on-what did you call it the other day? Oh right, your baby, your baby _thesis_." He seemed confident on the outside but on the inside, he's dying to know what she thought of his latest masterpiece.

"Actually he did send me one today. It's pretty long but I think it's nice."

"Just _nice_? That's the best you can do? You could've said it was beautiful it almost made you cry."

"What's wrong with that? Nice is a good word to describe it. Why were you so nosy about what I think of his letters by the way? If I hadn't known better I would've thought it was from you." She said while narrowing her eyes at him.

"What?! Why would I even do that?" He quickly replied trying to play it cool. "Unlike him, I already accepted the fact that you were pretty smitten with your research paper and that your focus is with your future career and you clearly don't have time for love-"

"Okay, I get it. You don't need to be that defensive you know."

"I am not. I just thought that maybe you could've given him more credit with all his effort and stuff."

"I would've given him more if I hadn't set my eyes on somebody else." She replied with a playful wink.

"Do my ears deceive me or did you just say that you were eyeing someone else? My, my, who would've thought that the great Caitlin Snow would be into something as petty as love." By this time, he's practically screaming with excitement inside (though he tries his best not to show it) and the determination he had on the night of their prom is slowly coming back.

"For your information Barry Allen, I may be into everything that is geeky and nerdy most of the time but it doesn't mean that I don't do romance you know."

"Yeah? If that's so, can you tell me about this guy you've been crushing on?" He couldn't help the curiosity welling up inside him, silently praying that maybe, just maybe, it's his name that would tumble out of her mouth.

"Well, he's someone I've known-"

"Caitlin!" A dark-haired man leaning on his black Bentley called out to her as they were walking towards the school's exit.

"Ronnie? What are you doing here?" She said, slightly taken aback by his presence.

"I was wondering if I can drive you home. Your father told me that you refused to be escorted by your bodyguards and I don't think it's safe for you to go home alone."

"She's not alone alright." Barry who was just as surprised as Caitlin was (if not, maybe even a little more) decided that he couldn't take this anymore. Who is this guy by the way? He doesn't like the way he acts like he knew Cait better than he did.

"I didn't notice you're with someone, Caitlin." Ronnie told her while examining Barry from head to toe.

"Right, how silly of me. Ronnie this is Barry, he's a friend and Barry this is Ronnie, he's the son of my dad's business partner."

"It's nice to meet you Barry." Ronnie said extending his hand for Barry to shake.

"Yeah, you too." Barry replied returning the gesture. "But if you'll excuse us, Cait and I are going. Right, Cait?" He said grabbing Caitlin by the arm.

"Uhm-"

"Not so fast. Mr. Snow has entrusted me to take Caitlin home. So it's only wise that I'll be the one to drive her home. Trust me when I say that you wouldn't want to be in the receiving end of his wrath." Ronnie said taking hold of Caitlin's other arm.

"Aww, don't tell me you're afraid of a little scolding. I bet Cait's gonna be the one to protect you when the bad guys come." Barry teased earning a glare from Caitlin which he just shrugged with a seemingly innocent, "What?"

"Ronnie, can you excuse us for a second? I'm just gonna talk to Barry here." She smiled at him then dragged Barry to a safe distance.

"Okay, what's that about?" She asked waiting for a reasonable explanation from him.

"What? Nothing, I'm just trying to be friendly that's all." He sheepishly replied.

"We both know that's far from being friendly. Come on, spill it." She said giving him an all too familiar glare.

He groaned in response. Sometimes he doesn't like the fact that she knows him all too well.

"Fine. I don't like him, okay? Who does he think he is, barging in here and acting like he knows you better than I do."

"Barry he's just being nice. Besides, it's my dad who told him to come and take me home. It's not like he wanted to in the first place."

"Yeah like I would believe that." He mumbled to himself.

"What was that?"

"Nothing. I just said that your father can really be intimidating when he wants to."

"Yeah. I remember that one time you met him, you almost peed your pants." She laughed at the memory.

"I did not. I just don't think he likes me that much or anything for that matter. Plus, he's a total control freak."

"I know. Just imagine putting yourself in my shoes. Come on, you still have some apologizing to do." She said and was about to drag Barry back to Ronnie when he halted to a stop and asked, "What? Why would I even do that?"

"You were rude to him Barry and you know it."

"Haven't you seen the way he looked at me from head to toe? If that wasn't rude then I don't know what is."

"Barry, please, can you just-"

"No. I couldn't believe you're taking his side, Cait."

"I'm not taking anyone's side here, okay? I'm just asking you, for once, to humble yourself down and apologize so we can get this over with and go our separate ways in peace."

"You're actually letting him take you home, Cait?" He almost screamed at her with utmost disbelief.

"I have to, okay? I thought we've established the fact that my dad isn't a fan of disobedience. And do you think letting down his partner's son would please him?"

"Right. Use the dad card for all I care. You know what? You should've just told me that you like his company better than mine. Or better, you should've just said that he's the guy you've been crushing on instead of using your dad as an excuse again. To be honest, I'm getting pretty sick of that one." He knew all too well that he'll be regretting all these words that had just come out of his mouth. But when his emotions run high and all rationality has left him for good, he just couldn't stop pouring his feelings out.

"Where the hell did that come from Barry?! He was just driving me home, nothing more, nothing less." Now she's the one who's screaming at him. How it came down to this, she didn't even know. All she's certain of is that something's going on with Barry and whatever it was, it felt like it's been bottled up for quite sometime now.

"You know what, Cait? You're right. I'm sorry. It was stupid of me to think that maybe we had something going on here. I thought going home together was our thing. But the fact that you can easily replace me by someone else is a clear sign that you don't think the same way." He doesn't want to sound this childish but he couldn't prevent the strong sense of jealousy from talking.

"Barry, it's not like that-"

He held his palm up to her, letting her know that he wasn't quite finished yet.

"No, Caitlin. I get it. I'm sorry for being so caught up with the idea that we have this...thing, this special connection from way before we first met. I guess, deep down, I'm still that boy, the boy who would go to that playground everyday just to see if you had come back. The boy who would not let a day go by without thinking of you all those years ago. Then I saw you again and I can't help but believe that maybe we were meant to be together. But now I guess, I'm living in a fantasy, huh?"

"Barry..." She was a lost for words. Everything happened way too fast and it's just too much for her to take in.

"It's okay. You don't need to say anything. It's just a stupid childhood crush anyway." He gave her a sad smile and with one final look at her, he turned around and walked away. Maybe it's time for him to grow up, for real this time.

* * *

It's been weeks since her last conversation with Barry but the weight of his words still lingered like it was just yesterday. Could it possibly be true that he had developed feelings for her? Would it be crazy for her to assume that he's the one giving her those love letters? It would, only if her secret admirer hadn't stop giving her those letters the same time Barry had decided to give her the silent treatment. Even if he didn't talk to her after that, she decided she would give him time. There was a certain awkwardness floating around them whenever they were forced to be in the same room together and it didn't help that they were almost always seatmates. It's a good thing that semestral break had come and gone, it helped her sort out her feelings and thoughts for a while.

After days of debating whether she had given him much time or not, she decided to talk to him and get this over with once and for all. The cold shoulder he'd been giving her is just too much to bear (and the fact that she misses him didn't help either). So when she spotted him alone in their usual spot (or what used to be), she quickly approached him.

"Hey, Barry." She watched him tense up with her sudden approach.

"Hey, Caitlin. I was just leaving. You can stay here if you want-"

"No, Barry. I'm sorry but I can't let you leave. We need to talk."

"If this is about school stuff then-"

"It wasn't about that. I know you've been giving me the cold shoulder for weeks now and I tried to understand you by giving you some time but don't you think it's about time we settle this?"

"There's nothing to settle. We're fine where we are now Caitlin."

"Fine? You can't even look me in the eye, Barry. Can we just please talk about this?" Her eyes pleaded with him and she could only see the war going on inside him.

"What do you want me to say Caitlin? I thought I've said enough before and you seemed fine to not say anything in response back then." He spatted, making her wince as if she was physically hurt.

"I know and I'm so sorry for that Barry. It's just that it happened so fast and it's a lot to take in all at once. I've been thinking about it since then and I realized that you were wrong."

"You came all the way here just to tell me I'm wrong? You're really good at hurting my feelings, Cait."

"Just hear me out, okay? You're wrong when you said that it was just a childhood crush. Because if it was, then why couldn't I get you out of my head since then? Why would I never miss a single day without thinking about you just like you did? Why, after many years, I still hope to see you again? You didn't know what it felt like when I saw you again, I couldn't understand it either. All I know is that I'm happy. But with everything that's happening I know we weren't the same kids we were back then. We've changed and although we somehow found a place next to each other, I'm still in disbelief of how it really came to this. It's just too good to be true. You're too good to be true, Barry. Being with you is what completes me and it sometimes scary to think that maybe someday you wouldn't be there anymore. I'll be left broken and I-" She didn't realize he has closed the space between them, wiping away the tears that have escaped from her eyes.

"Shh, it's okay Cait. I'm right here. I'm sorry I haven't found the courage to tell you this sooner." He said as he held her in his arms, one hand cupping her cheek.

"I am hopelessly in love with you, Caitlin Snow." He said with as much sincerity as he can muster.

"I love you too, Barry Allen, with all my heart." She said drawing her face close to him inhaling his scent.

This was the moment they've been waiting for. So to make it more special, he leaned down to her capturing her lips with his for the first time.

* * *

 **END OF PART ONE**


	2. Chapter 2

It's been two wonderful years since Barry and Caitlin became a couple. Caitlin, who graduated as class valedictorian, has been accepted to the university she's been dreaming of (as Barry bet she would). While Barry, being recognized as the Athlete of the Year, has been offered a lot of scholarship opportunities from different universities (and yes, he went to the one closest to Caitlin's, no questions asked). Although they had their fair share of ups and downs, specifically the one where they still had to keep their relationship a secret (simply because Caitlin's control freak of a father doesn't approve of someone who, by his own words, "is below their level and is clearly nothing but trouble" to be his daughter's boyfriend), they still managed to be together. They're Barry and Caitlin after all.

He's patiently waiting for his girlfriend at the gate when he spotted her talking to someone (someone who's too familiar for his liking). As soon as their eyes made contact, a blinding smile immediately spread across her face. The worry he had a few moments ago were forgotten as he watched her jog over to him and gave him a bone-crushing hug, peppering kisses along his jaw (damn he was one lucky bastard).

"Someone's in a good mood today, huh?" He said after kissing her back.

"I don't know. Maybe it's because I have a date with this handsome guy." She leaned closer to his ear and whispered, "It's our second anniversary after all." She finished with a playful wink.

"Really? I didn't know anyone can put up with you that long. Two years? Man, that's painful."

She replied with a giggle, lightly hitting him on the arm and said, "Oh he puts up with me alright. He couldn't even stand the idea of being away from me for even just an hour. What a sappy romantic he is."

As she said that, he tightened his hold on her waist, drawing her close before replying, "I'm your sappy romantic. Even a minute's too long for me you know."

"Yeah?"

"Totally." He's about to kiss her again when they heard someone clear his throat from behind them. She immediately untangled herself from him but didn't let go of his hand. She blushing furiously when she said, "Bar, you remember Ronnie?"

"Yeah. How could I not? Nice to see you again, Ronnie." It was his turn to extend his hand for Ronnie to shake, now in a friendlier manner (or maybe not).

"Good to see you too Barry. I didn't know you and Cait are still seeing each other." He replied while shaking Barry's hand.

"We totally do. But can you do us a favour and not tell anyone? Especially Cait's parents if that's okay." He said mocking him.

"Your parents don't know about this Cait?" Ronnie asked, turning to Caitlin.

"Ronnie, I can explain."

"It's okay Caitlin. You don't need to. I'm sure you have a good reason for this. I better go." He said as he started to walk away.

"Ronnie, wait!" Caitlin called out after him. He stopped on his tracks and looked at her. "Thank you. It means a lot."

"Anything for you, Cait." He smiled at her. "Take good care of her, okay Barry?"

"I will. Thanks." Ronnie nodded in reply and went on his way.

* * *

They made their way to Caitlin's car and headed to Barry's rundown apartment. It's not much but it had a nice view from the building's rooftop where Barry had decided to take Caitlin for their anniversary. On their way, Barry told her something that's been eating him up since meeting Ronnie.

"I totally misjudged him, didn't I?" He said as the car slowed to a stop.

"Who?" Caitlin replied as she waited for the traffic lights to turn green.

"Ronnie. I thought he was a total jerk."

"But he wasn't."

"Yeah but I still don't like the fact that he's still making the moves on you. It's been two years, Cait. What's he even doing at your school?"

"He kind of transferred there."

"What?! Okay, I'm about to take back what I said about him earlier."

"Silly. It was his dad who wanted him to be there. It's not like he had much choice anyway."

"Right." He answered unbelievingly, nodding his head in a slow, mocking gesture.

"As much as I want to address your rude behaviour, I won't because we're already here. So care to tell me now why are we celebrating our anniversary here?" She's beaming at him now, animatedly excited to what he had in store for her.

"It's called a surprise for a reason, you know." He said, getting out of the car to her side and opened the door for her. They went upstairs to his apartment floor and instructed her to stay there for a while as he went to the rooftop to put up his finishing touches.

"Careful Cait, we're almost there." Barry said, guiding Caitlin up the stairs to the rooftop.

"Can I open my eyes now?" She asked excitedly. Barry loves seeing her like this, so carefree and far from her usual uptight self (all because of the stress from school and her parents if you ask her).

"Yep." He replied goofily.

She opened her eyes and she was a loss for words for what she saw. The rooftop was lit with nothing but lanterns hanging on strings surrounding the whole place. At the center was a small makeshift tent with a bunch of blankets at the bottom. There's a single platter of finger food lying on top of the table beside the tent.

"So…do you like it?" He nervously asked, running his hand at the back of his neck. When she just stood there in silence, he said, "I know this isn't as close to the real thing but do you see those lanterns? They're my version of fireflies, fireflies which have already been caught because you know, they can no longer move. And, and I really thought of making a bonfire here if it wasn't for the landowner threatening to kick me out and-"

"Barry." She held his face in her hands so that he would look at her and stop being a babbling mess. "I don't like it."

"Wha-why?"

"I love it, Barry. It's wonderful. How did you even-"

"I know how much you love camping to relieve stress but with everything going on now with your studies, your parents, you haven't had time for yourself. So if you can't go out for camping, I decided to just bring camping to you." He said, embracing her from behind.

"You don't know how much this means to me, Barry. Gosh, I'm so lucky to have you." She turned in his arms to give him a kiss on the cheek.

"I'm the lucky one, Cait. Now, shall we?"

They walked to the tent and ate the food Barry had prepared. When they were done, Caitlin decided to give Barry her gift.

"What's inside?"

"Just open it."

He quickly unwrapped the gift and inside was a silver watch with a snowflake engraved at the back of it. "Wow, this is amazing Cait. Thank you. I just wonder what's the snowflake for." He gave her a teasing smile which she replied with a heartfelt laughter.

"Okay, my turn." He handed her a necklace with a lightning bolt as a pendant.

"Barry this is just beautiful. But I have to ask, why a lightning bolt? My snowflake is pretty obvious but I don't know what this stands for."

"You remember when you would always tease me after winning my competitions?"

"Yes. I would tell you that you're the fastest man alive."

"So does that answer your question?"

"Yeah, I guess."

"But wait I still have one more in store for you." He stood up and went to get the guitar he borrowed earlier.

"What's this? Don't tell me you're gonna sing." She asked him, amused. She's oblivious to the fact that he can actually play the guitar or even sing.

"Camping isn't complete without singing songs, right?" She raised an eyebrow at him. "Don't worry, I'm not gonna sing any crappy campfire song. I'm actually going to serenade you, Miss Snow." He said with a wink.

"Oh, do you now? This better be good, Mr. Allen." She teased him right back though she was practically screaming like a fangirl inside (not that she would admit it though).

"Okay, here goes." He started strumming the guitar like he was a pro with it, all the while keeping his eyes on her. She decided she can literally melt any moment now but not until she heard his voice that she actually fell in love with him all over again.

' _It's her hair and her eyes today_

 _That just simply take me away_

 _And the feeling that I'm falling further in love makes me shiver_

 _But in a good way'_

' _Cause I love her with all that I am_

 _And my voice shakes along with my hands_

 _Cause she's all that I see and she's all that I need_

 _And I'm out of my league once again'_

 _(Out of My League by Stephen Speaks)_

* * *

It's almost the end of their junior year and Caitlin was waiting for Barry to change his clothes after winning his last competition of the year. She insisted on coming to watch him run even though she had exams tomorrow because it has become a tradition for the two of them. Barry made his way to her and hugged her, twirling her around.

"Barry, put me down!" She said in between giggles. As soon as her feet touched the ground, he kissed her sweetly on the lips. "Thank you for still coming to support me tonight, babe. It means a lot."

"That's the role I had to take when I became your personal mascot, right?" She smiled at him.

"Yeah and you're still the best there is."

"Okay, enough with your sweet talk. Come on we need to celebrate."

"Wait, how about your exams?"

"I've got it, trust me."

"Well, if you say so. I wouldn't want to argue with someone as genius as you."

"I hope you'd remember that in the years to come." There's a hint of conviction in her smile that made him think of her, wanting to have the same future with him. And the idea itself is so thrilling to bear.

Soon, they arrived at the place where Caitlin decided to celebrate, in a karaoke bar. Knowing her, this is the last place that Barry would think Caitlin would want to go but boy was he wrong. It surprised him that there were still things that they don't know about each other even though they always spend their time together.

"Woah Cait, I didn't know you were into this kind of stuff." He said as he followed her inside the bar.

"I'm not. It's just my second time here. I just thought it's a good place to celebrate." She said, settling down on the table she has chosen.

"Yeah, I think so. But remind me to take you home early tonight okay? I don't want you to miss your exams tomorrow."

"And here I thought I was the uptight one."

"You still are, totally."

"Yeah? Watch me." She said trying to challenge him. He didn't even know what she meant by that until she said, "Excuse me, I would like to start a tab."

"Cait, what are you doing? Tell me you did not just start a tab." He looked at her in disbelief.

"I just did. Look, we came here to celebrate and that's what we're gonna do." She had this playful smile on her face that he knew all too well (it's the same one she had whenever she will come up with another research topic). "Please, baby?" Now it's her turn to give him her best puppy dog eyes and he knew he wasn't strong enough to deny that.

"I can't believe this." He was shaking his head but a smile is slowly creeping up his face.

Just a few drinks in and Caitlin was way beyond tipsy as she claimed to be so Barry decided to close their tab and take her home but not until he heard an all too familiar voice calling his name using the microphone. "Mr. Barry Allen! Come on down…or up? Come up here with me!" When he didn't budge, she started chanting his name, "Barry! Barry! Barry!" As soon as the crowd joined her he knew there's no way out of this but just to get this over with.

"We're going to bring this place down!"

"Okay, take it easy Cait." He said placing his hand on her waist to draw her closer.

' _Summer loving had me a blast_

 _Summer loving happened so fast_

 _I met a girl crazy for me_

 _Met a boy cute as can be'_

 _(Summer Nights by Grease)_

The car ride to Caitlin's condo wasn't as peaceful as Barry hoped it would be. Between worrying about his driving skills and keeping a close eye on his girlfriend, he hadn't had a second to breathe. So when they finally reached their destination, he let out a heavy sigh of relief.

"Okay Cait, let's get you out of the car and into your unit. Come on." Barry said as he almost dragged the stubborn Caitlin out of her car. They were on the elevator when Caitlin started to blabber again.

"Babe." She said then poked his chest.

"Yeah?"

"Babe." She poked again.

"Yes, Cait? I'm already listening you see." He didn't know a drunk Caitlin can be this childish. But he was enjoying seeing her like this. It's not everyday that the reasonable and uptight Caitlin Snow would end up this miserably drunk.

"Oh right. You know what I've just realized?" She had a big smile on her face like she had just discovered an underwater treasure.

"What?"

"That song we sung earlier? That's totally our song."

"Yeah? How so?"

"Remember the part- _I met a boy cute as can be~_ " Her singing was so adorably out of tune he couldn't help but laugh at her (he just hoped that she wouldn't remember though).

"What about it?" He asked after getting a hold of his laughter.

"I didn't tell you about this before but the moment I first met you, on that playground? I really thought you were cute." Although he knew that it was just a drunken confession, he couldn't help the blush creeping up his face.

"Yeah? How about now?" It was only on rare times like this that Caitlin would really compliment him without having to tease him about it so he decided that it wouldn't hurt to ask for a little more. She was about to answer when the elevator dinged, telling them that they had reached their floor.

"We're here!" She exclaimed.

"Keep your voice down, Cait. We don't want to disturb your neighbors." They were already at her door and Barry realized that it wasn't locked. "Did you forget to lock the door before you went out today, huh Cait?"

"Nope!" He opened the door for her and guided her to the living room, making sure she didn't stumble on any furniture.

"Are you sure? Then why was your-"

"You don't think it was inappropriate for you to take my daughter home at this ungodly hour in that drunken state, do you Mr. Allen?" An intimidating voice that came from a man sitting across the room captured Barry's attention. "Take Caitlin to her room. I'll talk to her in the morning." He gestured to the two guards standing by his side and before Caitlin could protest, she was already been brought to her room.

"Mr. Snow, I didn't know-"

"Of course you don't know. You see, there are a lot of things you're not aware of Mr. Allen. Let me start off with how you're nothing but a nuisance to my daughter especially to the bright future ahead of her." Barry winced upon hearing his words. As much as he wanted to respect him as his girlfriend's father, he's making it hard for him to do so.

"I hope you know she's the only child I have, the sole heir to everything I've worked hard for. And I'm not comfortable with the idea that maybe someday I'll have to entrust all of that to someone like you. But you knew that all along, don't you? That's why you decided to court my daughter in the first place."

"With all due respect sir, I'm with your daughter because I love her. She's the most amazing woman I know and I'd give up everything just to be with her. I know I don't have much but I can assure you sir that I will love her with everything I have, with everything I am."

"I can say, I'm amazed by your determination Mr. Allen. But I don't think it'll be enough to suffice the life I want my daughter to have. I know you're a smart guy so I'll just ask you once. Do my daughter a favor and leave her alone. We both know she's better off without you."

"I'm sorry sir but I couldn't do that. I don't think you know her enough to tell what's good for her or not. I'll fight for her until death if I have to." And with that, he started to leave. He's about to reach the door when he heard him say, "I would've considered you to stay as her friend if you just took my offer but you didn't. I'll make sure you'll regret this, Mr. Allen."

"It was nice meeting you too, Mr. Snow."

And true to his words, he did made him regret.

* * *

It's almost the end of summer vacation and Barry still hasn't heard about Caitlin since he had that conversation with her father. They were supposed to spend their last summer vacation together but now he didn't even know if he'll see her again. He kept on visiting her school and her condo in hopes that he'll see her but he would always go home defeated. He had called her a thousand times but the line's always dead. If it wasn't for his double shifts keeping him occupied, he would've lost his mind by now. He was starting to think that being friends would be so much better than this. At least, he gets to see her then.

One night, he heard a loud knock on his door, shaking him out of his thoughts.

"Just a minute!" He hurried to the door, forgetting to put on a shirt in the process. Who would be visiting him this late at night he thought. He opened the door and stood shocked by what he saw. There she was, tears streamed down her face, skin paler than usual but still as beautiful as he remembered.

"Barry!" She lunged at him, holding him as tight as possible.

"Caitlin. God I missed you so much. Where have you been? I've tried everything just to reach you-"

"I know. I'm sorry. My dad forced me to stay with them. He confiscated my phone, everything. They're sending me to Europe and finish my last school year there but I didn't want to so I just...I...ran away." She was crying hard now and Barry just held her tighter, running his hand up and down her back.

"Shh, Cait. It's alright. I've got you. We'll figure something out. But now you should get some rest, okay?"

"Yeah, okay."

* * *

It's been five months since Barry took Caitlin in. He knew it wasn't going to be easy and he would have to work harder than before to support the two of them but he couldn't deny the happiness welling up inside him knowing Caitlin will always be by his side from now on. It's a good thing that they still have their scholarships and it's only a matter of time before they graduate and look for a more suitable job.

"Dinner's ready!" She called from the kitchen where she had just put the plates on the table.

"I'll be there in a minute."

"Bar, come on. You should eat it while it's hot."

"Fine. If you insist." They already had a routine in the time they were together. Caitlin will cook and Barry will clean up afterwards. Seeing that something's not quite right with Caitlin, he decided to ask what's been bothering her.

"You okay, Cait?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. It's just that, dad called me this morning."

"What did he say?" He said with a worried expression on his face.

"He wants to see me tomorrow night. He said it was something important."

"So what are you planning to do?"

"I don't know. I'm still thinking about it. We both know how unreasonable he can be at times."

"Tell me about it. The last time I talked to him, he asked me to leave you alone. Who knows what he wants now. But whatever you decide to do, I promise I'll be here with you." He said, taking her hands in his.

"Thank you. But if he wants to settle our argument, I think I need to do that alone."

"Are you sure? Cait, it's your dad we're talking about here."

"Exactly, Barry. That's why I need to do this alone." Her eyes were pleading him but he wouldn't back down easily, the thought of losing her again eating him up.

"What if it's just a trap? What if he'll take you away from me again? I can't lose you, Cait. Not again."

"And I promise I won't leave you again. But I need to do this, okay? And I can only do that if you'll let me. Trust me on this one, please?" She could see the resolve in his eyes and she knew that she had won him over.

"Fine. But promise me one thing."

"Anything."

"Come back to me?"

"Always." She stood on her tiptoes and gave him a peck on the lips as a sign of her promise.

It's almost midnight and she hasn't come back yet from her meeting with her father. He's been pacing back and forth in is apartment contemplating whether he should go and get her but he made a promise to trust her on this and he intended on keeping that. A few minutes later he heard the familiar sound of the door opening and he quickly went to see if she has already come back.

"Cait! Thank goodness you're back." He said while hugging her as if she would disappear any moment. "What happened? Is everything okay? Are you okay?"

"Barry." She said holding back the tears that were threatening to spill.

"Babe, come on. Tell me what happened." His eyes were searching hers and it pained him seeing her like this.

"Barry I'm engaged." And all the tears she was trying so hard to stop from falling were like a waterfall free-flowing from her eyes.

"WHAT?! How did that happen? How are you engaged?" There's a lot of emotions coursing through him all at the same time but he needed to know everything right now.

"It's my dad. He wanted me to marry Ronnie. He told me he'd forget about all this if I agreed and would let me go home. But I told him no, I told him that I don't need his money as long as I have you but then he...he…" Barry held her tighter, trying to give her the comfort she needed. "I can't lose you Barry. But I don't want to see you get hurt, too. I don't think I can take it."

"It's okay, Cait. I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere. But I need to know if you're with me on this. Please, Cait?" He looked at her in the eyes, those eyes that he loved so much and he could see the war going on inside her. When she nodded at him, he let out sigh of relief and held her even close.

"I love you Caitlin. I love you too much to let you go. I hope you don't forget that."

"I won't. I love you too Barry. You're everything I need and more."

The next morning, Caitlin found herself alone in their bed. Panic started to well up inside her until she saw a paper lying on her nightstand with Barry's handwriting on it.

 _I can't let your father do this to us anymore. I'll end this now._

 _I'll be home by dinnertime, okay? I love you._

 _-B_

No, no, no, no, this isn't happening she thought to herself. Has Barry lost his mind? He wouldn't stand a chance against his father. She tried calling him but it would always go to voicemail. She tried reaching her dad but to no avail. She quickly got up and dressed, thinking of where she might find them. She also contacted Joe hoping that Barry might have talked to him before he left but it seemed that Barry didn't intend to let anyone in on this.

After hours of desperately searching and praying for any sign of Barry, she decided to rest and go home until her phone rang and told her it's Joe calling from the other line.

"Hello? Have you heard from him?" Worry was very much evident in her tone.

"I haven't heard from him but I've got a call. He's in the hospital. I'll text you the details. I'm already on my way." She was unable to speak for who knows how long. She was just standing there, feeling like the world had stopped turning. She eventually returned to her senses and made her way to the hospital Joe texted her about.

When she arrived at the hospital, she saw Joe sitting outside of one of the many rooms there, looking as worried and tired as she was.

"Joe, where is he? I want to see him."

"He's inside. But Caitlin, I need to talk to you first." As much as she wanted to see Barry, she couldn't deny Joe's eyes pleading at her.

"Sure. What is it?"

"Caitlin, I know how much he loves you. Even before, when he met you at that playground, he couldn't stop talking about you. He would always go back there every single day hoping to see the brunette with eyes that shines when she smiles. Just the mere sound of your name made him smiling like an idiot. But when he realized that you won't be coming back anytime soon, he started losing that light, that energy. The only time it came back was when he saw you again. And then I knew, you have become a vital part of his being. You were the only person that made him this happy and I want to thank you for that. But at the same time, you've become someone he's willing to do crazy things for even if it means risking his own life. I don't want him to be that man, the man who will lose himself for someone else. He loves you too much, Caitlin. He loves you way too much it's killing him." As he said those words, tears streamed down his face together with all the emotions he held with it."

"Joe..I'm sorry. I didn't mean for any of this to happen."

"I know Caitlin and I'm not blaming you for this. I just have a favor to ask of you. If you truly love him, let him be. It's selfish I know but I can't lose my son and neither can you."

"I understand. I'll go see him now." She was conflicted in many ways but she made sure of knowing what really is important and that's him. She made her way into his bed, swallowing every selfish thought she had and just focused on what needs to be done.

He was lying there, battered and bruised but he still looked peaceful as ever. He had a cast on his right arm and a swollen eye. She reached up a hand to hold his, not minding the tears quietly descending from her face.

"Hey, why the tears? I hate seeing you like this you know."

"Barry. You didn't have to do this. What were you even thinking?"

"You. I thought you like me bruised and battered, remember? Makes me look more manly you said." She would have laughed at his attempt to joke if they weren't in this situation.

"But not like this, Barry. Not like this. You could've di-"

"But I didn't. Don't worry, Cait. Everything will be alright."

"How can you even say that?"

"Because you're here with me and I'm not going anywhere either. Hell, I couldn't even walk even if I want to." He let out a humorless chuckle. A look of longing stretching across his face.

"What do you mean- no, no, no, no. This isn't happening. Tell me you can still walk. Tell me you can still run. Barry your scholarship-"

"Cait, stop. You remember the time when you asked me why do I love running so much? And I told you it's because when I run, everything on the side blurs, making me feel like I can escape reality. When my mom died, that's all I ever want to do, keeping my focus on the blurring sides because reality was too much for me. But then you came and you made me look up to what's ahead of me. For the first time, I decided not to focus on the sidelines but to look forward towards the goal. Because I knew you'd be waiting for me at the finish line. I might not be able to run right now or even walk for that matter but as long as you're there, waiting for me, I know the race isn't over yet."

"Barry.." It's getting harder and harder for her to do what she had to do when he's talking like this, never giving up on her, on them.

"I know it would take me a lot longer than usual but please tell me this isn't over yet. I need to know that you'll be here when I wake up tomorrow and the days to come."

"Barry you're everything to me, you know that right? You're the man who captured my heart and I assure you that I will forever be yours no matter what. You are my first and will be my last love, don't you ever forget that okay? Because if you do, I'll break your bones myself just so I can take care of you. I love you Barry." She reached up and kissed him, careful not to touch any of his bruises. "Come on, you should get some rest."

"I love you too Cait. Just remember, nothing is ever lost as long as I have you. So you'll be here when I wake up, right?" He's caressing her face with his free hand, not wanting to let go but the medications were slowly overtaking his senses.

She didn't answer. Instead, she just kissed him again.

One last time.

* * *

"Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today..."

Everything fades into silence as she looks up at him. His eyes were beautiful but nothing in comparison to that of him, the sincerest emerald ones that she would never forget. He was the love of her life after all, still is, as she promised herself for as long as they both shall live. Funny how she managed to make that vow when she was here, standing in front of another man that will soon be her other half.

She told herself that she wouldn't cry because she shouldn't. It was her decision after all so she needed to be brave and suck it up. But how can she when her heart felt like it was being torn to pieces now that he wasn't here with her? Then she reminded herself why she was doing this in the first place. She closed her eyes and remembered him.

As she opened her eyes, she hoped that it was all just a bad dream she's gonna wake up from. But when she felt his hands, wiping a few stray tears, she knew there's no way of going back from here.

"I'm sorry I didn't mean to cry."

"It's okay Caitlin, I understand. You don't have to do this if you don't want to."

"I haven't had much choice, Ronnie. It's better this way."

"I don't think he thinks the same way though."

"You're not one to talk. You barely even know him."

"You're right. But trust me when I say that I haven't seen anyone more in love than you two. It's a shame you had to give up so easily." Where did Ronnie found the guts to talk to her this way is still a mystery to her. But all she cares about right now is for him to stop mocking her and just get this over with.

"Just so you know, I didn't give up on my own free will."

"But you didn't fight for him either." His words went straight to her being and as much as she wants to punch him right now, she couldn't. She knew he was right. She didn't fight for him while he was willing to give up just about everything for her. He might not be able to run again for goodness' sake and that was one of the few things (if not only) he really had but then she remembered, _'_ _N_ _othing is ever lost as long as I have you.'_

It keeps on repeating inside her head she just couldn't take it anymore.

"Ronnie, I don't think I can do this."

"I was hoping you would say that. How fast can you run on heels?"

"What? Ronnie, I don't understand-"

"You don't need to. Here, take this. My car is parked right outside this church. I already put your purse in there." He reached for his pocket and handed her a key.

"I don't know what to say. I-"

"Just send me a thank you note later. Now, get out of here before I change mind."

And with that she ran away.

* * *

When she was still young, she dreamed of what she will become when she grows up. She had quite a long list but being a runaway bride isn't one of them. As soon as she reached the outside of the church, rain started pouring hard like the heavens is sympathizing with her. She got into the car and drove like a madman to the only place she wanted to be right now. She dialed his number just to hear the voice she's been longing for months now. She didn't even expect him to answer just his voice on the answering machine would suffice. Surprised is an understatement when he picked up on the third ring.

"Hello."

"Barry. I'm sorry for leaving you like that. I didn't mean to I swear. I knew I should've fought for you but I guess I'm afraid of what-"

"Cait? Calm down okay. Where are you right now? I'm gonna get you."

"It's okay I'm actually on my way there. Wait for me will you? I know I shouldn't be asking you this but Barry I really am sorry. I should've never left you. I should've stayed when you asked me to. I should've been there with you right now where my heels would be right next to your worn-out sneakers by door."

"Cait you're starting to sound like me. I forgive you okay? Just get in here and we'll talk about this. Be safe. I love you."

"I love you too. And I promise when I get there I would never ever leave your side again. You're stuck with me Mr. Allen. You don't know how happy-"

"Hello? Cait? CAIT?! CAITLIN?! NO! Come on, answer me! Damn it! CAIT!"

There was blinding light approaching from the right side of the car. She didn't even see it coming. A loud screeching of tires penetrated her ears but his voice was the last time she heard until it all went black.

* * *

 **END OF PART TWO**

* * *

 **AN:** Thank you for all the lovely reviews jdcocoagirl, AReiss215, Lina, ShanouNash, Raquel and to the guest. It's my first time to write something like this so I really appreciate your kind words. Thanks again!


	3. Chapter 3

" _Cait, it's me Barry. I don't know if you could hear me but if you can, I want you to know that I love you. I hope you don't get tired of hearing that because I know I won't get tired of saying it. But you've gotta help me here, okay? Just think of the dreams we promised to fulfill together. I'd be in CCPD and you'd be in S.T.A.R. Labs and we'll meet halfway everyday to have lunch together. You're supposed to be scolding me for serenading you on your way back to the lab because I know how much it turns you on just hearing my voice. But I guess that'll just have to wait because Cait, I'll be gone for a while. But this doesn't mean goodbye because you'll always have a part of me with you. Now isn't just the right time for us but when it comes I know we'll find each other. You know we always do. Just wait for me, okay? I promise to come back to you, to us."_

 _Tears were streaming down his face and he couldn't do anything to stop it. This is just too much. What have they done to deserve this cruel twist of fate. He held her hand tighter, silently praying that it would wake her up. This was all his fault, he thought. If only he was a better version of himself, someone who could give her the life she deserves. Someone whom her father would deem to be worthy of her. But deep down he knew she wouldn't care about that. She loves him just the way he is, accepted him for who he really was. She would always tell him that she'd pick him over any riches in the world, that he's the one she would only need. But it seemed that not everything and everyone agrees with her. People and circumstances would always get in their way. But it wouldn't be wise to blame anything that is out of your control, would it? So instead, he just took it all to himself. He promised to be the best version of himself there is for when they meet again, nothing will ever be between them. It's going to be just him and her, that's how it's supposed to be._

 _Or so he thought._

* * *

"See you around, slugger!"

"Yeah. See you around Cait." He dearly held the popsicle in his hand while watching her jog to the car waiting for her across the park. Then he decided to go after her and called out,

"Hey, Cait! It's-"

She abruptly woke up, breathing heavily. It's the same dream again, the one keeping her awake in the middle of the night for the last three years. She wouldn't probably be able to go back to sleep if it wasn't for the thought of him being beside her. He sort of developed the ability to sense if she was awake or not because in just a matter of seconds of her waking up from that dream, he would be brought out of his sleep to put his arms around her.

"Same dream?" He asked as he held her tightly in his arms. When she just nodded in response, he continued to comfort her.

"It's okay, I'm here. Let's just go back to sleep, alright?"

"Okay. I'm sorry I woke you up. I just don't know why I keep on having these dreams, and the same one that is. I think it's something to do with-"

"Cait it's alright. I understand. Let's just get some rest, okay?"

"Yeah."

He laid back down on their bed, waiting for her to join him. She placed her head on his chest and wrapped an arm across his waist. He went back to sleep with ease while she was left to her own devices, thinking about the dream she just had. It's been three years since the accident of her life and after being in a coma for five months, everything went back to normal (or that's what they had her believe) and it all went well from then on. Apparently, she's married to this kind, handsome husband of hers. She finished her studies and went to graduate school, got her doctoral degree in just a span of two years. To top it all off, she just received a confirmation earlier this day that S.T.A.R. Labs (where her dream job would be waiting for her hopefully) has taken its interest on her and assigned a schedule for her interview next week. Life has been good, she thinks. And she shouldn't let anything (and by anything she meant that stupid dream of hers) make her believe otherwise. With everything going her way, she's supposed to be happy. She is, if only she can shake off the nagging feeling that something's missing.

The next morning she decided to tell her husband about the news from S.T.A.R Labs and how she would take the job there if ever she would pass the qualifications and the interview.

"Hon?" She asked while preparing the breakfast for her husband.

"Yes?"

"There's something I want to tell you."

"Sure. What is it?"

"You remember S.T.A.R. Labs, right? Well, I kind of sent them my resume and yesterday they sent me an email, containing my schedule for an interview next week."

"S.T.A.R. Labs? I thought they had the place shut down since their last major project literally blew up into pieces." He said, taking a sip of his coffee.

"Yeah but that was a year ago, remember? It was supposed to be closed for good if it wasn't for the new owner who took over. They've been reestablishing it for the last couple of months and today was actually the day of launching the institution under new management. Isn't that great?" She couldn't contain the excitement she has knowing that she'll be a step closer to who she was before.

"I guess. But do you really have to work? You could just stay at home or help me manage your family's business instead. We have more money than most people Caitlin."

"You know it wasn't about money right? Besides you've been good at managing the business for sometime now and we both know it'd be just fine without me in it."

"Yeah but Cait-"

"Please? I need to do this for myself. Do you remember what you told me when I asked you what I was like before the accident happened?"

"You asked me a lot of things back then Cait."

"And one of those questions was why did I want to pursue the career I chose. And you told me-"

"I told you it was because it's your lifelong dream to contribute to any medical breakthroughs in finding a cure for various diseases and S.T.A.R Labs would be the perfect place for that. I remember now, Cait."

"Exactly. So when I heard that S.T.A.R. Labs has been reinstated, I didn't think twice and took the opportunity. It's like telling me that this is what I'm supposed to be doing, don't you think?" He let out a heavy sigh and she knew she has won him over.

"There's nothing I can say to make you change your mind now, huh?"

"I'm afraid there's not. So does that mean you're agreeing with this?"

He nodded and she went to his side of the table to give him a hug.

"Careful Cait, you almost knocked the coffee off." He said smiling up to her.

"I'm sorry. It's just that it really means a lot to me. Thank you."

"Well, l should be on my way now. I have a meeting with your father at nine. Don't want to be late."

He kissed her on the forehead and went on his way. After cleaning up the kitchen, Caitlin went to the living room and opened the tv.

 _ **"We're broadcasting live from S.T.A.R. Laboratories to witness the launch of the newly reestablished institution under new management. It's been over a year since the remarkable particle accelerator explosion that caused the establishment's downfall but after some negotiations and the eventual taking over of the new owner, it has found it's way back as one of Central City's promising organization. Stay tuned for more as we cover the live press conference happening just a few moments from now."**_

She stared at the television thinking that maybe this is just what she needs, fulfilling something that her past self once aspired for. And maybe, just maybe, she'll find pieces of herself along the way.

* * *

"Mr. Allen, you have a promising career back in Starling City working under the multi-billionaire Mr. Oliver Queen himself, why go back here at Central City in the first place?" One of the reporters asked him during the press conference.

"I made a promise to someone and I've intended on keeping that. Going back here in Central City is just one of the many steps on fulfilling that."

"Does this include the reestablishment of S.T.A.R. Labs? Because knowing your line of work, managing this kind of institution isn't one of the things we assume you'd be doing in the future."

"I didn't see this coming either but when I heard about what happened in S.T.A.R Labs, I took it as an opportunity to do what I had to. It was actually her dream to work here and when it had to be shut down, I knew I just can't stand here and do nothing especially now that I have the means to prevent that from happening."

"That was thoughtful of you Mr. Allen but if you would allow it, this 'her' you're talking about, is she your girlfriend?"

A goofy smile spread across his face and he just hopes that the lighting will somehow cover the blush creeping up his cheeks.

"She's uh, she's more than that. She's everything to me and I wouldn't be who I am now if it wasn't for her."

The press boomed with a lot of questions after what he said. So before it becomes out of control, he decided to say his closing speech.

"I would like to thank you all for coming here today especially to Mr. and Mrs. Felicity and Oliver Queen who believed and invested in me back then when I had literally nothing. If it wasn't for their trust, I wouldn't be standing before you all today. So without further adieu, I present to you the new S.T.A.R. Labs."

With that, he exited the hall and went to his office with Cisco following closely behind him. Felicity and Oliver had to leave as soon as possible since they also have a meeting to attend to back in Starling City. Cisco is one of the few loyal employees at S.T.A.R. Labs who decided to stay until the day when it's supposed to be closed so when it didn't happen, he worked with Barry in the reestablishment of the lab. He's just a bit too friendly to be considerate of the whole boss and employee dynamic but Barry could roll with that (although at times he couldn't help but want to strangle him, who wouldn't?).

"Woah dude. You're so awesome back there." Cisco said while patting his shoulder.

"Yeah? I know that tone. Come on, spill it."

"Okay you were awesome for a while but then you just had to turn into this hopeless romantic guy wanting to give everything for this girl. Really dude?"

"I bet you haven't fallen in love the way I did because if you do then you would know where I'm coming from."

"And be way more cheesy than a four-cheese pizza? No, thanks. Who is she by the way? I haven't seen you with a woman in the last couple of months we've worked together."

"Actually, I haven't seen her in the last three years."

"What? So you've been doing all this stuff for someone you haven't seen for the last three freaking years?! Are you out of your mind?"

"You know I've been asking myself the same question." He chuckled. "But once you find the one, you'd do anything for her. Even if it meant having to let her go at one point."

"Whatever, dude. But did it ever occur to you that maybe, in those years, she has moved on? Or I don't know, maybe even got married?! Seriously, what's wrong with you?"

"Say what you want but I haven't given up on her okay? And I have a strong feeling that she hasn't either. So could you do me a favor and leave me to my own devices? We still have a lot of paperwork to accomplish."

"Fine. But if you two won't work out, well that's probably her loss. I don't want to say this but I haven't seen someone as crazy as you. And for a good reason, that is."

"Thanks, Cisco."

"Well that could change if she's hot. Is she hot? Come on shoot me some numbers here-"

"Just get out already!"

As soon as he got rid of Cisco, he couldn't help but think about what he said. He wouldn't deny the fact that he's been filled with those what-ifs since the day he decided to leave. But at that time, he knew it was the right thing to do. If he had stayed and did nothing, he probably won't have the chance of seeing her ever again. Hell, he wasn't even allowed to come visit her in the hospital. So he knew he had to do the ultimate sacrifice and leave her for a while. But what if Cisco is right? What if she had really moved on? He couldn't let himself think that way but it's still a possibility right? All he did would be for nothing. But that's okay, he thought. Because it wasn't about him in the first place. He has long forgotten about his own happiness when he met her. Happiness, for him, is something he could truly feel when he's with her. So whenever she's happy, he'll be too. Even if she finds that happiness with someone else.

* * *

This is the day Caitlin has been eagerly waiting for. She sees to it that she has everything she needs before going to the interview. Her purse, phone, keys, her wit and confidence, even her outfit is on point. So with one last look at the mirror, she decided she is ready to go. But then she remembered one vital thing that she didn't do. Of all the things why did she forget to look him up and made a background check. She doesn't even have a clue to what he's like, well except for the fact that he's such a sweet guy (albeit a sappy romantic) if what he said on the press conference was true. But she'll just have to see for herself, right? Besides there was no way she was going to ditch the interview of her life. So with a, "Okay Caitlin, let's do this." to herself, she drove to S.T.A.R. Labs.

On the other hand, Barry wasn't in a better state either. He swore he could've thought this through way better than what he's doing right now but just the mere thought of seeing her again was enough to send his head into overdrive. But what if she wouldn't show up? That could really mean one thing, she hates him and wouldn't want to see him again. Or, she actually didn't survive the accident which would be a crazy thought because they have received her resume just a few weeks ago. Wait a minute, they did receive her résumé meaning she wanted to go to S.T.A.R Labs and work for him. But he hasn't made himself known as the new owner of the lab until last week. Okay, all this talking to himself is literally driving him crazy.

"Man, I should've ask Felicity to look her up before I even went back here. Now look how hopelessly clueless I am. And here I thought my plan was flawless. There's still time, I just need to make a quick call-"

"Mr. Allen, she's here." That's a good sign right? It means she still wants to see him, or she just went here to say that they're done. He really needs to stop having conversations inside his head. Deciding that it's now or never, he said, "Okay, let her in."

Caitlin has been waiting outside his office for a couple of minutes now, torturing her lower lip in the process. She was shaken out of her thoughts when she heard the secretary say, "Mr. Allen will see you now."

She went inside his office and as soon as their eyes made contact, she felt as if her heart would beat out of her chest. She isn't supposed to be feeling this way. She's married for goodness' sake and hasn't she promised to love her husband til death on their wedding day (that is if she could remember doing that). This man had an effect on her she couldn't even understand. And little did she know that she has the same effect on him too. Because for the second time, Barry Allen couldn't find the ability to speak again (the first time was because of her too) and was left stating at her until she asked,

"Mr. Allen, is everything alright?" Her voice is just as he remembered it, the one that can only make his knees go weak.

"Huh? Yeah. It's just that it's really good to see you again, Dr. Caitlin Snow." Something tells him that this isn't his Caitlin, like she was an entirely different person. But that's impossible, isn't it? He's about to set aside that thought when he heard her say,

"Actually, it's Dr. Caitlin Raymond. I'm sorry but, have we met before?".

* * *

 **END OF PART THREE**

* * *

AN: Thanks for all the reviews!

It motivates me to write. Thank you for being so patient with this fic.


	4. Chapter 4

_"Ronnie please, I know she's awake. You've got to let me see her." Barry pleaded outside of Caitlin's room, his eyes searching the blinds for just a mere glimpse of her._

 _"Barry, what are you doing here?! You're supposed to be gone by now. Haven't you forgotten about our deal? I've already let you see her that one time. It's time you do your part."_

 _"I know I agreed to that but please, I just need to properly say goodbye to her. I promise I'll leave her alone after that."_

 _"You know I can't let you do that. And please don't make a scene here. We're at a hospital for goodness' sake!"_

 _"I'm not gonna leave until you let me talk to her." As desperation took over his body, he frantically knocked on the glass window while shouting her name. "Cait, it's Barry! I know you can hear me. Please just let me in. I need to talk to you."_

 _The door swung open, revealing a very furious Mr. Snow whose death glares were directed solely at Barry._

 _"Please, Mr. Snow I beg of you. Just let me see her-" He was silenced by a right hook going straight to his jaw. Barry stumbled backwards as Caitlin's father continued on his assault._

 _"And you really had the audacity to show up here after all that's happened? My daughter is like this because of you! You took everything from her and now she wouldn't be the same as she was before!"_

 _"Mr. Snow, I don't understand. What do you mean by-"_

 _"You don't have to know alright. But this time, I'll make sure you wouldn't be a part of her life anymore. She would never know that you even existed."_

 _"Sir please, I beg of you. I need to know what happened to her."_

 _"I'll say this one last time, leave her alone or I swear you won't get to see even a strand of my daughter's hair." He went back inside the room, shutting the door on Barry's face._

 _"Barry you need to go or I'll have to drag you out myself."_

 _"Ronnie please, you know how much she means to me. You've got to help me."_

 _"Look Barry, the last time I let Caitlin go just to be with you lead into this. Until now and maybe for the rest of my life, I would still blame myself for what happened to her. And now you expect me to help you again? Hasn't it occurred to you that maybe this whole thing happened to let you know that you two were not meant to be together? I've let her go once I'm not doing it again. So please just leave."_

 _Barry knew that at that moment, there's no way they'll let him see her. So with a heavy heart and a burning passion of keeping his promise to her, he decided that it's time for him to leave._

 _"I understand. But I just need to know one thing before I go. Tell me she's okay and you won't be hearing from me anymore."_

 _"She's okay. The doctors said that it might take a while for her to be discharged but her condition is stable now."_

 _"That's all I need to know."_

* * *

"Actually it's Dr. Caitlin Raymond. I'm sorry but, have we met before?"

He just stared at her in utter disbelief. Is this some kind of a joke? He would've understood if she would lash out at him (or maybe even accept a slap or two from her) but this? How could she not remember him? As if reading his thoughts, she said,

"I'm sorry if I don't recognize you Sir. You see there was this accident three years ago and it kind of took my memory from me."

For years, the words of Caitlin's father has been a puzzle for Barry but now that he heard her say this, it all started to make sense. Well, that explains why she never even contacted him or even looked for him in those years. At first he thought it was just her father's doing but he knew Caitlin better than that. She is stubborn and the moment she learns that he had left, she would do everything to find him (either to go after him or kill him for leaving her). Everything is too much for him to take all at once so he decided that he just needs to let this all sink in before he does anything stupid. So instead, he just redirected his focus on what really matters now, the interview.

"Uhm, no. Don't worry about it. So tell me Dr. Sno-Raymond, what made you decide to work here at S.T.A.R. Labs?" Deciding that maybe this isn't the right time to tell her who he really is, he proceeded to the interview proper.

"My reasons are very personal, if you don't mind sir. I came here because I really want to contribute to many medical breakthroughs and I know S.T.A.R. Labs would be the perfect place for that. At first I thought I was just doing my past self a favor because my husband told me it was my lifelong dream ever since but when I learned that my father is diagnosed with stage 3 cancer earlier this year, I realized that regardless of who I was before or who I am now, this is what I really want to do."

"Your dedication has impressed me Dr. Raymond or should I just call you Caitlin?" The way her first name came out of his mouth almost made her head spin. It felt like he had been calling that many times before. But she just met him, right?

"Either is fine, sir."

"Please it's Barry. I'm not used to people addressing me like that. I'm so sorry about your father, Caitlin. If there's anything I could do to help just let me know." He had to admit that he was never a fan of her dad but knowing the fact that he is sick, affects him. That's just how good-natured he is.

"It's okay Si-Barry. My husband has been very supportive of me ever since we found out."

"Of course he is." He didn't mean it to come out like that but he still wasn't comfortable with the fact that the love of his life is married to another man.

"Your husband, what was he like?" He knew he wasn't supposed to ask that in a job interview but what the hell. He just needs to know if she is in good hands.

"He's kind and supportive. He was actually very patient with me after the accident happened. He wouldn't force me to do things that I'm not comfortable with." She's starting to think if this is still a part of the interview or it's just him being friendly to her.

"Do you, uhm, do you love him?" That was so over the line even for his own ears.

"I uhm.." She's supposed to say she loves him right? The man in question is her husband for goodness' sake. _But you don't even remember loving him,_ the inner part of her being whispering to her like a bird wanting to get out of a cage. Why was he even asking this in the first place?

"He makes me happy." Was all she managed to reply. At least part of that is true.

 _That's all I needed to hear,_ he said to himself. Although he's dying on the inside, he still managed to give her a smile.

"That would be all, Caitlin. And together with your unquestionable résumé and impressive educational background, I can say you're more than qualified to work here. I'll ask Cisco to guide you in your first day. But knowing how brilliant you are, I don't think you'd be needing assistance any way. Welcome to S.T.A.R. Labs."

"Thank you very much sir. I'll be looking forward on working with you." She said as she accepted the hand he held out to her. As soon as their hands made contact, she felt a spark coursing through her veins. If he felt it too, (which he did) she wouldn't know because he already motioned to his secretary that the interview was over.

As soon as she left his office, he called for Cisco.

"Hey man, you wanted to see me?"

"Yeah. I need you to take over for a while."

"What? Why?"

"I need to talk to someone. I feel like my head's gonna burst any minute now."

"You okay? You know you can talk to me right? We're bros after all."

"Yeah, thanks. But right now, I really have to go."

"Okay, and you'll be gone for how long?"

"Couple of weeks? I don't know. I just need to clear my head." He said as he headed for the door.

"Fine. But you me a lot of Big Belly Burger for this, Barry!" Cisco called out to him as he disappeared to the cortex.

* * *

Caitlin went home that night to see Ronnie waiting for her in the living room.

"So how was the interview?" He said, giving her a kiss on the cheek.

"It's fine. I actually got the job."

"Well, you don't seem too happy about it."

"I am it's just that there's something about my boss. I get the feeling that I know him but he said we haven't met before."

"Yeah? Who is he by the way? I haven't had the chance to watch the news lately." He asked as they walked to the kitchen to prepare dinner.

"He's Barry, Barry Allen." As soon as she uttered those words, Ronnie's face visibly went pale good thing she was facing the sink opposite from him. When he didn't answer, she turned to him and asked,

"Ronnie, you okay? You seem a little pale."

"No, I'm fine. Don't worry about me. I'm just gonna get some rest. It's been a long day at work."

"What about dinner? We still haven't-"

"I'm not hungry."

This is the first time she's seen Ronnie like this. Well, she has seen him nervous before, every time she would ask about what they were like before the accident happened. But now, he seemed off like something's bothering him. Was it because of her boss? But what about him? These past three years, she noticed that her dad and Ronnie didn't talk much about her life before the accident. They would always tell her to just focus on the present and continue moving forward. But how can she do that when the questions of her past is still haunting her? She needs to find the answers and she intended to do just that.

* * *

With everything happening so fast, Barry knew he needed to take his time and let this all sink in for a while. But he couldn't do that if the main reason for all this pain and confusion would be waltzing to his office everyday. He needs to think this through and clear his head and he just know the right place to go.

"Back already? I heard your great conquest of love didn't go as planned, huh?"

"Felicity?"

"Well, what do you expect? She's been the biggest fan of your love life since you came here at Starling."

"Yeah about that. I actually came here to talk to you."

"What about?"

"I know I should be talking to Felicity about this stuff and all but she can really be irrational at times and you're the only one who can really talk some sense into me-"

"Just spill it Barry."

"Yeah, just spill it Barry." Felicity decided to join the conversation (although uninvited) and was met by Barry's surprised expression.

"Hey, don't give me that look. And for the record, I am not irrational. There are just times that us girls get a bit more emotional than usual and I say, blame it on the hormones."

"I can't believe this." Barry said, shaking his head.

"Come on just tell us. We don't have all day, Mr. Allen." Felicity said, taking a seat next to Oliver with both her hands supporting her head, eagerly waiting for what Barry has to say.

"Okay fine." He let out a heavy sigh before continuing, "So the other day, she went to my office for her interview. Apparently, she's married to the same guy who she left at the altar to be with me. But that's not even the worst part. The accident she had three years ago which forced me to make the dumbest decision of my life has also caused her to lose her memories. Now I understand what her father meant when he said that she won't even know I existed because apparently, everything about me, the times we had, the moments we shared were kept as a secret from her. Everything is just too much so when she asked if she knew me, I said no and now I don't even know what to do. What if her memories will come back? For sure she would hate me for lying to her but hey I didn't have much choice. What was I supposed to say? Hey Caitlin, remember me? I'm the boy you met once in a playground whom you've fallen in love with to the point where you literally left your husband in the altar for and-"

"Woah, okay Barry just stop right there. You're becoming worse than me. Just take a breath and let let us have this sink in for a while, okay?"

"Felicity, honey, could you leave us alone for a while? I think Barry and I need to do this alone." She gave him a disbelieving look but she knew that expression on his face so with a sigh she said,

"Fine. But you need to fill me in with the details later. And by details I meant all of it." With that, she left his office, leaving Barry and Oliver to have their talk.

"Come on say it. I knew you're itching to say the words 'I told you so'."

"I am but I don't think that could help you right now. Remember when you would always ask me why I decided to help you back then?"

"You said it was because I had potential."

"Right. But that wasn't the main reason. The first time I met you, you're a man who really had nothing to lose. Nothing to lose but love. And believe when I say that I wasn't the biggest fan of love at that time. Love for me is just a game, not to be taken seriously. But that's the opposite of what I saw in you. You made love as an instrument of hope, it's what kept you going all these years even if you're not even sure whether she's still waiting for you or not."

"And now she's married and didn't even have a clue to who I am."

"Everything happens for a reason Barry. Tell me, what could've happened if she didn't lose her memories?"

"She'd probably run away with me again or if we weren't lucky, her dad will send her to a place I wouldn't know about."

"And if she did run away with you, was that the life you wanted her to have?"

"No, of course not. That's why I decided to leave her that time, hoping that someday I could give her the life she deserves. But now that I can, I already lost her."

"Maybe you should accept that fact and move on."

"I don't think I can do that, Oliver. I don't think I can stop loving her."

"I'm not asking you to stop loving her. I'm just asking you to love her in a different way, one a friend could provide."

"What if her memories would come back? What do I do then?"

"I don't have all the answers to your questions Barry. But when it comes, I just think you should leave the decision to her."

"I guess you're right. Thank you, Oliver. This conversation really helped me a lot."

"Anytime. I think we should just call it quits since you helped me with Felicity back then."

"Yeah maybe we should."

"So what are you planning to do now?"

"I'm just gonna spend the weekend here since I won't be coming back for a while. Besides I have a friendship to build back in Central City."

"I must say, I'm so proud of you Barry. You might not get the girl now but who knows what the future may bring."

After spending the weekend at Starling City, he knew it was time for him to go back. He knew deep inside that he was never going to be ready to face her knowing she didn't have any recollection of who he is but he thought it was better that way for now. Oliver is right. Maybe the future has something in store for him and who knows? Maybe her memories would go back sooner than expected. But until then, he would just have to keep on admiring her, loving her, although from a distance.

* * *

With just two weeks of working with Cisco, Caitlin felt like she found a brother in him that she never had. Being an only child can be lonely at times so she very much cherished his company. Plus, he had a mini fridge where he keeps all his frozen treats that she can rummage from time to time.

"Okay, Caitlin. You've got to taste this. This popsicle tastes so awesome you'd forget your name with just a bite." She laughed so hard with what he just said, clearly oblivious to what she's gone through in the last three years. With a confused look he said,

"Hey, what's so funny? The divine taste of this popsicle is nothing to be laughed about."

"No, it's not about that. I haven't told you this but there was an accident three years ago and it also made me forget my name. That among all of my other memories."

"Woah. I didn't know that. Tell me more." If she didn't know better, she'd think that Cisco is one of those gossip girls.

"There's nothing much to say. You see, I'm in a coma for five months then when I woke up, I don't have any recollection of who I was before."

"How did you feel?"

"I couldn't describe it. You feel empty and sad and overwhelmed with everything that wants to come out all at the same time. And then you have to deal with the life that they've been imposing to you. It's not everyday that you wake up and find out that you're ma-"

"Hey Cisco! Shouldn't you be on your workspace by now? Lunch time was over like 10 minutes ago." Barry said as he barged into the lab.

"Barry! Thank goodness you're back! Managing this whole thing is really stressing me out. You got my burgers?" He face lit up when he handed him a takeout bag.

"You're the best man. Maybe you should leave more often. Or not because all this decision making is totally not cool. Speaking of which, Caitlin here has a proposal to go on a field trip by herself."

"It wasn't a field trip, Cisco. I need it for my research."

"Okay whatever. Just talk to Barry about it while I munch on this greasy goodness."

"See me at my office in five minutes, Caitlin and we'll talk about it."

"Sure. Thank you sir." When he gave her a look she said, "I mean, Barry."

* * *

After reviewing Caitlin's proposal, Barry didn't have anything against it except for one thing.

"So Caitlin, your proposal is flawless. Great job with the research but I don't think I should let you go alone."

"What? But Si-Barry, those plants are seasonal and are rather rare. If I don't go now, I might not be able to find another one in the next couple of months or maybe even ever. Please you need to let me go."

"I don't think you heard me right, Caitlin. I told you, you can't go alone."

"So what does it mean?"

"If you have to go, you'll have to take me with you."

* * *

 **END OF PART FOUR**

* * *

AN: I want to apologize for the previous chapters being so long and jam-packed. Originally, this story is supposed to end on just two chapters but when an idea came to mind, I decided to prolong the storyline. I hope you don't mind. Anyways, thanks for the reviews! Should you have any comments/suggestions feel free to let me know.

-A


	5. Chapter 5

The trip to the mountains is nothing but awkward for both Barry and Caitlin. Well, mostly for Barry's part because it's not everyday that you get to spend at least two days of camping alone with your ex-girlfriend who you still have feelings for (despite being married) even though she doesn't have any idea who you were. But he needs to set aside that thought real quick because he has decided that this trip will be his first step on building a friendship with her. So as their car halted to a stop, he thought that work would be a good conversation starter.

"So uh, Caitlin. How's working at S.T.A.R. Labs so far?" He said while keeping his eyes on the road.

She's biting her lower lip, feeling the awkwardness between them before she answered, "It's actually more than what I expected. It's too surreal, sometimes I still find myself in trance to be really working there. Good thing Cisco's always there to snap me back into reality. Although he does it literally at times." For the first time since their reunion, he saw a smile slowly creeping up her face and the way it makes him feel is so nostalgic he can't help but smile back.

"So I see you've met him, huh? Quite a peculiar guy he is."

"You can say that again. I've never seen a guy who's as passionate about sweets as he is about mechanical engineering." The awkward air that has been hovering over them just moments ago were slowly dissipating. Caitlin found it amusing how their conversation just flows with ease, like they've been doing it a lot before.

"You talk like you know him better than I do. I'm feeling jealous." He joked to lighten the mood even more.

"Oh don't be. We're like talking about you half the time." Her statement almost made him hit the breaks.

"Really? What does he say about me? All good things I hope."

"Yeah, of course. You're still our boss you know." He chuckled at her attempt at a joke.

"That's what I thought you'd say." Now it was her turn to smile.

"But kidding aside, he told me how good of a person you are. Like how you even considered reestablishing S.T.A.R. Labs just for someone who's really special to you."

"He told you that? I guess now you're thinking that I'm a-"

"Sappy romantic?" She cut him off and he couldn't help but laugh at that.

"What's so funny? Did I say something wrong?" She suddenly felt conscious of herself.

"No, it's just that someone told me the same thing before. She used to tease me about being one but I knew it's one of the things she loved about me." A sad smile spread on his face as he remembered the good old days.

"Is she the one you mentioned at the press conference? Where is she anyway?"

"She, uh, she's gone. But I'll make sure I'll find her again. I need to bring her back." _'If you can't come back to me then I'll just have to bring you back to yourself, Cait.'_ He thought to himself as he looked at her with longing in his eyes.

"I'm so sorry to hear that. But who ever she is, she's one lucky girl." She gave him a soft smile.

"I'm the lucky one. Well, enough about me. Cisco told me you had an accident and it kind of took your memories. I can't imagine how hard that was for you."

"He really doesn't know how to keep secrets, does he?"

"He's incapable of that. I'm sorry I shouldn't have mentioned it."

"No, it's alright. I don't have much friends to talk to regarding this so I find it refreshing to share with someone. I hope that's okay with you?"

"It's perfect. I mean it's what friends do right? That is if you want to be friends with me." He asked nervously, gripping the steering wheel a bit tighter.

"Of course, I'd love that. Since the accident I haven't been with a lot of people. It's always dad and Ronnie so I don't think it wouldn't hurt if I add you and Cisco to my nonexistent circle of friends."

"That would be great. Cisco needs a little scolding at times."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing. I just thought that you could be a little uptight you know." He really needs to stop talking if he doesn't want Caitlin to know the truth before the time he actually planned on doing so.

"You talk like you really know me. Are you sure we haven't met before?" She asked, narrowing her eyes at him.

"Oh, look! We're here. Just let me find a place to leave the car and we'll gather our things for the trek." That was too close. He made a mental note to watch his words more carefully next time.

* * *

After hours of going up the mountain and searching for the plants, Barry and Caitlin decided to set up their camp before the night strikes and decided to continue their search first thing in the morning.

"So what do you think of this spot, Caitlin?"

"This is perfect. Not too crowded and there's a tree which can provide us with some shade against rain or if the sunlight's too strong at noon. There's also a stream nearby."

"Okay then this is it. Let's set up your tent first, okay? Come on I'll help you." He said and took one of her bags to get the materials he needed.

"Have you tried camping before? You really look like you've done this a lot of times before." She asked when she noticed how easy it is for him to set up a tent.

"I did, couple of times. It's actually one of the things she enjoyed doing and since I haven't had much money back then, we'd have to settle for things like this. She'll drive and I'll set up camp. It's just us and sometimes her favorite bag of chips. How about you?" He asked, silently praying that maybe telling her about the things they used to do in the past would help her remember. He's actually not sure how long can he hide the truth from her but he just have to be patient for now.

"Don't laugh, okay? This is actually my first time. My dad said I always spend my free time at home, reading." His face grew dimmer at what she said. Her father must've hated him so much to lie not just about him but even the things about his own daughter.

"Hey, you don't have to be disappointed about it you know. Look on the brighter side, maybe you can even teach me how to set up a tent or even make fire." She beamed at him like she always did before and it only made his heart break a little more.

"Uhm, yeah sure. Just let me get my bag. I knew I put my tent in there." He started to look for his own tent but to no avail. Caitlin started to notice that he's been searching for it for quite sometime.

"Barry, is everything okay?"

"Yeah. I knew I brought my tent with me but now it's gone."

"What do you mean it's gone?" She asked suspiciously.

"By gone I meant I must've forgotten to bring it with me since we left the car." He said as he nervously scratched the back of his neck.

"What?! You have got to be kidding me."

"I wish I am. But it's okay, Caitlin. I'll just stay here outside with nothing to shield me at night when it gets cold. I'll be standing outside your tent and wait for the wild animals to devour me alive while you sleep soundly-"

"Okay, fine! Just stop talking, okay? I'll let you share the tent with me." He raised an amused eyebrow at her. "Not with me- _with me_ okay? I mean you'll have your side and I'll have mine. And don't even think about taking advantage of me because I'll make sure you'll regret it. I don't care if you're my boss, I'll sue you if I have to." She said while poking his chest with her finger and he did nothing but raised his hands up in defense. He wondered if Caitlin really lost her memories or she was just pretending to mess with him. Man, some things don't really change huh?

"Woah. Getting defensive are we, Dr. Snow? Don't worry I'm not into married women." He said and winked at her. Leaving her flustered as he went to put his things inside the tent.

"For the last time, it's Dr. Raymond!" What's with this guy, she thought. Earlier when they're having their conversation at the car, she thought she had him all figured out. So much for being a good person (albeit a sappy romantic). But now she felt like she's in for a rollercoaster ride. She couldn't explain it but she felt the need to know more about him. The mere thought of what he has to offer makes her excited. Her train of thought was interrupted when he called out to her,

"Caitlin, come on. It's time I'll teach you how to make fire."

"You know what? I think you could do that alone. I'm no longer in the mood for all this camping stuff."

"Aww, come on. Don't be a killjoy." He said as he gathered some firewood he found near the trees.

"I'm not a killjoy, okay? It's just that I have better things to do." She said as she headed towards the tent. She's about to enter when he said,

"Of course you have. I bet your book would be really lonely without your company."

Okay that was it. How can he get on her nerves in record time is still a mystery to her.

"Give me that and watch me do it myself. I don't think I need your help in starting a fire. I've read about these and I know how it works theoretically." She literally shoved him aside and started her attempt in making fire. He just watched there, amused. If this is as close as he can be with her right now, then it's totally okay. It's better than not seeing her at all, right?

After a lot of almost there comments from her, a haggard-looking Caitlin finally decided that her theory on starting a fire isn't as accurate as she hoped it would be.

"Okay fine. You win. I give up. This is just impossible you know." She said, letting out an exasperated sigh. He just stood there with a serious look on his face. Then she went towards her, picking up dried leaves on his way.

"That's because you've been doing it the wrong way. Here let me teach you." He said as he took both of her hands in his and gestured the right way of starting a fire. "You just have to put your hands together like this with the stick firmly placed in between them. Then start to rub them together really fast with the motion going downwards. The dried leaves at the end of stick will help speed up the process."

As he held her hands tightly and with his face mere inches from hers, she couldn't deny how her heart started beating rapidly. She knew that the moment he caught her staring, she should've quickly looked away. But she didn't. Instead she just kept on looking at him, mesmerized by the deep emerald of his eyes. She noticed as he drew a bit closer to her and it should have made her feel uncomfortable if not for the fact that it didn't. It actually made her want to do the opposite, to lessen the already small space between them. One of his hands went to caress her cheek and she couldn't deny how it felt so familiar. She's about to put her hand on top of his if it wasn't for the headache she felt so suddenly. He must've noticed because he quickly removed his hand and examined her.

"Caitlin are you okay? Is something wrong?"

"No, I'm fine. It's just that my head started pounding all of a sudden."

"Do you need anything? I can get you something to ease the pain."

"It's fine really. The doctor warned me about this before. It's only normal for people who's suffering from amnesia. Maybe I should lie down for a while."

"Okay. Let me help you walk to the tent."

"No, it's okay. I got it. Don't worry about me. Just start the fire so we can have dinner later."

"Uhm, yeah sure."

As Barry is preparing dinner for the two of them, he couldn't help but think about what happened (or what could've happened) a little earlier. For a minute there, he thought it wasn't too late for them, that the possibility of them being together can still happen. But he knew Caitlin, she never breaks her promises. And if she vowed to love her husband for the rest of her life then that's what she would do. He could only hope that their love can outweigh whatever promise they've made to other people.

After having dinner, Barry and Caitlin both settled for the night. As for Caitlin's rules, he'll have his own side of the tent and she'll have hers but that didn't stop Barry from bothering her.

"You asleep, Caitlin?" He asked as he lay there with his eyes glued on the roof of the tent.

"I would've been if you didn't ask me the same question fifteen minutes ago." She answered a bit angrily.

"I really had fun today. It's been a long time since I've done this kind of stuff. So I want to say thank you for letting me come with you."

"If you've already forgotten, _sir._ Let me remind you that you're the one who insisted in coming with me. If I had a choice I wouldn't let you come in the first place."

"Oh, right. So you could build the tent and start a fire yourself which reminds me that you're incapable of doing both."

"At least then I had a tent to build unlike a certain someone who had-I don't know-forgotten to bring his tent in the first place."

"Maybe I did that on purpose so I can share the tent with you." He mumbled to himself.

"What was that?"

"Nothing. Good night Dr. Snow."

"I told you _sir,_ it's-"

But then Barry faked a loud snore. And Caitlin couldn't help but groan inwardly.

"You know what never mind. Have a good night sir."

* * *

The next morning, Caitlin woke up just to find out that Barry has already left the tent. She immediately stood up and went outside to look for him. Nothing could ever prepare her for what she's about to see. Because there he was, bathe under the early morning light, splitting firewood in nothing but pants and an axe in one hand, sweat glistening his upper body. She must've been staring for a while because when he called out to her, a smirk is evident on his face.

"You okay, Caitlin? You look flustered."

"No. It's all good, uh your abs is good, uh I mean I'm good. I'm fine. Everything's fine." She said accompanied by a lot of hand gestures she wasn't even used to do herself.

"If you say so. You can do more than just staring you know-"

"What?! I wasn't staring, okay?"

"Really? I thought you said-"

"I didn't say anything, okay? Maybe you should see a doctor. You've been imagining things that really didn't happen."

"You're a doctor right? Why don't you take a closer look since you seem good in doing just that." He smirk just grew even wider while her face turned a little redder than it already was.

"For the record Barry! I wasn't checking you out-"

"I didn't say anything about you checking me out-"

"Ugh, you're impossible! You know what? I'm just gonna go back inside so you don't have to worry about me checking you out. Are you happy now?" She half screamed and stormed inside the tent. He's more than happy alright. He made a small happy dance as he proudly mumbled to himself,

"You still got it, Barry Allen."

* * *

After their not so awkward morning with Barry trying to catch Caitlin's eyes all the while and Caitlin purposefully avoiding his, they started to continue their search for the medicinal plants. It wasn't an easy task for both of them. There were times when Barry has to climb steep rocks just to find a sample of the plant only for Caitlin to say that it wasn't what they were looking for. Soon enough they've had collected a decent amount of samples and they're just about to return to the camp to pack when Barry noticed that something is missing from him.

"Everything alright Barry?" Caitlin asked when she noticed him become agitated about something.

"Yeah. I'm not just sure if I lost my watch or I just didn't put it on earlier this morning."

"Maybe we should get back to camp and check first. I have a feeling that it will rain soon since the sky is getting darker. It'll be dangerous if it starts to pour and we're outside the camp."

"Yeah, you're right."

So when they reached the camp, the first thing Barry did is to check his things only to find out that his watch is not there.

"Barry, where are you going?"

"I knew I had it before we left this morning. I'm just going to go back and check the places where it must have fallen off."

"Barry, just stay here okay? It's gonna rain anytime soon. It's dangerous out there." She held his arm, not willing to let him go.

"Caitlin I'll be quick. I just need to find it. It's really important."

"But Barry-"

"Look if you let me go now, there's a bigger chance that I'll find it before the rain starts. So please I have to do this. Stay here, okay? I'll be back."

Before she could protest any further, he was out of her grasp and eventually out of sight. There's this tugging feeling in her heart that's both familiar and foreign to her.

Thirty minutes later and the rain started to pour. Barry still hasn't come back and all Caitlin could do is hope and pray that he'll be alright. She almost thought of going after him when he saw his blurred image running towards the tent.

"Barry, are you alright? Did you find it?" She asked, her eyes searching for any injury he might have. When she didn't find any, she let out a breath she didn't know she was holding.

"Yeah." He said while catching his breath then lifted his hand to let her see the watch.

"It has stopped working. Maybe you should take it to a shop to have it fixed when we go back to Central City."

"There's no need for that. It has stopped working a long time ago."

"Then why did risk your life for something that's been broken a long time ago? Barry, do you not consider your life important? You could've di-"

"But I didn't. This watch means so much to me. It may seem broken to you or to anyone for that matter but to me it's not. It keeps me together, reminding me that all broken things just need time to be put back together. Don't you agree, Caitlin?"

"Yeah, I guess."

"Deep down I know she's still there and I won't stop until she becomes whole again."

There's something about his words that made her think that there's more to him than what she assumed him to be. Despite being a tease most of the time, she felt that deep down, Barry Allen is someone who would never give up on love. So whoever that girl is, she really is a lucky one.

"Did someone gave you that watch?"

"It's actually the last gift I received from her before-"

"Barry!" Caitlin rushed to his side as he fell into the ground. "You're burning up. Come on you need to change into dry clothes. Your wet clothes will only worsen your condition." He's unconscious by the time Caitlin brought him to his sleeping bag so she doesn't have a choice but to undress him herself. She's a doctor for goodness' sake and the thought of changing her patient's clothes shouldn't make her so nervous as it does right now.

After minutes of debating whether she should peek or not, she finally (somehow) managed to change his clothes. His temperature still hasn't dropped so she decided to make him take some medicines first before he continues sleeping.

"Hey, Barry. Come on you need to wake up and eat. I can't let you have medicine with an empty stomach." She said gently as she shook him awake.

"Caitlin, please just let me be. I don't have the energy to get up and eat." Who knew that her boss, the owner of S.T.A.R. Labs, can be such a baby when he's sick.

"Don't be such a baby, okay? I promise after you eat and drink your medicine, you're gonna feel a lot better."

"Promise?"

"Yeah, promise. Now come on, get up and eat your soup. I don't have the means to heat it up so you'll just have to take it straight from the can, okay?"

"But my arms are tired from getting all your samples. Feed me?" She doesn't know if he's just messing with her but with one look at his tomato red face, she couldn't find the strength to say no.

"Okay, fine." She said as she rolled her eyes. "But only because you helped me gather those plants." She then proceeded to feed him and soon enough he finished the whole can of chicken noodle soup.

"Okay Barry, time for your medicine." She said and gave him a tablet to swallow which he didn't hesitate to take.

"That's a good boy. Now get some sleep okay? You'll feel better in the morning."

She's about to leave his side when he suddenly grabbed her hand and said, "Caitlin, it's cold. Please stay."

"Barry-"

"Please." His grip on her hand went a bit tighter. The rain hasn't stopped yet and it really is cold even for her so even if she wanted to argue, she decided against it and gave in to his whims.

"Fine. Just let me get my sleeping bag okay?" She's about to get up when he said,

"Please don't leave me again."

"Barry, I'm just getting my sleeping bag. I'll come back I promise." With that, she went to her side of the tent and took her sleeping bag. She put it close to Barry's and tried to fuse it together so that they'll be sleeping side by side with the cover hovering above the two of them.

As soon as she settled herself beside Barry, he immediately put his arms around her. She's about to give him a piece of her mind (not caring whether he's sick or not) when she heard a, "Thanks for everything always, Cait."

 _Cait._ His voice reverberated throughout her being and she's dying to ask him whether she heard him right because there's no way right? But when she turned to him, he's sleeping soundly, leaving her to wander in her own thoughts.

The next morning, Caitlin woke up just to find Barry staring down at her with a devilish smile on his face.

"Finally you decided to wake up. Any moment longer I'll have to sue you for taking advantage of me when I'm at my lowest point. Your death grip on my waist is keeping me from moving. So much for taking advantage of you, huh?"

"So I see you're feeling well now. Because just last night you were all like _'please don't leave me again, Caitlin'_ " She said as she untangled herself from him.

"I said that?" He asked as he tried to remember what happened last night.

"Yeah. That among other embarrassing stuff I could use to blackmail you."

"I'm sorry I didn't know what came over me." His sudden change in behavior didn't go unnoticed by her. But she decided to just let it be since they have to focus on packing and wrapping things up before they go.

* * *

As they headed back to Central City, she noticed that he's far from the man he was just days ago. The carefree, ever joyful guy that he is was nowhere to be seen right now. Was it because of something she said? Has she gone overboard with the whole bantering with your boss thing? With these questions floating around her mind, she didn't notice that the car has already halted to a stop.

"Is this the right place?" He asked without even looking at her.

"Yeah. Thanks, Mr. Allen."

She's about to get out of the car when he held her arm and said, "Caitlin wait."

"Yes?"

"I just want you to know that I really enjoyed your company. This camping trip has been one of the best I had and I had to admit that I owe it all to you."

"Thanks. But I'll have you know that you made my first camping experience remarkable too. Who knew that my boss could be that crazy at times." For the first time since they headed back, she saw a smile forming on his face.

"I'm glad you had a good time despite me teasing you most of the time." She let out a laugh he hasn't heard for a long time and he couldn't help how it made him feel so warm inside.

"I have to say, you're the first person to ever get on my nerves in record time."

"Sorry about that, really. I think I've crossed a line couple of times back there. Man, I'm such a jerk. Can we just forget this ever happened?"

"No." She said with a straight face.

"But Caitlin-" He said a bit nervously.

"Relax, Barry. It's fine. It's just that I don't think I can forget something as special as that. Besides I don't have much memories to keep anyway." She said as she smiled at him.

"You really think it's special?" He looked at her amused, a sparkle of hope evident in his eyes.

"Yeah, I do. Don't you?" She asked then bit her lower lip, anxious to what he's going to say.

"I do, too. Very much. And Caitlin thanks for taking care of me. It really means a lot." He flashed her a smile that seemed to always make her heart skip a beat and held out a hand to touch one of hers.

"It's nothing. Don't worry about it."

"Guess I'll see you tomorrow at S.T.A.R. Labs?"

"Yeah. I'll see you." He walked to her side of the car and opened the door. Then helped her carry the bags to her front door.

"Thanks. But you really don't have to do that."

"It's okay. It's the least I can do to thank you for changing my clothes." He whispered to her, winked and ran back to the car. Before she can even digest what he just said, he was long gone.

"You're really something, aren't you Barry Allen?"

* * *

 **END OF PART FIVE**

* * *

AN: Sorry this took a little longer than usual. Anyways, thanks for the reviews. Let me know what you think about this one. :)

-A


	6. Chapter 6

Caitlin went inside the house with Barry still invading her thoughts. There was something about him that she couldn't quite put her finger on. The way he acts around her makes her feel that he knew her so well. He even called her by her nickname when he was sick. But then he would always insist that they haven't met before. Her curiosity is eating her up but before she can entertain another thought, she heard a familiar voice calling out to her.

"Who are you with Caitlin?" Ronnie, who has been sitting on the couch in their living room, asked her with a tone she never heard from him before.

"Ronnie? I thought you won't be back until the day after tomorrow. You're supposed to be in a business trip right?"

"Don't change the subject Caitlin. I went home as soon as I got your message. Now, I'm asking you who are you with in that stupid field trip of yours." His glare is so intense, so different from the kind eyes she used to see in him. Seeing this other side of him terrifies her a bit.

"I'm with my boss, okay? And please, it's not a stupid field trip. I thought I made it clear in my message that I have been working on a very important research." She replied with a bit of irritation in her voice. It was so unlike him to call her research like that. He was always so supportive and understanding of her. But now she doesn't know what to make of him anymore. Maybe three years wasn't enough to know someone thoroughly, let alone your own husband.

"Your boss, Barry Allen right? Was it just the two of you? Or there's someone else? Did he do anything to you? Did he tell you-"

"Ronnie! Just calm down okay? Yes, it was just the two of us and no, he didn't do anything to me. What's with you today? I haven't seen you like this before. Did I do something wrong?" Her worried expression didn't go unnoticed by him. But the thought of losing her is so devastating, its consuming him whole.

"No, Caitlin you didn't do anything wrong. It's just that I don't like the idea of you being alone with someone else, especially him. Maybe you should just quit your job at S.T.A.R. Labs." He said as he stood up to face her. If he didn't have that serious expression on his face, she would think that he's just messing with her.

"What? I couldn't possibly do that and you know it. Why do I feel like there's something more to this than what it seems, Ronnie? Is this about Barry? Do you know him? Do _I_ know him?" She knew he had told her that they haven't met before but the nagging feeling at the back of her mind just keeps on coming back and this sudden outburst of her husband only amplifies the curiosity already building up inside her.

"No. It's just that..." He was surprised and a bit relieved to know that Barry decided not to tell Caitlin who he really is. But he couldn't help but feel that maybe this is just a part of Barry's game plan. And whatever that is, he swore he would find out even if that meant paying him a visit sometime. He didn't go through all this trouble just to have it all wasted because of him. He surrendered her once, he won't do it again. Ever.

"It's okay. You can tell me. Just tell me the truth, Ronnie." By this time, he has taken a seat on the couch. She tried to make eye contact but his head where buried in hands, both elbows propped up on his knees.

"The truth is, Cait, the accident made me realize how much you mean to me." He slowly turned his head and faced her. Anger slowly dissipating from his features. She didn't need to know the truth. For him, her life is better this way. And he intended to keep it at that like he has been doing in the last three years. "How I wouldn't have survived a world without you in it. I guess I'm just afraid of losing you again. I'm sorry if I asked you to quit your job."

"Hey, it's okay. I understand." She said as she put a comforting hand on his shoulder. "Just promise me you'll always tell me the truth."

"Yeah, I promise." He said as he hugged her. She would've searched his eyes for the sincerity she needs but for now, she decided to just trust him like she always did from the moment she opened her eyes from the coma.

Little did she know that trusting him is one of the biggest mistakes she has yet to discover.

* * *

The next day Barry went excitedly to S.T.A.R. Labs in hopes of seeing Caitlin in her workspace. But all his hopes went down the drain when he didn't find her there.

"Hey Cisco, have you seen Caitlin yet?"

"Oh yeah about that. She called a little earlier that she won't be coming in today." He answered, not taking his eyes off the machine he's been working on.

"Did she tell you why?" He asked with a bit of worry in his tone. He made sure that she got home safe yesterday and she even told him she'll be at S.T.A.R. Labs today. Did something happen?

"She might have mentioned that she would visit her dad at the hospital." He replied, still busy tinkering with the machine.

"Why? Did something happen to her dad?" He asked as he stood closer to Cisco's worktable.

"Dude, come on!" He exasperatedly answered, throwing his hands up in the air. "You have a secretary for goodness' sake. I'm trying to work here you know."

"Yeah, I totally forgot about that. Thanks Cisco." He said then started to retreat back to his office.

"Wait! Not so fast Barry. Since you've already ruined my concentration, why don't you tell me about your little camping trip with Caitlin?" He asked, raising his eyebrows suggestively.

"What? There's nothing to talk about." He replied, trying to hide the blush creeping up his face. "It's just work. I just helped her gather some medicinal plants, that's all."

"Right, work. Oh look there's Caitlin." He said which made Barry look frantically to the direction he pointed at.

"Wha-where?"

"Got you." He said, smiling devilishly. "So about this crush you've got on Caitlin, when did it start? I mean, she just started working here a month ago and you just met her on the day of the interview, right?"

"Look, Cisco, I don't have a crush on her, okay?"

"Of course you don't. You didn't just barge in here and questioned me nonstop about her. Really, dude? If you want to keep your feelings a secret you should try harder than that."

"Fine, you got me. But you can't tell anyone okay? There's more to this than you can imagine."

"Woah, so something really happened between you two on that trip?" He asked, eyes widening at him.

"What? No! God Cisco, she's married and do you really think I'm that kind of guy?"

"Uhm-"

"You don't have to answer that."

"What do you want me to think here dude? You're not giving me enough details so I'll just have to be creative. Or maybe I should just ask Caitlin. Women are into details if you didn't know-"

"No! You're not going to do that Cisco. Promise me." He demanded, looking at him sternly.

"Fine, okay. But can you please just tell me what's going on?"

"If I tell you, you won't tell anyone especially Caitlin. Agreed?" When Cisco nodded and dramatically raised his right hand as a sign of his promise, he gave in. "You remember the girl I've told you before?"

"The one you reestablished S.T.A.R. Labs for?"

"The one and only. Well, she..she's Caitlin." He breathe out a sigh of relief.

Cisco just opened and closed his mouth several times, not knowing how to react to what he just said.

"Woah dude, that's just-I mean-it's like you've been trapped inside a soap opera."

"Yeah, I know. Caitlin and I, we've been through a lot. It just sucks that maybe this is how our story will end."

"Who says it needs to end like this? I know you, you're way too cheesy to let this end just like that."

"What do you want me to do, Cisco? She's married and she seems happy. That's all I ever wanted her to be. Even if that meant she'll never know who I was to her."

"But she needs to know the truth Barry. She needs to know how much you loved her then and how you never stopped loving her until now. And who knows? She might even leave her husband just for you." He said as he smiled slyly at him.

Barry gave him a look and sighed before saying, "As much as I want that to happen, I won't do it. Caitlin needs time to find herself and that's what I'm going to give her. She doesn't need to deal with this kind of complication right now."

"So what? You're just gonna stand there and wait until her memories would come back? Are you for real dude?"

"This isn't about me Cisco. And no, I'm not gonna stand here and do nothing. I'll help bring her memories back to her. It's the least I could do for now."

"And I'm going to help you. I know I've read an article about amnesia. All we need to do is expose her to something that would trigger her mind. Something she has a strong connection with. Like an important event or a remarkable place or someone that has been really special to her, like you." He stated like he just discovered the greatest treasure of all.

"You really think it could work?" He asked him with much enthusiasm.

"Yeah. If it doesn't then we could just hit her head again. Hard. That's the most effective way I know."

"What Cisco-"

"Relax, dude. I'm just messing with you. But seriously, I'm really hoping that you two will find a way back into each other. I'll take care of her husband if I have to."

"Thanks Cisco, for everything. Except for the husband thing I don't think that's necessary." He said as he tapped his shoulder and went on his way back to his office.

"I have my ways you know!" He screamed after him.

* * *

Caitlin arrived at the hospital where her father has been confined for the last three weeks.

"Hello dad, how are you feeling today?" She asked as she took a seat beside her dad's bed and held his hand.

"The usual. How's the business going?"

"The business is fine dad. Ronnie has been taking good care of it. You know you should really think more about your health than our business."

"I just need to know that you're financially stable when I'm gone. It's the least I could do for you."

"Dad, don't talk like that. I promised I would find you a cure, didn't I? So you just have to hang in there okay?"

"What did I do to deserve a daughter like you, Caitlin? I've been nothing but a cruel father to you."

"What are you talking about dad? You've been a good father to me ever since I woke up from the coma. You and Ronnie had been there for me since."

"Speaking of Ronnie, how is he treating you?"

"Actually, that's the reason why I visited you today Dad." She said, her eyes downcast.

"Did he hurt you? Tell me Caitlin."

"No Dad, that's not it. We just had a bit of misunderstanding yesterday and he acted so differently from the man I thought he was. There's a mix of dread and anger in his eyes that I haven't seen before. And I couldn't help but think that he's keeping something from me. Do you happen to have an idea about it Dad?"

"He hasn't mentioned anything about not telling you some things. Can you tell me what was the reason for his sudden outburst?"

"Right, of course. I went to this trip for a few days with my boss to get samples for the research I've been working on. When I got home, he asked me who I'm with and I told him who. After that, he's been acting strange but then he just told me he's just afraid of losing me. I understood that but I can't help but think he's not telling me the entire truth. Was it wrong for me to doubt my own husband, Dad?"

"Caitlin, it's normal to feel like that from time to time. But you have to settle this if you want to make your marriage work. Your relationship has to be based on love and trust, don't you have that Caitlin?"

"Would it be cruel of me if I'd say I don't?" Her own words felt so foreign to her. They've been together for three years plus the previous years she had no recollection of but why does she feel like he isn't the man she's supposed to love? And why is she having doubts just now? Deep down she knew the answers to her questions but she's just afraid of admitting it even to herself. Because admitting it would mean accepting it. And she can't accept that. She can't accept the fact the she's been almost fine for the last three years of her life until he came barging into her system, making her doubt all the things she was told to be true.

"What do you mean by that Caitlin?"

"I don't know anymore Dad. These past three years of my life, I did nothing but believe all that you and Ronnie said. You built a definition of myself in those years. And I would've been fine with that if it wasn't for the nightmares I'm having at night, for the nagging feeling that there's more to who I am than what you made me believe, for the sudden headaches that are a constant reminder of what I had lost. They're always there and I think it's time I stop ignoring them. I know you told me before that I should just forget the past and move on with my life but I just couldn't do it. It's like living like an empty shell just waiting for where the wind might take me next. I can't live like that anymore Dad. So please, tell me everything there is to know."

Her eyes were pleading his and it pains him to know how much he has ruined his daughter's life. He thought that if he could give her a good life at the cost of her past, she would be happy and contented. But not everything he believed to be is true and he had to learn that the hard way.

"Why are you asking me this now, Caitlin?"

"You might hate me for what I'm going to say but it's the truth. I met a guy, he's actually my boss, the one I told Ronnie about and I don't know Dad but there's something about him. Something so familiar yet foreign. I have a strong feeling that I knew him before but he insists that I don't. I know it's crazy Dad but when I'm with him, I don't feel so empty anymore. He made me smile so effortlessly with the little time we shared together. And I just couldn't deny how my whole being would respond to every action he makes. Like my body remembers him but my mind does not."

"Who is he?" There was something in his daughter's eyes that he hasn't seen ever since the accident. A sparkle that were absent for so long he has almost forgotten how beautiful it looked on her. Whoever this guy she's taking about, he clearly makes her happy.

"His name is Barry, Barry Allen." His expression is a mixture of shock and disbelief. The very person he swore to not exist in his daughter's life is now coming back to haunt him. Maybe this is the universe' way of telling him how wrong he was, how he should've just let them be before. He blamed Barry for every single mischief that his daughter has gone through when the only person responsible for all of that is him. If he had just accepted him before, Caitlin wouldn't have had that accident. She would've been happy and complete. In his attempt of not losing his daughter, he ended up doing just that and more.

"Dad, are you okay? You seem a little pale. Maybe I should call the doctor."

"No, it's okay. I just need a little rest. Can we just continue this conversation some other time?"

"Yeah, of course. Get some rest, okay?" She said and went to open the door.

"Caitlin."

"Yes, Dad?"

"Always remember that everything I did, I did it for you."

"I know, Dad. I'll see you soon, okay?"

He just nodded as kept his eyes on the closing door. If Caitlin would know the truth about everything, he's sure she won't be able to forgive him. Not that he deserved her forgiveness in the first place. There's a reason why Barry had come back to his daughter's life and maybe this is his chance to make things right, to pay for the cruel things he's done in the past. Funny how he needed to be in a death bed just to realize all that.

"Forgive me for everything Caitlin. I just wish I can fix all this before it's too late."

* * *

 **END OF PART SIX**


	7. Chapter 7

For days, the weight of her previous conversations with Ronnie and her dad still lingers on her mind like a puzzle wanting to be solved. But it wasn't doing her any good to just contemplate about it all day. So instead she just directs all her attention to work. Besides her work is the only constant in her life nowadays. She went in early today only to be surprised when she saw a single rose on top of her worktable with an envelope beside it. She knew there were only a couple of employees at this time but she wasn't really familiar with them so she just decided to pay Cisco a visit in hopes that he knows who gave these to her.

"Hey Cisco, do you happen to know where did this come from?" She said as she entered the cortex and spotted Cisco in a corner.

"What's that?" He replied as he wiggled a finger towards the letter on Caitlin's hand.

"I'm not exactly sure but I think it's a love letter." She said, a crease forming on her forehead.

"Oh my gosh, looks like you've got a secret admirer Caitlin! Come on let me look at it." He said excitingly, trying to snatch the letter away from Caitlin's hand.

"What? That's absurd Cisco. I can't have a secret admirer. Did you and anyone else here forget that I'm married?"

"Please, Caitlin. The world is different nowadays. _People_ are different nowadays. And maybe your secret admirer is into extramarital affairs-" She shot him a glare which he swore could kill a thousand men. "And now I regret saying that. Have you read it yet? Maybe you can a find a clue to who it came from."

"I did actually. There's nothing different about it except for the lightning bolt at the end of the letter. What do you think that's for?"

"I maybe a genius and everything Caitlin but that's beyond me. I just can't magically vibe where things come from you know."

"Fine. I guess I'm just gonna get back to work." She started to retreat to her office when she remembered to ask him something. She turned around and asked, "By the way Cisco, have you seen Barry yet?"

"Nope. Not yet. Why are you looking for him anyway?" He asked her with a mischievous smile on his face.

"Nothing. I just-"

"Miss him? It's okay Caitlin I won't tell him."

"What? No! I just wanted to ask him if he received my notice for being absent the other day."

"Right." He replied with a knowing look. "Tell me Caitlin, what do you think of Barry?" He guided Caitlin to take a seat beside him while he put both of his hands on his cheeks waiting for her answer.

"Nothing. I mean he's a good friend, that's all.

"Just a friend? Nothing special about him? Answer this, if you're single right now, would you consider-I don't know-falling in love with him?" He asked like the gossip girl he sometimes is.

"What?! Cisco don't you think that's-"

"Over the top? Okay, falling in love maybe a bit too much. How about, finding him attractive? Or having a crush on him? I don't know which one you'd prefer but either would be fine-"

"Cisco! I-I mean he's...I don't know. He makes me smile but at the same time he makes me want to strangle him. Why are we talking about this again?" She asked him, confused to where all these questions are coming from.

"Nothing at all. Just never mind me. You know how curious I can be at times." He let out a nervous laugh under her scrutinizing gaze. "Maybe I should just go back to work."

"Yeah, okay." As she made her way to her office, she thought about what Cisco has just asked. Could she possibly develop feelings for him? Since she met him, he's been occupying the majority of her thoughts more than she'd like to admit. She knew he was trouble since the beginning. But maybe he's that kind of trouble she would want to lose herself into.

* * *

"I was starting to think that you would never show up." He heard him say when he spotted him at a secluded part of the bar where he asked him to meet up.

"The only reason why I even considered seeing you is because of her. Now tell me what you want. I don't have all day."

"Oh yeah. I almost forgot. You were not the same dirt poor, pathetic guy you were back then, huh Barry? What with your successful career and all, I must say you have impressed me." He said with so much mockery in his voice Barry could barely recognize how much of a good guy he was before.

"I don't need your approval or anything for that matter, Ronnie. But I can say that I'm not the only one who has changed. You're supposed to be the kindhearted man Caitlin believed you to be. Whatever happened to you?" He asked him with so much disbelief in his eyes.

"I think you already know the answer to that. Watching her almost lifeless just because I let her go to be with you is still the greatest mistake I've ever made and I couldn't let a day go by without regretting it. That's why I asked to you to meet me here today. I need you to stay away from her Barry." There was something threatening in his voice but Barry seemed to be unfazed by it.

"And why would I do that?" He knew where Ronnie is coming from but he just can't bear the thought of leaving her again. These past three years were the worst of his life and there's no way he would ever want to live without her again.

"Because if you don't, I'm gonna ask her to leave this city and live to a place where you will never find us."

"And do you think she would agree to that? Caitlin is not an object you can own Ronnie. She's a person capable of making her own decisions and you should respect that. Right now, she needs to find herself and you should be the one helping her to do that. If you truly love her, she and her well-being should be your top priority. But clearly you weren't thinking of that, huh? You were too caught up obsessing about your own happiness you've forgotten about hers."

"Don't talk like you know everything because you don't. You're not here for the last couple of years and yet you had the guts to tell me what I should and should not do. I don't know why you decided not to tell her who you really are but I'm not taking any chances here Barry. I'm still her husband, don't you ever forget that." Ronnie said as he leaned closer to Barry, staring him down.

"Exactly. So there's nothing to be afraid of, right? Unless you're scared that she'll leave you again for me the moment her memories come back." He knew he shouldn't have said that but Ronnie needs to be shaken out of his own paranoia. He needed him to be the ideal guy Caitlin needs him to be. Because if not, he might just consider stealing her away from him.

A punch or two made Barry stumbling down a couple of tables from where they stood. He knew he asked for it so he didn't intend to fight him back. He just tried his best to dodge his hits until Ronnie came back to his senses again.

"Take that back you bastard! She loves me and there's no way I will let you have her." He said as he held Barry by the collar. After letting out a deep breath, he released him.

"I know you don't trust me Ronnie but I'll have you know that I'm not that kind of guy. Yes, I still love her but I can never be the man who would ruin a relationship for his own sake. But if you happen to hurt her, even for once, I might just change my mind. And if you're so afraid of losing her, then don't give her a reason to leave you. Be the man she needs you to be." With that, Barry went out of the bar leaving a baffled Ronnie behind. He hopes that his words made sense to him, even just for Caitlin's sake.

* * *

Barry headed to S.T.A.R. Labs to finish the paperwork he left earlier to meet up with Ronnie. His mind drifted off to his request to stay away from Caitlin. He knew he couldn't possibly do it but he can't help but think that maybe that was for the best. Caitlin seemed fine with how her life turned out and who was he to take that from her. Maybe losing her memories wasn't that bad after all. But if he just happen to know how hard it is for her right now, how miserable she's turning out to be, he wouldn't have even entertained that thought in his mind.

It's getting late so he expects that there will be no one at the lab anymore. So he was surprised whe he saw the light from her office is still on. Deciding to check up on her before retreating to his office, he slowly went inside her workspace.

"Caitlin? What are you still doing here?"

She must've sensed him coming because she seemed unsurprised by his sudden appearance.

"I was just uh...finishing some reports." She said without looking up from her computer. A part of what she said was true but the main reason why she didn't leave is because she didn't want to deal with her problems yet. Immersing herself to work is one of the ways she found effective when she needed to focus on anything but her issues.

"It's getting late. You should go home and rest." He said as he walked closer to her.

"It's fine. I can manage. Besides there's just a few more to encode." She replied, eyes still glued to the monitor.

"I'm serious Caitlin. You looked tired. Go home. That's an order from your boss." That must've captured her attention because the moment he uttered those words, her eyes flew up to him.

"And you really have to use the boss card huh? I must say you-oh my gosh Barry! What happened to your face?" She said then stood up from her chair to examine him.

"Caitlin I thought you already knew how handsome I am so there's no need for you to act so surprised." He smiled at his own attempt at a joke.

"This isn't the right time for your jokes Barry. Come on, let's go to the med bay. I'll treat your wounds." She said and took his arm and dragged him to sit down on the bed. Then she went to get some medical supplies and started dressing his wounds.

"There's no need to this you know." He said as he watched her face distort in the cutest way. One more second he might just have to kiss her.

"I'm the doctor and your the patient now so just shut up and let me do my work. Where did you even get these Barry?" She asked with that adorable crease on her forehead he longed to touch.

"Nowhere. I just happen to stumble to some guy and took a couple of hits." He shrugged as if he was used to this kind of stuff (which he is).

"I didn't know getting into trouble is one of your hobbies, Mr. Allen." He visibly tensed up with the words she just uttered. For it was the same ones he used to hear from her before. She must've noticed because he heard her ask,

"Are you okay, Barry? Did I say something wrong?"

"No. I just remembered something."

"Oh, okay. Just stay here and I'll get some ice for your bruise."

"Thanks." He said as he watched her turn the corner. He closed his eyes as he waited for her return. If only they could stay like this, when no one else matters. Like everything is just the way it was before. He opened his eyes to the cold sensation creeping up his cheek.

"I couldn't find any ice in the stock room so I just borrowed one of Cisco's popsicles. Hope this isn't his favorite one." She smiled down to him while pressing the popsicle into his cheek. Barry couldn't express how much it hurt and how much it made him happy at the same time. Tears were threatening to spill from his eyes and he just wants to hug her right there and then. He covered the hand holding the popsicle with his and the other one coming up to cup her cheek. He leaned on her touch, praying that this moment would trigger something inside of her. He badly needs his Caitlin back.

"Caitlin.." Seeing him like that, with his eyes boring deep into her soul makes something stir inside of her. The familiar feeling she experiences when she's with him is coming back. And she finds herself asking the same question again and again.

"Barry, tell me the truth. Have we-ouch!" She abruptly clutched the side of her head, making the popsicle drop on the floor.

"Caitlin are you okay?" He asked as he put his hands on her shoulders, supporting her.

"I'm fine. It's just...I think I remembered something."

* * *

 **END OF PART SEVEN**

* * *

AN: I might start updating on a weekly basis from now on (once or maybe twice a week). But I'll have you know that your reviews really motivate me to continue writing so thank you all for that.

-A


	8. Chapter 8

" _See you around, slugger!"_

" _Yeah. See you around Cait." He dearly held the popsicle in his hand while watching her jog to the car waiting for her across the park. Then he decided to go after her and called out,_

" _Hey, Cait! It's-"_

* * *

"Caitlin are you okay?" He asked as he put his hands on her shoulders, supporting her.

"I'm fine. It's just...I think I remembered something." She sat on the edge of the bed as she tried her best to digest the sudden flashing of memory into her mind.

Barry occupied the space beside her, a lot of questions bombarding his mind at the same time. What did she remember? Has she remembered him? Them? If so, would she hate him for lying to her? Or more importantly, does her feelings for him came back together with her memories?

"What did you remember, Caitlin? Can you tell me?" He searched for her eyes but they were downcast, hoping he could see something that could give him a clue to what she's going through right now.

After a few moments of silence, she answered him.

"It's my dream." She answered shortly. Barry waited for what she's going to say next but she decided to keep quiet so he had to ask her again.

"What dream, Caitlin? Tell me what's in this dream of yours." He said comfortingly, taking one of her hands in his.

Finally she decided to look him in the eye and gave an exasperated sigh before saying, "Well, okay. You see, ever since the accident I've been having this dream. At first I thought it was just that but now I realized it was more than just a dream. It's a memory."

"Of what?"

"I don't know really. Everything happens in a blur. All I know is that I'm in a playground or something. I was about to leave when he called out to me."

"Who's he?"

"That's the funny thing you know. Because whenever he would tell me his name, the dream would be over. Much like what happened earlier when I thought I remembered everything." She let out a humorless chuckle as she shook her head. Seeing the disappointment in her eyes he tried to cheer her up.

"Hey, take it easy okay? I know I would never understand what you're going through right now but Caitlin, don't pressure yourself too much. I believe that somehow your memories will find a way back to you and you just have to be patient until then, alright? Maybe the world is just waiting for the right moment." She gave him a look for his use of the whole _world_ thing but seeing the serious look on his face, she just decided to agree with him.

"Sometimes I feel like the world wouldn't want me to remember. No matter what I do I still end up with nothing. Like everything is against me, the world and everybody else." Seeing her like that, so defeated and so miserable made him want to tell her everything. He knew it would hurt her but if there's anyone who would come out of this stronger that's her, his Caitlin.

"What do you mean by that? By everybody else?"

"Dad and Ronnie, I feel like there's something they're not telling me. These past three years they've been nothing but supportive of me. And even though they don't give much detail about my past, I thought that it was okay. That _I_ was okay. Everything's fine until..."

Resisting the urge to breakdown and cry, she looked at him as if she already accepted the fact that he's the reason why she started to doubt everything she believed to be true. He came to her life unexpectedly, turning it upside down with just one glance, one caress. She felt a strong connection with him ever since she met him and it just kept on getting stronger every time he's with him. Hell, even her headaches seemed to be triggered by him. It all made sense if it wasn't for the fact that he told her that they've never met before. So whoever that guy from her memory is, that's not him. But who is he? Ronnie never mentioned anything about a playground. Well, he never mentions anything unless she asks him. But now she needed to find answers and she has to stay strong in order to do that.

"Until what?" His curious and concerned look made her want to stay a little longer. But spending time with him makes her want to doubt what he said about them not having met before. All she's certain of now is if she gained her memories back, she'll know everything. And that includes whether Barry is lying to her or not.

"Nothing. Look Barry, I'm sorry I told you all of this. I shouldn't have burdened you with my own problems. I-I think I should go. My husband must be waiting for me at home." She abruptly stood up, wiping some tears that managed to spill from her eyes.

Before he could utter another word, she was gone. That moment, there's nothing he wanted to do but go after her, take her into his arms and never let go. She clearly remembers the first time they met it's just that she doesn't still remember him. And it pains him to see how much she wanted to find pieces of herself through these memories. And if telling her everything is one way to get her memories back, he might consider doing just that.

* * *

The next morning, Caitlin wanted to know if Ronnie is the boy she almost remembered in that certain memory. But at the same time she doesn't want to tell him about it yet. She thought that if she really wanted to know the truth, she would have to take the matter into her own hands. Even if that meant keeping something from her husband.

"Ronnie, can we talk?" She asked as she took the seat beside him on the breakfast table.

"Yeah, sure. What about?" He replied without looking up from the newspaper he's currently reading.

"About us. How did we meet?" Her question made him set aside the newspaper as he looked at her with questioning eyes.

"I told you that before didn't I?"

"I know. I just want to hear it again. Is that too much to ask?" There's a hint of indifference in her eyes that wasn't there before. Although he noticed it, he didn't let her see it in him.

"No, it's not hon." He took her hand comfortingly and said, "We were in highschool back then when my dad took me to one of his business meetings with your dad. I actually didn't want to go then because business is really not my thing but I'm glad I did because I met you, the love if my life." This is the only part of the enormous lie that he left to be true. Everything else is nothing but made up stories he was forced to feed her in the last three years.

"And then what happened?"

"We started dating from then on. I even transferred to the university you went to just to be with you. And a few years later, we got married."

"Didn't you have any past relationships before you met me?"

"None. It's only you, Cait."

"How about me? Did I meet someone before you?" She knew she's being a little more curious than usual but she had to pull this off to find answers to her questions.

"I'm not exactly sure. But based from what you told me on our wedding day, I'm your first and greatest love, Cait. I hope it still stands until today."

She wanted so badly to agree with that but deep down she knows it wouldn't be fair to the both of them. It's hard to wake up one day not knowing who you really are and be forced to believe and trust the people who you don't have a recollection of. But for the sake of the three years they spent together, she said,

"Uhh, yeah of course. I mean...hon, where did we usually go to when we're still dating?"

"There's a lot of places actually. But your favorite place is the Italian restaurant downtown."

"The one where you first took me after I woke up from the coma. It's a lovely place. But haven't we visited somewhere else? Like a playground or something." If that was the first memory she would remember, it means that maybe it's one of the most important events of her life. One that she would take with her until she grows old. The one she would tell her future children and maybe grandchildren about. So if Ronnie really is her first and greatest love, he must've remembered it too.

"None that I could remember." His words rung repeatedly in her mind. If he wasn't that boy, then who is? Why would she even remember someone who wasn't even important to her? Or maybe he is. Maybe he's someone so important to her life that he might just be the key to regaining back her memories. But why has Ronnie or even her father never mentioned about him? Could it be that they don't want her to remember? She was shaken out of her thoughts when she heard Ronnie calling out to her.

"Cait, are you alright? You seem a little distracted."

"No, I'm fine. It's just there is a lot going on at work." She lied so he won't be suspecting that some of her memories came back.

"It's okay. I understand. Maybe you should get some rest. It's your day off after all. I should be going now. See you later, okay?" He said and kissed her cheek before going out of the house.

She looked for answers but instead she was left with a lot more unanswered questions than before. But this time, one thing is for sure. Not everything she believed to be true is real. And there's only one person she could trust after everything that's happened, herself.

* * *

After his conversation with Caitlin, he started to doubt his decision of not telling her the truth. All this time he thought that she's doing alright, that everything goes well with her. But when he saw her like that, desperately wanting to gain back all that was lost to her, his heart clenched. He knew it wouldn't do him any good if he were to decide in his current emotional state. So he decided to heed advice from someone he hasn't seen in a very long time. Bedsides, it's about darn time he speaks to him in person again.

It was a Saturday so he's probably off duty and is relaxing at the safety of his home. Barry took a deep breath before knocking on the door of what used to be his second home for a good couple of years. When he opened the door, he immediately gave him a hug and said,

"I've missed you so much Joe. I hope you still remember what I look like." Joe just chuckled and held him tighter.

"I would've forgotten it if you didn't decide to see me before the fifth year mark." Joe told him, giving him a teasing smile he hasn't seen for years.

"You gave me an expiration date? Come on, Joe. I know you'd still remember me even if I didn't come back twenty or thirty years later." He said when they pulled apart.

"That is if I'm still alive." He chuckled again and tapped his shoulder. "I missed you so much, Bar. Come let's go inside."

When they settled on the couch, Barry noticed that the house is pretty much the same as it was before. Nothing really has changed except for some furnitures and Iris's wedding photos on the walls.

"How's Iris by the way? I haven't seen her since her wedding." He said as he took the picture frame on the coffee table.

"She's doing fine, alright. She's been assigned to another city to be the editor-in-chief of Picture News there. Quite an achievement she got there if you ask me."

"Wow, that's great Joe. It's been her dream since we were kids. I'm glad it finally came true."

"Me, too. Although you've got to visit her sometimes. You owe her a lot of catching up, Bar. You can't imagine how much she bombarded me with questions when we learned that you came back here to reestablish S.T.A.R. Labs. For a minute there I thought she would leave her job just to have a proper interview with you." He laughed at the memory. How he managed to get out of that interrogation alive is still a mystery to him.

"I'm so sorry for that Joe. She must've gone full journalist on you." He said as he joined him in laughter.

"Damn right, she did. You could at least give me the heads up the next time you'd do something like that, okay? I mean you could do a little more than a phone call."

"Believe me Joe, I tried visiting you the moment I went back here. It's just that things turned out to be more complicated than I thought it would be." He ran a hand through his hair and leaned back on one of the arm rests of the couch.

"Why? What happened?" He looked at him worriedly. Barry must be going through a really hard time right now.

"It's Caitlin. She's working for me at S.T.A.R. Labs."

"Isn't that what you planned when you decided to go back here? So why do you look so disappointed son?" He placed a comforting hand on his shoulder as he felt him relaxed a bit.

"Joe she's married and she doesn't know who I am. The accident she had three years ago gave her amnesia. Didn't you hear about it back then?"

"No, I'm afraid not. I'm so sorry to hear that Bar. Her father made sure to keep the news minimal. He went as far as having an all media blackout for that. He even refused to disclose to CCPD after we finished the investigation of her daughter's accident."

"Why would he do that?"

"I honestly don't know son. Maybe it's because of business matters. Even the marriage wasn't announced in public. I wouldn't even know about it if you didn't tell me."

"It's just, I don't know what to do anymore Joe. Everything I did, I did it for her. I almost accepted the fact that we couldn't be together anymore. That as long as she's happy even if it wasn't because of me, then I would be okay with it. But when I saw how devastated she is yesterday, I couldn't help but think that maybe not telling her the truth was a bad idea after all. If that's a way to help her regain her memories, I should've told her sooner."

"Bar, you can't be so sure about that. Her condition is unpredictable. At some point her memories could come back but there's also an equal chance that it won't."

"But I have to try Joe. She wouldn't have that accident if it wasn't for me. If only I was a better man back then she wouldn't be forced to leave me in the first place."

"We both know that's not true. Caitlin loved you for who you were before. Look Bar, there's something I did that I never mentioned to you."

"What is it?"

"When you were in the hospital, I talked to Caitlin. I told her that if she really loves you, she will let you be. I know I shouldn't have asked her that but I can't just stand there and watch you throw your life away for her Barry. So if you want to blame anyone don't blame yourself. Blame me. I'm sorry I haven't told you this before." He said as he looked at him with so much sincerity in his eyes.

"Joe, it's alright. Caitlin made that decision by herself and I know she wouldn't want you to blame yourself for what happened to her. The least we could do for now is to help her remember."

"You're right, Bar. You don't know how proud I am to see what kind of man you turned out to be."

"I owe you a lot for it Joe. Don't forget that."

"I won't. So what are you planning to do now?"

"I'm going to tell her everything."

* * *

 **END OF PART EIGHT**

* * *

 **AN: I'm getting excited because we're almost at the climax of the story. I personally didn't intend for the story to reach this far and I'm surprised as well that I somehow managed to give justice to the original storyline. I hope you're as excited as I am to see what happens next. Let me know what you think of this one (because I really enjoy reading your reviews). Thank you!**

 **-A**


	9. Chapter 9

Barry spent the whole weekend thinking of how he can tell Caitlin everything in such a way that it wouldn't make her feel betrayed. He knew she would have a hard time processing all that he's going to tell her but his decision is firm on what needs to be done. She might be a little upset (well, that's an understatement) about the whole ordeal but he knows that one way or another she'll come around. He just hopes that she won't see him as the one who purposefully ruined her supposedly "happy" life but to see him as the one who cared enough to break her out of the deceitful world they cruelly trapped her in.

He walked in to S.T.A.R. Labs having mixed emotions on what he's about to do. Part of him is happy and excited because this might just be the solution to bringing her memories back while the other part is anxious because if ever he would succeed in bringing back her memories and she still chose to be with her husband as she promised him on their wedding day, then he might just think of raising the white flag. Maybe it was time for him to really move on.

"Hey Cisco, got a sec?" He found him at his workspace, crouched down on what looks like a small microwave oven.

"Do I have to answer that or do you want me to pretend I have time for a little chitchat because I don't."

"Come on man. I'm just going to ask you for a quick favor and I promise I won't bother you for the whole day."

"I don't believe in quick favors especially when they come from you. And I'm pretty sure that helping you out wouldn't increase the probability of making this baby work even just a little bit." He said as he pointed to the machine he's been working on.

"I'm hoping you would say that so I brought you this." He held out a take out bag in front of him and the moment he saw his face visibly transform to that of a five-year-old, he knew he had him.

"Wait, are we talking about cheese fries or just regular fries?"

"Why don't you get it and find out for yourself?"

"Fine. Give me that." He tried to snatch the food from Barry but he didn't let him.

"Not so fast. I need to know first if you would help me. This is really important."

"Alright, fine, I'll help you." He stood from where he was working and took a seat beside Barry who was casually sitting in front of his computer. "So what's this all about?"

"I'm going to tell Caitlin everything today. But I still don't know how to start. Got any ideas?"

"Wow, this is way more serious than I expected. But I'm glad you're considering this now, Barry. As much as I want to help you out on this one, I can't think of how you should do it."

"Really dude? That's the best you can say? I even got you food for this. Come on, there must be something forming in that genius brain of yours. I don't want to mess this up. This is Caitlin we're talking about. So please?"

"Wait...nope, none." For a minute there, a hopeful look flashed on Barry's face but it's gone as fast as it appeared. Seeing how he really looked like he needed help, Cisco said the only sensible thing he could think of that time. "Look Barry, I can give you some stupid advice if you really want to but I won't. The thing is, no one can really give you the answers you need. You know why?"

"Why?"

"Because we don't know Caitlin the way that you do. I know I'm like her super best friend and all-"

"You're not her super best friend-" Cisco glared and held up a finger to silence him.

"As I was saying, I maybe her _closest_ friend and everything but honestly I don't really know her the way that you do. I might not be there to witness how you were like before but based on what you told me, based on how you act around her, I know just how much you are connected to her. And maybe that's what you should do, tell her who she really is by the same way you got to know her before."

"Wow. That's just...wow."

"I know right. Maybe I did end up giving you a good advice." He said, grinning like a cheshire cat.

"Yeah, you did Cisco. Why didn't I think of that? I'll make her know herself in my perspective so that she'll know that I never meant to lie to her."

"Yeah!"

"Or hurt her. I'll let her know how much I care about her and I only did what I did to protect her."

"Yeah!"

"And maybe I'll tell her how I never stopped loving her up until now."

"Yeah! And that we'll get rid of her husband to make way for you!"

"What?"

"What?"

"I thought I made myself clear that we won't do that."

"Well yeah, but just in case-"

"No buts Cisco. Whatever happens today, I'll be prepared for it. And if it comes down to the worst scenario possible then I'll accept it. But for now, wish me luck okay? I'll see you later." He said as he stood up and headed to her office.

"Yeah, go Barry! If you ever change your mind you know where to find me. Let's get rid of him once and for all!"

* * *

Barry took a deep breath before reaching the handle of the door leading to her office. It's now or never so whatever doubts he has, he made sure he had gotten rid of it all.

"Knock, knock." He found her sitting in front of the computer, a crease forming on her forehead due to her concentration. He couldn't help the goofy smile on his face as remembered how it's the same expression she used to wear before.

"Hey, Barry. What are you doing here? I was just about to finish the report if that's what-"

"No, Caitlin. That's not why I came here. I actually want to ask if you... well if you.."

"If I what? I'm kinda busy here as you can see."

"Yeah I can see that. That's why I wanted to ask you out today."

"Wait, let me get this straight. I just told you that I'm busy, which means that I have a ton of things to do and yet you're asking me to go out with you?"

He sheepishly smiled and said, "Yeah?"

"I'm sorry but I have to say no. I have to finish all this paperwork today."

"About that. I'm still your boss so consider this as an urgent matter you have to attend to this instant."

"You know what? If you keep on using that style on me I might as well find another job. At least then I won't have to put up with you all the time."

"Woah Caitlin. You know I wasn't serious about that. I'm just-"

"You're maybe not but I am. Maybe it's time I distance myself from you for good."

"What's that suppose to mean? And where are all these coming from Caitlin? I thought we're okay-"

"Maybe what you thought is wrong. Maybe we're not really okay."

"Wait, is this because of what happened last time? I didn't mean to ask-"

"No! It's not. It's just-"

"It's just what?" He gave her a look and crossed his arms in front of his chest.

"Fine! It's about what happened last time. I shouldn't have told you that. I should've just kept it to myself because now I'm left with more questions than I was before. I know I shouldn't be blaming you for this but things are...things got complicated when I met you. There, I said it. So for the last time Barry, have we met before?"

"I can't answer that."

"What? Why-"

"I can't answer that. Yet. If you really want to know then the more reason why you should come with me today."

"Barry, I don't understand. What does coming with you have to do with my question?"

"You'll know the answer later on. But for now, trust me on this one okay?"

"Okay. But can you at least give me a clue on what are we going to do?"

"Only if you promise me you won't ask questions until after later. And by later I meant way, way later."

"Fine, I get it Barry. So can you tell me now what's this all about?"

"Well Caitlin, I want you to meet someone."

* * *

A couple of minutes later they arrived at Jitters. Barry decided to sit on their usual spot, the one beside the windows.

"So what time are we meeting this...who is it again?"

"I told you Caitlin, no questions. Now what would you like, blueberry cheesecake or red velvet?"

"I can buy my own Barry. You don't have to do this."

"Caitlin just be cool with all this okay? You already agreed to go out with me so you might as well agree to let me buy you stuff."

"I didn't agree okay? You blackmailed me, that's different. And just to be clear, this isn't a date. If you have already forgotten that I have a husband, well I clearly haven't so this-" She gestured a finger between the two of them before continuing, "isn't happening. Never happened and not gonna happen. Ever."

"Wow, Caitlin. I never thought you think of us that way. All this time I thought we were platonic. You know, friends who can hangout with each other without-"

"Okay, stop! That's not what I meant. I just want to make sure that I can sleep with a clean conscience tonight. This is just a friendly date, nothing more nothing less."

"Right so blueberry cheesecake or red velvet?"

After taking a seat to the spot where Barry insisted for them to settle, she can't help but muse about what Barry would tell her. He could've just answered her right away, right? So why is he doing all of this? Maybe she'll just have to be a bit more patient to know the answer. Besides, time flies whenever she's with him so waiting for this day to end isn't going to be a problem.

"One blueberry cheesecake and caramel macchiato for you. And as for me, a freshly brewed americano."

"You didn't order anything to go with your coffee?"

"Nope."

"Why?"

"I'm glad you asked. Have I mentioned before that I wasn't as wealthy as I am today?"

"Yeah. A couple of times."

"Back then I was with someone really special. I know I've mentioned her to you before. And one of the things she couldn't live without is coffee. So I have no choice but to accompany her in here all the time. Not that I'm complaining though. I love spending time with her. It's just that before, I can only afford to pay for my own coffee and of course I don't want her to treat me every time so I always settled for just coffee. But she didn't always agree with me on that so she devised a plan to make me eat without making me feel guilty or something."

"What did she do?"

"Well, she fed me with her food. And sometimes when she's really hungry, she would purposefully order for two and feed me the other one spoon by spoon until the last bite."

"That's very thoughtful of her."

"Yeah. One of the many things I love about her. But then I called her out of it one time but she just shrugged and told me that feeding her boyfriend in public is the most typical way of girlfriends of showing their sweetness to them. And if a have a problem with that then maybe I shouldn't have chosen a sweet girlfriend like her."

"This is just my opinion but feeding someone in public is way too sweet for me. She's just making your hands useless if she feeds you all the time."

Barry let out a hearty laughter at that. If she only knew what other things they've done in public before she wouldn't even count that as sweet.

"What's so funny?"

"Nothing. It's just that, she's a lot like you before we got together. She was never the sweet, touchy feely type of woman. But whenever we're together, she always make exceptions."

"She must be really crazy about you, huh?"

"No. I'm the one crazy about her."

After finishing their food and a whole lot of small talk, Barry decided it's time for them to go to their next destination.

"Ready to go?"

"Wait I thought we're meeting someone here."

"We already did."

"What? Barry no one has approached us ever since we got here."

"I know. Maybe we shouldn't have to see her in the flesh for you to get to know her."

"I don't understand. And who is she?"

"No questions Cait. That's our deal right? Now, come on we have a lot of places to visit."

They headed for his car and a few minutes later, Barry pulled over to one of the places he decided for them to go next.

"Barry what are we doing in a library?"

"Shh, Cait. Keep your voice down. You of all people should know that you can't be loud when inside the library so shush." He said, sitting down on one of the chairs near the bookshelves.

"Do you think I don't know that? That's why I'm wondering why we're here. You're the loudest person I know and I'm not planning to get into trouble if you happen to forget to keep your big mouth shut." She half-screamed half-whispered to him as she took a seat beside him. He didn't seem to listen to her as he pulled out one book from a nearby shelf and literally shove it into her face.

"Barry!"

"Silence please!" The librarian said, sending a glare her way which she later returned but with Barry on the receiving end.

"Do you smell it, Cait?"

"What? You won't even apologize for what you did?"

"I won't because it's necessary. So tell me, do you smell it?"

"Barry I'm not playing games with you anymore okay? Plus, do you think I haven't noticed you've been calling me _Cait_ for sometime now? So if you're still planning to answer my question, now would be the best time. And I might just consider forgetting how you shoved a book on my face."

"Cait just be a little more patient okay? I promised to answer your question and I intended on keeping that so now tell me, do you smell it?"

She let out a groan, reluctantly accepting that Barry being as stubborn as ever, won't give her the satisfaction of an answer until after later so she just decided to put up with him just a bit longer.

"Smell what Barry?"

"The book. She once told me that books have a distinct smell. I think she found it addicting because going to libraries is one of the things she likes to do."

"Books don't have a smell. I think that's absurd."

"That's what I thought too. But still I always find myself accompanying her whenever she goes here even it bores me to death every single time."

"So what makes you stay? I'm sure she'll appreciate not having to deal with your loud mouth for awhile."

"I didn't understand it too at first. But I guess if you really love someone, you'll find yourself loving the same things she does. Plus, I find it amusing watching her face contort in the cutest way when she reads. You know, the way eyebrows knit or the way she quirks her lips or even the she crinkles her nose. Everything." He said as he leaned closer to her, tracing his fingertip on the features of her face.

Caitlin finds herself relaxing at his touch, closing her eyes the moment he made contact. She's about to lose herself with the sensation he gives when she heard him say,

"Cait, let's go. We still have one more place left to visit."

They headed to his car once again and on the way Caitlin couldn't help but ask,

"Hey, Barry?"

"Yeah?"

"Why do you always tell me things about this girl? Is she that important to you?"

"That obvious, huh? You know what Cait, she's my first love and I know she'll be my last. If it wasn't for her then I guess I won't be where I am now. She's the reason why I chose to be a better man."

"But you told me she's gone right? What happened to her?"

"The thing is, Cait. She wasn't really gone. It's just that she...well, she isn't herself anymore."

"What do you mean by that?"

"Look Cait, the reason why I brought you to places where we used to go and told you stories about her is for you to get to know her. I shouldn't be telling you this before our last destination but since it's already here and it seems you can't keep your promise of not asking me, then I might as well tell you." He pulled over in the nearest parking space and took her hand in his.

"Cait, the truth is, you and her-"

He was silenced when her phone rang. She took it from her purse and said,

"I'm sorry but I have to take this. It's from the hospital."

"Okay."

She got out of the car and answered her phone while Barry was left inside, letting out a breath he doesn't know he was holding. When she came back, she looked like she just heard a very bad news.

"Cait, what happened? Are you okay?"

"I don't know. Just take me to the hospital Barry. There's been an emergency."

"What is it?"

"It's my dad. He's..."

* * *

 **END OF PART NINE**

* * *

 **AN: I have one more chapter left before I take a break so I hope you'll enjoy this one and the next. Have a great day everyone!**

 **-A**


	10. Chapter 10

Barry sped up to the hospital as per Caitlin's request. On their way, he could see how nervous she is by the way she's torturing her lower lip. In his attempt to calm her down, he ended up holding her hand until they reach the hospital. As soon as they arrived, Caitlin quickly looked up for the doctor assigned to her father.

"Dr. Johnson, what's his condition? Is he going to be alright?"

"Look Caitlin, we're both doctors here so I know you'll understand that with a condition like this, he won't be getting better anytime soon. I'm going to be honest with you, the cancer has spread all over his body and he's been suffering from multiple organ failures since the past two hours. I'm afraid that it's just a matter of time before, well, before it comes to worst. That's why we immediately called for you to come here."

"I understand. Can I see him now?"

"Of course. I'll leave you to it. Don't hesitate to call me if anything comes up."

"Thank you, doctor."

As soon as the doctor left, Caitlin didn't waste any more time and headed to her father's room. She tried her best to mentally and emotionally prepare herself for the worst but deep down she knows that nothing can ever prepare her for what's going to happen. She shot a look at Barry as they reached the door leading to his room.

"It's okay Caitlin. I'll just wait here outside."

"Thanks Barry. It's just that this…this is very much unexpected."

"I know. Let's just hope for the best, okay Cait?" He walked over to her and gave her hand a comforting squeeze.

"Yeah. Thanks again. I should go now."

After taking a deep breath, Caitlin reached for the handle and opened the door. The sight of her father, looking so tired and defeated, made her heart twist in the most painful way. But she mustered up the courage to draw near to his bedside, occupying the space beside him and took his hand.

"Hi, Dad. How are you feeling?"

He slowly opened his bloodshot eyes to look at her. He somehow managed to give her a weak smile despite of how much pain he might be experiencing at the moment.

"Caitlin, you made it. You don't know how happy you made me by just being here."

"Dad, of course I'll be here. You know I'll always be here for you, right?"

"I know. Have I told you that I'm so lucky to have you as my daughter?"

"Yes Dad, you have. And I won't be ashamed to tell you the same thing."

"No, Caitlin. If you happen to know what I did in the last few years, you won't be saying that to me even in my deathbed."

"Dad, what are you talking about? You've been nothing but a good father to me all these years. I-."

"Caity, I'm glad I had the chance to tell you this before it's too late. What I did, it's unforgiveable and I would understand if you'd hate me even after I'm gone."

"Dad, I don't understand. And please don't talk as if it's going to be the last time-"

"Hear me out, Caitlin. When you were still very young, our company has experienced a great downfall. That time is one of the worst of my life and I wouldn't even be able to get through it if I wasn't thinking about you and your future. As for your mother, she didn't take it so well. She started to change, she wasn't always home and she would always find a reason for us to fight. I tried everything I could to make ends meet so I could give the both of you the life you deserve but whatever I did, nothing seemed to satisfy her. Until one day, she decided to leave us for some other rich businessman who could provide for her way better than I could. I was so devastated back then that's why-"

"That's why you told me she was dead! Dad, don't you think I deserve to know the truth?"

"I do, Caity. Believe me. And up until now, it's one of the things I would forever regret doing."

"One of the things?! What other horrible things you did before that you regretted doing, Dad? Tell me."

"Because of the trauma your mother caused, I changed into this obnoxious man and a much more horrible father to you. I became overprotective of you, controlling your life without even thinking about how you felt. In my mind, I only wanted what's best for you, to make sure you won't ever have to go through the same pain and misery I had. I was so consumed by this terrifying thought of losing you to someone who won't be able to give you the life I wanted you to have that's why when you introduced me to him, I immediately looked him up. And when I learned that he's unworthy to have you, I did everything I could to break you up."

"He? Aren't you pertaining to Ronnie, Dad?"

"No. Ronnie, is the man I want you to end up with. I know he could give you the life you deserve, everything I think you need. I know your desires had always been different from mine but still I insisted on implementing my selfish whims into your life, causing the very thing I'm avoiding to happen. I ruined your life Cait, I ruined you. And you don't have anyone to blame but me. I know I don't have the right to ask you anything but please don't be mad at Ronnie. All the lies, the schemes, it's all me Caitlin."

All this time, Caitlin wanted nothing but to hear the truth but she didn't expect it to be this painful, so excruciatingly hard to believe, to accept. They say the truth shall set you free but why does she feel like she's been held captive, seized by the overwhelming feeling of betrayal. She knew that time wasn't on her father's side anymore and she'll have to forgive him one way or another. But the wound he caused is so deep that she knew it will leave her scarred for life. All she could do for now is to let everything out, hoping that the pain and misery would flow together with the tears streaming down her face.

"I don't know what to feel for you, Dad. All I know is that it hurts, it's hurting too much I'm going numb. How could you lie to me all this time Dad? You took advantage of my condition in hopes of making things right but with what? With another set of your elaborate lies?"

"Believe me Caitlin, everything I did, I did for you. I just want you to live a good and happy life. Be settled with someone who could give you just that. So I thought that if you spend more time with Ronnie, you'll learn to love him. But I was so wrong. You always seem to have your heart set for someone else, even until now. And that was the moment I realized that whatever I do, you'll never find happiness in my own terms. I won't ask for your forgiveness but I want you to know how sorry I am Caitlin."

"Don't you think it's too late for that, Dad? I'm already broken. And there's nothing you can do to fix this. Just tell me one thing. Tell me who he is."

"He's someone who would give everything to you Caitlin. He didn't have much then but the love he has for you could surpass all that I can offer you and more. If only I hadn't been an insufferable pain to him back then then none of this would happen. Please tell him that I'm so sorry for what I did to him, to you."

Those were the last words that came out of his mouth before the deafening sound of a flat line came reverberating through her whole being. She found herself unmoving, surprised that her tears has suddenly stopped from pouring. It's as if she turned into something inhuman. She didn't let herself feel anymore. Not even when the doctors came in and announced the time of death. Not even when they took his lifeless body away from her, signifying that he's no longer there with her.

Her movements were mechanical as she reached for the door handle and went outside just to find Barry waiting patiently for her. He immediately embraced her in a tight hug, whispering comforting words in her ear. She doesn't understand a thing he's saying but she revelled in his embrace, feeling the warmth that's in stark contrast with the cold slowly making its way to the depths in her heart. For a moment she was human again, hurting and in pain. But nothing seemed to matter as long as she's there.

In his arms.

* * *

A week after the funeral, Caitlin received a phone call from their family's lawyer. She thought of it as nothing more than a formality to let her know all the changes that's going to happen since her father died. But what she didn't know is that the information their lawyer is about to disclose to her is more controversial than what she thought it would be.

Controversial enough to bring her over the edge.

"Atty. Richards, come in. It's good to see you again."

"It's always a pleasure to see you, Dr. Snow."

Caitlin led the attorney inside their house and into her office. She's still on leave from work ever since her father passed away which Barry is very much understanding of.

"Caitlin, we don't have to do this now if you're still not ready. There are some sensitive information here that I'm about to disclose to you. I'll understand if you would want to reschedule."

"No attorney, it's alright. I want this done and over with as soon as possible."

"If that's your decision then I'll respect that. I take it that Mr. Snow has already given you a preview of what might be the main subject of our meeting today before he passed away."

"He may have given me a gist of the things he'd done wrong in the past but I didn't know that that would be the main reason for this. I thought we were going to discuss about business matters."

"We're also going to discuss that but there are more important matters that we need to attend to first."

"Important matters like what?"

"His last will and testament. He might have lied to you about a lot of things but he left out one vital information about your life for these past three years. Is Mr. Raymond here?"

"He's not here. Why?"

"Caitlin, I think it's better if you read this yourself. It contains everything you need to know. I also have here a key and the combination to your father's personal vault. It's located at his office in your family's house. As for business matters, you have to sign a couple of contracts and papers for the transfer of ownership of everything that your father owns."

After a long talk with their family's attorney, Caitlin was left with a lot more things to fix and manage. She knew that her father owned a lot of properties and assets to begin with but she didn't know it was _this_ much. She doesn't have a problem with completing all the paperwork but instead she found it as a way to divert her mind from all that has happened. Since she was on leave from work, she was left with a lot of time for herself than she would have liked.

* * *

Ever since her last talk with her father, Caitlin was left with nothing but a wounded heart and the inability to trust the person who never left her side ever since, Ronnie. He told her he was her first love. Her _greatest_ love. These past three years, she always finds herself trying to ignite the feelings she thought she had lost together with her memories. Searching for any indication that they have this undeniable connection that even memory loss could surpass. But no matter how hard she tried, she couldn't feel the spark, the thrilling feel of the electricity that courses through your veins whenever the person you chose to spend the rest of your life with holds you, or looks at you.

And maybe she knew why.

Maybe because she has loved someone else.

She has loved _him_.

Caitlin mustered up the courage to read her father's last will and testament. He has damaged her way beyond what she can imagine so whatever is inside this compilation of neatly arranged papers, she hoped that it won't be as devastating as before. She noticed that there is something more inside the crisp brown envelope their lawyer has left her. It's a formal letter from her father indicating that-

 _That_ -

She couldn't even comprehend it. Couldn't even digest this horrendous scheme that her own father devised to trap her in a bubble of deceit. She felt her life falling apart together with the paper she involuntarily dropped as she no longer have the strength to grasp the truth she has searched for so long. Was this the cost of the ever elusive truth she has longed to find? This agonizing pain is consuming, taking away every piece of humanity she tried so hard to preserve. She wanted to scream her heart out, scream until there's nothing left of her voice.

She finds herself storming out of the house, driving recklessly to the last place she wanted to be especially in this particular situation. But she needs to do this. She needs to keep herself sane. And if screaming and breaking down in front of a tomb is one of the ways to do that then she would painstakingly do it. Just this once she'll let herself be crazy. Be the opposite of everything they thought she should be.

As she reached the very gravestone of her father, she finds herself crying for the first time ever since he died. She wished for it to be tears of longing or regret if she ever felt that she wasn't that good of a daughter to him. But her tears were so different from that. Her tears were of hatred, of misery, a mark indicating that she's no longer her father's Caitlin. He put her up so high only to make her fall be more excruciatingly painful. If she felt like she was just a shell before, now she's nothing but a mere slice of uncertainty. She was left with not even an identity for herself. But she decided it's time for her to create her own, one that's originally herself and not just some character made by the blatant lies of people she thought she could trust.

On that day, Caitlin Snow has died.

And _Caitlin_ _Snow_ has been born.

* * *

As soon as she arrived back at the house, she went to her room to fix her things. She started packing her luggage with clothes and things she needs for her departure. She didn't even thought of saying goodbye to Ronnie. He didn't deserve it. He has taken a lot from her in the last three years and a decent farewell would be too much for her to give. It's getting dark so she knew it's only a matter of time before he comes home. Not that she minded though. Besides there's nothing he can do to stop her. There's no reason for her to stay living in this life made up of atrocious lies.

"Cait, what are you doing?" She ignored him and continued on what she was doing. He took a seat on the edge of the bed and tried to look her in the eye but she's insistent on not paying him any attention."

"Cait, please-"

"Don't call me that, Ronnie. Don't you ever call me that _again_."

"I don't understand Caitlin. What's happening? Don't you think I deserve an explanation for this?"

"How could you, Ronnie?! How dare you think that you deserve to ask anything from me after all that you've done?"

"If this is about what your father told you then we can talk about this. You don't have to this, Cait. You don't have to leave."

"For the last time, don't call me _that_. I really wanted to confront you about it the moment my father died but I don't think I can handle it anymore. He hurt me so much Ronnie and I couldn't believe you were with him behind all these."

"Caitlin, what are you saying? I don't-"

"Please, Ronnie! You've already lost my trust don't make me lose my respect for you as well. I already know everything. Every single one of your lies that you forced me to believe this past three years."

"What-what exactly do you know, Caitlin?"

"Let me start with the fact that we never got married."

* * *

 **END OF PART TEN**

* * *

 **AN: I have to admit that this is one of the most challenging chapters I've written so far but I hope it turned out well. I'll leave you with this one but I'll make sure to come back as soon as I can. I hope you enjoyed reading this chapter. Let me know your thoughts. Thank you!**

 **-A**


	11. Chapter 11

_"What-what exactly do you know, Caitlin?"_

 _"Let me start with the fact that we never got married."_

 _He looked at her with wide eyes, mouth agape as realization dawned on him that the very moment he dread of happening is unfolding right before him. This was it. He knew that eventually he'll have to face the consequences of his actions but he's too blinded by his so-called_ love _to even care. Truth be told, he prayed that this painful truth wouldn't ever have to be known but he knew it would be foolish of him to hold on to that. But what can he say? Love can really drive someone crazy. Crazy enough to believe that he can make her fall in love with him although she always seemed to have set her heart for someone else, with or without memories._

 _"Caitlin... I-"_

 _"Save it. I've been listening to your lies for three years and I think that's more than enough." She started to walk out of the room when he grabbed her arm and looked intently in her eyes._

 _"Just listen to me, please. Even for the last time. I know I don't have the right to ask you of anything but I want you to know that beyond those lies is a single truth. I love you, Cait. I love you too much that I couldn't imagine you having the life less than what you deserve."_

 _She let out a humorless chuckle and spoke with so much mockery in her voice it almost made him flinch._

 _"Of course you know what I deserve. You and my dad, you never respected my humanity. You only saw me as something you can own, something you can manipulate. You claimed the right to rule over what's left of me because what? Because you wanted me to have the life you think I deserve? Is that it?"_

 _"No, Caitlin it's more than that. I love you-"_

 _"Love? How can you even call this_ love _, Ronnie? All these years I've been struggling to convince myself that I married you for that very reason. But no matter what I do, I can't revive that feeling, that overwhelming emotion of being in love. Now I know why. Tell me Ronnie, I never loved you, did I?"_

 _Her words sliced through him repeatedly, making him bleed until there's nothing left to give. Tears were shamelessly flowing down his face as the bitter taste of truth devoured his whole being._

 _"Caitlin, don't. I can't take this. Everything I did, I did it because I love you. The moment you had that accident, I can't help but blame myself for letting you go. I shouldn't have encouraged you to be with him in the first place. So when you survived and had lost your memories, I took that as an opportunity to make things right, to make sure I won't lose you again. But I'm so wrong, Caitlin. I'm a fool to believe that you can ever love me. I'm so sorry for everything. Just tell me what to do to make you forgive me. Anything, please."_

 _He's down on his knees as he clutched her hand tightly, begging for forgiveness he knew he didn't deserve. She withdrew her hand and turned around, taking a few steps before saying,_

 _"I don't know what can you possibly do to deserve my forgiveness. If you were in my situation, maybe you wouldn't want to see me_ everagain _."_

 _Those were the last words he heard from her as he watched how she walked away from him, from the confines of the lies he forcefully tied her with. There's no one to blame for his misery but himself and he has long accepted that fact. He climbed up the bed and revelled at the remaining scent of her. He tried to drown himself to the memories they shared together but his mind kept on coming back to the truth that they never once did it. In those three years, she has only graced him with a simple kiss on the lips, nothing more. You can manipulate anything but the heart, he thought bitterly. And he had to learn that the hard way._

 _As she drove away from the house she treated as her home for the last three years, she couldn't help but feel like she's leaving something that has been a vital part of her being. Something that she held on to when she had lost everything. It's one thing to let the people you trust the most define you with lies but having to find yourself all over again with nothing left of you, even your humanity, is another. She's trapped between the thrilling feel of freedom but at the same time, she couldn't deny the gnawing emptiness settling deep within her._

 _Pulling over outside her family's home, her eyes searched for something that could somehow wake her memories from its slumber. If there's someone who can help her find herself again, that would be no one else but her. She won't make the same mistake of relying on other people to bring herself back. But hasn't she tried that before? She has dug her way into her very being a lot of times before but she can't seem to trigger anything. Despite the pain brought by the truth she recently discovered, still it seemed that it's not enough to bring her memories only time she felt something is when he-_

 _No. It can't be. She has just established to herself never to let anyone else in again, let alone someone who she suspected to be lying to her as well. She made her way inside the huge house and decided to settle to her old room, or what she assumed it to be. She tried to calm herself, seeking for the well-deserved rest she's been missing since her father passed away. She's way beyond weary but her methods seemed futile so she retired to the only option she thought that could help divert her attention away from all she's going through. She went to her father's office to review the papers their attorney had left her. She remembered the key and the combination to his personal vault and didn't waste anymore time and opened it. Inside is the last thing she thought of ever finding there. But she couldn't let herself be surprised anymore. A lot has happened and this should be one of the things that should keep her over the edge except that it didn't. If she was the same woman she is before the storm, then this should have tragically killed her again but she's not anymore. Still, it kept her thinking. Was this the answer she's been looking for? Would it be worth it to suddenly break her newly established rules? Because inside the vault is a file of papers, a box of little things she couldn't quite figure out what for, pictures of what she assumed to be where her memories lie, all neatly labeled with the words,_

 _'_ _ **Barry Allen'**_

* * *

"I never thought that the CEO had a daughter like this."

"I never knew he had a daughter. He's always been very secretive when it comes to personal matters."

"He's a strict man, business-minded. We all know he's not the type to talk about things like this especially inside this building."

"Enough about him, the man passed away for goodness' sake. His daughter is taking over now, we should be paying attention to her."

"I've heard she's a doctor, very smart but has never experienced handling a company as enormous as this."

"That could be a problem. But I'm sure the advisers will take care of it."

"But she's very young. Can she really handle the pressure that comes from managing this corporation?"

"If she's really her father's daughter I'm sure she can."

"She is alright. Actually a bit more than that. I heard she's giving Secretary Jones a more difficult time than her father did."

"Impossible! No one can be as harsh as Mr. Snow."

"Yeah, well except maybe for his own daughter."

"It runs in the family. Suits their surname Snow for being so cold-"

"Shh. Here she comes."

The main auditorium fell silent and the only remaining sound left to hear is the clicking of the heels coming from none other than the sole heir of Snow Corporation. Wearing a knee-length blood red dress with matching black stilettos, she looks like she's ready for the kill. Maybe because she is. She stood proudly before the podium, eyeing each and everyone of the employees with a stare that could bore into their very souls. She tapped on the microphone twice, before speaking with a tone that's unfamiliar even for her.

"Thank you all for coming here today. As everyone of you know, the late CEO has entrusted me with everything he's left behind including this company. Three months have passed since I first gave you the notice through Secretary Jones and it's only fitting for me to expect that each of you has already accomplished the task I specifically assigned. Starting today, Snow Corporation would be going through a drastic change from the most minimal transactions up to the biggest business negotiations so if you still have unfinished matters with regards to the previous activities of the company, make sure to have it carried out by the end of the day."

Several reactions filled up the auditorium, most of which are whispers of disapproval. Everyone seemed very reluctant of the change they're about to face and it didn't help that they don't have an ounce of trust for the woman standing in front of them.

"With all due respect, Ms. Snow-"

"It's Dr. Snow."

"Dr. Snow, I understand that you are now the rightful owner of this company but you just can't expect us to accomplish everything in just one day. We-"

"I can still remember clearly that I've given you all a three-month notice before this very day. And if you can't accomplish a very simple task before the deadline I gave then I don't think you're competent enough to meet the expectations of the new management. Feel free to send in your resignation letters if you can't handle the pressure brought by the change I'm about to implement. I held this meeting for the sole purpose of giving everyone a chance to assess whether you can still find a place under my administration. That would be all. Meeting is adjourned."

She made her departure the same way she arrived, with everyone's attention directed solely to her every move. Looking straight ahead, she made her way to the double doors of the main auditorium, her secretary following closely behind.

"What's my schedule after this?"

"There has been some changes with regards to your schedule for today ma'am. Since the meeting ended earlier than expected, you'll have a couple of hours vacant before your next appointment."

"Okay. Just notify me thirty minutes before that."

"Of course, Dr. Snow."

* * *

 _"Nothing is so painful to the human mind as a great and sudden change." -Mary Shelley, Frankenstein_

She couldn't help but agree as her eyes darted to the framed quote along the hall to her office. It's only been three months since her life drastically changed, literally fell apart. Her father died and left her with not only a grieving heart but also a terrible truth that ripped a hole into her being. The marriage which she convinced herself to believe in for so long, turned out to be a part of the huge scheme devised by her own father and the man who claimed to have _loved_ her. Not only that, she also found out that her suspicions toward her former employer were true. Everyone seemed to have contributed to making her feel so much misery and pain to the point where she almost stopped feeling. She wonders how she managed to get through all of it without losing her mind, without breaking down. Maybe it's because she wasn't the same person anymore, the one who still have some humanity left. Because if she did, she knows for sure she wouldn't be able to handle the pain. So forgive her if she chose to be someone incapable of feeling, of hurting, of caring for what other people might say. It's the only way she knows how not to lose herself completely. Was it too much for someone to sacrifice her humanity for the sake of her sanity? Maybe, or maybe not. But for the time being, she'll resolve to being like this.

Distant.

Withdrawn.

Aloof.

 _Cold._

She thinks whether her past self would actually end up being like this. After she has learned everything, she knew that she's someone capable of loving unconditionally. He made that possible. As much as she wants to lose herself with the idea of feeling the way she did before, she just can't. She wasn't that person anymore, she never was. She's still struggling to find herself in those three years but when she was forced to accept the truth she wanted for so long, she felt like she lost the identity she never had. And the hollowness is indescribable it's almost suffocating _._

"Dr. Snow, it's almost time for your next appointment. You're expected to be at the executive lounge in thirty."

"I'll be there in a few."

"Just call me if you need anything ma'am."

As soon as her secretary left, she took the time to review the proposal for her upcoming appointment. She had to admit that taking over an enormous company such as this is not an easy task especially when it happened very suddenly. She only had three months to be mentally and physically prepared for this but instead of seeing this as a problem, she took this as a diversion from everything she had to endure recently. She has learned a lot but there are still a ton of knowledge to acquire in order to lead this company to the way she desired for it to take. It's a good thing that her intelligence is somehow above that of the average people have and studying about how the corporate world works would be simple for her. Besides, she had double majored in college and got her doctoral degree in just two years. So this is nothing but a piece of cake for someone like her.

Noticing that it's only a matter of minutes before her meeting, she decided to head for the executive lounge five minutes earlier than usual. Her secretary has already informed her that the client would not be able to meet her in person but has assigned someone to take his place. She would normally cancel the meeting whenever this happens for she doesn't like wasting her time talking to some proxy only for them to ask for a reschedule simply because they couldn't handle her presence for more than five minutes. She was about to retire back to her office when her secretary notified her that the client's representative has just arrived. As the door swung open, she was met by the person she's been avoiding for the last three months. With the smug look on his face and a proud smile lingering his features, she couldn't help but think that this is just one of his schemes. And if he thinks that this gesture would ever change her mind, he better be prepared to be disappointed because it won't.

"Dr. Caitlin Snow. I finally got a hold of you."

"Mr. Barry Allen. What brings you at my company? Knowing your establishment's background, I assume you're not here for a merger?"

"A merger would be a dream come true. But it's a little too early for that, don't you think? Besides I know you would never settle for a merger. You'd rather claim my company and tear it down until there's nothing left of it. Isn't that right, Dr. Snow?"

"You're a visionary, I like it. But if you're not here to hand over your company then what exactly are you here for? I'm afraid I don't have time for some _catching up_."

"Actually, I needed to make an investment."

"Ah, I see. Where would you specifically want to invest, Mr. Allen?"

"In you. I would want to invest in you, Dr. Snow."

* * *

 **END OF PART ELEVEN**


	12. Chapter 12

' _ **Barry Allen'**_

 _Dear Caitlin,_

 _The first time I saw you, I knew I was done for. I never believed in angels but you made me think otherwise. You have a smile that could light up a room and a laugh that makes everything feel so light. And your eyes, oh your eyes, it's something that I could stare at for the rest of my life. I hope you don't mind me writing you these letters. It's just that my heart won't let me rest until you know how much I admire you._

 _You're the apple of my eye_

 _You're smile is what gets me by_

 _-Your Secret Admirer_

 _Dear Caitlin,_

 _Don't you ever get tired? Because you've been running in my mind since this morning. :) I hope that made you laugh despite how cheesy it may sound. Have I mentioned that your laugh is addictive? It's like a melody I'd never get tired of hearing. I pray that you'll always have a reason to laugh. For you deserve all the happiness that you can get._

 _Your laugh is music to my ears_

 _The reason why my heart is pierced_

 _-Your Secret Admirer_

 _Dear Caitlin,_

 _I've heard you sing for the very first time. A lot of people may not appreciate it but believe me when I say that your voice is something that makes my knees go weak and my heart aflutter._

 _Sing me a song and make me yours_

 _Drown me in tune until I feel no remorse_

 _Soothe my heart with a melody only you can deliver_

 _And I promise that I'll be yours forever_

 _-Your Secret Admirer_

 _There are a lot more letters to read but this is as far as she can go. Tears were streaming down her face as she felt the sincerity that came with each word intricately carved into the parchment paper. She longed for this feeling, the overwhelming sensation that only comes from the thought of having someone love you with everything that they are. She tries hard to remember, forcing herself to be free of restraints and just be herself but she got nothing but a faint pounding in her head._

 _She just can't rely on these and she shouldn't rely on him for he, too, has chosen to lie to her. Was she not deserving of the truth? Were they in the position to rid her of something she needs? Something that's vital to her identity?_

 _The very next day, she went to S.T.A.R. Labs with a firm decision on what needs to be done. It's time for her to stand up on her own, rely solely on herself because she's the only she can trust. If leaving everything including her old self is something that she needs to do to build herself up again, then so be it._

" _Cait? What are you doing here? You still have a week before your leave ends-"_

 _Caitlin entered his office, looking so different from the last time he saw her. There's a hint of sadness in her eyes but it's not only that, there's something more. Something that he's never seen in her before but he couldn't quite determine what._

" _I don't think that's necessary anymore, Mr. Allen. I actually came here to give you this."_

" _A resignation letter? Are you resigning, Cait?"_

" _That's what it says there, right? If you'll excuse me, I have more important things to attend to." She started walking away but he rushed to her and grabbed her arm, making her look at him._

" _But why? You can't just leave-"_

" _You have nothing to worry about. I made sure that I didn't leave anything unfinished before I thought of resigning."_

" _Why so sudden? I understand that you need time to recover from your loss but you don't have to leave. Please, Cait."_

" _My reasons are personal, Mr. Allen and even if you're my boss I don't think you have the right to ask me to disclose that to you."_

" _I'm not asking you as your boss. I'm asking you as a friend. I care about you, Cait-"_

" _A friend, really? Tell me Barry, all this time do you only see me as a friend?"_

" _I don't understand. What do you mean-"_

" _I already know who you are Barry. Now, answer my question. Am I the woman who you re-established S.T.A.R Labs for? The girl you can't stop talking about? The one that you love until now?"_

" _Caitlin, I…yes. Yes, you are."_

" _Did it do you any good? Lying to me all this time?"_

" _I never meant to lie to you, Cait. Believe me I-"_

" _I asked you several times Barry. I asked you so many times because I thought I could trust you. Ever since you came into my life, I've been feeling something. It's like my body's telling me that I know you, that you're someone important from my past but you always insist that you're not. Why did you do it, Barry? Why make me feel miserable more than I already am?"_

" _Caitlin, I told you it was never my intention to lie to you. I never meant to hurt you-"_

" _But you already did. So much for making me believe that you love me-"_

" _What was I supposed to say, Caitlin? Yes, I came back here for you, to fulfil the promise I once made. I chose to stay away from you because I wanted, no, I needed to be a better version of myself, to be worthy of you in your father's eyes. I painstakingly lived those dreadful three years away from you because that's how much I love you, Cait. I only want what's best for you I have long forgotten about myself. You're the only one who mattered to me then and you're the only one who mattered to me now."_

" _But why didn't you tell me, Barry? Why did you choose to lie like everybody else?"_

" _What do you want me to do? Tell you that I still love you? You don't even remember me, Cait._

" _But still-"_

" _What? Should I just steal you away then and tell you that you're supposed to be with me and not with your husband? Do you know how much it broke me when I found out? All the things I've done, all the sacrifices I made were for nothing because I don't have you. But then I told myself that it wasn't about me. As long as you're happy, then I'll be happy. Now, tell me Cait. Should I have done all of that? Just imagine what your reaction would be if-"_

" _Stop! Just stop, please." Tears were streaming down her face at his confession._

" _No. I'm not done yet." He inched dangerously close to her, his hands travelling all over her body as he spoke, "You don't know how I long to touch you, to kiss you, to hold you in my arms just like this. And the heavens forgive me for what I want to do to you right now-"_

 _She silenced him with a kiss._

 _She didn't know why but her whole body is urging her to do it, challenging her to be honest, just for once, if not for herself then for him. The man who would willingly sacrifice himself for her. The man who went through a lot of pain as much as she did. The kiss was anything but gentle, it was rough, like the two of them were fighting for possession but it wasn't like that. They both knew it. If this is what years of deceit, of bottled up emotions, or simply just the need to feel human do to people then they're as privileged to do this as they are now._

 _As he got lost deeper and deeper to the sensation of her lips on his, he let all reason flow with the wind. He didn't care if she's married or if this is just her way to shut him up. All he knew is that her lips are as tantalizing as it was before, maybe even more. He's like a man drinking from the oasis in the desert as he took everything she could give and more. He didn't realize that they were moving or that he was moving them until she let out a gasp when the back of her head hit a nearby wall. It's just what he needed to fully invade her mouth, tasting her just like she is to him._

 _As they pulled apart and looked at each other's eyes, neither of them could see regret. They were like telling each other that they deserved it or that it was bound to happen. But still, he knew it was wrong and it would never change the fact that she's still married so he asked her while trying to control his breathing._

" _Cait?" He said while still holding her in place, hands in either side of her waist._

" _Don't. As much as I want this to happen, I can't let it change the reason why I came here." She said as she slowly untangled herself from him. There's something pounding in her head, a string of memory struggling to get out but not quite._

" _What do you mean? If this is about you being married then-"_

" _I'm not." Her back was to him so he didn't see how her lips tremble when she spoke._

" _What?"_

" _I'm not married. It was all a lie."_

" _I don't understand. How can this be possible? Weren't you there when the wedding occurred?"_

" _I'm not. When I woke up from the coma, they told me who I am, more precisely, they told me who I'm supposed to be. To them, I am Caitlin Raymond, former Snow. Graduated as class valedictorian who took a course in bio-engineering. Has set her mind to attain a doctoral degree after she has married the love of her life, the man she only loved, Ronnie Raymond. Was predestined to be the heir of her father's assets and was supposed to live a happy and stable life. That's who I'm supposed to be if you didn't come back and turned my world upside down. That's who I will be if my memories won't come back for good."_

" _They just can't do that to you, Cait."_

" _They just did. And now I'm messed up more than I was before, more than I can ever be. That's why I need to do this, Barry. You need to let me be so I can find myself."_

" _Let me help you, Cait. You don't need to do this alone."_

" _It doesn't work like that. I've learned that the hard way. If I want to do this then I need to do this alone."_

" _Please, Cait. I'm not letting you go. Not again."_

" _You're not. Because I'm not the same person as I was back then. I'm not your Cait anymore, Barry."_

* * *

"Actually, I need to make an investment."

"Ah, I see. Where would you specifically want to invest, Mr. Allen?"

"In you. I would want to invest in you, Dr. Snow."

"Excuse me?"

Caitlin shot a curious brow at him, watching as he slowly made his way towards where she's currently sitting. A smug look still plastered on his face.

"You heard me. I want to invest in you."

"Look Mr. Allen, I don't think we're on the same page here. My time is strictly reserved for business purposes only. I'm afraid I don't have the energy to deal with petty things such as this."

"On the contrary Dr. Snow, this is a business transaction. Inside this envelope is the contract containing the details of my business proposal. Feel free to look at it if you're still interested."

He took the seat opposite her and slid the envelope across the table. Then he leaned backward until his back touch the side of the chair, putting his hands together in front of him. He watched her with a scrutinizing stare, taking in every move she makes.

"This is a blank piece of paper."

"That's right."

"I think I've already given more than enough time and effort to this…foolishness. I would have to ask you to leave, Mr. Allen."

"You won't get rid of me that easily, _Cait_."

"Then I guess I'm just going to leave you here." She stood up from her chair and headed for the door when she felt him grab her by the arms and in one swift movement, she was trapped between him and a nearby wall.

"Not so fast."

"What do you think you're doing?"

"I'm trying to convince you to accept my proposal."

"By using force? My, my, change really is inevitable, isn't it _Barry_?"

"Look Cait, this isn't you. You said you're going to find yourself but I don't think this is the right way of doing it. I understand how difficult things are going for you but you don't have to go through this pain alone. Let me help you."

"You understand nothing. And you certainly don't have a say to who I am. Whatever it is that I decide to do is none of your business. I don't need you to look after me. I'm not a child and I can certainly take responsibility for my actions."

"You're right, I don't. Speaking of taking responsibility for your actions, I hope you haven't forgotten that you still owe me an explanation for what you did last time."

"That's a shame because I can't remember owing you an explanation for whatever it is that I did."

"Why did you kiss me, Cait?" For a minute there, he thought he saw a flash of acknowledgement in her eyes but she quickly disguised it by maintaining her cold façade.

"That's it? You're getting all worked up just because of a stupid kiss?"

"A stupid kiss? That's what it all meant to you?"

"Please, Barry. Don't make me laugh. Now let go of me before I call security."

"I refuse to believe you, Cait."

"That's not my problem anymore."

"Oh, but it will be. Tell me Dr. Snow, if I return the favor right now and convince you that it's more than just a _stupid_ kiss, wouldn't that be a problem on your side?"

"It wouldn't because I won't let you."

"Try me."

She closed her eyes and braced herself, waiting for his next move. She didn't know what she would do if she'll feel his lips against her again. That might be the last thing keeping her from breaking all the walls she carefully built for herself. She took a deep breath, a futile move to calm her senses. Her eyes shot open when she felt his hot breath on her ear, whispering something that would leave her thinking for a while.

"All I'm asking is just one chance. One chance to bring you back your memories, bring you back to yourself. If I fail or if I succeed but you still refuse to let me in your life then just say it and I'll be gone. One chance to make it or break it. I'll be waiting for your answer, Dr. Snow."

He let go of her and departed the room, leaving her breathless and bewildered.

* * *

 **END OF PART TWELVE**


	13. Chapter 13

It's been over two weeks since his conversation with Caitlin but he still hasn't heard from her. With a lot of questions plaguing his mind he's sure he's this close to losing his mind. What was she doing? Does she think of him as much as he thinks of her? And most importantly, how did she take his- _threat_? No, he wasn't that harsh, was he? So, offer maybe? Although that didn't sound so appealing to him, he settled for it at the moment. Besides, he didn't want that to add up to the long list of things that had occupied most of the space in his mind already. He was taken out of his reverie when he heard the door open, revealing an excited-looking Cisco holding up something in his hands.

"This, my friend, is the latest prototype of a weapon that could erase humanity in just one blast." When Barry just raised a disbelieving brow at him, he continued, "Well, okay not the entire humanity but it happen to freeze the foot of a guinea pig. Don't worry, I've already defrosted it right after. Mickey is perfectly fine, he's actually resting in his new cage that I built for him. You know, my way of saying sorry for freezing his foot."

"That's great."

"Really, that was it? Come on, man! What's happening to you?"

"It's Ca-"

"Don't answer that. A best friend like me already knows when his friend is having woman problems. And you, sir, had it real bad."

"You have no idea."

"Barry, she just resigned. She wasn't dead or something so you don't have to sulk or even mourn over her not being around anymore. Believe me, I miss having her around too but do you see me acting like a child just because of that?"

"You always act like a child-"

"Of course not! I've been more productive than ever. And just a piece of advice, you know you could just visit her, right?"

"I already did."

"What? And you didn't even tell me?"

"There's really nothing to say. Don't be surprised but Cait is different now. She's become a bit…cold."

"No way. Caitlin is like the sweetest, caring person I know. There's literally not a chance of her becoming cold. Well, except if you would consider her surname Snow. That would be-"

"I'm not joking around, Cisco. You didn't go through as much pain as she did so you obviously don't have any idea what it can do to you." He replied, a bit irritated. He doesn't get much sleep this days and Cisco being like this isn't helping.

"Woah, okay. Relax dude. I come in peace." He raised both of his hands up in defense, making Barry let out a heavy sigh.

"I'm sorry I didn't mean for it to come out like that. It's just things are really difficult for me now."

"What exactly happened? And how is she? Is she doing alright?"

"I don't know. She seems fine but I told you, she's changed. Apparently, her father's death isn't the only thing she had to deal with right now."

"What do you mean?" He sat in front of his desk, putting a hand under his chin as he leaned on the table. The inner gossip girl in him is quickly surfacing.

"I should probably not tell you this but since she seemed to trust you enough to tell you about her accident, I guess you should know, too."

"I'm all ears."

"Well, you already knew about the amnesia but there's more to it. Her father took advantage of it by filling her with made up details about her identity. And one of those is faking her marriage."

"WHAT?! She's not married? Then what are you doing here sitting all day long? You should be at her place right now doing things that-well, I don't know exactly but you shouldn't be here! Get up and wipe that frown off your face and do something."

"Do you think I haven't done that? I have tried everything just to get in touch with her but she's avoiding me. The only way I had the chance to talk to her is when I pretended to be an investor in her company but it didn't end up well either." He said, sulking in his desk even further.

"What did you do, Barry?" He asked, narrowing his eyes at him.

"What? Why me? If you'd seen the way she almost killed me with her glare you wouldn't even think that."

"Fine. I bet she knew who you are already?"

"Yep."

"What did I she say? Did she flip when she knew how much of a hopeless romantic you are?"

"She did."

"Isn't that great?"

"I wasn't finished yet. She did flip but for different reasons. Apparently, she's so fed up with lies so when she knew that we've met before, well, she took it out on me. And I may have done something to provoke her even more."

"Man, that was totally messed up. You really screwed everything-"

"Okay, I don't need to hear that right now. You're not helping me Cisco."

"Oh but I can. Tell you what, since Cait is my best friend-"

"She's not-"

"Shush. Do you want my help or not?"

"I don't know how you can possibly help me in this situation but yeah sure. Just don't come running back to me if she happen to make you cry."

"Psh. Just watch me. I'm taking the afternoon off!"

With that, he scrambled out of his office and Barry felt a bit scared for him. He clearly doesn't know what he's about to face but knowing Cisco, he knew he enjoyed the thrill of taking on a challenge. A few moments later, he came barrelling to his office again, a confused look plastered on his face.

"Where can I find her again?"

Classic Cisco.

* * *

When Cisco arrived at the place Barry told him about, he realized that he wasn't exaggerating. The building is huge and so modern-looking he felt so small in his statement shirt that he always seemed to be proud of wearing. But right now isn't the time for self-doubt and self-pity because he's a man on a mission. And Cisco Ramon isn't someone who would easily back down from a challenge.

He went straight for the entrance, head held high but he hasn't even stepped beyond the glass door when a pair of strong hands grabbed him by the arms.

"Excuse me sir, but we don't allow uninvited guests and non-employees inside the premises."

"Woah. I'm not just an uninvited guest okay? For your information I know the owner of this enormous institution and I'm sure she'll be more than happy to see me." It's much harder than he thought it would and the death glare coming from a guard with a body that of a bouncer is definitely not making this task any easier.

"Okay, sir. Let me escort you to the information desk just to make sure you had an appointment with Dr. Snow."

"Fine. Let's go then." He confidently said even if he was hyperventilating on the inside. Who knows what this scary-looking guy would do to him if he knew he was just bluffing. He thought of making a run for it but with how big this place is, there would be a great chance of him getting caught first before he could find Caitlin. He maybe a genius but he clearly didn't think this one through.

His internal debate was interrupted when he spotted Caitlin coming through the glass doors. If his rational thinking wasn't working for him then at least it seemed that luck was on his side.

"Caitlin!" He called out to her but she's in deep conversation with a distress employee who's practically on her tail since she made her presence known. He wouldn't deny that she's looking great (a thing he wouldn't even think of telling Barry) but there's something different about her. Is this what Barry meant when he said that Caitlin has gone cold?

"Please Dr. Snow, I've been working here for almost ten years. You just can't fire me."

"Look, it's the board's decision to fire you. Apparently, majority of us doesn't see you as an asset for this company anymore. Don't take this personally."

"Just give me a second chance, please! How about the ten years of service I've given to this company? I'm sure you-"

"I'm afraid I don't have chances to give anymore. You didn't mess up just one time. I've tracked your records and this is the third time you caused a casualty to this company. I don't care if you spent ten years in here. I'm actually wondering how you managed to stay here for that long. Now, I'm asking you to passively make your way out of the building before I call security and have you dragged in the most embarrassing of ways." She shot the employee a venomous smile, turning around to head the other way.

"You heartless bitch! You're going to pay for this! I swear you-"

"What did you just call me? Have you forgotten that you owe this company two million dollars for your exceptional demonstration of incompetence? Utter a single word again and I might just change my mind for letting you go uncharged."

The furious expression of the employee quickly changed to that of utter disbelief with a hint of dread. With a few snaps of Caitlin's finger, the employee was escorted out of the premises.

"Woah. That was totally cool and scary at the same time, Caitlin. Barry wasn't lying when he said that you kind of turned into this cold person, an Ice Queen to be precise."

"Cisco? What are you doing here?"

"Nothing. I just thought maybe we could talk?"

"There's nothing left to talk about." She started walking away, waving him off.

Cisco felt as the hold of the guard tighten around his arm and it made him squeal a bit.

"Caitlin!" Her head whipped back at him and he gestured to the guard beside him, nervousness clearly evident in his features. She let out a frustrated sigh and pinched the bridge of her nose before saying,

"Release him. Send him to my office in thirty."

"Yes! You heard her. I told you I know the owner of this company."

Thirty minutes later, he was brought to a spacy room overlooking the whole city and Cisco being Cisco, did nothing but to touch everything in the room and ended up sticking his face in one of the glass windows.

"Do you know how long it took the concierge to clean that glass window alone?"

"This place is dope, Caitlin! Why didn't you invite me, your very best friend, in here sooner? I'm starting to think that you-"

"Just get to the point, Cisco. I don't have much time for this."

"Okay. First of all, I don't want you to think that Barry sent me here. He actually tried to warn me about going here but I just can't stand seeing him in so much misery. I know you're having a hard time too but please don't take it all out on Barry."

"Are you done?"

"Caitlin please, this isn't you."

"You know what's funny, Cisco? You're not the first person to tell me that. What is it with you people having the audacity of telling me who I should be. Honestly, I'm pretty sick of it."

"Fine. I don't have the right to meddle with your own issues but do you think you have the right to do that to him? If only you can see how much he's being affected by this, how much he's hurting, I bet anyone would take pity on him. That poor guy didn't do anything but to love you, Caitlin. He didn't deserve this and you know that."

"I didn't deserve the lies and betrayal too Cisco and do you see people taking pity on me? No, because unlike him, I don't let others see how much it hurts, how much I'm dying inside everyday. I'm trying so hard to be the person that I am right now not because I want to. It's because I need to. As much as I want to cry, to break down, to feel like a normal human being should, I just can't. I only have a limited strength left in me and forgive me if I choose to use that in keeping this company successful. I can't let the employees be jobless just because I'm emotionally vulnerable."

"But I saw how you fired that girl earlier. I don't understand why you did that. If you really care for your employees then-"

"She's asking for it. Besides, she's causing more liabilities than she contributes to the business and I can't risk the whole company just because I take pity on her. Don't worry she's been taken care of."

"I'm sorry I didn't think of it that way. I thought you're just being-"

"A cold-hearted bitch?"

"Exactly."

For the first time, she let out a chuckle. A real one. Not a sarcastic laugh that seemed to be the only thing capable of getting out of her mouth.

"I don't know what else to do, Cisco. If I don't live up to that, being this cold, I'm afraid I won't be able to keep it all together."

"I perfectly understand that. If I were in your place, I'd totally lose my mind."

"So I guess he told you, huh?"

"Yeah. I hope you don't mind?"

"I really didn't have much choice, did I?"

"Sorry about that. But Caitlin, please hear me out. And please keep your bitch attitude in some other places for a while okay?"

"Fine." She said, rolling her eyes.

"When I first learned about Barry's reason of re-establishing S.T.A.R. Labs, I really thought he has lost his mind. I saw him as this hopeless romantic guy who's still hung up on the idea of ending up someone who he hasn't for three years. And dude, who does that? I mean, no offense but that guy is crazy for you Caitlin. And when he knew that you were married, you should see how willing he is to let you go if that meant you being happy."

"I honestly don't have an idea of what he had gone through."

"Not only that. Do you see the way he looks at you? Man, I can almost see the tears in his eyes and you know I'm not really the cheesy type of person so I guess that's saying something. Oh and remember that time when you-"

"Okay, enough! I'm not having any more of this guilt trip. I get the message Cisco and believe me, it wasn't easy treating him this way. But I needed time to heal, to find myself. I don't think I can deal with him for now."

"We both know that's not entirely true. I know how much he cares about you and I can see that you care about him too. You said you need to find yourself and I'm sure as hell that he's the only one who could help you do that. Stop fighting this, Caitlin. Or I'm going to set him up on a blind date. Barry's quite popular with girls you know. Not as popular as me but you know what I mean."

"You're not gonna do that. And please, Barry's not that popular with girls."

"Really? Then how can you explain the number of girls who exert much effort just to set up an appointment with him? And I'm not talking about business matters here, Caitlin-" When he saw the intensity of the glare she directed at him he quickly said, "-okay I probably should stop talking right now."

The intercom beeped once and the sound of the secretary's voice rang across her office.

"Dr. Snow, it's time for your next appointment. You're expected at the board room in fifteen."

Caitlin pressed a button once and said, "I'll be right there."

"Okay, that's my cue. Remember what I said, Caitlin."

"I'll think about it, Cisco."

"There's really nothing to think about, Cait." He said, giving her a knowing smile. "I should go now. There's this challenge in Big Belly Burger in which you have to eat their jawbreaker in fifteen minutes and then it's free. Awesome, right?"

Cisco made his way out of her office but before he's completely gone, Caitlin called out, "Cisco?"

"Yeah?"

"Thank you."

"Don't mention it. Or maybe you could return the favour and grant me an access to this monster of a building, Caitlin? It'll be totally wicked to have them look at me and know that I'm your bestest friend."

And again, for the first timein months, she smiled. Of all people, she didn't know that Cisco would be the one to talk some sense into her. He must really care about them if he's willing to go all through this trouble despite her being so difficult to deal with right now. There may be a lot of horrible people in this world but she really shouldn't forget the fact that there are good ones too. A fact that she finds difficult to believe but thanks to people like Cisco, she's starting to change her mind.

* * *

Later the night, Caitlin had a staring game with her phone. With how she was forced to act these past few months, having this kind of problem is something she finds ridiculous. _Ridiculously difficult._ She's supposed to be rational, precise and most of all professional. But she would be fooling herself if she thought of this as a business proposal even if he insisted that it should be. It's never about business and they both knew that. So with another five long minutes of contemplating, she reached for her phone and dialed his number. A few rings later, she heard his surprised voice at the other end of the line. Surprised with a hint of excitement?

"Hello?"

"This is Dr. Caitlin Snow."

"Dr. Snow? What a pleasant surprise." She had to roll her eyes at that because even if he tried to sound calm and cool, his voice is literally failing him.

"I thought about your proposal."

"You did?"

"Meet me tomorrow and we'll talk about it. Would that be okay, Mr. Allen?"

"That's more than okay, Cait."

"I'll send you the details later. Goodbye."

"Wait!"

"Yes?"

"Thank you."

"I don't see a reason why you're thanking me."

"Oh course you know, Caity." And she knows, he's smirking. That stupid smirk that made the corner of his eyes crinkle. Okay, that wasn't something she needs to know so well.

"I have to go now."

"Wait!"

"What?" He can just imagine her frustrated look.

"Good night, Cait."

A moment of silence passed and Barry almost thought she already hung up the phone when he heard her say,

"Good night, Barry."

* * *

 **END OF PART THIRTEEN**

* * *

 **AN: Finally! I know their moment was long overdue but I'm so glad I'm done writing all the dramatic part...for now. I just want to say thanks again for all you support and patience with this story. Enjoy!**

 **-A**


	14. Chapter 14

" _So I guess this is me."_

 _She turned around to face him, standing a couple of steps ahead. She's wearing that same bright smile he had clearly remembered that first time he saw her at the playground._

" _Woah, you've gotta be kidding me. This is where you live?"_

 _His eyes went wide as he came face to face with an enormous gate leading to what he assumed to be her house or rather, a mansion. Simple words wouldn't be enough to confine the sight before him, a complete exhibit of wealth and power._

" _Yeah. You don't have to make a big deal out of it you know." She said looking down at her feet, feeling embarrassed with the way his reaction turned out._

" _How can I not make a big deal about this? Caitlin, this is just-wow! I mean, I know your bodyguards and fancy car has to come from somewhere but man, this is so much more than I expected."_

" _Barry, stop. You're making me feel embarrassed."_

" _There's nothing to be embarrassed about, Cait. Aren't you proud with all these?"_

 _He's beaming at her and as much as she doesn't appreciate it when people make a fuss about her status in life, she simply can't feel that towards Barry. There's something different with him, something she finds so rare nowadays. He's just so…genuine. Maybe that's why she feels so comfortable around him. He wasn't someone who would purposefully be friends with her just because she's well-off or with nothing but climbing the social ladder in mind. He's simply him, Barry, once a troublesome eleven-year old kid who turned out to be a 'decent' young man as he now claimed to be, sweet and honest._

" _I don't know. It's just that I'm really not comfortable when people point out my status in life. They make me feel like I should be treated differently. I don't want that."_

 _His gaze quickly turned to her, abandoning the display of extravagance he had been admiring for a while. He examined the beauty before him, eyes downcast, lower lip trapped between her teeth. He suspects that maybe this is one of her telltales, something that he intended to make a mental note of so he would know how to decipher her better in the future._

 _And this expression of uneasiness, he decided, is one of the things he wouldn't want to coax from her again._

" _Oh no, I'm such an idiot. You're probably thinking that I'm one of those people. I don't know if explaining myself would do me any good but-yeah, I'm screwed anyway. So here goes, Cait, I really think you're great and I really want to be friends with you-not because of this, okay?" He's making wild gestures with his hands, pointing towards the manor and his facial expression was a mixture of dread and hope as he continued, "I want to be clear about that. I don't care if you live under a bridge or you own half of this city I just want us to be friends and you're great. Wait, I've said that already-"_

" _Barry, calm down okay?" She took both of his hands in hers, just to stop him from moving too much. "I don't think of you that way. It's actually quite the opposite. What I saw in you is a picture of sincerity and honesty and I must say that I'm really impressed with that. People like you is so hard to find nowadays so I guess I won't let you go that easily."_

 _She flashed him that smile of hers and he knows his face must be as red as a tomato but he didn't try to hide and look away. Instead, he returned her smile and gave her hands a gentle squeeze before saying,_

" _Well, that's a relief. I didn't wait for you this long just to let you slip out of my fingers again." He said, smiling sheepishly._

" _You've been wanting to see me after that one-time encounter in the playground?"_

" _Yes? If that doesn't make me sound like an obsessed stalker."_

" _Of course not." If only he knew that she feels the same, he wouldn't be as embarrassed as he looked right now. And so she says, "Because it would be the same for me, isn't it?"_

" _Wait, you mean you wanted to see me again, too?" His smile too hopeful._

" _Maybe?" She giggled a bit and took her hands from his grasp as she started walking towards the gate. "So, I'll see you tomorrow?"_

" _Yeah."_

" _Bye Barry."_

" _Bye Caitlin. See you tomorrow."_

 _He watched as she slowly retreated inside the huge manor, a smile firmly etched on his face as he started walking away. He's lucky enough that he got to see her again but the possibility that his long-time childhood crush might reciprocate his feelings, well, that's something beyond luck._

* * *

Barry couldn't help but smile, even though a sad one, when he recalled the first time he went here. Nothing has changed much after all those years except that the mansion only looked better. If only their relationship was in par with it then maybe they're living in a place looking like this one, only a bit smaller. He remembered when they would often talk about future things like building their own home and creating their own family. Caitlin would often say that she doesn't want a huge house, like this one where she grew up in, but rather something that's cozy and simple where she can easily locate where their kids have gone. A veranda and a garden would be nice to have too, she would fantasize. He always finds it amusing, how she had given much thought about things that are way beyond a couple of years in the future. But what really unnerves him is the thought that all of her plans included him. It just makes his heart swell, doesn't matter if they're still too young to know what the future has in store for them.

But now, three years into that same future they dreamed about before, he never expected it to be like this. Yes, he knew it wouldn't be an easy journey for them especially with her dad being a huge obstacle among other things but now that he's out of the picture (not that he wished for it or even a bit happy for his passing), there are still things that seem to want to keep them apart. So he started to question whether the universe is really on their side like it was before, when it brought them back to each other, because now he's finding it hard to believe that it still does. Sure, he wasn't a huge fan of destiny or fate but sometimes he felt compelled to blame everything to it because no matter what he does, no matter what he sacrifices, he still ended up with nothing. Nothing because he's not with _her_. They're supposed to be Barry Allen and Caitlin Snow, right?

 _No, not anymore_.

It's a ghost of a whisper. But he heard it all the same. That devilish plea that came from his burned out soul, his sated bones, telling him to stop, to rest.

 _Let her be._ It says. _Think about yourself for once._ It demands. But the big question is, could he?

 _ **No.**_

And the voices died down. He may be tired and worn out, hollow and hurting but he knew he couldn't let go of her, would certainly not in a million years and especially not now when she needed him most. They may be Barry Allen and _Caitlin Snow_ in this particular moment but it's not a problem they wouldn't be able to over come. _It's just another bump in the road_ , the hopeful part of him whispered. And that's all what he needed to pull this one off.

He stopped the car for a second and attended to the machine beside the gate. After a few questions, the gates opened automatically and he drove all the way to the main door, leaving his car for the driver to take. He's greeted by an elderly woman whom he recognized as the Snow's most trusted helper and informed him that Dr. Snow is waiting for him in the study. After thanking her, he immediately went upstairs, didn't even wait for assistance for he knew this house too well. Had sneaked in and out of it for years to be exact.

He smirked at the memory.

* * *

Caitlin has been inside the study the entire morning, contemplating whether her decision was right, weighing her choices and more so, the consequences. It's only been a couple of months since her life literally went upside down, since she broke free from the confines of deceit only to free fall into the more excruciating pain of the truth. She's very well aware that her wounds are still fresh and she dared not pick on them for they may leave scars a lot more than she can afford. She tells herself that she needs time. Time to heal, to find herself. It's like a mantra that she keeps on telling herself until she falls into a restless sleep at night only to repeat the exhausting process the next day. She's so tired of it, feeling a bit more hollow than she already is. She needs something, anything she can hold onto to keep herself from being devoured whole by that void, that state of non-being that nips at her heels, preventing her to take that first step to healing.

And so she asks, how do you fix something that's way beyond repair? Is it even worth trying in the first place? Would you rather, say, settle to find a new one than waste your time hopelessly trying to put the pieces back together?

She almost smiled at her own misery. She swore to herself that she won't let someone in again, won't trust others the same way again and would most definitely not rely on someone who lied to her ever again. But here she was, putting whatever that's left of her on the line. Hoping that leaving the window open for him, although with the slightest crack, she will eventually find pieces of herself. It's not like she has anything left to lose anyway.

She gambles.

And she has placed her bet on him, Barry Allen, the man who has claimed to have loved her then and has never stopped until now.

* * *

A knock or two followed by her permission, Barry let himself inside the room. He spotted her immediately, sitting on the black leather swivel chair behind the huge mahogany desk. A few rays of afternoon light shines across her face, making her look more beautiful than he remembered her to be. The only difference is there's also a hint of pain and sadness in her eyes that he wasn't used to seeing before. And it only fueled his desire to not blow up this rare chance that she has given him.

"Mr. Allen." She called out to him, her face unreadable.

"Dr. Snow." He smiled a bit wider than he's supposed to, still couldn't believe that she's actually giving him a chance, giving _them_ a chance.

"Take a seat."

"Thank you."

"Do you want something? Coffee, tea, anything?"

 _Nothing. Just you._ He bit the inside of his cheek just to prevent himself from blurting it out loud. If he was talking to the old Caitlin, he knew exactly what her reaction would be. She would shy away, trying to hide the blush creeping up her cheeks. That's when he would hold her by the chin, making her see the sincerity in his eyes. A playful smack on the arm would be her initial reply but she'd give him a kiss of appreciation nonetheless. But now, well, heaven knows what she'd do to him if-

"Mr. Allen?"

"Yeah?"

"I asked you if you need anything."

"Ah no, thank you. I'm fine. I'm just surprised that you actually invited me here."

"As I've told you, I thought about your proposal."

"And?"

"I'm willing to negotiate."

"Cait, we both know that this is more than just a business proposal."

"How can you be so sure?" She cocks an eyebrow at him, as if telling him that she wouldn't give in just yet.

"Because we wouldn't be having this conversation _here_ in your _house_ if it was." A crease formed between her brows and he knew he's gotten his point across.

"Alright. But it doesn't mean that you can have your way with all this. I want to establish rules and boundaries."

"Of course. What do you have in mind?"

"You told me that if I would give you a chance, I still have the last say on how things would go, with or without memories right?"

"I said that?" He asked, trying to fake innocence.

"Mr. Allen-"

"Cait, relax. I'm just trying to lighten the mood. And please stop calling me Mr. Allen." His ever goofy smile was countered by her death glare, one that can bore through your soul. But he paid no mind, his stubborn side taking the reigns from his logical one.

"No. As I was saying, I'm only giving you two weeks of my time. After that, we will terminate this...agreement and whatever my decision will be after that time period will no longer be negotiable. Understand?"

"Wait, hold it right there. Two weeks? Cait, I may be brilliant one way or another but I'm not a miracle worker. Two weeks is a very short period of time. How do you expect me to-"

"Mr. Allen, that's not my problem anymore. Two weeks is all I have so take it or leave it."

"How about we settle for three months?"

"Don't make me laugh."

"Okay, two months. That's how low I can go."

"Not happening."

"Cait, you said you're open for negotiations and this wouldn't be one if you keep on saying _no_ to me!" He's standing up now, hands lay flat on the smooth surface of the mahogany and his frame leans toward hers.

"And do you think it would be if you keep on insisting that I say _yes_ to you?!" She mirrored his actions, their faces only inches apart. She may be giving him a chance but the fear of pain is something you can't shake off just like that.

He settled down on his chair again, shoulders slumped as he ran a hand through his already messy hair.

"Ugh, I hate it when you're always right. I hate that I always agree that you're right." He gazed up at her, a fond smile forming on his features.

"Even before?"

She didn't really intend to ask him that. It just came out, like the inner part of her was dying to know who was this girl he fell head over heels in love with. She wondered if she can be that girl again because now she's pretty sure she's not even a bit close to being lovable. She's not even sure if her heart still know what love is.

Pain has numbed her enough, has consumed her entirely it has forgotten to leave a place for love in her cold, _cold heart._

"Caitlin."

She didn't even realize he has moved or that he already rounded the desk to be in front of her, taking both of her hands in his. Her initial reaction is to retreat, hide behind the safety of her walls. But he's so warm, insistent to thaw her frozen heart.

And it did.

Almost.

"Barry..." She turned her face away from him but she didn't try to withdraw her hands again.

"I know it's hard for you to trust anyone again and you're still a long way from being healed but please don't ever think that you're in this alone. You can't go through this alone. I won't let you."

She let out a heavy sigh because she knew he had a point. _Damn right_ , he is. She can't go through this alone but she refuses to let someone in either.

 _Torn_.

She's messed up and complicated but here he was, giving his everything to her even though she knew she didn't deserve even just an ounce of him. So, why? Why put up with her when she's being so difficult to him and everyone else?

"Why are you doing this, Barry? Why waste your time with a cold-hearted woman like me?"

He didn't answer right away although he knew exactly what he was going to say. He didn't know why but her question pained him more than it should. He looked into her eyes and he knew. Maybe because _his Cait_ would never ask him that. Maybe because _his Cait_ already knew the answer so she wouldn't even bother asking him. Maybe because _his Cait_ knew and felt love and what it does to people. His Cait. _His Cait._ _ **His Cait.**_

 _"I'm not your Cait anymore, Barry."_

Her words resurfaced in his mind over and over and he wouldn't want to admit that ever but she was right (she's always right and he knew it). But deep down he believes she's still in there, the Caitlin Snow he knew and loved, still does. So he won't give up, not when she's just at arms reach from him. Not when they've both been through a lot.

"I was hoping you would know the answer to that after you allow me to spend the next three months with you." He smirks at her, challenging her because he knew she wanted to know his answer.

"Barry, you know that's not possible."

She finally withdraws her hands from him and went towards the balcony. Her footsteps heavy as she went and grabbed on the railing with lithe hands. He immediately followed her, refusing to put more distance between them as she was already giving him.

"Why not?"

"I'm not living for myself anymore, Barry. I have a company to run and people to care about, families that needed to be secured. I just can't walk away from all that."

"And I'm not asking you to. We can compromise. I can even help you."

"You don't understand. I can't be distracted more than I already am. It's hard enough to balance everything already and I'm still..."

 _Grieving, in pain._ She wanted so much to say. But she can't display any more weakness than she already did. She can't let herself be weak but she finds it hard to do that when he's around.

"It's okay, I understand. That's why I'm asking you to stop fighting it. Stop wasting your energy pushing people away. Stop pushing me away, Cait. Let me in so I can share your pain."

"It's not that easy." Her grip on the railing tightens, her knuckles turning white. He went behind her and put each of his hands next to her, trapping her with his frame. He knew he just needed the right words and she'll be caving in in no time but then he said,

"Trust me on this one."

That's when he knew he did a poor job in choosing the words because she abruptly turned to him and snapped,

"Trust? That's all I ever did, didn't I? Now look at me, I'm a disaster. How can you possibly think I could ever trust people again? My own father lied to me, the man whom I thought would never hurt me. My supposedly 'husband' betrayed me, the man who claimed that he loved me. What makes you different, Barry? What makes you think that I...that I could make an exception for you? Tell me!"

She's pounding at his chest with every word and it hurt but not as much as it did to his heart. She's right, as always. What made him think he could help her? What made him think he could save her? He felt her tears dampening his shirt as he held her tight. He knew there's nothing he can say that would sound right to her. But is she really looking for the right answer?

 _No, she's not._ She's looking for an honest one.

So he gives it to her.

"Cait."

He put a hand to cup her cheek, wiping her tears away with his thumb. Her eyes are still full of emotions but he knew she just needed to let it all out.

"I'm sorry," she says. It takes him by surprise. If there's anything, he should be the one apologizing.

"Caitlin-"

"No, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have taken out all my frustrations on you. I shouldn't even have thought of inviting you here. I shouldn't even-"

"Cait stop, listen to me. You asked me what makes me different and honestly I don't know. I won't even deny that maybe I'm not. Maybe I'm the same as them, I lied to you. I hurt you. I'm just a man who foolishly thought that I could save you. Then I realized that I can't. I can only be the man who would catch you when you fall, who would hold you when you cry. I can't promise you that there will be no more pain because it's a part of our life and it's always going to be there whether we like it or not. But I can be the man to share the pain with if you let me."

She stared back at him and she can only see sincerity in his eyes. She wanted to give in, heavens help her she does. So what's really stopping her?

"But you don't have to do this. Why are you even doing this?"

"I told you, give me three months and you'll know."

"Barry-"

"Okay, fine. Two months."

"Three weeks."

"Six weeks."

"Three."

"Five?"

"Three."

"Four, pretty please?" He said, putting on his best puppy dog face.

"That's not gonna work-"

"Cait, you assaulted my chest with your fist earlier. Can you just let me win this one?"

She smiled at him, really did and he had to take a closer look to make sure it's really there. His hands are still firmly placed at her waist but she doesn't seem to mind (or hadn't really realized it) and it only took a little movement to put their bodies even closer. Her hands are still on top of his chest when she had gripped his shirt earlier. Then he felt her embrace him back as she whispered another apology into his ear.

"For what? For physical assault?" He joked when she pulled away, trying to lighten the mood.

"For everything. I've been horrible to you this past few months. I'm sorry."

"Everything? Including that-what did you call it again? Ah, _stupid_ kiss."

"I'm not having this conversation with you, Barry." She stepped away from his embrace but he knew she was blushing. Oh how this day turned out to be, he thought.

"Oh Caity, you don't have to be embarrassed-"

"I'm not!"

By the time they finished their "negotiation" it's almost evening. It's still a weekday so Caitlin knew she would have a lot of matter to attend to later.

"Thank you for your time, _Mr. Allen._ "

"You're not gonna invite me for dinner, _Dr. Snow?"_

"Don't push your luck."

"Alright, alright. So when does my four weeks of Caity-time start?"

"I'll let you know as soon as I've cleared my schedule. And don't call it Caity-time. _Ever_." She glared at him and he just put his hands up in defense.

"I guess I should be going now."

"The helper will show you the way out."

"That's unnecessary. Trust me, I know this manor very well." He said and winked at her as if saying, _just like how I know you._

He had a lot of scenarios in mind on how this day would turn out to be but this is just way better than he could've imagined. They're still a long way to what they were like before but at least he's taking the first step and she's letting him.

That's all that matters.

He can't wait to spend that whole month with her. It's just a short amount of time but to him it doesn't matter for he knows that if his plans go according to plan then a month can turn to two then three and-

Four-

-ever.

 _Forever._

* * *

 **END OF PART FOURTEEN**

* * *

 **AN: I want to apologize for updating so late. I have to attend to some important matters last month but here it is. I hope you enjoy this one. I also want to thank you for all the reviews and support this fic is getting. Thank you!**

 **-A**


	15. Chapter 15

"Hi, I'm Caitlin. What's your name?" She beams at him, or tried her best to, as she approached his sitting form in one of the benches in the playground.

He gave her a questioning look, smirked and went back to what was he's supposed to be doing - ignoring her. She let out an exasperated sigh at his reaction and it only made his smirk grow wider.

"Barry-"

"No. Do it again." He shrugged.

A week after they finally arrived at a plausible agreement, Barry was way beyond ecstatic. He couldn't eat, couldn't sleep and couldn't even properly function at work (but it's a good kind of restlessness, he believed). He's starting to think that maybe Caitlin has changed her mind for she hasn't called him yet but Cisco would often tell him to stop worrying and just channel all his pent up energy to managing S.T.A.R. Labs before his impending month-long leave. He knew Cisco had a point and he's a bit more surprised that he didn't even have to bribe him when he asked him to take over the corporation while he's gone. Although he remembered him going nonstop about doing this for both of his best friends and that they shouldn't forget to ask him to be the best man to their wedding after all the drama is over.

He only laughed at Cisco's mention of wedding and gave him a pat on the shoulder for letting him know that he appreciates everything he's done for him and Caitlin. But come to think of it, the chance of them going down that road is not something foreign to his imagination. To be honest, that's one of the things he had with him when he came back for her. They both knew that they belong to each other and if not for the unexpected twist of events in their lives, they would have been planning their wedding at this point of time.

He just smiled and put that thought in that treasured part of his mind where it always belonged. It may take a lot of time and work but they'll get there, oh how he promised to himself that he'll take them there no matter what. But for now he'll focus on getting her back, getting his Cait back. He wouldn't force her to return his feelings if she wasn't ready yet for he also knew she still needed her time. She's been through a lot and he'd perfectly understand if jumping into a relationship wouldn't be her top priority. He's lucky enough that she decided to let him in after all the betrayal she's gone through and it would only be fitting for him to not break that trust at any cost. Besides, he's done everything just to make her agree to this and he's sure he won't be the one to give up on them just yet.

Soon enough, the day he's been waiting for came when she called him up and told him she would be free starting Monday. He didn't waste a single second when he showed up on her doorstep first thing in the morning on that day, a bouquet of flowers in one hand and a cup of coffee on the other. Good thing Caitlin has always been a morning person and she only had to get her purse when he asked her to go with him to a place where their story started.

Which brings him back to their current situation.

"I swear-"

"Cait, remember you agreed with this, too."

"Don't remind me. It only makes me realize how many bad decisions I've done in my life."

"Hey! Are you saying I'm a bad decision?"

"Do you really want to hear my answer to that?" She asked, an eyebrow raised as she placed a hand on her hip.

"Well-"

"You know what? We've been here since morning and I've been nothing but cooperative with everything you're asking me to do but my memories are still stuck. I don't think this is a good idea after all." She begrudgingly took the space beside him, crossing her arms in front of her as she turned her gaze to a faraway place.

"Hey, hey, hey." He wrapped an arm around her shoulders, soothing them until she uncrossed her arms and had her palms wipe the frown off her face. She let out a heavy sigh and leaned back to the bench, her face turning up with both of her eyes still closed.

"Don't say that okay? I brought you here because this is the place we've first met. We were both eleven and I was in the middle of a fight when you came along and chased them away." He smiled at her when he noticed the crease forming between her brows as she took in everything he said. "Then you gave me your popsicle which I refused to accept at first. I told you I wasn't really a fan of sweets but the truth is I was just shy and it would feel like taking advantage of you, you know?" He slightly turned away from her as he scratched the back of his neck. His 11-year old self surfacing as he took a trip down memory lane.

Then his attention went back to her when he felt her shaking. He held his breath, thinking whether he did something wrong but then he was faced by an image of her trying to conceal her laughter. It was rare for her to smile let alone laugh, so he asked,

"What?"

"Nothing. I just can't decide which of the two would be more hilarious." She replied, still struggling to contain her giggles.

"What do you mean?"

"Who would've thought that the proud owner of S.T.A.R. Labs was once saved by a girl?"

"You-"

"Oh-oh wait, that's not the best part. He thought that by taking her popsicle, he would be _'taking advantage'_ of her."

And that's when she lost it. She burst into a fit of laughter like she hadn't been able to do so in the past few months. He wanted to say something, defend himself from her teasing. He would've told her that he was outnumbered and that she had her bodyguards to back her up. Or that he wasn't as confident back then as he was now. But none of it came out from his mouth. He just stared at her, a mix of longing and happiness in his eyes.

"What?" Now it was her turn to ask when she finally got hold of her outburst, composing herself.

"Nothing. I just realized how much I miss hearing you laugh like that."

"I...I don't think I have much reason to laugh these days." She bit her lower lip and turned away from him, a gesture he has long figured out. So he did the one thing he's really good at, cheering her up.

He stood in front of her with his brightest smile, held out a hand and said, "Hi, I'm Barry. What's your name?"

"Barry, what are you doing?" She asked, a bit confused.

"Hi, I'm Bartholomew Henry Allen. Just call me Barry and you are?"

"Bartholomew? Your name is Bartholomew?"

"Cait, you're supposed to say 'I'm Caitlin. It's nice to meet you.' or 'It's Cait and I'm honored to be graced by the presence of a very handsome man like you.' Either would be fine. So let's try this again. Hi, I'm-"

"Seriously Barry, what are you doing?"

"You're testing my patience here, Cait."

"I'm testing your patience? You're the one who's ignoring my question."

"Cait, just-okay? We have all day to talk about my reasons. But now that we're in this very special place, I say that we savor the moment and that would only happen if you just cooperate."

"Fine." She said and gave him her infamous eye roll.

For the nth time, Barry stood in front of her. His smile radiant as the first time if not, then even more. He held out his hand once again, willing for her to take it.

"Hi, I'm Barry. What's your name?"

"I'm Caitlin. Nice to meet you." She replied with a let's-just-get-this-over-with kind of tone which Barry had to raise an eyebrow at.

"Aww come on, Caity. You can do better than that. Just think of this like it's really the first time we'll meet. Like a fresh start or something."

He has said the words effortlessly like he didn't want her to put much meaning into it as much as she is inclined to. She knew this wasn't one of his ways of teasing her. It's actually his subtle approach to let her know how serious he is about helping her. He wanted her to be positive about this whole ordeal when all she did was sulk and get frustrated so easily. That's when she accepted the fact that she has always appreciated him, his teasing, his encouragements, his patience, his _everything_.

Then she did something for the first time.

She let him know.

"Hi, I'm Cait. What's your name?"

She stood up from the bench and held out a hand for him. Her smile, _oh her smile,_ is almost exactly the same as it was before. And Barry found himself dumbfounded by the sight he's been longing to see.

"I think this is the part where you would shake my hand and answer my question, _Bartholomew_."

"I, well...Cait, I don't understand."

"This is how it's supposed to be, right? I was the one who approached you, here in the same playground we first met?"

"Yeah, that's right."

"So what are you waiting for? My hand wouldn't remain outstretched forever you know."

"Oh-yeah." He immediately shook her hand and his shaky words soon followed, "I-I'm Barry. It's such a pleasure to meet you, Cait."

"So Barry, what brings you here on the playground?" She returned to her spot on the bench and patted the space beside her, signaling for him to occupy it.

He didn't know what changed or if a change has really occurred because it happened so fast, so sudden that it's so hard to believe. But the Caitlin in front of him now is almost similar to his Cait. Deep down he knew she isn't, not just yet, but he wouldn't dare call her out of it. What matters now is that she's trying, really does, and it makes the smile on his face grow even wider.

"Well, I was helping out a...friend. She kinda lost her memories and I thought maybe if I'll bring her here and redo a significant part of her life, it'll help her remember something."

"Any progress?"

"Nah, I don't think it'll work."

"And why is that?"

"Don't get me wrong. I mean, my plan is perfect. It's just that the problem is with her. She's stubborn, uncooperative and she threatens my life every now and then-ow!" He said, rubbing the part of his shoulder that she has slapped.

"I introduced myself for five consecutive times! I was starting to look ridiculous, Barry. How dare you say I wasn't cooperative?"

"But you're not doing it right. You look grumpy and your smile is forced, nothing like my Cait."

"Your what?!"

"What I meant was, you're nothing like the 11-year old Cait I met back then."

"What was she like?"

"Hmm?"

"The 11-year old me, Barry. What was she like?"

He closed his eyes for a minute, reminiscing every detail he remembered most about her before. He could go all day by just describing how mesmerized he was by her, in more ways than one at that. But then he decided to tell her the words he wasn't able to tell her that day.

"She was my hero."

Caitlin expected him to say something that would describe her personality or what she looked like, anything about her with his own twist of cheesiness because that what she learned about him. He's Barry Allen, the sappy romantic guy who would foolishly do anything for the woman he loves, someone who could get on her nerves in record time. She thought that maybe she had him all figured out but now he had tell her just that, an answer far beyond what her knowledge about him could take her.

Why do you have to be this interesting, Barry Allen?

 _Interestingly stupid._

"I really thought you were the coolest back then. I haven't told you about this before but you did save me, Cait, in more ways than you can ever imagine. You're my hero Caitlin Snow, always has been always will be."

He's looking at her with utmost sincerity and she hates herself for wishing that it's just all a lie and he's just toying with her like he usually does. Because how can she stay together and not fall apart when he's looking at her like this? How, for her sanity's sake, can she stay behind the confines of her walls when he's already broken in without putting much of an effort?

"What about me?" She asks, a question intended more to herself than to him but she continues nonetheless, "Who's going to save me?"

Barry looked at her with kind eyes, carefully deciphering the deeper meaning of her question.

"Me. Because believe it or not Cait, sometimes heroes need saving too."

* * *

The ride to the manor was rather uneventful, a stark contrast to what their day had been. Maybe they both needed some peace and quiet from time to time, a break from all the stress life has thrown their way. Barry had pulled over once they reached the front of the house's double doors but none of them dared to move.

"Thank you." "I'm sorry."

They both said in unison but they heard it all the same. Caitlin turned to face him and saw how he tightened his grip on the steering wheel as he lay his forehead on the cool surface.

"Why are you apologizing to me, Barry?"

"Well...I-I was hoping for a different outcome, you know? I thought that maybe, bringing you there would somehow-"

"It's okay. I may not recall anything but being in that place gave me some sense of peace. And I guess, that's all I wanted to have in a long time so thank you for bringing me there."

"You really mean it?" He asked as a smile started to replace the uneasiness in his features.

"Of course. And it's actually a good thing that I've been to the very place that has been plaguing my dreams for years."

"You have dreamt of that place? Why didn't you tell me?"

"I actually did. Remember the night when you came into S.T.A.R. Labs and I had to treat your bruise with Cisco's popsicle because I couldn't find some ice? Now I know why it triggered something. It's almost as if history repeated itself." She said, amused that something as peculiar as that can really happen.

 _"And you didn't even know how much it broke my heart that it did. It hurt that you were there, within my reach but I knew I couldn't have you. Not anymore."_ These are the words that his mind was screaming but he doesn't have the courage to tell her just yet. She doesn't need to know that he's no stranger to pain, too. She doesn't need to know that deep down, there's this crippling pain that came from missing her. She doesn't need to know how much it's killing him to be this close but not be able to hold her, kiss her and even tell her how much he loves her still.

But he can only take too much and the words came out from his already loosening grasp before he even had the chance to think.

"I would've kissed you that night. I could have...I could have kissed you that night, Cait." He said as he looked desperately into her eyes.

"But you didn't."

"Because I wasn't supposed to. You were supposedly married at that time and even if you're not, I still wouldn't because you're not-"

"I know." _I'm not your Cait._

The comfortable silence they once had is slowly turning into a deafening one. They have long established that this is nothing like a business proposal but it's still an agreement nonetheless. Should they be more clear about the rules and boundaries? Or should they have settled for a real business proposal where the terms and conditions are thoroughly specified?

Caitlin knew she had gambled her everything into this but now she realizes that maybe he did the same too. What if they don't make it? What if they lose something more than they had gambled? She couldn't take any more from him than she already did. His heart didn't deserve to be put in her hands, hands that were too fragile to even pick up the pieces of her own.

She gives him an out.

"Barry, I don't want you...I mean if this-this whole thing falls apart I don't think I can handle being the reason of you getting hurt."

"What are you trying to say Caitlin?"

"I'm giving you an out. I think it's better that we end this as early as possible so we can prevent further casualties."

His image was one of defeat, shoulders slumped, head leaned backward, eyes closed and his long exasperated sigh.

"Do you know how you've become my hero, Cait?"

"You already told me, Barry." She didn't know where he's going with this but she felt compelled to not argue with him for once.

"I know but I left out an important part."

"What is it?"

"When I was young my mom was murdered and my dad went to jail for it. I know he was innocent and it was someone else but no one believed me."

"Oh, Barry..."

"So when I met you that day, I saw you as someone who believed in me. You even stood up for me even though you barely know me. I just didn't get it. I almost stopped seeing the good in people back then if you hadn't crossed my path and made me believe otherwise."

He slowly took one of her hands in his, gently squeezing it as he continued,

"You may say that I was young and naive, that I have a tendency to romanticize everything but I know what I felt. What I saw in you was real."

"I didn't know you had to go through that phase in your life. I'm so sorry to hear that, Barry."

"It's just one of the things, Cait. I may be hurt and broken just like you but it doesn't mean I can't be your hero, too. Right?"

Her gaze went down to their linked hands and noticed how they fit perfectly, how it looked like it belonged there, how it felt a little less lonely seeing two broken pieces of soul trying to mend each other.

She's already been his hero.

Now it's time she let him be hers.

"Okay."

"Okay, as in...?"

She leaned closer to him and whispered to his ear,

"Go be my hero, Barry Allen."

His eyes lit up, forming wrinkles on the side of it as a smile found a place on his features once again.

"You've already said it. There's no taking it back, promise?"

"Promise. And I'm sorry if I keep on doing this to you. I know I already agreed on this but-"

"Hey, hey, you have to stop that or else you'll have to make it up to me, Cait."

"Why don't I like the sound of that? Not even a bit."

They both laughed at that and for a moment they've forgotten about the tension hanging on their shoulders just minutes ago.

"Plus, you won't get rid of me that easily. You're stuck with me for the next 29 days, Dr. Snow."

"29 days? I thought we settled for just two weeks?"

"What?! Cait you said-"

"I know. I'm just messing with you."

"Caitlin Snow, you're such a-"

"Finish that sentence and I won't let you in for dinner."

"You're inviting me for dinner?" He asked, smiling cheekily.

She just grinned at him and got out of the car. Her steps light as feather as she made her way inside the manor, not turning back even once but she made sure to leave the door open for him.

Barry rushed after her, careful not to stumble upon his own feet as he couldn't quite contain the excitement overwhelming his senses. That's when he realized that no matter what happens, no matter where they are or _who_ they might be right now, they'll always find a way to each other.

Barry Allen, Caitlin Snow.

Hero, Heroine.

* * *

 **END OF PART FIFTEEN**

* * *

 **AN: I want to dedicate this chapter to you, the one reading this right know. Thank you for choosing to spend your time reading this and if you happen to have left a review to any of the previous chapters, I want to express my outmost gratitude for keeping me inspired and motivated. So I hope you enjoyed this one, you wonderful reader.**

 **-A**


	16. Chapter 16

"You have two perfectly functioning hands, Barry. I don't see the point of why you refuse to make use of them."

"Babe, come on. You used to love doing this. Plus, the doctor said-"

"Two things, Mr. Allen." She said, glaring at him while she slowly leaned forward, making sure she's gotten her point across. "First, before you ever think of using the doctor card again, may I remind you that I'm a doctor myself. It's safe to say I'm more knowledgeable about this things than you are."

"Exactly! You're a doctor and you know better than I do that avoiding these stimuli will not be helping your condition. So I don't see the point of you arguing-"

"I'm not finished yet! Listen to me and you better listen to me well. Second, I'm so not your _babe_ so stop calling me that."

"Oh but I was hoping you will be." He mumbled.

"What did you say?"

"I didn't say anything. Now, why don't you start feeding me the red velvet. It looks really delicious." He said as he leaned forward and opened his mouth, waiting for her to spoonfeed him.

Caitlin kept her ground, not giving even a bit of consideration into this-this _inappropriate_ and rather _embarrassing_ gesture that Barry's taunting her to do. She's already been having second thoughts about coming with him to Jitters for she can quite remember him telling her about the things they used to do here. And now all she wants to do is reprimand herself for not listening to her more logical side.

"Barry, you can't be serious about this. I have a good reputation in this city and I don't want to risk losing that by-by...feeding you in public!"

"Dr. Snow, two things." He said, ignoring the glare she's thrown his way for the fact that he just used the same spiel she did earlier. "First, before you ever think of using the I-have-a-good-reputation-to-keep card, let me remind you that I have that too. Do you think being fed in public is something I'm proud of? You should actually be thanking me for sacrificing my reputation just to help you. Even if I had to go through this stuff, how embarrassing it may be."

Caitlin was about to give him a piece of her mind for she knew too well what he was doing. _How dare you use reverse psychology on me, Allen,_ she thought. But as soon as she started opening her mouth, he quickly held up a hand in front of her face.

"I'm not finished yet. Second, how many times do I have to tell you that it's not Barry? You should be used to calling me _ba-by_ not _Ba-rry_. The doctor said it would help so if you won't do it, I'm afraid I'll just have to ignore you."

He lazily leaned back to his chair, clasped his hands together while enjoying the sight of a fuming Caitlin. She didn't know what's with him today and where the hell did he get that confidence to talk to her like he did. The doctor had suggested a lot of potential ways to help her but that certainly isn't one of them or at least not exactly but she knows Barry would go so far as bending the truth to have his way with the situation.

She made a mental list of the most venomous words she could think of, hoping this lash out would get through Barry's being so downright devastating he would never ever try to taunt her again. But then, something clicked in her brilliant mind. Maybe that's what he's aiming for. Seeing that smug look on his face told her that he enjoyed it very much whenever she's this close to strangling him.

And so a plan formed in her pretty little head.

And an evil one at that.

"Then why don't you come a little closer?"

She smiled sweetly at him and he wouldn't even believe it was real if it wasn't for how alluring she looked at him and how affectionately she took one of his hands in hers and settled them on top of the table.

"Now, that's more like my Cait."

Barry cautiously studied her as she took a piece of the dessert with her spoon and gestured for him to eat it. He did as he was told, a bit too enthusiastically that he didn't notice her putting another spoonful of red velvet into his mouth before he even had the chance to chew the first one. Then she put another. And another.

He quickly took hold of her hand, stopping her from putting yet another serving into his already full mouth. He searched for something to drink but couldn't fine any. Well, except for the glass of water she purposefully placed outside of his reach.

"What's wrong, Barry? I thought you said it looks delicious but you don't look like you were enjoying it."

"Cait..please...wa..ter..." He pleaded with her as he struggled to keep himself from choking to death.

"I'm sorry, what was that? I don't get a thing you're saying. But you were right about one thing though. I really do enjoy feeding you."

She smirked at him and he knows she planned this all along. He reminded himself that the accident may have erased her memories but certainly not her wittiness. Still clever as ever, Snow, he thought.

Barry got up and made his way to her side of the table and snatched the glass of water in her hands. He can only watch as a victorious laugh erupted from her lungs, a glint of mischievousness shining in her eyes.

"So I see how you find entertainment in other people's misery." He said after getting a hold of himself.

"Oh, I don't get entertained with other people's misery. Just yours."

She started to laugh again and he was so tempted to join her but he had other plans in mind. More interesting plans.

"Is that so? Now I understand why you're being so hard on me. I hope you're happy now, Caitlin." He said, an expression of hurt and disappointment forming on his features.

As soon as those words left his mouth, he got up and turned to leave, not even sparing a glance her way. Caitlin just sat there dumbfounded, trying to understand the scene that has just unfolded before her.

Has she really gone overboard? Barry wasn't the type to get offended so easily, as what she had learned from spending time with him. It's been a couple of days since their agreement and those times were filled with his teasing, their endless banters and some heart to heart conversations at times. He was never offended by it so what made this time so different?

This is the first time she saw him like that and it's because of what? Her overfeeding him with a red velvet cake? She thinks not. There's gotta be something she did that made him so upset. Was it something she said? Oh no, it really had to be something she said.

Before she can entertain another thought in her mind, she found herself running after Barry. Good thing he's not walking fast as she spotted him heading to a nearby park. She tried to walk as fast as her three-inch heels could take her. When she finally made to a hearing distance from him she said,

"Wait Barry! I'm sorry for what I did."

He didn't seem to hear her, or pretended not to, so she tried to lessen the distance by brisk walking even though her heels were practically killing her.

"Barry please, just listen to me."

Now that she's sure he could her her, she realized he was ignoring her on purpose. Did she really upset him that much for him to ignore her apologies?

"Barry Allen! Stop right there and talk to me. I don't know why you're so upset but can we please just talk about this?"

Caitlin noticed that there were actually people in the park and she dared not to draw more attention than she already did so she resolved to by far the stupidest solution she ever thought of doing. It may be stupid but it's the only thing she thought that can capture his attention.

"Look baby, I'm sorry." She let out a sigh of relief when she saw him stop but still refusing to face her.

"What did you just say?" He asked, loud enough so she can hear him despite not looking at her.

"I said I'm sorry."

Caitlin took a couple steps towards him and placed a hesitant hand on his shoulder. He finally turned to look at her and said,

"No, you said something before that. Say it again."

His gaze held a mischievous glint and his ever boyish smile creeping up his face. Caitlin had to furrow her brows in confusion. One second he was walking out of her in the coffee shop then now he's looking at her like she discovered a onetime cure for cancer.

"What? I just said I'm sorry."

"No, no, no. Cait, you know what you've said. And I want to hear it again."

And if it wasn't obvious to her before, it is now. How can you be so gullible, Dr. Snow? A small voice in her head mocked her. She was definitely not this stupid but she clearly fell right into his trap, a plan so devilishly formed she didn't even see it coming.

"You planned this all along didn't you?!"

"What?" He asked, faking innocence which only made the angry expression in her face worsen.

"You know too well what I'm talking about so wipe that annoying smirk off your face before I permanently remove that myself."

"But I can't help it, Cait. You finally called me ba-"

"Shut up! I don't want to talk to you ever again. It's so stupid of me to actually fall for your stupid act you stupid, annoying, incorrigible-ughh!"

Caitlin abruptly turned away from him and started going the opposite direction. She just couldn't stand him and she's afraid that should she stay a second longer, she'll have to murder him in the park, not giving damn about other people watching her.

"Aww, please baby don't be mad. Besides, you almost choked me to death earlier. How about we call it quits?" He said, going after her and grabbing one of her hands in his. She violently escaped from his grasp and said,

"Touch me again and I won't hesitate to perform lobotomy on you right here, right now."

She continued walking, setting her vision straight to a distance she didn't realize someone crossing her path until she bumped into a-

A little girl?

Due to how fast she was walking, the little girl stumbled a few feet before her, clutching her now skinned knees in pain.

"Oh my gosh! I'm so sorry I didn't see you. Are you alright?" She crouched down to the girl's level and examined her wound. It's just a scratch, thank goodness.

"You're hurt. Come, let me fix it."

"No!"

The little girl shoved her approaching hand and cried louder than before. Caitlin was starting to panic, guilt overwhelming her being. Sure, she handled a lot of serious cases worse than this one but she was in the safety of the emergency room then, where there were no judging eyes to watch her every move. Plus, it didn't help that she was the one to cause such pain to the poor innocent little girl.

She's a doctor and she supposedly be the one to relieve the pain, not cause one. Just as she was starting to lose hope, she heard Barry's voice from behind her.

"Look Cait, I'm really sorry. I've been a jerk and-hey, what happened?" He asked when he noticed the little girl in front of Caitlin crying. "Are you alright?"

Barry put a comforting hand on the girl's shoulder but she waved it off. He drew back almost instantly, not wanting to pressure her.

"Hey, it's alright. I just want to help you. What's your name?" He tried his best smile but the girl didn't answer.

"I'm Barry and this is Caitlin. Let us help you clean your wound, okay?"

"No! I want my mommy..."

"Where's your mommy?"

Caitlin asked but instead of answering, the girl just burst into crying once again. Barry gave her a what-did-you-do look and she hopelessly shrugged, praying that the girl would stop crying.

"Shh, it's okay. We'll go find her, alright? But first we need to tend that scratch on your knees. We don't want that getting infected now, do we?"

The girl shook her head and Barry scooped her up and sat her down on one of the nearby benches. Caitlin just watched in awe how he managed to that when all her attempts miserably failed.

"Cait, stay with her. I'll go buy something to clean her wounds with."

"No need. I have a first aid kit in my purse." She said as she rummaged through her purse in search for an antiseptic and band aids.

"You do?"

"Don't look so surprised. I'm a doctor, I'm supposed to have one. Besides, it's just portable."

Caitlin set the things beside the girl as she crouched down in front of her. As she was about to dab her wound with a cotton ball, the little girl quickly latched onto Barry while shaking her head furiously.

"Don't be scared. It's going to be fine I promise." He said as he soothed the girl's back.

"Can you do it instead of her?"

"Yeah, sure."

They switched places so Caitlin sat beside the girl while Barry started dressing her wounds. It didn't take long for him to finish and the little girl seemed satisfied with his work.

"You see? I told you it won't hurt."

"Thank you Mr. Barry. By the way, my name is Emily."

"Emily, I'm really sorry about what happened. I didn't realize you were there. Can I at least make it up to you?" Caitlin asked, hoping it will somehow relieve the guilt eating her up since she bumped into her.

"It's okay. It doesn't hurt anymore since Mr. Barry already fixed it." She said, flashing Barry one of the cutest smiles ever.

"It's actually my fault why she accidentally bumped into you, Em. So I'm really sorry, too."

"Did you make her upset, Mr. Barry?"

"Yeah, I did. I've been a total jerk earlier."

"What's a jerk?"

Caitlin glared at Barry, reprimanding him about his choice of words in front of a kid. He just put his hands up in defense and sent an apologetic smile her way.

"That's actually not a good word, Emily. We use that when we're referring to horrible people." Caitlin said, gently stroking the girl's hair.

"Oh okay. Ms. Caitlin, do you think Mr. Barry is a horrible person?"

"No, of course not. Why did you ask that?"

"Because he said he was _that_. And you said you only use that when you refer to horrible people."

"Hmm, okay maybe he did become horrible earlier." She replied, catching Barry's gaze at the corner of her eyes.

"Did you already apologize to her, Mr. Barry?"

"Well, I tried to but she's been ignoring me. I was hoping if you could help me fix that?"

"Sure. What do you want me to do?"

Barry leaned closer to Emily and whispered something into her ear while he kept his eyes on Caitlin who, in his opinion, is sending daggers through him by just looking straight into his eyes.

A few moments of whispering and Caitlin trying not to strangle Barry in front of the child, they were done with their discussion. Emily stood up on the bench to give Caitlin the most adorable hug and kisses both of her cheeks with a 'mwah' then said,

"I'm so sorry, baby."

It took a moment for Caitlin to digest how adorable the gesture was and she felt her heart swell for the little girl.

"You don't have to apologize to me, Emily. I was the one who bumped into you. It's all my fault."

"That's not from me. It's from Mr. Barry."

"From...Barry?" She said then eyed Barry who was clasping his hands together in a plea and sticking out his bottom lip to complete his version of being "adorable".

"Look at him, Ms. Caitlin. He's very sorry. Can you please forgive him now? Please, please, pleeeaase."

"Come on, Cait. Pleeeeease?"

Her rolled her eyes at him but she knew there's no way she can't say no to that. She would've commented how it was low for Barry to use an adorable innocent child for his own good but what can she say? That kid is like a doll snatched from a world where unicorns and rainbows exist and there's no way she'll let her down even if that meant forgiving the stupidly annoying man that is Barry Allen.

"Alright, fine. I forgive him."

"Yay!" Emily squealed in delight (as Barry did too but he wouldn't admit it out loud), momentarily forgetting the fact that she was indeed lost.

They made a little group hug with Emily in the middle and to the people who were also in the park, they sure do look like a small family having a celebration.

After they pulled apart, realization hit Barry and Caitlin about the little girl between them so Barry decided to ask,

"Where's your mommy, Emily? Don't tell me you went to the park alone."

"I was running after her before I bumped into Ms. Caitlin. She didn't know I was following her because she told me to stay on the bench near the food stalls."

"You should have listened to her, Emily. She must be worried sick."

"I know..." Emily said as tears started to well up in her eyes.

"Don't cry, Em. We'll help you find her, okay?"

"Okay."

The three of them went to the place where Emily was supposed to stay. They waited for her mother for a couple of minutes when she started to get hungry. They were near the food stalls so Barry decided he'll get the food himself while they wait for her mom to arrive.

"Just wait here, okay? I'll just go grab some food."

"Thanks Barry."

He nodded and went on his way. Caitlin looked at Emily, who was staring at her intently.

"Emily, what's wrong?"

"Ms. Caitlin, I have something to ask."

"Sure, what is it?"

Emily looked down on her feet, took a deep breath before asking,

"Do you like him?"

"Who?"

"Mr. Barry. Do you like him?"

Of all the possible questions she thought she'd be asking, this is surely the last thing she expected. She's a bit taken a back but she didn't know if it was because of the question or because the question came from a little girl like her. Maybe both.

"Why do you ask?"

"I like him. I think he's a nice guy. Don't you think so too Ms. Caitlin?"

"Well, I...he..he's-" For the first time, Caitlin found herself stammering with her own words. She's a doctor and she runs a company, finding the right words wasn't really a problem to her, at least not until now. She's almost a babbling mess in front of a little girl who's just asking her a teeny tiny question about her-

 _Love life?_

"He told me he likes you very much. Don't tell him that I told you. He said it's supposed to be our secret."

"So why tell me now? You know it's not a good thing to spill other's secrets."

"I know. But I want him to be happy."

"And by telling me his secret you think he'll be happy?"

"No...I told you so you won't get upset with him again. He really looked sad when you said you were upset because of him. So if you don't get upset with him anymore, then he'll be happy."

"You know for a young girl like you, you sure have an incredible observation skills." She said, slightly pinching the girl's nose, making her squeal.

"Promise me you won't get upset with him anymore. Please, Ms. Caitlin, pleeeeaaase."

Caitlin didn't know that kids have this effect on her. She quickly made a mental note to stay away from cute children whenever she has to make major life decisions. She nodded her head in surrender and said,

"Okay, but I only promise to try. Is that alright with you?"

"Yup!" She exclaimed and put out her little pinky to Caitlin to seal the deal. She smiled sweetly at her after she intertwined her finger with her in a pinky promise.

"I have a secret too. But I'll only tell you if you swear not to tell anyone especially Barry. Sound good?"

"Okay!"

"Well, I think I-"

"Dr. Snow?"

A tall, well-built man in a crisp suit interrupted whatever it is that Caitlin has been meaning to reply. She took a closer look at him and she recognized him immediately.

"Mr. Zolomon? What are you doing here?"

"It really is you, Dr. Snow. I was wondering where you had been since your secretary informed me of your month-long leave."

"Oh, about that. I had some personal matters I need to attend to."

"By personal matters you mean...I didn't know you had a daughter Dr. Snow." He said as he noticed Emily sitting beside Caitlin, latching on her arm.

"Oh, she's not my-"

"It's okay. I wouldn't doubt it since she looks as beautiful as her mom." He said then bend down to Emily's level and asked her, "What's your name young lady?"

"I'm Emily." She replied, drawing closer to Caitlin's side. Whoever this man is, she didn't like him one bit. He's nothing like Mr. Barry who looks so sweet and kind.

"Well, it's nice to meet you Emily." He said then returned his attention back to Caitlin. "You never mentioned to me that you have a daughter let alone a husband or boyfriend maybe? I don't see a ring on that finger is all."

"That's because I-"

"Babe, you didn't tell me what you want so I just got you a burrito. I know you like that ever since." Barry said as he approached them. He's trying to balance all the food in his hands he hadn't notice they weren't alone. "And as for you Em, I got you a corn dog. You like it?"

"So I suppose you're Caitlin's boyfriend?"

Barry abruptly looked at him after he placed the food on the table adjacent to the bench. The man standing before him looks intimidating, from his expensive choice of clothing, his height, his built up to his meticulously fixed hair.

Something settled in the pit of his stomach and he didn't like the feeling of it one bit. And the way he's been looking at Caitlin and the mocking tone he used when he asked him earlier is not something he's comfortable with.

"Cait, you know this guy?"

Caitlin, who's been sensing the tension building between the men, stood up and positioned herself in the middle. She took a deep breath before saying,

"This is Mr. Hunter Zolomon, he's one of the major stockholders in my company."

"Please to meet you-"

"It's Barry, Barry Allen. I'm the owner of S.T.A.R. Labs. It's a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Zolomon."

Both men took their time shaking each other's hands and if it wasn't for Caitlin clearing her throat and Emily grumbling about wanting to eat, they wouldn't have released each other's hand on purpose.

"So how are you related with Dr. Snow? I talk to her almost everyday but she hasn't mentioned you once so I suppose you two are not that acquainted. Am I right, Cait?"

There's something about his words that made Barry want to punch him in the face. First, who was he to imply that him and Caitlin are much more "acquainted" than they are? Second, no one calls his Cait, _Cait_. No one but him.

"You-" Barry started but Caitlin interrupted him by saying,

"Mr. Zolomon, can I have a minute with you?" She said, and shot a look at Barry that told him to behave. He knew she was right so he nodded and took a seat across Emily.

"Sure, anything for you Cait. And please, it's Hunter. We're outside work so I prefer you call me that way."

"Uhm...okay. But if you don't mind, I rather be called Caitlin. Cait's just too informal for me."

Upon hearing those words, Barry made a little happy dance in his mind. He could've done it in person but he didn't want this Hunter guy to have more leverage than already has.

He watched as the pair walk a few meters away from them. He noted how Caitlin kept an appropriate distance from Hunter which in his opinion, is trying to get as close to her as possible. Everything seemed okay until Caitlin said something that made Hunter let out a sigh of relief. After a few exchanges, he waved her goodbye and before Barry could react, he was leaning in and kissing her cheek.

That bastard.

"Mr. Barry, are you okay? You haven't started eating your food." Emily asked while munching on her corn dog.

"I'm fine, Em. I just lost my appetite all of a sudden." He replied, eyes still glued to Caitlin which was just returning from their small talk.

"You know I don't like him either."

"Huh?"

"That guy with Ms. Caitlin. I don't like him either."

"Me too, Em. But Caitlin seemed fond of him. I don't know what she sees in that bastard."

"What's a bastard?"

Barry's eyes widened in shock, a hand coming up to cover his mouth while he thought of a way on how he should answer her question in a sensible way.

"Em, don't say that again okay? It's wrong of me to say that. It's a bad word so just forget about it."

"Forget about what?" Caitlin asked.

"Nothing, right Em?"

"It's wrong to lie Mr. Barry."

"She's right, _Mr. Barry_. It's wrong to lie. Now, why don't you tell me what was it about?" Caitlin asked as she took her space beside Emily.

"I may have mentioned a bad word."

"Again?! What would Emily's mom think when we see her and all of a suuden her daughter knows a lot of inappropriate words?"

"Ms. Caitlin." Emily tugged at her arm and whispered something in her ear which Caitlin had to nod in agreement.

"I'm sorry for raising my voice at you Barry. But can you please be more considerate next time?"

Barry was taken aback by Caitlin's sudden change in demeanor. She loves it when she gets to scold or reprimand him. It's like she lives for those moments but now she just let it go just like that? Does it have something to do with what Emily whispered to her? Now, he's curious.

"Em, what did you say to her?"

"We made a pinky promise Mr. Barry but I can't tell you what."

"Oh, come on. Why won't you tell me?"

"Just ask Ms. Caitlin about it."

"Cait?"

"Not happening, Barry." She said and both of the girls laughed at his sulking face. They both stopped when they heard a middle-aged woman approaching their table and calling out to her daughter.

"Mommy!" She shouted and she immediately ran to her mom's open arms.

"Sweetie, I'm so worried about you. I thought I lost you for good. Are you alright? Did anything happen?"

"I'm fine mommy. I just had a scratch on my knees but it doesn't hurt now. Mr. Barry and Ms. Caitlin helped me clean it up."

"Barry and Caitlin?"

"Yup! They're the ones who brought me back here." She said and dragged her mom to where Barry and Caitlin sat, both looking at her with smiles on their faces.

"You must be Emily's mom. I'm Barry and this is Caitlin."

"Yes. Thank you both so much for looking after her. I know she can be handful at times."

"She's been a very good girl to us, Mrs.?"

"Oh, it's Stella, Stella Campbell. Thank you again. I don't know how can I repay you."

"There's no need for that Mrs. Campbell. Our time with your wonderful daughter is more than enough." Barry said.

"Thank goodness you were the ones who found her. I bet you'll be great parents someday."

They both blushed at her statement but neither of them dared to disagree with her.

"Thank you." They both said.

"We should probably go now. Emily, say goodbye to Barry and Caitlin."

Emily rushed to Caitlin first, hugging her and kissing her cheek. Then she went to Barry, hugging him a bit tighter then kissed his cheek a little longer. Barry seemed hesitant to let her go, a sight Caitlin found so amusing. Was he always this good with children? She thought as she saw how he gave her a kiss on the forehead before letting her run back to her mom.

"I'm going to miss the two of you. Bye bye!" She waved and they started walking away.

"We're going to miss you too, Emily."

* * *

They decided to take one last walk around the park before going back to Jitters where Barry had parked his car. It was a comfortable silence for the two of them until Caitlin said, "You seem to be good at handling kids."

"Yeah? Well, you are too."

"No, I mean you handled it well when you had to clean her wounds. In which, I've gotta say, I failed miserably despite being a doctor."

"I don't know. Maybe it just comes naturally. You know how naturally charming I can be, right?" He said and winked at her which she only laughed at.

"What? No 'you think highly of yourself, Mr. Allen' or 'in your dreams, Barry'. You're not going to argue with me on that, Dr. Snow?"

"Don't tempt me, Barry. I made a promise and I can't let someone like you be the reason for me to break that."

"What is it?"

"I told you, it's a secret." It was her turn to wink at him and it made him too weak to even argue further.

"Fine, fine." He replied, rolling his eyes at her.

They fall into a comfortable silence once again but Barry's mind has been bombarded with a lot of thoughts and questions about that major stockholder of hers so he asked,

"What did you and Mr. Zolomon talk about?"

"Nothing important. I just had to clear something up."

"And what is that exactly?"

"You know you're a bit too nosy to be a man, you know that?"

"I'm not being nosy. I'm just concerned."

"Well, he thought that Emily was my daughter and you were my boyfriend. So I had to clear that one up. Don't want to have rumors spreading in my company when I get back."

"Was it that bad?"

"What?"

"You and me?"

Caitlin stopped in her tracks and turned to look at him, searching his eyes to make sure this isn't one of his tricks again. She kept on searching, but found nothing but sincerity.

Is she ready for this kind of commitment? She knew she had something for this man but up until now, she wasn't given any chance to explore what it might be. It feels foreign and familiar at the same time, like she always felt when something triggers her memories. She has been in love before, hasn't she?

So maybe this is what it feels like?

Being in love?

"Barry?"

"Yeah?"

"If I...if I was lost like Emily and you found me, would you...would you stay with me until I am found?"

"Of course. You know I would."

"So could you stay a little longer?"

 _Can you wait for me until I'm ready?_

"I'll stay as long as you need me to."

 _Take as much time as you need. I'm not going anywhere._

They don't need the exact words to understand each other. Their connection, it's always been there. It's not something even the lost of memories can take away.

Caitlin closed the distance between them, wrapped her arms around his body and whispered,

"Thanks, baby."

* * *

 **END OF PART SISIXTEEN**

* * *

 **AN: Happy birthday Raquel! You've always been an avid reader of this fic so I hope you liked this one.**

 **-A**


	17. Chapter 17

"When you mentioned about a getaway, you didn't exactly mean outside of Central City right?"

Caitlin asked, a bit too anxiously, as she saw the sign that says, "Thank You for Visiting Central City! Come Again!" passed by in a blur among the other things that ensemble a transformation from skyscrapers to a majority of trees lining up the road.

A few days ago, in the middle of their lunch out, Barry had insisted that they should spend the remaining week of their time together in a getaway trip. And by that he meant a two-hour ride to the borders of Coast City where his father's vacation house was settled in.

A raised eyebrow was Caitlin's initial response to the mere mention of getaway so, in Barry's defense, he just had to bend the truth in his subtle, little covert way to convince her to come with him.

"Cait, relax. It's not that far from Central City and besides, it's not gonna be a getaway if we don't actually _get away_ from the city."

"I just agreed to come because you said-"

"I know, I know. And I also know that if I told you exactly where we're going, you would never consider packing your bags in the first place."

There were a lot of words that's threatening to spill from her mouth (not good ones, that's for sure) but instead of lashing out at him, she took a couple of deep breaths, pinched the bridge of her nose and composed herself before saying,

"Can you at least tell me where we're going?"

Barry gave a cheeky smile at her resolve. She almost smacked his face and would be really glad to do so if it wasn't for the promise she made with a little girl that she's painstakingly trying to keep.

"We're going to visit someone important."

"Who?"

"You'll know when we get there."

Caitlin is determined to implore a bit further but the sound of her phone ringing diverts her attention almost instantly. She let out a heavy sigh before answering, clearly wasn't amused for yet another call from her secretary.

Barry, on the other hand, was carefully watching her from the corner of his eye. He knew she's been receiving calls from the office ever since she took a leave and her expression seemed to darken more and more every time the calls came a bit too frequently the longer her absence is becoming.

As soon as she dropped her phone in her purse, he gently put a hand on her knee and asked,

"Everything okay, babe?"

She has gotten used to him calling her in such an affectionate way to the point where she eventually stopped calling him out of it. She wouldn't admit it to him, or even to herself for that matter, but she finds comfort with his words, filling her with a sense of familiarity.

In all honesty, she didn't know whether it was a good thing or a bad thing. Being this close to someone again and actually feeling okay with it (something she didn't know was possible in such a short period of time, especially when you take all the pain she's been through into consideration), is still a huge puzzle for her to solve, deciphering it piece by piece in a way she only knows how.

"Yeah. It's Secretary Jones, filling me in with the happenings back at the office. Just her regular updates."

She shrugs, but he knew better than to believe her words when her actions tell a whole different story. He's perfectly aware of how hard she tries to hide her worries about the company she left behind when she decided to spend a whole month with him but he knows her too well for him not to notice.

"Well, we haven't gone that far from Central City so if you want maybe we could go back?"

Her head snaps at his direction, surprised by his sudden change of heart. He's been bugging her for a few days convincing her to agree but now, all of a sudden, he wanted to go back. She knows exactly why he's doing this so she just smiled at him, thinking that maybe this is what she needs after all.

"No, it's okay. I'll deal with it when we get back. I'm sure it can wait."

"You're sure?"

"Yes."

"Cause if not, just tell me. It can be more serious than you think and I don't want to be the reason for holding you back. I know your company needs you and-"

"Barry."

"And I haven't told you this but I really am grateful that you actually decided to spend a whole month with me despite your busy schedule-"

"Barry."

"And I really want to make the most out of it since day one and now that we only have a week left I thought it's better that we-"

"Bartholomew!"

"Wha-yes?"

"I already told you, it's okay. Stop babbling and slow down a bit."

"Oh yeah. Sorry." He says, shooting her an apologetic smile and taking a deep breath then he asked, "Better?"

"I mean you're literally over speeding."

"Oh! I certainly didn't realize that."

"Well, remind me not to make a nervous wreck out of you whenever we're on the road."

They both chuckled at that, letting the comfortable atmosphere settle in. For the last couple of days, they've been building this kind of connection. It was never foreign, it was like retracing their footsteps back until they both reach the point where their paths crossed for the very first time.

They're still far from being halfway, not even close. But they're taking it one step at a time, slowly but surely.

"So care to tell me now who are we visiting?"

"You're not gonna let this go, are you?"

"Nope."

"Well, Dr. Snow, we are going to visit my dad."

"Your... dad? I thought he was in jail." She replied, a crease forming between her brows.

"He was. He got out a year ago with the help of my boss Oliver Queen. He's got a badass lawyer. I can tell you that."

"Wait. By Oliver Queen, you don't actually mean _the_ Oliver Queen, right?"

"The one and only."

Caitlin's expression was a mixture of shock and disbelief. She only met him once when she attended a business conference in Star City and saying that she was amazed is an understatement.

Oliver Queen, to her, is a pro when it comes to his field. She learned a lot from him, especially that she was just starting in the business that time. Oh and how can she forget his remarkably bubbly wife Felicity, one of the few people she actually felt comfortable being acquainted with.

"It must be a dream, huh? Working with him?"

"Definitely. He's not just my boss, he also became one of my closest friends."

"Then why did you leave? It was such a great opportunity, Barry."

"What? Working with him or just being so close to him?" He said, sending her a teasing smile.

"You know which one I'm talking about."

"Of course I do. Don't worry, I won't tell him about your huge crush on him."

"I don't have a crush on him. That's absurd."

"Cait, trust me I know you. That smile you had when I mentioned his name is the same one you have whenever I'm close to you."

"So you're saying I have a _huge_ crush on you too?" She replied, her tone clearly mocking him.

"Nope. You're obsessed with me."

"You're confidence is really something, isn't it Mr. Allen?"

"Probably why you're so into me, Dr. Snow."

Barry smiled and winked at her. She knows he's teasing her but it doesn't mean she can't tease him back. Two can certainly play at that game.

"You know what? I think you're right."

"What can I say? I'm simply irresistible-"

"No, no, I wasn't talking about that. I was talking about my huge crush on Oliver Queen. I mean, what's not to like? He's got a handsome face, hot body and his eyes, gosh they were so dreamy-"

"Okay, stop right there. I know you don't mean any of that. His eyes are not dreamy. They're dull and sometimes scary. I know because I've seen it up close."

"And here I thought I was the one with the huge crush on him."

"Whatever, Cait. For your information he's married and I'm pretty sure he's not into brunettes."

She let out a laugh at that, clearly amused by his reaction to her teasing. He's gripping the steering wheel a bit tighter, tension evident on his shoulders. His stance making her giggle more so he asked,

"What's so funny?"

"Nothing. You're supposed to be the one teasing me and now you're jealous."

"What?! Me? Jealous? I don't get jealous, Cait."

"Really? So you won't mind if I ask for his number then?"

"And why would you ask for that?"

"It's personal I can't tell you."

"Then I'm not giving it to you."

"Because you're totally jealous."

"I'm not! Okay? I'm just... just hurt because I actually left my job in Star City for you and now you seem to like him better than me just because his eyes are dreamy."

Barry's starting to act like a child, definitely a first for Caitlin to see. She didn't know he had this side which she actually finds adorable. And the fact the he told her that he came back for her, even if that meant leaving some important parts of his life, makes her heart swell a bit more.

"Oh, Barry. You're so adorable."

"There's nothing you can say to make me feel better now. I'm hurt and that's all because of you." He says, clutching the part of his shirt near his heart in exaggeration. But she just rolled her eyes at his actions.

"Even if I tell you that I actually prefer your mesmerizing eyes than his?"

"Really?" He asked, his sulking expression erased in an instant at her words.

"No, of course not. There's nothing I can say, right?"

"You're worse than a wicked witch, Dr. Snow."

"Did I hurt your feelings again, Mr. Allen?"

"Yeah, you did. But seriously babe, I know you love my eyes. You used to tell me that before."

"People change. And so do their preferences." She shrugged.

Now it was his turn to laugh, reminiscing the way she would make him work hard for her compliments. She may not have her memories yet but at least pieces of her old self are starting to find their way back to her.

And maybe, that's all that matters.

"What?"

"Nothing. You say that people change but certainly some things remain the same."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, before you lost your memories you certainly wasn't the type to give compliments so easily. Kinda like what you're doing right now."

"Then I guess that's a good thing, right?"

"You returning to your old self, yes. You not giving me compliments, well, no."

They fell into a fit of laughter once again. Things may not always seem to go their way but as long as they are together, even if a lot has changed, everything's going to be alright.

They're going to be alright.

* * *

It's almost 10 o'clock when they arrive at their destination. Caitlin let her eyes wander at the surroundings, realizing that they were indeed at a secluded beach. A few meters from the shore stands a vacation house. It wasn't that grand but it's simple and cozy, just the way she likes it.

"So what do you think?" He asked when he noticed Caitlin staring off at a far distance, a smile creeping up her face.

"It's beautiful, Barry."

"I'm glad you like it."

They made their way into the house after Barry had brought their bags in. The interior is as beautiful as it is outside, spacy and perfect for relaxation. A voice called out from the living room, catching Caitlin's attention by it's familiarity.

"Hey, slugger."

 _Slugger_.

Why does that word seem so familiar?

A vision flashed in Caitlin's mind, accompanied by an abrupt pounding in her head. It's almost there, so close within her grasp. Slugger...hey, slugger!

She remembers.

A bit.

It was like dreaming all over again but this time with her eyes open. It's more vivid, more detailed and although she knew it was him, the boy from her dreams, it's still different because now she can actually see him.

The 11-year old Cait calling out to the 11-year old Barry, a popsicle she held over his cheek and the warmness that the memory brought when she remembered the time when she can smile genuinely, without the weight of loss, of betrayal, of pain.

The feeling was exhilarating, emotions clouding her already blurry mind. But as soon as it started, it was gone just like that.

"Cait, I want you to meet my dad-hey, you okay?" He asked when he noticed her frame, one hand gripping a nearby furniture tightly and the other rubbing the side of her head.

"Yeah. I'm just a little tired from the trip, I guess."

"Caitlin? Everything okay?" Henry asked as he emerged from the living room. He's looking at her intently, his doctor instincts kicking in.

"Yes. Thank you for asking, sir."

"You don't need to be so formal. We've met a couple times before. And I must say, you looked more beautiful than the last time I saw you." Henry said, stepping forward to give her a reassuring hug.

"Oh, thank you. I'm sorry I don't remember you Mr. Allen. But please don't take it personally. I'm pretty sure I don't remember anyone for that matter." She replied jokingly, trying to lighten the mood which she succeeded in when she saw Henry laughing with her.

"Barry told me about it. I'm just glad the accident spared your sense of humor." He replied, making Caitlin giggle a bit. "And please just call me Henry but I would actually prefer if you'd start calling me dad. I'm pretty sure it would lead to that since Barry's been very insistent-"

"Dad!" Barry exclaimed, hoping his blushing face wasn't so evident. "Cait, don't mind him. It's nothing believe me."

"Son, there's nothing to be embarrassed about con-"

"Dad, please stop talking." Barry said. His face almost turning white as he tries to hide his embarrassment in which, much to his demise, they only laughed at.

"Alright, I'm done. By the way, did you get the supplies I asked you?"

"About that...it must've slipped my mind. I'm just gonna go get them now. I've spotted a grocery store a couple of miles from here. I'll be right back." He said as he grabbed his keys and bolted out of the door. A second later, he came back as he peeked through the half open door and asked,

"You gonna be okay here, babe?" He asked, shooting a worried glance towards Caitlin.

"Yeah, don't worry."

"Go on, slugger. I'll look after her."

"Thanks. But please no more embarrassing stuff."

"Just go and we promise not to talk about you a lot."

Barry nodded to his dad and gave one last look at Caitlin before closing the door and heading out. Henry guided Caitlin to the living room where she settled on the sofa comfortably.

"Caitlin, you want anything to drink?"

"Just water please."

"Wait here. I'll go get it."

"Thank you."

A moment later, Henry emerged from the kitchen with a tray of cookies and two glasses of cold water. Caitlin gave him her thanks as he settled on the armchair across her.

"You know I haven't seen him that happy in a long time. I'm really glad you decided to give him a chance. Thank you Caitlin." He started, looking at her with utmost gratitude.

"There's no need to thank me. I'm just as grateful for having his company even for a short period of time."

"You have such good effect on him. You may not even remember but you helped him through a lot when he was younger. You know, he never failed to mention you whenever he visited me. You're all his able to talk about."

Caitlin sensed the feeling of a familiar warmth enveloping her when she heard his words. She didn't even understand it but the display of love he had for his son had a comforting effect on her.

"I must say, your son has been helping me too. He's determined to help me regain my memories but he doesn't know he did a lot more than that. I've never told him but he's...he's helping me get through this pain and I... I may not even know how to start the process of healing if it wasn't for him. I think I'm just grateful to have him too, even if he's such a pain most of the time."

The words falling out of her mouth without permission and it feels foreign as well as it is honest. She never thought she could actually think of someone like this again after all she's been through but Barry, albeit a grade A pain in the ass, made it all possible.

"My son is very lucky to have you too. The first time I saw you together I know you two are meant to be. So Caitlin, if a father could ask, please don't let anything come between you and Barry. May it be the accident, or other people and most especially your memory loss. I'm a doctor just like you but beyond that I do believe that the mind does forget but the heart certainly cannot."

"I... I'm just not sure how to be his Cait without my memories. I don't know if I can get them all back and I just... didn't want to disappoint him if it does not. I don't want him to get hurt."

"I'm sure Barry knew all the risks he might face when he offered to help you. He's very well aware that maybe you won't be able to remember at all that's why he never put his bet on that in the first place."

"I don't understand. He's been working so hard to help me remember despite his knowledge that maybe all his effort could go to waste. I just don't get it. Why would he do such a thing?"

"Because Caitlin, he always had faith in love, in _you_.

Caitlin was speechless for a while. She didn't know that this is what's going through his head ever since. How can she be so blind? How can she be so naïve? Pain has numb her senses too much she didn't realize her sight was one which had been affected the most.

She remembered when she first asked him the question of why he's doing this and now the answer's right in front of her. The only problem is that it's too big and heavy, so full and very much detailed she can only grasp so much.

Maybe because it wasn't meant to be understood, it wasn't meant to be labeled, to be contained in such a little space as the human heart. Love, she realizes, doesn't have to be put behind her own boundaries, doesn't have to be limited only in her own understanding.

Love is something you really can't define, it defines you. So, much to her own surprise, she lets it. She's aware of the possibility that her memories will never gonna come back but the thought of it doesn't terrify her anymore than it used to.

She used to think that it's the only way to get her self-identity back but actually, it's not just the memories that makes a person. It's with the way you think, you feel, you behave. And memories are just products of these little things, things that you choose every moment of everyday of your life.

And maybe she was very much convinced in retrieving the things that once were lost she has forgotten she can always make new ones, better ones.

So she does.

"Henry?"

"Hmm?"

"Thank you."

* * *

The next day, Caitlin woke up as soon as the first morning light found its way through the windows of her room. She always enjoyed moments like this, peace and quiet accompanied by the soft breeze from the beach. She admired the view from the balcony until she decided to wash up and start the day.

She threw on her silk robe over her night gown before heading down the stairs. She's greeted by the sight of Barry, humming happily to himself while flipping pancakes, clad only in his shorts and an apron.

"Those pancakes look delicious."

"Cait! I didn't know you were up." He said a bit startled.

"Well, obviously I am. Where's Henry?"

"He had to run an errand. He wouldn't be back until later or maybe tomorrow."

"Oh, okay. Do you need some help?"

"No, I can manage. But you should go back to your room."

"Why? I just got up and I wanted to have breakfast first before I shower."

"Yeah that's why you need to go back. You're supposed to have breakfast in bed. I didn't get up this early just to get my plan ruined. So go back to your room and pretend you were asleep and forget that you saw pancakes. It's supposed to be a surprise." He said, pointing the spatula at her while he leaned back on the kitchen counter.

"Technically, it's not a surprise anymore because I've seen it already."

"That's why I'm asking you to forget about it and go upstairs."

"I'm already here so why can't we just have breakfast here? I don't want crumbs on my bed, okay?"

"Baby, why do you have to be so stubborn? Sometimes I wish the accident took that one instead of your memories."

"Mr. Allen, that's just foul."

"I'm sorry Dr. Snow but sometimes I can't help it. Now, for the last time, can you please just get back to bed?"

"Make me." She said, crossing her arms in front of her as she raised a challenging brow at him.

Barry let out a heavy sigh before shaking his head then said, "Fine, you left me with no choice."

He grabbed her by the waist and with one swift motion, she was thrown back over his shoulder. It took her a moment to realize what has happened but as soon as it settled in she starts pounding on his back and shouted,

"Barry! Put me down!"

"You asked for this Cait. I wanted to play nice but you were being so difficult."

When they reached her bedroom, he threw her on the bed but she had been latching on to him that he ended up falling on top of her. His face was buried on her chest and it took a while before he regained some strength to slowly pull away from her.

Their bodies were so close and the fact that they have too little clothes between them certainly didn't help the situation. Barry's apron was nowhere to be found and Caitlin's robe was untied both due to her thrashing moments ago.

They made the mistake of looking into each other's eyes because the second they did, they were trapped in a bubble of emotion. Neither of them moved, not until Caitlin said,

"Barry..."

"Hm?" He hummed in response, his eyes traveling down to her lips.

"I think you left the stove on." She whispered and as soon as he heard it, he bolted out of the room and went downstairs but not before saying,

"Oh right! Just don't move, I'll be right back."

Caitlin, for once, did as she was told. She didn't move not because he asked her to but because she was too stunned to do so. Her own hearbeat is the only thing she hears in her rather quiet room, a small smile creeping up her face. And maybe, her heart has always been ready, for him.

She just doesn't realize it yet.

True to his words, Barry went upstairs with a breakfast tray, a single rose placed at the side of it. He took the space beside Caitlin and unlike before, she didn't even put a word of protest when he started feeding her a piece of pancake.

* * *

"So what do you want to do first? Hiking, swimming, snorkeling, anything?"

"Wait, no bringing back my memories plan for today?"

"Nah, I think it's best if we could take a break from all that. Let's have a relaxing day. You know, just you and me."

Caitlin raised a curious brow at his mention of you and me, making Barry turn into a babbling mess yet again.

"Not _you_ and _me_ like we're together. I mean, you and me without... without all the stress and worries and it's not that I don't want us to be together-wait forget that I said that. What I meant was-"

"Barry, I know what you mean. And to be honest I totally agree with you."

Caitlin said, staring directly into his eyes and Barry almost tumbled upon his own words at her reply.

"You... you want us to be together too?" He asked a bit too hopeful.

"I wasn't talking about that, silly. I was actually pertaining to the relaxing day you mentioned. I think I really need that."

"Right... that's great." He said, disappointment evident on his face.

"I was thinking we could go to the beach today? I haven't been in one for ages."

"Yeah sure."

"I'll just pack my bag and get ready. I'll meet you outside in thirty."

He nodded and watched as she excitedly went upstairs. Sometimes he really wasn't aware of what's coming out of his mouth and most of the time, it leaves him in such state of embarrassment. But as long as it's with Caitlin, it's okay.

He'll just have to be patient a little longer.

Barry had already set the beach umbrella up, laid the foldable chairs under it and set the cooler and food basket at the center. He was just waiting for Caitlin to finish changing which, for him, had already been ages since she left.

He settled on his chair, sunglasses on as he stretched his whole body in a comfortable position. A few minutes later, he spotted Caitlin walking towards him, looking so incredibly hot in her dark red bikini.

"Did you bring a sunblock? It's too hot out there I don't want to risk having sunburn."

"You're way hotter I'm literally starting to melt." He mumbled.

"What?"

"Nothing. Water?"

She nodded and took the bottle of water he offered. Everything started in slow motion when Caitlin drank from the bottle, a single drop falling into her collarbone and Barry, having already removed his sunglasses, was weak to resist the urge to follow the droplet traveling in such a tantalizing slow pace down to her-

"Barry?"

"Yeah?"

"Are you even listening?"

"Yeah, of course. What are we talking about again?" Caitlin just rolled her eyes at him.

"Sunblock?"

"Oh right. I'll be right back."

Barry jogged to the house, grabbed the bottle of sunblock and went running back to their spot at the beach.

He swore he wasn't gone for a good ten minutes and now some guy was already flirting with his Cait. Really? What's with these men to actually have the audacity to think that Caitlin is some average girl who will easily fall for their _charm?_

He wanted them to know how wonderful she is and she's way too special to be treated like some other girl. That he can attest to all that because he'd known her ever since and that he used to be the only one to coax that beautiful smile from her.

But he does none of it. Because he knew he doesn't have the right anymore.

She wasn't his anymore.

He sighed as he made his way back to her, trying to conceal the heaviness he's feeling inside.

"Babe, I got your sunblock." He managed to put up a smile, one that does not make the corner of his eyes crinkle.

"Thanks."

"Who was that?"

"Who?"

"That incredibly handsome guy with a body complete with dashboard abs and all."

"Barry, you sound so gay." She said, giggles coming out of her mouth.

Her giggles soon died down and she's met with an unusually silent Barry Allen.

"Everything okay, Barry?"

"Yeah." He said and Caitlin noticed that there's something bothering him. She didn't push any further but she decided to cheer him up so she asked,

"I'm going for a swim. You coming?"

"You go ahead. I'm just gonna stay here."

"But who's gonna help me build a sandcastle?" She beamed at him but he only flashed her a sad smile and replied,

"I'm sure there are a lot of other men who would willingly help you build a sandcastle, Cait."

The heavy feeling accompanying his words didn't go unnoticed by her. Now, she perfectly understands where he was coming from. This arrangement they had between them has a lot of unspoken rules, concealed consequences that they had been good at ignoring since day one.

They both know that if you gambled everything, especially the most fragile part of you such as the heart, there will always be casualties, setbacks and sometimes even the most unexpected can happen, and it may leave a boring hole in that sacred place where your heart once was.

Good thing there's always this positive side in things, the utopia.

Where the road is narrower, less traveled. The journey, longer and sometimes it'll make you feel like it's never ending. But if you are determined, with a willpower stronger than that of the average, you'll manage to get through.

But it will only happen if you have a purpose worth fighting for.

Someone, who you might even say, worth dying for.

Caitlin studied his frame one more time and it almost killed her that she wasn't able to see how tired he looked, how weary he's becoming. She knew he wouldn't say anything, dare not complain and it just makes the knife already stuck in her heart twist a bit deeper.

He's long been waiting, patiently keeping his distance as he was told and who was she to make him suffer longer? Didn't he share the same pain she's been selfishly claiming as her own?

If there's one thing she'll get after coming out of this deal, it's the realization that this man, sitting before her, is someone worth fighting for.

Barry Allen is worth fighting for.

"What happened with 'just you and me'?"

Caitlin asked and somehow, it managed to put a genuine smile on his face.

"I thought you weren't very amused with that idea."

"I never said that." She smiled at him.

"Wait, so you mean... you.."

"We don't have to talk about this right now. The beach is right there, Barry. Come on!"

"But-"

"I'll race you!"

Before he could grab her hand, she was already halfway to the water, taking the attention of men with her every step. It was just the push he needed as he ran after her. She immediately submerged in the water and as soon as she emerged, he grabbed her from behind, making her squeal.

"I got you!"

"Barry, let me go!"

"Only if you tell me when can we talk about it."

"And here I thought you're willing to wait until whenever."

"I am. But you already gave me the go signal so there's no way I'm spending a single second without you."

"Were you always this cheesy?"

"What can I say? I'm your sappy romantic." He whispered hotly in her ear, sending electricity throughout her body.

"Why do I get a bad feeling about this?" She leaned back to him as she felt his arms tightening around her waist.

"Of course you don't. I promise you won't regret it."

"Fine."

"So when can we talk about this?"

"How about tomorrow? At dinner?"

"That's just perfect."

* * *

The next day went by so fast. They just decided to stay home and had a movie marathon while Henry prepared food. He insisted on cooking since they are his guests and he wouldn't just take no for an answer.

Barry secretly asked for Henry's help to discreetly divert Caitlin's attention so he can properly prepare for their dinner date. Tonight's gonna be the night so he wanted it to be special.

When Caitlin and Henry got back from the tour from the other side of the beach, he immediately asked Caitlin to prepare for their date while he did the same. He's a nervous wreck and he certainly couldn't believe that this is happening.

They both been through a lot and he actually hoped for a better turn of events in their lives but he knew it was all in the past and there's nothing he could do about it. He's just grateful, because after all that's happened, after all the ups and downs, they finally made their way back to each other.

Barry stopped at Caitlin's door and took a few deep breaths before deciding to knock. He can hear some noises coming from her room like she was talking to the phone with someone. He wasn't exactly sure but she somehow sounded upset and stressed about something.

He didn't want anything to ruin this night so he softly knocked on her door when he realized that she already ended the call. He waited a few seconds before she opened it. She's wearing a light yellow sundress that went just above her knees and white sandals that perfectly fit her outfit.

"You look amazing. Are you ready?"

"Yeah just let me grab my shawl. I'll be downstairs in a bit."

"Okay."

He proceeded downstairs and waited for her in the living room. His dad giving him words of encouragements and assurances that somehow help him calm down a bit.

When he heard her footsteps going down the stairs, he unconsciously straightened out the nonexistent crinkles on his white long-sleeved shirt that he paired up with white beach shorts.

He took her hand as they made their way to the shore where he set up a table together with a blanket that he laid on the sand. He felt Caitlin's hand tug his and he noticed that she stopped walking so he asked,

"Everything okay, Cait?"

"Barry, there's something I need to tell you."

"Can't it wait? We're almost at our destination."

"It's urgent and I want to tell you now because I don't want to give you the wrong impression-"

"Hey, whatever it is I'm sure I will understand. But now let's just enjoy our dinner date, okay?"

"Okay."

"Good. Now close your eyes."

"Do I have to?"

"Cait." He said, giving her a warning tone.

"Alright. Geez, why are you so uptight tonight, Mr. Allen?"

"That's because I'm so nervous right now, Dr. Snow."

She laughed at that and gave him a teasing remark about it but he just let it slide. He slowly guided her down the shore until they reach that certain spot of the beach.

"Open your eyes."

As soon as Caitlin did, her eyes were greeted by a trail of lighted candles leading to a small table near the edge of the water. It was surrounded by another set of candles forming a circle and rose petals were scattered all over the place.

"Do you like it?"

"Barry, this is amazing."

"Shall we?"

"Sure."

Caitlin took his outstretched hand yet again as they made their way to the table. A waiter went and served the appetizer much to Caitlin's delight.

"How did you manage to pull this off in such a short period of time?"

"Trust me, I'm a pro at this."

"In what? In pulling off grand romantic cheesy gestures? Because I can certainly give you that."

"That's one but I perform best at making you feel like a gushing schoolgirl deep inside."

"You wish. I don't gush and I certainly wasn't that type when I was that young."

"How would you know that? You don't even remember that phase in your life."

"I just know, okay?"

"Really? So why don't we run a test to see if that's true?"

"What test?"

"Well, you always had the same reaction when I kiss that sensitive spot in your neck. That's totally your schoolgirl activator."

"My what?! Barry, you're disgusting."

"Aww, is that a blush I see Dr. Snow?"

"I don't blush, Mr. Allen."

"I actually have a different test for that but it requires... a more private place than this but if you really want to know-"

"Shut up."

After they are done with the three-course meal, Barry called over a violinist and Caitlin was just impressed by how he came up with all these to even speak a word of gratitude. He held out a hand and asked,

"May I have this dance?"

"Sure."

They were swaying to the rhythm of the music, both of them falling into a comfortable silence in each other's embrace. Caitlin felt that familiar feeling once again but it didn't escalate the way she wanted it to be.

The violinist finished the song and they both thanked him as he made his way back. He bowed at them, wishing them a good night.

Barry lead her to the blanket laid out near the water. He took a sitting position and urged Caitlin to take the space between his legs as he wrapped his arms around her waist and settled his chin above her shoulder.

"I really enjoyed tonight, Cait."

"Me too. And I want you to know you're responsible for that so thank you."

"I should be the one thanking you for giving this a chance, for... giving _us_ a chance."

"Barry?"

"Yeah?"

"I think I'm starting to remember."

"Really? That's just great baby." He said, kissing her cheek for he couldn't contain his happiness.

"I'm actually having second thoughts about telling you because I didn't want to give you false hope and I'm just afraid that-"

"Hey, look at me." He placed a finger underneath her chin to make her look at him. He shifted her a bit so she was almost facing him.

"Is this what you want to tell me earlier?"

"It's one of the things but I have something else to say."

"Like I told you, I would understand okay? And please don't think that I might get disappointed if your memories don't come back at all. Of course I wanted you to regain them for I know it can help you a lot. But I wouldn't lie, there were so many times that I wished for my Cait to come back so badly but I also told myself that maybe it's never going to happen."

"That's what I'm afraid of, Barry. I'm scared of giving this a chance because I wasn't the same person you fell in love before. I'm afraid that maybe, you're just holding on to the hope that I can somehow be your Cait again."

"Don't ever think that way again, okay? You know when I came back for you and I learned that you were married and didn't even remember me, I almost died that day. I almost lost you to the accident three years ago and the pain it caused me is almost unbearable but it was nothing compared to the pain I experienced when you asked me if we have met before."

"I'm so sorry, Barry."

"Hey, that's not your fault. You don't have to say you're sorry. That time, I almost came to the point of giving up on you but I know deep inside that I couldn't. You know why?"

"Why?"

"Because whenever I look at you, whenever I hear your voice, I know that's it's still you Cait. Cisco always offered to take care of your husband back then you know." That earned him a chuckle from her.

"Really?"

"Yeah. But I kept telling him no although I know he was just joking. I've always kept my faith and when you said you weren't married in the first place, that's when I know that we're always meant to be together."

"I should've listened to your father. He was right."

"Really? What did he tell you?"

"He told me that I shouldn't be worried about you if it happens that my memories won't come back for good. He said that you never really vouched for it and that you always had faith in love, in... me."

"There's really a point when I didn't see my Cait in you. But what can I say? You have a hold in my heart that I can't get out of even if I wanted to. You'll always be the girl I fell in love with and will always be the one I'll choose to fall in love in everyday of my life. And, well, I guess that's really _my Cait_. It's you."

By this time, Caitlin couldn't contain her tears anymore. It's flowing freely down her cheeks and Barry's thumb wasn't fast enough to stop them from dripping to his shirt (not that he minded though). He held her tightly, kissing her forehead as few tears managed to escape his eyes as well.

"Barry?"

"Yeah?"

"There's something... I need you to understand. I know that this is the worst timing but they need me there... I need to be there."

"Cait, just relax and take a deep breath."

Caitlin did as she was told and after a few minutes she managed to stop the tears from flowing and somehow composed herself.

"There has been some complications with the company and it was more serious than I thought it was."

"Okay. Well, do you need help? I'm sure S.T.A.R. Labs would be fine without me for-"

"No, it's not like that but thank you. The thing is, I might need a bit more of your patience."

"Sure. But why?"

"Because Barry... I'm leaving."

* * *

 **END OF PART SEVENTEEN**


	18. Chapter 18

_"Because Barry... I'm leaving."_

 _"What? You're just messing with me, right?" He says as he turned her around a bit so she was half facing him._

 _"I wish I am but I'm not. My secretary called and she said that one of the major stockholders is planning to quit and I need to convince them not to." She says, worry showing on her face._

 _"But why so sudden? I mean your company's fine, right?"_

 _"For now, it is. It's just that when my father passed away, most of his trusted business partners became hesitant about continuing their partnership with us. They're not very much pleased with me taking over since I don't have a background in the business proper and they think I'm too young to take on the responsibilities."_

 _"But you've got it covered, right? You're the most brilliant person I know. I'm sure you can singlehandedly run such thing."_

 _"Well, I'm doing my best but the thing is... when I... I mean this-"_

 _"What is it?"_

 _"It's... nothing. You don't have to worry about it." She tried to give him a small smile but Barry knew her way better than that. If there's one thing that her loss of memory didn't change, it's her habit of thinking of others before herself._

 _"This is about this, right?"_

 _Barry knew that her month-long leave is something that bothers her more than she wants to show and he couldn't help but feel more guilty than before._

 _"I'm so sorry Cait, I shouldn't have-"_

 _"Hey, it's okay. I agreed on this too, alright? You have nothing to blame yourself for, you understand?" She looked at him straight in the eyes, making him see the sincerity in her own._

 _"But-"_

 _"Barry, I'm serious."_

 _"Alright, fine. I just hope... I just hope it didn't have to be this way, you know? I mean, why can't we just be together without all these... complications."_

 _"Yeah. But for what it's worth, I'm happy to say that I don't have any regrets."_

 _"You really mean that?"_

 _Caitlin nodded as she scooted closer to Barry. The breeze coming from the sea growing colder as the night progresses._

 _"For the first time I didn't have any regrets trusting someone again. You...well, you made that possible."_

 _"Anything for you, Cait." He says as he moved one arm to go around her shoulder while Caitlin rested her head on his shoulder._

 _"When are you leaving?" He whispered. She takes a deep breath before answering,_

 _"As soon as possible. There's a business convention in Emerald City next week and they're all gonna be there. If I want to make it in time I should get back to Central City by tomorrow, pack my things and hopefully there's still a vacancy for a flight the next day."_

 _"Wow, I didn't know it was that urgent."_

 _"Unfortunately, it is. So I was actually hoping if... that would be okay with you?" She said, removing her head on his shoulder to properly look at him._

 _"Yeah. But how long does it going to take?"_

 _"My secretary gave me a tentative timeframe but from what I understood, around 3-4 months?"_

 _"That long?"_

 _"Yes but that's only if things went according to plan. Because if not I'm afraid I have to extend my stay there."_

 _"Well... okay. I'm sure Cisco will be pretty bummed when he knows I'll extend my leave but I'm pretty sure he'll agree. He's actually vouch-"_

 _"What? You're not going to extend your leave, Barry."_

 _"Of course I am. How on earth will I be able to accompany you if-"_

 _"That's the point, Barry. You're not going to because I refuse to let you come with me."_

 _"Why not? Emerald City is too far, Cait. And you being there for long-actually, even just a day without you is hard enough for me. So how do you expect me to handle that?" His voice getting a bit louder as he refused to let the matter go without putting much of a fight._

 _"Look Barry, I know what I'm asking of you wasn't easy but somehow I get the feeling that I need to do this alone." She tried explaining in a way that would not make him take her words the wrong way. When he just looked at her intently she continued,_

 _"So much has happened in such a short period of time and I think that I... I need some time to let that all sink in."_

 _"But I can always help you, right?"_

 _"That's the thing, Barry. You've really been a great help but there are some things I need to figure out on my own. And maybe this trip away-"_

 _"Wait, are you saying that you're still not sure about this? About us?" He asked, brow furrowing in the process._

 _"No, no, of course I am. I just... I just didn't want to be unfair to you." She said as she placed both of her hands on his shoulders, trying to ease the tension visibly weighing on them._

 _"Cait, I don't understand."_

 _"Barry, if-if I want to do this with you and mind you, I really do, I just want to be as ready as you are. I know you've been waiting for me for a long time and I just can't bear to be with you thinking that I can only give you part of myself." Caitlin moved her hands from his shoulders to either side of his face, sincerity shining in her eyes._

 _"I want to be honest with you, Barry. I'm still in the process of... healing, of completing myself and if I'm going to be with you... I want to give you my everything."_

 _At her words, Barry was speechless. He wanted so much to voice his appreciation that it almost seemed impossible to find the right words. So he did one thing that could express his feelings more than words can do. He drew her closer to him as he enveloped her in a tight hug._

 _"Oh, Cait..." He whispered to her ear so very delicately she closes her eyes at the sound of it._

 _"You don't know how much your words mean to me. You don't have...any idea just how much you're making me feel right now." He choked on his own words as tears started flowing freely from his eyes. Caitlin must've sensed it because she moved slightly away from him to make eye contact._

 _"Mr. Allen you're such a crybaby." She said as it was her turn to wipe his tears with her thumb. He just chuckled at her as he noticed that she wasn't in such a better state than him, trying not to cry herself._

 _Caitlin buried her face on his neck this time, revelling in his scent. She made a mental note to remember this particular smell, one that's completely Barry Allen._

Her _Barry Allen._

 _Now, that doesn't sound so bad, does it?_

 _"So are you gonna let me go?" She whispered._

 _"Only if you promise that this is going to be the last time."_

 _"I promise."_

 _"But what if you...don't come back? What if something-" She cut him off as she once again looked straight into his eyes._

 _"Barry, let's just be positive about this, okay? And if I don't come back then you can always sue me for not abiding by the contract. We still have like three days left, right?"_

 _"Yeah. But I won't sue you for that. I'm going to sue you for theft." He said, a sly smile making its way to his features._

 _"Theft? That's such a shame because I never stole anything." She grinned back._

 _"Yeah, you did. It's right here, you see?" He pointed his index finger just above his heart and said,_

 _"You kinda stole my heart, Dr. Snow." Then he gave her his famous boyish smile together with a teasing wink._

 _"I should've seen that coming. I mean that's totally the oldest punchline in the book. You're not just a crybaby Mr. Allen, you're still such a sappy romantic, do you realize that?" She's trying to sound serious but the huge smile forming on her lips prevented her from doing so._

 _"You just can't be my sweet girl, can you? You could've just said, 'Oh but you stole my heart too, Mr. Allen' but nooooo. You said things that are so not close to being sweet."_

 _"Aww, I'm so sorry baby."_

 _"And now you're mocking me? What's wrong with you, Dr. Snow?" He crossed his arms and pouted his lips, his head turning away from her._

 _"You're adorable, you know that?"_

 _"Really? Adorable? That's how far you can go?" He said, sulking further like a kid._

 _"Tell you what. Maybe in our time apart, I could learn how to be your sweet girl. How's that?" She replied, trying to soothe a five-year old Barry._

 _"Fine. Just don't you dare practice it with someone else Cait because I swear, I'm flying to Emerald City whether you like it or not."_

 _"What do you think of me, Barry? I'm absolutely not that kind of woman."_

 _"I know. I just wanted to be sure. I didn't wait this long just to have you slip through my fingers again."_

 _She took his words more seriously than she should. She knew he wasn't one to demand even if he had all the right to do so. He's always been giving to the point where he forgets to save some for himself. So, could she really blame him for expressing his heart's desire and actually ask? Of course not so she assured him by saying,_

 _"I promise you won't lose me again, okay? We'll get through this together." She said and he nodded before replying,_

 _"I'm going to miss you so much, Cait."_

 _"I'm going to miss you, too."_

 _They stayed in each other's embrace for the longest moment, whispering words of comfort, exchanging heartfelt phrases that they would hold on to for their impending temporary separation._

 _"Since you're going away...can I...well, you don't have to do it if you're not ready. I mean-I'd understand if-"_

 _"Barry, just say it."_

 _"Can I...at least get a kiss goodbye? Just in case you don't come back. I mean, you should come back, you must. But I can't help but get worried still, you know?" He asked sheepishly, blush creeping up his face as he rubbed the back of his neck._

 _"A kiss?" She asked and he nodded, still not looking at her._

 _"Sure." She replied nonchalantly._

 _"Seriously?" His eyes widened in disbelief._

 _"Seriously. Now, close your eyes."_

 _Barry braced himself for what was bound to happen. He's been waiting for this moment for almost four years now and now that it's actually going to happen, now that his Cait is back in his arms, now that they can be together after all they've been through, he still couldn't believe that every single thing is true. But when he felt her breath tickling his face, he was sure that this is not just a dream. He waited patiently until he felt her lips on his-_

 _Forehead? What the-_

 _"Cait! That's unfair. You-"_

 _"Before you say anything further, that's technically a kiss."_

 _"What am I? Your grandfather?"_

 _Caitlin giggled at Barry's reaction. His face is a mixture of frustration, disbelief and disappointment._

 _"Well, if you're worried that I won't come back then I'm also afraid that you won't be here when I do. So I'm just gonna give you this." She said and kissed his forehead again. "And this." She kissed both of his cheeks. "Then this." She kissed his nose, their lips only inches apart. "But this..." She said as she looked at his slightly parted lips. "That's gonna have to wait."_

 _"Such a tease, Dr. Snow."_

 _"It's called a bargain, Mr. Allen. Remember I'm a businesswoman." She winked at him and got up and before Barry could even register what was happening, she was running along the shore, her giggles filling in the silence of the night. He rushed after her immediately, stumbling upon his own feet at his eagerness._

 _She's back._

 _His Cait is definitely back._

* * *

"Dude, seriously! Take one more step and I won't hesitate to shoot you with the cold gun." Cisco shouted from his workspace as Barry was pacing back in forth in the cortex for who knows how long.

"If you're in my place I'm sure you'd be doing worse." He said as he kept on pacing, checking his phone from time to time.

"Can you just take a seat and calm down?"

"How can I? She's not replying to my messages and when I dial her number it's always out of reach. Who knows what's happening to her right now?"

"Oh, I know alright." His answer actually made Barry stop moving, as he looked at him like he discovered an underground treasure.

"You do?" His eyes widened as he waited for Cisco's response.

"Of course I do, Barry. We both do! You've been talking about it nonstop since she told you she's coming back and that was what? Exactly 13 days and 16 hours ago. And do you know why I'm so precise about that?"

"Why?"

"BECAUSE! You've been acting like a lovesick puppy ever since. I mean, I know how much you two have gone through and don't get me wrong, I'm actually happy for you guys but please stop with the whining already! You're driving me crazy and I definitely not mean that in a good way."

"Alright, I'm sorry. I'm just really worried. She's not answering my calls and-"

"That's because she's on the plane right now! She's probably crying over a chick flick or maybe even asleep, I don't know. But I'm pretty sure she wasn't allowed to check on her phone and please tell me you didn't just attempt to call her despite knowing that."

"Of course not." He said nonchalantly, which Cisco had to narrow his eyes on so he continued, "For the record, I may have sent over a dozen voicemails. I could've done more you know."

"Caitlin's gonna kill you the moment she opens her phone."

"I'm just worried. I haven't been able to communicate with her well this past month compared to the previous ones. What if she changed her mind? What if she realized she doesn't want to be with me anymore? What if she-"

"Has found someone else?" He nodded and as much as Cisco wanted to roll his eyes at that, he didn't. He could really see the despair and worry in his best friend's eyes so he said, "Dude, are you seriously hearing yourself right now? It's Caitlin we're talking about. Remember when you hadn't seen each other for three years and she had a fake marriage and has totally forgotten about you?"

"Of course. How could I not? That's one of the worst days of my life."

"Exactly! You guys have been through worst. What else could happen, right?"

For the first time that morning, Barry settled himself on one of the chairs in the cortex. He let a hand run through his hair as he drew a deep breath.

"You're right man, thanks."

"Of course I am. I'm a genius. And please tell Caitlin that if ever she make you this miserable again, she's gonna have to answer to me."

"Please, you're just as scared of her as I was before."

"No, I'm not! She's just a bit...intimidating. And sometimes threatening... I still have nightmares about her bodyguard that one time I visited her office. Good thing that's all in the past now, phew."

"So about her answering to you-"

"You know what? Forget about it. I'm sure you can handle yourself. Just tell her that her best friend's patiently waiting for her to come back and I miss her very much."

"You're not her best friend, Cisco. When's that gonna sink in?"

"Of course I am. You're just in denial because of that one time she replied to my email and totally ignored yours."

"She fell asleep! It's not like she did it on purpose."

"Whatever. Maybe she's gotten tired of your cheesy messages already."

"Hey! She loved my messages. And I'm pretty sure it wasn't cheesy, it's poetic. There's a huge difference Cisco."

"Fine. Just don't bring a band to the airport later because I know you, Barry. There's an 80% chance you'll do it."

Barry immediately opened his mouth to protest but Cisco gave him a knowing look. He let out a sigh and said,

"I can't wait for you to have a love life so you can stop meddling with mine."

"Woah, great idea dude. So if I ask you to take the afternoon off, you'll let me?" Cisco said as he beamed at Barry.

"Not today, Cisco. I'm going to pick up Cait at the airport remember? Which reminds me, I have to go now." He said as he glanced at his watch and stood up.

"She's scheduled to arrive at 7pm Barry and it's not even lunch yet!" He shouted as Barry made his way out of the cortex.

"Don't wanna be late!" He shouted back and Cisco had to shake his head at that. If love makes you that crazy then he doesn't think he needed that right now.

Classic Barry.

* * *

Barry arrived at the airport a couple of hours before Caitlin's scheduled time of arrival. It's been almost four months (3 months and 27 days to be exact) since she left and although they had been talking with each other almost everyday, he couldn't help but miss her still.

This feeling of longing is something different from what he had felt before. It changes everything now that they can actually be together. He knew she hasn't told him she loves him yet but he was in no rush, taking one step at a time.

He tried to focus his attention to the book he brought with him but he couldn't help but check the exit doors every time there's an announcement of arrival or if he spots a brunette coming out of the doors.

Soon enough, her plane arrived and Barry stood excitedly at the waiting area with a bouquet of flowers in hand and the widest smile on his face. His eyes kept on searching, his hands getting sweaty by the moment.

And then he sees her.

His whole world literally stopped as he stood there with wide eyes. Something is defiantly wrong, like one of his nightmares is coming to life. A lot of thoughts flooding his mind as he tried to make sense of what was unfolding right before his eyes. Because there she is, his Caitlin, smiling comfortably in the arms of-

Hunter Zolomon?

That bastard.

* * *

 **END OF PART EIGHTEEN**

* * *

 **AN: Oh my...I don't want to spoil you guys but it will get better in the next one so please don't hate me. :) As much as I don't want writing these parts, it's necessary for the storyline so please be a little more patient with this fic. Thank you!**

 **-A**


	19. Chapter 19

"Oh my gosh, Barry!"

Everything happened so fast for Caitlin. Not less than half an hour ago, she was just stepping out of the plane into Central City airport, the familiar bustling sound made her realize that she was really back home after almost four dreading months.

She couldn't help but smile as the outcome of her trip to Emerald City was a success, finally granting her to take a breather from all the stress. She knew she couldn't have done it without the help of one Mr. Zolomon, so when he opened his arms for a congratulatory as well as a goodbye hug, she didn't hesitate to return the favor, a smile still firmly etched on her face.

Of course, that's not the main reason of the happiness she experiences at the moment. Her eyes frantically searched for him, specifically looking for a pair of emerald eyes she's been missing since the moment she left. It didn't take long as she caught a glimpse of him, abruptly making his way through the crowd to where she stood.

But she noticed that something's different, something's defiantly wrong as an unreadable expression rested on his face, one that she wasn't used to seeing in him. She expected his goofy smile, the way the sides of his eyes would crinkle as he does so. But none of them were visible and she saw a glimpse of what was going through his head the moment his fist connected with her business partner's jaw.

"What the hell are you doing, Barry?!"

"Me? I can't believe you, Caitlin! After all we've been through...how can you do this to me?"

"What? Barry, you don't understand-"

"Save it. I don't care anymore."

Caitlin just stood there dumbstruck, what just happened? Of all the possible outcomes she thought of (actually dreamed of), this is certainly not one of them.

This is how it was supposed to play out, in her mind that is: She'll spot him a couple of meters from where she stood, his eyes lighting up at the sight of her. She'd rush to his arms, not minding the stares they'll get from the strangers around them.

She'll tell him she has missed him and how she actually missed his teasing above all. She'll let him know how much she appreciated his patience and finally, she'd reward him that one thing he asked for before she left.

This was all in her head and she's pretty sure it will just stay in there as she sees the retreating form of Barry, slowly disappearing in the midst of the crowd.

"Caitlin, are you okay?"

"I'm fine. I'm really sorry about what happened. He's just-"

"I understand. If I was in his place, I would've done much worse. But he's got one hell of a right hook, I'll give him that." He said as he wiped the blood from his busted lip.

"Oh no. I'm terribly sorry. I'd like to stay and help you clean that up but I really have to go now."

"It's alright. I think you have a lot of explaining to do, CEO Snow."

"This is probably harder than any presentation I had to deal with back in that business conference." She said, brows furrowing at the thought.

"You bet. But who's going to pick your things up?"

"I'll just send someone to get them. Now, if you'll excuse me I have something very important to attend to."

* * *

Barry went home straight after that little scene he made at the airport. His right hand still stings but it was nothing compared to what he feels inside his heart.

A lot of questions clouding his mind, emotions were set in a battlefield as he drove recklessly into his penthouse. He slammed the door as he walked in, went to the mini bar and took a bottle of whiskey. The bitterness should've made him feel better but it's doing much worse.

He stopped drinking and made his way to the balcony to breathe in some fresh air. His hands tightly gripping the railing as the sight of Caitlin in someone else's arms replayed in his mind.

He didn't understand why a hug can make him so furious. Maybe it wasn't because of the hug, maybe it was because of _who_ has doing the hugging. He didn't like that Hunter ever since he saw the way he looked at his Cait. And he would absolutely not lose her to someone like him. But the big question was, why would Caitlin choose that bastard over him?

Barry couldn't make sense of it, not even a fiber of his being could understand why. Maybe because there's nothing to understand, for what he thought was there wasn't really what it seems to be. He feels like he's been overlooking something, refusing to acknowledge that one important detail.

Ah, the benefit of the doubt.

His emotions have gone haywire since his eyes fell on that dreadful sight he didn't even think that maybe it's not what-

His thoughts were interrupted by a loud knocking on his door. It's already past ten in the evening and he's sure he doesn't have any guests coming over so he wondered who could it be.

As he neared the door, he thought that maybe Cisco, being the hardheaded best friend he was, decided to come over despite him telling him not to.

He received a call from him right after he went out of the airport, asking if he saw Caitlin already. He wasn't in the mood to talk so he politely asked him to leave him alone for a while and he'll just fill him in with the details when he feels better.

Barry actually thought that for once, Cisco would really listen to him and respect his privacy but now that he's here, well, he certainly does have some other things in mind.

"Cisco, I told you not now-Cait? What are you-"

He was cut off by a furious Caitlin, literally shoving him out of her way as she let herself inside his penthouse. Barry, being dumbfounded, was an understatement because the moment she turned around to face him, he was hit on his arm hard. Wait, he was supposedly the angry one, wasn't he?

"Ow! What was that for?"

"That's for thinking that I'm capable of doing that to you, Barry!"

"What? I don't understand-ow!" She hit him again, harder this time.

"That's for walking out on me without even hearing my explanation!"

"Cait stop hitting-ow!" Her balled fist went to straight to his chest, making him wince a bit.

"That's for ignoring my calls. Don't you know how worried you're making me whenever your this...emotional?!"

"Emotional? So do you think this is just me being emotional?!"

They've reached his living room by this time, both of them keeping a safe distance from each other.

"Oh, wait I'm sorry. You're not just emotional, you overreacted too because of what? Jealousy?"

"Caitlin, you better watch your words. And for the record I wasn't the one who broke my own promise just because I found someone else in my little business trip to Emerald City!"

"Gosh, Barry! Do you hear yourself? For your information, I wasn't the one who easily jumped into conclusions because I let my emotions cloud my judgment. Just admit that you're jealous so we can get this over with."

"I'm not jealous! I don't get jealous! I've never been this jealous! Just...NOW! Dammit, Caitlin!"

He threw his hands up in the air as he flopped down on one of the couches. His face was now buried in both of his hands, elbows resting on his knees as he let himself feel all the bottled up emotions he's been carrying since he went to the airport.

Barry felt the other end of the couch dip as Caitlin took a seat near him. He managed to control his emotions by taking deep breaths before continuing,

"This isn't just about jealousy, Cait. Yes, I admit that I was jealous but it's more than that."

He finally looked up to meet her eyes, both filled with emotions and longing for the other. He carefully reached out to her, gesturing for her to come closer. When she did, he grabbed one of her hands, squeezing it gently.

"When you...almost died on me three years ago, I was terrified. I'm so scared of losing you because you're everything to me. I don't really get it, you know? How can someone like you, an 11-year old girl who I met once, can turn into someone so important, someone who I can't bear to live without." He takes a deep breath as be run a hand through his already messy hair.

"When I left you, that was the hardest decision I made in my life but I know it was necessary. I told myself it's going to be worth it because when I come back, I know you'll be waiting for me. But that's not how it went, right?" He closed his eyes for a brief moment as he reminisced that terrible day when he found out she has lost her memories.

"Cisco would often tell me that I'm out of my mind, that I'm crazy but you know what? Maybe I am. You're someone worth being crazy for, Caitlin Snow."

"Barry..."

"My love for you has been through a lot, Cait. And I'm not gonna lie, it's not easy. Hell, there had been more difficult days than happy ones and sometimes, all I want to do is stop... I just can't." He felt her thumb wiping away his tears, although her eyes were not in a better condition too.

"I know I acted stupid earlier but I just can't stand the idea of losing you again. I always try to stay strong but I have my limits too. And there's this fact that I couldn't just tell you not to be with someone else because you're not mine to begin with." He tried giving her a small smile at the bitter truth and he can see how much she wanted to protest. But he gently squeezed her hand one more time, telling her he wasn't quite done yet.

"There are thousands of reasons why I should stop loving you but there's one reason why I can't. I...I love you, Cait. I know things may never be the same but there's always this fact that no matter what I do, I'll always fall for you, harder than the last time I did."

For someone as brilliant as Caitlin, she found herself unable to speak for the longest time. She just sat there, content with staring at his sincerity filled eyes. He just poured his heart out to her and even though she already knew how he feels, it's still different to actually hear it stumble upon his lips.

She scooted as close to him as possible, embracing him in a tight hug. She knew there's nothing she can say that could come close to his speech but she tries nonetheless. Being the more logical person that she is, she started with the one that needed to be attended first.

She apologizes.

"I'm so sorry, Barry. I shouldn't have yelled at you. I shouldn't have said those words."

"Hey, it's okay. I understand and I'm sorry too. That was really rude of me." He replied almost instantly, returning her embrace with equal intensity.

As they let the comfortable silence set in, Barry pulled away from her to remove her heels as he did to his own shoes too. He leaned back comfortably on the couch, stretching his legs as Caitlin snuggled up to his side, her head resting on his chest.

"I always knew you were trouble, Barry." She said as her fingers drew patterns on his chest.

"I thought I had a perfect life, the one they made me believe. Deep down I knew there's something missing but I kept ignoring it for they wanted me to move on from the past, the accident." At her words, Barry remained silent for he knew it was her turn to talk.

"I thought I was fine until...you came along and literally turned my life upside down. You made me feel things that I shouldn't, even before I was supposedly married to Ronnie." She closed her eyes as she finally let herself admit those things out loud.

"Although you insisted on saying that we've never met before, I refused to believe because my body says otherwise... my heart, it says otherwise."

"Oh, Cait..."

"So when I reached the lowest point of my life, when everything I believed in were nothing but lies, I was ruined. And I pushed you away because I know that you...you're the only one who could destroy me beyond repair and I can't afford that, Barry. I'm really sorry."

"Shh, don't say that. It's not your fault, Cait."

"I just can't help but hate myself for being selfish, Barry. You've always been giving, always selfless and I know you deserve better but you always chose to stay. And I hate myself all the more because of it."

"Caitlin-"

"It's okay. Every single day I spend with you, I'm being reminded of why I fell for you in the first place. I mean, who wouldn't? To me, you're every girl's dream and who was I to even deserve someone like you?" She propped herself up a little to properly look him in the eyes.

"I hate myself for not loving you sooner. I hate myself for not letting you know how much you mean to me. I hate myself for always hurting you when all I want to do is take care of you and be there for you as much as you are to me."

Tears were like waterfall coming down her cheeks and she would've laughed at how miserable she may look right now but she has long accepted that it wasn't about her. It wasn't always about her and right now she just wants to pour her heart out to him.

"You made me come undone, only to build me back up stronger than I was ever before. I was right when I said that you were trouble. But you're the only trouble I'd be willing to lose myself into."

Barry was at loss for words. Their journey wasn't always smooth and he was right when he said that there are more difficult days than happy ones but he wouldn't have it any other way. Because love, indeed, is sweeter the second time around.

"I hate myself for forgetting you, Barry. But if there's one good thing that came out of forgetting you, it's the chance that I get to fall in love with you all over again."

"You...love me?"

"You don't believe me?"

"I-"

She silenced him with a long overdue kiss.

It started sweet and slow, reminding Barry of their teenage years. But he knew it wouldn't stay that way for this kiss was something he craved for. He tightened his hold on her waist as he bit her lower lip to deepen the kiss.

A small moan came out of her mouth without permission and she's perfectly aware how Barry responded to it as his kisses turned more demanding and hungry. Before his hands reach further down her hips, a throbbing pain made its way to her head, making her pull away from Barry almost instantly.

She help herself up as she was now sitting on the couch, one hand pressing on the side of her head.

"Babe, what's wrong? Are you okay?" He's immediately moved beside her, his arm going around her shoulders for support.

"Yeah. I think I just...remembered something."

"What is it?"

"Our first kiss."

He didn't say anything, he just grinned from ear to ear and enveloped her in a hug once more.

It's getting late and as much as Caitlin wanted this night to never end, her body is begging her to rest. She has endured the fatigue and the jet lag from her flight for too long and now it's making her pay. But before Caitlin could speak, she heard Barry whisper in her ear,

"Stay the night."

"Barry-"

"Relax, you can stay in my room first while I fix the guest bedroom."

She nodded then Barry extended his hand which she gladly took, leading her inside his room.

"Make yourself comfortable. I'll just go fix the other room."

"Thanks."

Caitlin's eyes wandered around the room. It looks pretty much like Barry's personality with light colors and some amusing decorations at the walls, such a total nerd. A photo on his bedside table caught her attention. It was a picture of them which she assumed was taken when they got "married" at the marriage both.

They looked so happy back then and although part of her has already accepted the fact that her memories may never come back, she can't help but long for them still. Besides, nothing is impossible right?

A few moments later, Barry came back to his bedroom. And the sight before him is enough to make him abandon his decision of them sleeping in separate rooms because there she was, standing near the window, bathe in the moonlight with nothing but undergarments and his white button down shirt.

She must've noticed him staring because not a few minutes later she said,

"I hope you don't mind. I rummaged through your wardrobe cause I don't think I can sleep well in my dress. And I really believe I need a good night's sleep tonight."

"I don't..I mean, it's okay. You look hot-I mean I hope it's not too hot in here but you can always adjust the aircon if you want."

"Okay, thanks."

Barry just stood there unmoving, his eyes going back to admiring her from head to toe. He knew it was inappropriate but seeing her in his clothes did things to him. He missed seeing her that way, leaving him craving for more.

"Barry?"

"Yeah?"

"Will you stay with me until I fall asleep?"

"Sure...yeah. Just let me change. I'll be back."

When he returned, clad only in sweatpants, he noticed that she's already settled herself underneath the covers, her back facing him. He slowly climbed up the bed, snaking an arm around her waist as he inhaled the familiar scent of her hair.

She turned around to face him, placing a delicate kiss on his bare chest then on his neck before saying,

"Good night, Barry."

"Good night, Cait."

He kissed her forehead as she snuggled closer to him, screw sleeping in separate rooms. When he thought she has fallen asleep, she stirred a bit and said,

"Barry?"

"Hmm?"

"I forgot to tell you something."

"What is it?"

"I... I love you too. Just in case that wasn't clear to you."

"Well, the kiss kinda convinced me a bit but I think I need more just to be sure."

She rolled her eyes as that but gave him a short but sweet kiss nonetheless. It ended way too fast for Barry's liking but before he could protest, Caitlin interrupted him by saying,

"Before you say anything, I'm really tired. But we can always... continue tomorrow."

"I'll hold you to that, Dr. Snow."

"Go to sleep, Mr. Allen."

* * *

The next morning, Barry woke up energized than ever. He quickly scanned his side to admire the woman who caused the overflowing happiness he's feeling only to be disappointed that she wasn't there.

It wasn't all just a dream, was it?

He checked his bruised hand and he knew he shouldn't be relieved that it still hurts but the fact that it did, made him calm down because it only means that everything that happened yesterday was all true.

He dashed out of his room, not minding to put on a shirt as he frantically searched for her.

He heard noises coming from the kitchen and soon enough, he saw her standing there. Her hair in a messy bun, her frame clad only in a single piece of white shirt but to him, it's the most beautiful sight he's ever seen.

"You can do more than just staring you know." She said without even turning away from her cooking. Barry couldn't help but think that maybe she has a sixth sense or something.

"Well, in that case..." He hugged her from behind, peppering kisses along her neck then said, "Good morning to you too, Dr. Snow."

"I was actually hoping you'd help me cook not just stand there and stare but clearly you have other things in your mind, Mr. Allen."

"But you didn't have to do this. You're my guest. I should be the one to-"

"I'm your girlfriend and I decided to live up to my duties starting today."

"Did you just say...girlfriend?"

"Yeah. If you don't want then-"

"No, no, no, of course I do. I just-I mean, shouldn't you ask me out first, Dr. Snow?"

"I thought we were way past that, Mr. Allen."

"Yeah. I guess we are."

Barry inched closer to her, trapping her between the kitchen counter and his body. He made sure to check if the stove was off just to not have a repeat of having burned pancakes.

He kissed her passionately on the lips, making up for the lost time. He feels her lithe fingers tracing the indents of his abs, sending shivers throughout his body. He started trailing kisses down to her neck, unclasping the first button of her shirt. She wrapped her legs around her waist and her hands would've traveled further down if it wasn't for the sound of his stomach growling.

She broke the kiss as giggles erupted from her mouth, making him whine in disappointment. She carefully pushed him away and said,

"Let's eat."

"But-"

"Nope. I want to take care of you and that includes your health so I suggest we eat."

He started grumbling incomprehensible things but settled on the breakfast table nonetheless. He reached for the pancake when Caitlin noticed his bruised hand.

"You didn't put ice on that, did you babe?"

The way she called him "babe" like she used to before, still had the same effect on him. It feels like he's a teenager all over again with the familiar butterflies and the warm sensation at the pit of his stomach.

"It may have slipped my mind because someone's been very distracting."

"Oh, shush. Where's your first aid kit?"

"It's there on the end of the cupboards. I'm gonna go get it."

"Don't move. I'll do it."

Barry just stared at her in awe. He has forgotten how caring Caitlin could be, although a bit bossy, but he's just happy that somehow things are going back to what it used to be.

She came back with an ice pack in hand, her doctor instincts taking over. He wondered if she missed being one, for he knew that's what she loved doing ever since.

"Give me your hand."

He obliged but not before saying, "You know there's a difference between a boss and a girlfriend."

"Are you seriously complaining right now?"

"Of course not. I'm just messing with you, boss." He said, giving her a cheeky smile.

"For your information, the girlfriend wouldn't have to be bossy if her boyfriend at least tried not to be reckless."

"What can I say? That guy really gets on my nerves."

"I know. But you still have some apologizing to do, do you realize that?"

"Yeah. Man, I'm such an idiot."

"Definitely."

He raised his brow at that and before he could put a word of protest, she said,

"But you're my adorable idiot."

* * *

 **END OF PART NINETEEN**

* * *

 **AN: A big thanks to caitlinmontgomery for giving me the idea to have Hunter Zolomon be suckerpunched on the face. Hope you guys enjoyed this one!**

 **-A**


	20. Chapter 20

Caitlin woke up feeling alive as ever. A smile made its way on her features instead of the usual heavy sigh that came from yet another sleepless night. To say that she had been getting enough sleep these days is an understatement for her restless nights had been transformed into a journey to the dreamland ever since she spent the the night at Barry's.

It's been eight months since her life turned upside down with her father passing away and the truth being revealed to her in the ugliest of ways. She never really believed that she could move past that without having to lose her mind at some point. The thought of feeling anything but pain from hatred and betrayal is almost an impossible task but now that she's actually smiling, and a real one at that, she couldn't help but be happy for how her life turned out to be.

Of course, all of these things wouldn't be possible if it wasn't for _him_ , the man who literally broke in to her life and insisted on staying despite her efforts in keeping him at a safe distance.

After all the betrayal she's been through, she made sure not to open the door to anyone ever again. But he held the key, knew the combinations to the vault inside her heart and before she knew it, she's welcoming him with open arms, keeping a spare room clean and tidy just in case he decided to stay the night.

Caitlin walked into the balcony, admiring the view that she never had the time to appreciate until lately. It wasn't the direction of the sun that changed or the way the leaves would move along the wind, it's her perspective that transformed, making her see things in a different light. A positive one.

The sound from her phone brought her out of her daydream. Her smile widened when she saw who the message is from. Funny how he would always make his presence known (in any way), whenever she thinks about him.

 _It's not a coincidence if you're always thinking about him._ A thought made its way into her mind and she wouldn't argue on how accurate it is. She eagerly read the message, her mind memorizing it without even asking for permission.

 **From: Barry Allen**

 **Time: 5:42 AM**

 _ **Good morning, beautiful. Hope you had a good night's sleep without me by your side. Miss you already. xx**_

 _ **Love, Your Barry**_

She fought the urge to roll her eyes at his way of ending his messages. Doesn't he know that his name has been registered in her phone? Instead of replying, she gives him a call. After the second ring, he picked up, not even trying to hide the fact that he's having a staring game with his phone, just waiting for her reply.

 _ **"Hello?"**_

"You do realize that your number has been registered in my phone under the name Barry Allen, right?"

 _ **"Babe, you're supposed to say hi first."**_

"I mean, you're making it look like a letter instead of a text message."

 _ **"..."**_

"Hello? Barry you're still there?"

 _ **"..."**_

"I can hear you breathing you know."

 _ **"..."**_

"If you won't talk to me, I'm hanging up."

 _ **"..."**_

"Barry, seriously."

 _ **"..."**_

"Ugh...Hi, babe. So I was saying-"

 _ **"That's more like it."**_

"-that you shouldn't have to put a closing signature in your texts. You're making it look like a letter."

 _ **"What's wrong with that? You used to love my signatures in my letters."**_

"Exactly. Closing signatures are for letters not for text messages. What's the point of number registration if you'll put your name in every single one of your texts?"

 _ **"Ah, I see you're still as OC as ever Dr. Snow."**_

"And what do you mean by that?"

 _ **"Nothing. Wait, you put my number under what name again?"**_

"Barry Allen."

 _ **"Barry Allen? Now I see where the problem is."**_

"What problem-"

 _ **"Don't worry, I'll fix that when I see you later."**_

"But we don't have plans-"

 _ **"Love you, bye!"**_

Her complaints were interrupted by the sound of the other line ending. Barry Allen is the only man that she wanted to strangle and hug at the same time (if that's even remotely possible). He drives her over the edge but the weird thing is, instead of being bothered by it, she finds herself becoming fond of him all the more because of it.

She took a quick glance on her alarm clock on her bedside table. Noticing that it's almost six in the morning, she headed for the shower to start her day. An hour passed and she was ready to go, having just finished her healthy breakfast.

After checking the contents of her purse, Caitlin made her way to her front door but instead of finding her car, she was surprised by the sight of Barry, leaning on his silver Audi waiting for her.

"Barry? What are you doing here?"

"Barry Allen ma'am, reporting for boyfriend duties." He said, doing his best to imitate a soldier's salute.

"Silly. Come here." She flashed him a smile and went on her tiptoes to grab him by the collar and kissed him. He quickly returned the kiss, drawing her close as he leaned further on his car.

"Someone's in a good mood today, huh?" He said after they broke the kiss. His hands still resting on her hips.

"Well, it's not everyday that my boyfriend decides on living up to his duties this early."

"That's because we have an urgent matter to discuss."

"If you mean chewing you out for hanging up on me earlier, I decided to put that in my afternoon schedule. So I can let out all my frustrations in one go. Time efficient, isn't it?"

"Ha ha. Very funny, Dr. Snow. But that's not what I meant."

"Okay. Then what is it?"

"Give me your phone."

"What? Why?"

"Just hand it over."

"Not until you tell me what you're going to do with it."

"Babe, a relationship is built on trust and love. So just trust me on this one and just give me your phone."

"Fine. Just be quick because I'm on my way to work and I can't be late. I'm never late." She glared at him.

"Cait, you own that company. You can never be late." He shrugged and continued tapping on her phone.

"For your information, I have my standards Mr. Allen."

He pretended not to listen as he kept on doing his thing on her phone. Caitlin tried to sneak a peek but every time she gets close, he would purposefully move the screen out of her sight.

A few minutes later, he handed her back the phone, a sly smile stretching on his face. Caitlin narrowed her eyes at him in suspicion before saying,

"What did you do to my phone, Barry?"

"Nothing. But from now on, I can assure you that I'll never put a closing signature on my messages ever again."

"Hmm...okay. But this isn't the end of it. I'm keeping a keen eye on you, Allen." She pointed an accusing finger at him, making him raise both of his hands up in defense.

"It's not life threatening I promise."

"You better make sure of it. Now, if you'll excuse me I have to get to work."

Caitlin kissed his cheek and waved for the driver to bring her car over but before she could move, Barry grabbed her arm and said,

"I'll take you."

"Barry, it's okay. I can manage. Besides, aren't you going to work too?"

"I am but I'm on boyfriend duty so I guess that includes driving you to work."

"Thanks but you really don't have to. I still need my car to drive home later."

"Then I'll just pick you up. Because that's what a good boyfriend would do."

"Baby, you know we're not keeping scores right?" She smiled at him as she took one of his hands, playing with his long fingers as she does so.

"I know. I...just want to spend more time with you."

Barry looked away at his own confession, his free hand traveling to the back of neck, nervously rubbing it. His eyes flew up to meet hers when he heard her laughing. Did he say something funny?

"Hey, what's so funny?"

"Nothing. But you could've just said so instead of using the good boyfriend as an excuse for being so clingy."

"I am not. You're a bit too assuming Dr. Snow."

"Am I, Mr. Allen?

Before Barry could tease her back, she already rounded his car and settled herself in the passenger seat. She blew the horns once and gestured for him to take the driver seat then shouted,

"Baby, come on! I can't stand a minute without you by my side." Her voice is laced with a venomous amount of sweetness, pouting her lips with a little bit of exaggeration.

Barry narrowed his eyes at her as he made his way to the driver's seat. He purposefully ignored her teasing smile as started the car. "Enjoy your teasing while you still can, Dr. Snow. It won't be long until I find the right timing for my revenge."

"We'll see about that, Mr. Allen."

* * *

The drive to Caitlin's work was peaceful, the only thing disrupting the silence inside the car is his girlfriend's out of tune humming which he found so adorable that he couldn't stop a small laugh from coming out of mouth.

"Are you laughing at me right now?" She asked, lifting her head from his shoulder where it had been resting since they left her house.

Due to how close her mouth to his ear is, a chill run down his spine with very word she spoke. "Babe no, of course not. I just-well you..."

"This better be a good reason, Allen."

"Well, you sound just like you did before. I guess that's one thing that even amnesia can't get out of you."

"And that thing being...?" She asked expectantly.

"You love singing..."

"Go on. I promise I won't be mad."

"Promise?"

"Yeah."

Barry waited until they reached the stoplight before answering, "You love singing but singing...doesn't love you back. You've always been adorably out of tune."

"Hey! That's rude." She smacked his arm and pinched his sides.

"Cait, you said you won't get mad."

"I'm not mad! But you could've at least sugarcoated it."

"I said it was adorable-ow!" Barry rubbed his arm this time. She doesn't look like it but she sure is strong.

"I bet you are better than me in this singing thing if you had the guts to say that."

"You have no I idea. You should've remembered the way you melt when I sing to you."

"Please, as if I would believe that."

"Oh my dear Dr. Snow. Trust me, you don't just melt you also-" He caught himself before he could actually say things that would put them in an awkward situation, "-never mind the second one."

"But why? Was it something embarrassing?" She said, brows furrowing in curiosity.

His reply came faster as he would've liked, "No! It's not Cait, believe me."

"Barry if it's something embarrassing then I need to know. I'd be glad not to make a fool of myself again."

"Babe, it's not like that. It's something I can't tell you right now."

There's a glint in his eyes that she couldn't decipher, his cheeks burning red as if he's reminiscing something... What was is that could make Barry Allen so flustered?

"Alright, fine. I'll let you off the hook only if you promise to sing for me when you feel like it."

"That's a promise I would certainly uphold."

* * *

A few minutes later, they arrived at their destination. Barry parked the car in front of the skyscraper's massive glass doors and went to Caitlin's side of the car to open the door for her. He leaned in to give her a goodbye kiss but Caitlin went to peck his cheeks instead. He felt that something was off so before she could completely get inside the building, he carefully grabbed her arm.

"What was that?" He asked, confusion clouding his eyes.

"What?" She replied nonchalantly, hoping he wouldn't ask any further.

"You know what I'm talking about."

"I just reapplied my lipstick." She shrugged.

"Caitlin Snow, are you ashamed of a little PDA?" He asked, a teasing smile plastered on his face.

"I don't know what you meant by that but I really have to go now." She said and started turning around.

"Not so fast, babe." He grabbed her arm yet again but instead of stopping her, he led her to the entrance of the building.

"Barry, what are you doing?!" She half screamed, half whispered to him as her eyes went to their now entwined hands.

"Boyfriend duties." He shrugged.

"Wait, Barry stop. You can't go inside. You still have to go to work right?" Her eyes were pleading his but instead of giving in, he decided to tease her a bit more.

"Nah, that can't wait. Now, come on. I don't want my girl to be late for work. She has her standards to meet and I'd be very much disappointed with myself if I prevent her from doing so."

"Barry." She warned.

"Cait, I'm just walking you to the elevator. What's so wrong with that?"

"Nothing! It's just-"

"You said it yourself. Nothing's wrong so come on let's go. Or do you want me to carry you inside?"

"Oh God no. I can manage, I promise. It's not like I'll get lost in the premises of my own corporation, Barry."

"I know. I just want to escort you inside. Why are you so against with that idea? Are you ashamed of me?" He tried his best to look hurt, pouting his lips to be more convincing.

"No, of course not!" She took a deep breath then continued, "Barry, look. This whole relationship thing with you is still new for me. Don't get me wrong but this is my workplace and I wanted to keep things professional whenever I'm here." She squeezed his hand and looked straight into his eyes. They're still halfway to the building's entrance and Caitlin has led them behind a nearby pillar so they can talk privately.

"I understand." He said, eyes downcast. "I'm sorry if I'm being so demanding about this. I guess I just can't help but want to let everyone know how much you mean to me. I don't know about you but you make me feel like the luckiest man alive, Cait."

Caitlin smiled at his words. She knew her Barry has a tendency to be a grade A pain in the ass most of the time she forgets how he can be sincere just as much.

She wasn't always the touchy-feely kind of girl like she used to be but being with Barry somehow makes her want to do things she never dreamed of doing before. She didn't know why or if it's even possible but the more she takes up to his challenges, the more she remembers what it feels like to be her old self.

"Sometimes I forget how much of a sappy romantic you are, Mr. Allen. So I suggest that you escort me now for I only have ten minutes left before I break my on time streak."

"Cait, are you sure? I don't want you to feel like I'm forcing you to do things that you're not comfortable with."

"Trust me, you're not. I'm doing this in my own free will if that's what you wanna hear."

"Great. So shall we, milady?" He smiled cheekily at her before extending his arm which she gladly took.

They made their way to the enormous glass doors manned by security guards who look more like bouncers with their impressive built. Caitlin was well greeted by them but Barry, on the other hand, has been receiving death glares the moment he stepped foot on the premises.

"Whenever Mr. Bartholomew Allen comes in here, with or without my companionship, I'd like you to treat him with the same respect you have for me. Is that understood?" Caitlin asked the most intimidating-looking man from among the security staff.

"Yes, Dr. Snow." The chief of security replied.

"Thank you. I appreciate the gesture chief." She nodded at him then smiled as she led Barry inside the building.

Noticing that Barry hasn't spoken a word since they entered the premises, she removed her hand from his arm to give his hand a gentle squeeze, "Everything okay, Barry?"

"Yeah. Everything's more than okay, especially now that I can visit you anytime I want without having to deal with your scary security guards. But do you really have to use my full name?"

"I told you, I value professionalism inside this building. Speaking of which, I guess I should've thought about this through before I made that decision. I can't have you barging into my important meetings now, can I?"

"Please. I'm sure you'd be more than happy to spend time with me rather than your boring meetings."

"Always so bold and confident, Mr. Allen but I'm afraid I have to agree with you on that."

"What can I say? My charms are rather irresistible, ain't it Dr. Snow?"

Caitlin just smiled at him and gave his cheeks a gentle pinch. She turned around to face him as they arrived at the front of her elevator.

"Thanks for escorting me today, babe." She leaned in to kiss his cheek once again.

He frowned at her and held her hand, "That's it? No..." He gestured to his lips, wetting it as he looked at her with sexy eyes.

Her only reply was, "Professionalism." And went inside the open elevator.

However, Barry didn't back down. He looked at her with such intensity as he put on his best puppy dog face. Then his gaze went up and down her body, taking her in and licking his lips as if he's-

Just as the doors of the elevator are about to close, Caitlin rolled her eyes, pushed the button a bit harshly as she briskly exited the elevator. She took Barry by his tie and kissed his lips rather passionately.

She ignored the gasps and whispers from everyone who's witnessing the scene and she knows, for heaven's sake, she knows that it wasn't long until her employees will make this a hot topic to gossip around her workplace.

Who knew that the Ice Queen is capable of showing real emotions rather than being so uptight, calm and collected all the time?

Caitlin had been making titles in her head if ever her love life was to be published in some kind of newspaper. That thought was absurd but it doesn't mean the possibility wasn't there. But who cares?

She couldn't put up a fight with her logical self even if she wanted to. Because there was no need for an argument in the first place. Her heart had been taking over ever since she agreed to be with Barry and as much as she doesn't, shouldn't want that to happen, what else can she do when she can't help but feeling that what she's doing is right?

It feels so damn right, so good that she wouldn't dare to live a single day without that feeling. That feeling of being in love and to be loved back is something that had been nipping at her heels, gripping her insides and she knew it was crazy but she can't help but crave for more.

Heavens have mercy on her soul for she knew that she's done for. All because of a man standing right in front of her.

"You're going to be the death of me, Barry." She said so very much out of breath that made Barry want to push her inside the elevator, shut the doors forever and have his way with her.

He wouldn't mind doing just that if only he hadn't had the utmost respect for her. She's always been so precious for him and he'd gladly make the world know how much.

"You don't have any idea what I want to do to you right now, _Caitlin_." He's surprised with how the words came out of his mouth. He preferred it stayed in his mind where it belonged but when it comes down to her, he forgets how primal he could be.

Caitlin knew that in their time together, no matter how short it may be, he never really called her with her full name. It's always been his terms of endearment, "Cait", "Baby", "Babe" or sometimes he'd refer to her as "His Girl" but never "Caitlin".

"Caitlin" only stumbled upon his lips in situations that she could count in one hand. One, if he's upset or angry. And for the record, it only happened once when he thought she's being frisky with Hunter Zolomon. Two, if he wants to let her know that he's serious about something. And three, well, she's only been discovering it right now so it's still under deliberation but by the looks of it, not to mention in her doctor's point of view, "Caitlin" comes out of his mouth when he's pretty much, _turned on._

Barry thought that what he said has crossed some lines but when he heard her reply, well...

"Maybe I do."

She said then bit her lower lip as she looked at his still swollen lips, making him know that she really had an idea to what he was implying.

Before Barry could totally lose his mind, Caitlin stepped back. He hadn't realized that there's not an inch between them, making him feel a bit guilty for their PDA especially they're in Caitlin's workplace.

"I should go now." She met his eyes and glared at his sheepish smile. "For real this time."

"Are you sure? How about one more for the road?" He teased.

"How about I kill you right now?" She smiled devilishly at him.

"Oh but you won't do that, Dr. Snow."

"You're lucky I love you, Mr. Allen."

"Damn right, I am."

* * *

END OF PART TWENTY


	21. Chapter 21

Caitlin gripped the elevator handle mechanically, her legs still a bit wobbly due to her little scene with Barry. The silence inside is almost deafening, almost dead quiet if it wasn't for the wild beating of her heart that reverberates through her being.

She must be crazy. She must be totally crazy if what she thought happened, really did happen. Because there's no way that the old _Caitlin Snow_ would pull off something as gutsy as that.

But what if she's not _Caitlin Snow_ anymore? What if, somehow, she found a way to be the Caitlin Snow before the storm?

She smiled at herself with the thought of transforming from an empty shell of hatred and pain into someone who's actually human, someone who's finally ready to move on.

Or maybe she had.

She just didn't realize it yet.

The elevator dinged, bringing her out of her thoughts as she readies herself to face yet another day at work. She wonders if the rumors has already reached the top floor and by the looks of it, it had. She shook her head as a fond smile crept up her face, something that her old self wasn't capable of doing so.

She made her way straight into her spacious office, settling down on her leather chair as she let her secretary give her a rundown of her schedule for today.

"You have a meeting with the board at 10am but other than that, your afternoon schedule is pretty much free, Dr. Snow." Her secretary informed, holding an electronic notebook.

"Thanks, Secretary Jones." She smiled at her, causing the elderly woman to have a surprised look on her face.

Caitlin stared at her a bit more, wondering if she said something wrong, "Is everything alright, Ms. Jones?"

"Yes, Dr. Snow. Everything is fine. It's just..." She hesitated and Caitlin gave her another smile to encourage her to continue.

"Proceed, Ms. Jones. I won't mind."

"Well, it's actually the first time you...you smiled wholeheartedly, ma'am."

Caitlin looked at her intently, realization hitting her hard. She knew she'd been horrible these past few months and that meant treating her employees in a not so friendly way. She massaged her temples in irritation for she knew that her actions were unjustifiable.

"Look, Secretary Jones...I want to apologize for the way I've treated you since the turnover. I know what I've been through wasn't a valid excuse for my behavior so I just want to thank you for always being so patient with me."

"There's nothing to apologize for, Dr. Snow. What you've been through, it's such a tragedy no one should experience but look at you now. I can't say that you're fully recovered but I can see there has been a huge progress."

"Yeah. I think there is."

"I bet someone is responsible?" The elderly woman looked at her knowingly and Caitlin pondered how she ended up opening up to her secretary.

However, Secretary Jones wasn't just a secretary. She had been in the company longer than Caitlin ever had. She was her father's secretary and probably one of the longest employee the company ever had.

It reminded her of Marianne, their longtime household helper who took care of her ever since she was a child. Although she doesn't remember her either, Caitlin felt like she was one of the few people she could actually confide in. Now she's having the same feeling towards her secretary.

"Well, I...I wouldn't deny that there is." Caitlin replied, a fond smile forming on her lips once again.

"I'm happy for you Dr. Snow and I know Sir Christopher would've been proud of how his little girl turned out to be."

Caitlin was taken aback by what she said. She never thought that she wouldn't have been that hurt to hear about her father. That topic has always been sensitive to her but now she's starting to feel something else than numbness towards him.

Ever since the accident, her father has been loving and supportive. She remembered calling him the best and she intended for it to stay that way if it wasn't for how he managed to lie to his own daughter.

Sometimes, she refused to believed that it really happened. But she knew better not to be in denial and so she started to accept, slowly but surely.

"Dr. Snow?" She asked as she noticed how the young professional turned silent.

"Hmm?"

"I know I wasn't supposed to meddle with your personal life for I'm just a secretary but I wanted to let you know that although your father made a lot of lies, one thing stays true. He loved you so much."

Caitlin let her words sink in and without actually thinking about it, she made her way to her secretary and hugged her. She seemed surprised but hugged her back nonetheless. Before she pulled away, she whispered,

"Thank you Ms. Jones. And please don't ever think that you're just a secretary because we both know you're more than that."

The elderly woman almost cried at her words. She knew Caitlin wasn't the cold, unfeeling person whom she was forced to be at one point so now that she's returning to her old warm self, she couldn't help but feel like she's doing a great job in keeping Caitlin's father's last wish; to look after her.

"It's my pleasure, Dr. Snow." She said and turned around to leave but before she could touch the door's handle, Caitlin called out to her.

"Ms. Jones?"

"Yes, ma'am?"

"Could you free my afternoon schedule? There's something I need to do."

"Of course. Just to remind you ma'am, you have a meeting in thirty."

"Oh sure. Thanks."

"And Dr. Snow? You might want to fix your lipstick."

Caitlin blushed a deep shade of red, turning away to find an excuse but it seemed futile. Luckily, her secretary has already left, saving her from embarrassing herself further. She quickly rushed into the comfort room and true enough, her lipstick was a bit smudged. It wasn't that obvious but _still_ , it wasn't as on point as it was supposed to be.

She smiled to herself, thinking that maybe, it's time for her to finally move forward but in order to do that, she needs to accomplish one thing.

Make peace with her past.

* * *

The meeting ended earlier than she expected, leaving her more time to finalize her decisions. She checks herself once, twice, just to make sure she's ready for this. She took a deep breath and she just knew it was the right thing to do, her heart couldn't agree more.

She made her way down to the parking lot, only for her to realize that she didn't bring any car for _someone_ insisted on driving her to work. She settled for her company car instead, asking for the keys from her secretary.

Caitlin drove to an Italian restaurant downtown, it was a bit of a long drive but she wanted to make sure she's doing it right. This whole process wasn't easy but it was necessary for her to be able to move past her previous nightmares. And if the first step includes going to a place where she and-

A text message interrupted her thoughts yet again. She waited for the stoplight before glancing on her phone.

 **From: Your Barry**

 **Time: 11:56 am**

 _ **I forgot to tell you something this morning.**_

She didn't know what it is but something seemed off in this particular text message. She took a closer look and there it is, no closing signature, just like what he said. She smiled and thought of complimenting him by replying but before she could tap anything on her phone, another message came in.

 **From: Your Barry**

 **Time: 11:57 am**

 _ **You looked so hot in a blazer. How do you manage to pull that off? ;)**_

Her smile widened at that and as much as she wanted to reply, she didn't. She knew better not to text while driving, one life-changing accident was enough for her, seriously. She tapped on her earpiece instead and gave him a call.

 _ **"Hey, sexy."**_

She rolled her eyes before replying,

"Hi, Mr. Allen. I'd like to commend you for taking my advice on closing signatures. I must say, you've really impressed me."

 _ **"Ah, good to hear that, Dr. Snow. I bet you liked my new name on your phone too."**_

"Your...new name?"

 _ **"Yeah. Now we're even. Because that's how I saved your number in my phone too."**_

"Wait, hold it. I'm not sure what-"

She paused, took a quick glance on her phone screen and there she saw that she's in a conversation with a caller id in bold letters, **Your Barry**.

"-the hell Barry! So that's what you did to my phone earlier. I knew I shouldn't have trusted you with my phone."

 _ **"I'm glad you like it, Cait."**_

"I don't! Wait until I murder you later."

 _ **"Ah, you've threatened me twice in a day, Dr. Snow. That's flattering."**_

"Barry, this isn't a joke. I told you I needed to keep some things professional and that includes my phone."

 _ **"By professional you mean..."**_

The line went silent for awhile until she heard something that made her cheeks burning.

"Barry! That's not what I meant!"

 _ **"Really? Because the last time you wanted to be professional, we kinda ended up... making out in front of the whole company."**_

"Ugh...I'm never going to live that down, am I?"

 _ **"Nope. I'm sorry if I tainted your reputation, Dr. Snow."**_

"For the record, I'm responsible for that too I'm afraid."

 _ **"Well, it's good to know that you weren't held against your will. By the way, are you free for lunch today?"**_

"I'm actually on my way to a restaurant now."

 _ **"Seriously? Why didn't you ask me? Wait, are you with someone? Don't tell me-"**_

"No, Barry I'm not. You don't need to be jealous, silly. I'm going alone."

 _ **"Now, where's the fun in that? Tell me where you're going and I'll meet you there."**_

"Don't you have work after?"

 _ **"I do but I'll just cancel it."**_

"How about I'll just drop by your office and we'll have lunch together?"

 _ **"Sounds great."**_

"What would you like to have?"

 _ **"You."**_

"Babe, seriously."

 _ **"I'm serious...but whatever, surprise me?"**_

"Okay. I'll see you in thirty."

 _ **"See you. Bye sexy, love you."**_

"Love you too. Bye."

Caitlin hanged up the phone and took a detour to Big Belly Burger, taking a mental note to order for Cisco for she's sure he'd be there too. It's been a while since they last saw each other and she can't wait to visit him again.

"Knock, knock."

A familiar voice took Cisco out of his "thinking zone", making him frown a bit for the disturbance since it was still his lunch break. Whatever irritation he had was erased the moment he laid eyes on Caitlin, his best friend he hasn't seen in a long time.

"Well, well, well. If it wasn't the ever elusive Dr. Caitlin Snow-" He stood up from his chair to give her a hug, "-who also happened to be my multimillionaire of a best friend. You're my best friend, right?"

Caitlin just chuckled at him and returned his hug tighter, "Cisco, I missed you so much." She pulled away a bit and said, "Of course I am. And you're mine, too"

"Ha! I'm totally right. Barry always insisted that I'm not, probably because of that email thing. I bet he was jealous." He said, eyes glinting like it did when he's eating something sweet.

"Where is he anyway? I brought lunch." She raised the takeout bags on her hand and waved it across Cisco's face.

"Woah, BBB. Please tell me you have something for me in there." He grabbed her by her shoulders and looked at her straight in the eyes, making her laugh a bit as she nodded.

"I don't know what you want so I got you a cheeseburger deluxe. Nothing can go wrong with that choice, right?"

"Absolutely. Wait, cheese fries?"

"I got one for Barry..." She trailed off as she saw Cisco's wide smile fading so instead she said, "...but he doesn't know that yet so I guess you can have it."

"Caitlin, you're the best. You know that?"

"Definitely. But I'll only give it to you only if you promise not to tell him."

Cisco made a gesture like zipping his mouth and throwing the imaginary key away, all the while nodding his head furiously.

"It's a done deal then." She said as Cisco took the takeout bags from her, rummaging through like a five-year old.

"By the way, he's in the office talking to Joe's partner. The CCPD needs help in analyzing some data." He said with a mouthful of fries.

"Thanks. I'll just wait for him. Mind if I stay with you? I really miss it here."

"Sure thing. But you remember Joe, right? I mean, of course you don't remember him or anything else but Barry has mentioned him to you, hasn't he?"

"Yeah he did. We actually visited him last week when Henry decided to spend the weekend here in Central City."

"Oohh, getting cozy with the family now, are we? Just send me the wedding invite a month before because I'd totally need time for my best man speech. Wait, I'm going to be the best man, right?"

Caitlin blushed at his mention of wedding, shrugging it off by saying, "Cisco, it's too early for that. Besides, we've only been together for a month come next week."

"Puh-lease. You two have been together like-your whole lives! Yes, you don't remember much of it and there's that thing with your 'husband' but look at you now. You're the only people I know who's very much in love it's almost making me sick. No offense, I love you both but if you two still don't end up together, there's probably something wrong with the world."

"Cisco, I appreciate your concern but Barry and I are just taking things slow. We're happy where we are right now and maybe we'll get there but that's still a long way ahead of us."

"Alright, fine. I'm just...I'm so happy for you guys I wanted it to be forever."

"And here I thought Barry's the only cheesy one." She smiled at him as she nudged his shoulder lightly.

"He still is."

They sat in comfortable silence, catching up from time to time but Caitlin's thoughts were drifting off to the topic of marriage Cisco has just opened earlier. The idea is no stranger to her but she feels like she had some things to secure before actually deciding to settle down, including the issue she had to address by herself this afternoon.

Her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of voices chatting. She easily recognized the one as Barry's but the other was of a female, a bubbly one at that. She thought Joe's partner was a guy so she was a bit surprised to hear a woman's voice.

"I may have mentioned this like a thousand times but I'm totally a fan of your work. And I'm not saying that out of personal basis, I mean I could have but I'm pretty sure others have took notice of it too. Can you imagine _the_ Oliver Queen hired you personally?" Caitlin heard the woman said as she suspected that they were walking into the cortex.

"Well, I-I mean, thanks. There's not a lot of people who knew that part of my life so uhm...that was nice of you to notice." Barry replied.

"How could I not? I mean you're very talented and good-looking-I mean, you seem like a good person not that I just called you handsome or what. But you are...a good person I mean."

Caitlin didn't know if it was jealousy talking or this girl is making her moves on Barry. She wasn't an expert with this whole flirting thing but by the sound of it, that woman is totally flirting with her Barry. She just hoped that Barry wouldn't flirt back because if he did-

"Uh, thanks. You seem like a nice person too, Patty."

"Thanks. I was wondering if ever you have free time and I'm just saying if ever because you know, you own S.T.A.R. Labs and all and that's totally cool but it also means you're a very busy man-okay, what I'm saying is can you teach me how to write a forensic report some time?"

"Well, Patty I-"

"Just over lunch or coffee maybe? I promise it won't be long. I'm a fast learner I promise."

Okay, she didn't just flirted with him, she's totally asking her boyfriend out. This has to stop and it has to stop now.

"Actually, Patty-"

"Hey, babe." Caitlin called out to him just as he and Patty made it to the cortex. She wrapped a hand around his neck and gave him a searing kiss, much to his and other people's shock.

He kissed her back just as she was about to pull back, making Cisco choke on his burger. Patty's reaction was a mixture of shock and confusion but mostly embarrassment. Of course, he has a girlfriend. How could she overlook that important detail?

"Who is she?" Caitlin asked, her hand firmly placed around Barry's arm.

He cleared his throat before saying, "This is uh, Patty Spivot, Joe's partner from CCPD."

"Hi, Dr. Caitlin Snow. It's nice to meet you, Patty." She said and extended her hand for the other woman to shake.

"It's nice to meet you too." Patty took her hand and shook it. She couldn't help but think that they could be really good friends if they had met in a different setting, one where she didn't try to ask her boyfriend out. Now, she wasn't sure anymore for she only want to just disappear out of sheer embarrassment.

"I should probably go. Thanks for your time, Mr. Allen."

"It's nothing. And please it's just Barry." He said and flashed her a smile which earned him a glare from Caitlin.

When Patty was finally out of sight, Cisco was the first one to address the elephant in the room and he did that by saying,

"I don't if it's just me or that was totally awkward."

"What was?" Caitlin asked nonchalantly, making Barry snort.

"Alright, I'm sensing a lover's quarrel. I'll be in my workstation, thank you very much." Cisco said as he grabbed his food and drink and made his way out of the cortex but not before thanking Caitlin one last time and making her promise to keep in touch which she assured him that she would.

"Okay, now care to tell me what was that about?" Barry asked as he sat down on a chair next to where Caitlin had settled herself.

"I don't know what you're talking about." She shrugged.

"Oh Caity, are you jealous?" He said, as a smirk found its way on his face.

"Please, Barry. Are you hearing yourself? I'm Dr. Caitlin Snow, I don't get jealous." She spat as she stood up and pretended to busy herself with a paper weight on the table.

Barry followed closely behind her, putting both of his hands on either side of the table, trapping her in the process. Caitlin could feel his warm breath tickling her as he spoke,

"Are you sure? Because the Dr. Caitlin Snow that I know wouldn't do such a thing for she values professionalism. And do I need to remind you that we're in my workplace?"

"Barry, that's just a simple kiss of greeting. Don't give too much meaning into it." She spat as she turned around, pushing Barry out of her way but he wouldn't budge.

"Really? You didn't do it because you feel jealous and you felt the sudden need to protect your possessions?" He smiled smugly at her as he moved his face an inch closer to hers.

Caitlin would've commented on his use of the word "possessions" but it didn't help that his face was that close to her, not to mention his eyes that were oh, so mesmerizing-

"Nope."

"Fine, if you say so. I guess you wouldn't mind if I return the favor."

"Barry-"

Before she knew it, Barry was kissing her hard, much like what she did earlier. His lips were demanding and hungry and she couldn't do anything but kiss back. She felt his hands caressing her hips as he lifted her up on the table.

Caitlin felt a sensation that's both foreign and familiar. As if something inside her awakened but the strange thing is, she didn't know it was there in the first place. Barry seemed to be the one provoking it, much like what he did with every bit of her being.

She was brought back to her senses when she felt Barry kissing her neck. She didn't even realize his lips left her mouth until he was whispering something to her ear.

"Jealousy suits you very well, Dr. Snow."

She didn't even try to think of a witty comeback but instead, she put her hand around his neck while her leg went to hook in one of his. She was about to kiss him again when Cisco's voice boomed through the speakers.

 **"Guys, seriously. If you want to kiss and make up, this isn't the place to do that. Geez, this is still an office you know. People work in here!"**

They both chuckled at that as Caitlin got down from the table and this time, successfully shoving him out of the way. She made her way to where the takeout bags were and asked,

"You hungry?"

"Starving." He said and winked at her.

She just rolled her eyes at his double meaning and proceeded to taking out his food from the bag and handling it to him.

After having lunch together, Caitlin insisted on leaving, telling him that she has an important matter to attend to.

"I thought you canceled all your afternoon schedule today." He asked from where he sat as Caitlin went to grab her purse on the table.

"I did." She shrugged.

"So if it wasn't work then what is it exactly?"

"I'll tell you some other time but I really have to go now." She walked over to him and kissed him goodbye but before she can turn around to leave, Barry caught her wrist.

"Mind if I go with you?" His eyes were pleading hers and her heart swelled at his concern but she knew she needed to do this alone.

"Babe, I appreciate your concern but I think I...I need to do this alone."

He sensed something's up with her so he asked, "You know you can tell me anything, right?"

"I know and I really appreciate it. Don't worry, I'm gonna be fine."

He knew she'd tell him whatever it is that's bothering her so for now, he let the matter go.

"Fine. Just don't forget to give me call later, okay?"

"Okay."

* * *

As she drove through the busy streets of Central City, Caitlin let herself reminisce about all that's happened in her life the past few months. Sure there were more difficult ones than good but now she feels like she's ready to move past that. And she's determined to start by accomplishing the first and rather the most important thing that came to her mind.

After several minutes of driving, she reached her destination and proceeded to park her car in the nearest lot. She took a couple of steps on the grass patch until she came face to face to her father's tombstone.

She put the flowers down beside the stone, her fingers lightly tracing the name engraved on it. Tears were slowly building at the corners of her eyes when she thought of the last time she came in here.

She was so angry back then that she didn't even cry tears of longing for his father but tears of hatred and agony. She was a wreck, so messed up that she forgot how to be his daughter.

But now that she had found ways to heal, ways to be his daughter again, she couldn't help but feel guilty for all the anger she held against him. Deep down she knew she wouldn't have the closure she deserved but this is as close as she can get so she decided to make the most out of it.

"Hi, dad. It's been a while...I know our last conversation didn't go as well as I had hoped but I just want to let you know that if only I could go back in time, I would. I would've told you that I've forgiven you...even when I'm still hurting at that time. I would've told you that I love you too even when I didn't understand why would you do such a thing."

The sky seemed to cry with her for the moment her tears dropped into the grass, so has the rain. It's just a light drizzle so Caitlin decided to stay a bit longer.

"I'm sorry if I didn't get to be your daughter until your last minute, Dad. I know it's already too late but I hope you could forgive me."

Tears were now flowing freely from her eyes, together with all the bottled up emotions she kept for a long time. All the pain, hatred and betrayal were slowly fading away as she continued to say the very words she didn't get to tell her father while he was still alive.

With a lighter heart and guilt-free conscience, Caitlin decided that it's time for her to go home. She dragged herself up, together with her soaked clothes and made her way to her car but not before turning around and uttering the words,

"Goodbye, Dad."

* * *

 **END OF PART TWENTY ONE**


	22. Chapter 22

It's almost ten in the evening when Caitlin arrived home. The rain is pouring heavily outside, making her shiver as she ran from her car to the safety of her house. She went straight to her room, taking a hot shower to somehow rid her of the cold.

She changed into her nightgown, turning up the heater as the rain outside made her room a bit chilly. She immediately flopped down on the bed, bouncing slightly as she let all the weariness take over her body.

It wasn't until five minutes later when she was awakened from her much needed sleep by a sound coming from her balcony. She ignored it, having no energy to deal with something she was sure her mind's just making up because there's no way, considering her home's security system, can there be anything that-

She abruptly sat up on the bed, grabbing the nearest hard object she could find to protect her from whatever it is that's trying to enter her room. She thought of screaming but that could only put her in a more vulnerable position.

She quickly hid on the other side of her bed when she heard the glass door to her balcony sliding, thinking that she'll use the element of surprise to her advantage. Without a bit of hesitation, she jumped over the bed and ran to the hooded figure, ready to attack with all her might.

"Woah, woah, woah! Cait it's me, Barry!"

The hooded figure, who happened to be her boyfriend, grabbed the object from her hand and let out a small chuckle.

"Seriously? A hardbound book? Do you honestly think-ow!"

"What the hell, Barry?! You almost scared me to death!" She screamed, hitting his arm again.

"Okay, I'm sorry. I'm just worried because you haven't called and you weren't answering my calls either. I need to make sure you're alright." He said, examining her through the light coming from the lampshade.

"But do you really have to climb up the balcony to do that? You could've at least knock on the front door. It's not like they don't know you here." She said, placing a hand on the side of her head as she suddenly felt a bit dizzy.

"Of course I thought of doing that first. But just so you know, your house is huge. I bet you won't even hear me even if I scream my lungs out."

She was about to say something but Barry beat her to it. "And your helpers are already in their quarters so I didn't mind bothering them."

"So you just thought of climbing up the balcony in this bad weather?" She placed a hand on her hip and looked at him with a raised brow.

He gave her a cheeky smile and said, "Yes?"

"I would've commended you for your effort if only you didn't scare me half to death. Barry-"

Before she could utter another word, she feels her vision blurring and the world spinning around her. Just as she was about to fall, she felt two strong arms grabbing her from behind.

"Cait! You okay?" Barry's concerned voice came ringing through her ears.

"I'm fine. Just a little...tired." She had her hands wrap around his arm for support. She felt his hands touching her forehead and neck.

"Cait, you're hot."

She didn't know why but she felt a tug on her lips when she heard that. "I know. You told me twice today already."

"No baby, I mean you're burning. Your temperature's high. Are you feeling okay?"

"Ohh...I may have overlooked that one. I know I shouldn't have stayed under the rain for too long." She mumbled into his shoulder.

Barry's brows furrowed in confusion. He knew Caitlin wouldn't be the one to do such a thing especially when she knew she could catch a cold or something worse. She always had her doctor instincts with her so what was she really doing this afternoon that made her forget to look after her own health?

He's starting to get more worried than he was this afternoon when she told him she had something important to do. He's determined to know the answers but Caitlin's weak voice made him abandon that thought and focused on making her feel better.

"It's...c-cold." She said, making Barry realize that his jacket is still drenched in rain.

He settled her down on a nearby chair as he got rid of his wet clothes. He then proceeded to carry her to the bed, tucking her underneath the warm covers.

He made his way to her walk-in closet where he found his own stack of clothes. He managed to build his own collection since he always find himself staying over at her place. He put on some sweatpants and a white shirt and rummaged through her cabinet for a thicker blanket.

When he got back to her bed, Caitlin was shivering more visibly so he immediately wrapped her up with the blanket.

"Cait? Get up babe, you need to drink some medicine." He whispered, running a hand up and down her back to sooth her.

She just groaned and buried herself deeper into the sheets which made Barry suppress a laugh. Who knew that the health conscious Dr. Snow could be this stubborn when sick.

"Caity, come on. I promise you'll feel better after drinking this. It's just a teeny tiny tablet that could really help your condition. Now, be a good girl and I assure you there's nothing to be scared about this thing." He cooed and that seemed to work but not in the way he hoped because he could feel her glare burning through him even when he can barely see in the dim light.

"I'm a doctor, Barry. Of course I know that's not _scary_. Geez." She spat and took the blanket to cover her head as well.

He let out a sigh at her actions, "Even when you're sick, you're still as feisty I see-ow!"

She piched his arm through the sheets and he just knew there's a smirk in her face. He then poked her in return asking her to drink the medicine again. After about his fifth try, Caitlin abruptly sat up on the bed and snatched the tablet from him, drank it with water and settled herself back to bed.

"Now, that wasn't hard, was it?"

He was faced by silence so he decided it was time for him to get some rest as well. Whatever questions he had, it'll just have to wait until she gets better. He settled himself underneath the covers beside her, drawing her close by wrapping his arms around her as he placed her head on his chest.

"Barry...what are you doing?" She said without opening an eye.

"Body heat."

"You're going to get sick too."

"Nah, I can't have my girl shivering to death now, can I?"

She smiled against his chest and kissed his neck then said, "Thanks, baby."

"Anytime. Now go get some sleep."

During the entire night, Barry had been barely able to sleep. Between checking up on his patient, he couldn't seem to set aside his questions as to what Caitlin had done this afternoon.

He knew they'd been just officially together for almost a month now but still he couldn't let himself be comfortable with them keeping things from each other. They've always had that connection, that bond of solid trust that secrets have made no place in their relationship.

After some time, he managed to drift off to sleep but it was cut short when he felt the first ray of sunshine creeping through the windows about an hour after.

It's already past eight when Caitlin woke up. There's still a bit pounding in her head but she feels so much better than she did when she arrived last night.

She reached to the other side of the bed to make sure that Barry, climbing up her balcony last night, wasn't just because of her fever but when she found out he wasn't there, she slowly sat up and rubbed her face.

She thought of checking her phone and she was quite shocked to see a lot of messages, missed calls and voicemails all from Barry. She felt guilty for forgetting to call him when she arrived but what bugs her the most is that she didn't expect him to be that worried about her.

She was brought out of her thoughts when she heard the door opening, revealing Barry with a breakfast tray on his hands. She gave him a smile of appreciation but his reply was a frown and a pair of questioning eyes. Before she can come up with an explanation, he asked,

"What happened to your eyes? Have you been crying, Cait?"

Caitlin must've forgotten about that as well for she didn't exactly expect for her to get sick and things just went by in a blur last night.

Barry's immediately on her side, setting the tray on the nightstand as he continued to examine her face. She knew she couldn't keep things from him any further, not that she is in the first place. So she took his hands that were currently on her face and gave it a reassuring squeeze and said,

"I'm sorry if I made you worry. I didn't mean to not call you last night it's just that I had a lot of things in my mind yesterday and when I got home, my body begged for some rest so I-"

"Hey, it's okay I understand. You were sick and all so you really can't stop me from worrying but Cait what really bothers me is why you let yourself be drenched in rain when you know you can get sick. You re a doctor and believe me that even before, you were very strict when it comes to this matter so is there some reason why this happened?"

She was silent for awhile, staring at the cream-colored sheets as she tried to put her thoughts in order. She can feel Barry's stare in her and she knew he deserved to know the truth.

"You don't have to tell me if you're not ready. I just can t help but-"

"It's okay, you deserve to know Barry." She looked at him straight in the eyes, took a deep breath before proceeding, "I went to the cemetery to visit my dad."

His eyes visibly widened but no words came out of his mouth. She took that cue to continue.

"I had a talk with my secretary yesterday and she told me that my father did love me despite everything that's happened. I...I was surprised that when that topic came up, I wasn't that hurt anymore. It felt like I've already forgiven him, I just didn t realize it yet."

"Are you okay? I mean, you were crying under the rain-"

"Okay, you don't have to make it sound like that. I got carried away and the sky must've felt the need to join me so yeah. It's just-it felt great to finally tell him the things I didn't had the chance to tell him before."

"Well, that s good to hear. I'm glad you were able to make peace with past."

"I'm happy too. Finally, I can actually focus on what's in front of me rather than always looking back at the past." She said, looking at him meaningfully and he just replied with one of his eager smiles.

Then he suddenly remembered something else, rather someone else who Caitlin might want to have a closure with just like she did with her father.

"But what about..." He really didn't mean to ask that but the words came stumbling out of his mouth before he realized.

"What is it?" She asked, brows furrowing at the troubled expression on his face.

"What about Ronnie? Are you..." He trailed off and then she understood what put that expression on his face. He was looking away when he continued, "I'm sorry I know I shouldn't be this intrusive when it comes to your life."

She kissed his cheek to reassure him and said, "You don't need to be sorry. But you're right about Ronnie though. I think it's a good idea to finally have a proper talk with him. If that's okay with you, babe?"

Her question made him look back at her, wondering why she would ask for his permission when she have all the control when it comes to her personal life. But the thought that she values his opinion that much actually made him happy so he said, "Of course. Anything that could help you cope will always be acceptable to me."

"Thanks."

After having breakfast in bed together, Caitlin remembered something she hadn't had the opportunity to tell Barry until now. She excused herself and untangled her body from his embrace as she went running out of the room, leaving Barry baffled. But his curiosity only intensified when she came back with a box in her hand, made her way to the sofa and put the box beside her, rummaging through its contents.

"Cait, you shouldn't be running around the house with your condition. Are you sure you're feeling alright now?" He asked worriedly as he approached her sitting form on the sofa.

"Barry, I told you I m better so stop being so overprotective."

She smiled at him cheekily, making him the one to roll his eyes. His attention then settled on the box she brought with her, more importantly, on its contents.

"What's that?"

"I should've told you this sooner but with everything that's happening, I didn't have the chance but here we are now so come on sit." She reached out her hand for him to take which he gladly did, letting her drag him to the space beside her.

She held up a smaller box in front of him and when she opened it, he exactly knew what's the rest of the box is.

"Are these...my letters?" He asked out loud although there's no way he wouldn't recognize his own handwriting.

"Yes. You re the only one I know who'd be cheesy enough to write these so I think there's no doubt that these came from you." She poked his cheek once, making him chuckle then he continued sorting through the compilation of letters.

"How did you even find these? I mean, you still don't remember anything, right?"

W"ell, after my dad died, he left me with a lot of things and this is just one of them. And for the record, I think that these are the only ones I really liked." She said, winking at him which made him smile goofily.

"Please, there's no question about that. But why would your dad have all these? Everything in this box... it's all about me."

She bit her lip before answering, "He... he wanted to make sure that I won't remember you. So he kept everything in this box."

He nodded in understanding but there were still things that he needed answers to, "But why would he keep it? Why wouldn't he just get rid of it for good if he doesn't want any memory of me to be known by you?"

"Because I think there's a part of him that refused to do that."

"What do you mean...? He hated my guts the moment he first saw me." He said, eyes growing dim at the memory.

"I know. But you know what his last words were before he died?"

He looked up at her, "What?"

"He wanted me to tell you how sorry he is for treating you the way he did." She put her hand up and down his arm soothingly, "And how remorseful he was for not giving you the chance when he knew you only had the best intentions for me."

Upon hearing those words, Barry found himself speechless. He knew how crude her father could be but he had long realized that he was only doing those things for his daughter. Yes, there were some point when he was unreasonable, intolerable, but Barry always understood.

And now that he knew how he felt in his last remaining seconds, he couldn't help the rush of emotions that overcame him. He had his head trapped between his hands as he tried to process everything he just heard. Caitlin, on the other hand, didn't stop from running her hand comfortingly down his back.

A few moments later, he finally looked up, hands wiping his face as he drew a deep breath. "I don't know exactly what to say but somehow, it felt really good to hear that. Although I wished I could've heard it from him so I could tell him that I understood and that I've forgiven him."

"Those were the words I came to tell him yesterday." She said, eyes downcast.

He embraced her from the side and said, "Oh Cait, I really wish you didn't have to go through that phase in your life."

She smiled sadly at him, "I guess we all have our fair shares of joy and pain. And that happens to be mine but you know what? I think I have finally moved on and I want you to know that I couldn't have done it without you so thank you, Barry. Thanks for saving me."

"That's the role I had to take when you decided to let me be your hero, right?"

She smiled that million dollar smile of hers and gave him a sweet kiss on the lips.

"Yes, it is."

* * *

"Are you sure you want me to be here?" Barry asked when they arrived at the restaurant where Caitlin decided to meet up with Ronnie a week after the talk they had about her father.

"Yeah. But if you really don't want to then you can stay in the car. I promise I won't be long."

"Ah, nope. I'd lose my mind thinking of what he might do to you so I'd probably stay."

"Well then, I think there's nothing to argue about. Come on, he's probably waiting inside."

They made their way inside to the private portion of the restaurant, a small room with tainted glass as walls accompanied by a spiral staircase that leads to the wine cellar in the second floor.

As soon as they reached their destination, they were greeted by a nervous-looking Ronnie.

"Hey, Barry." He cleared his throat before extending a hand for Barry to shake.

Barry gladly returned the gesture and shot a glance to Caitlin's direction to see how she was taking all of these. She seemed calm and composed, giving a small smile at Barry when he looked her way.

"Hi Cait - Caitlin, it's uhm..good to see you again." Ronnie said, trying his best to put up a smile.

"Its good to see you too, Ronnie. So uh, shall we?" Caitlin asked, gesturing to both of them to take their respective places around the table.

However, Barry remained on his spot after pulling out the chair for his girlfriend. He knew they both needed privacy and even if it was Caitlin's idea that he should join them, he felt compelled to give them the necessary space and time.

Caitlin looked at him with questioning eyes but he just gave her an apologetic smile and said,

"I'll leave you two alone so you could talk properly." He told them then he went to Caitlin's side and said, "I'll be upstairs if you need me."

Caitlin gave him a look of understanding and he leaned down to kiss her cheek and went on his way but not before returning the nod initiated by Ronnie.

Barry went up the stairs and settled to a couch on the side of the terrace, overlooking the table he just left Caitlin and Ronnie in. He didn't want to be the kind of guy who would pretend to be the bigger man. So when he witnessed the way Ronnie's face contorted to that of remorse, regret and most importantly of that utmost humility, he knew it was time for him to look away.

He took a sip of his wine before he stood up, depriving himself of seeing how their conversation would turn out.

He wouldn't witness how Ronnie shed a few tears of regret, or how it fell together with the sincerest apology. He wouldn't know how he refused to tell her how much he loves her still, instead he resorted to faking a smile and saying that he was indeed, genuinely happy for them.

He wouldn't know how Caitlin told him that it was all in the past, that she had forgiven him so he should forgive himself too. He wouldn't know how they shared a quick hug as they bid goodbye to each other and probably to anything else they've shared in the past.

Barry continued his exploration among the kegs, remembering that simple knowledge about how the wine tastes better with age. He couldn't help but to reflect that into his own life, his own experiences about how things got better through time.

He smiled, knowing that whatever will come their way, they're gonna get through it together. Just like what they did with their previous problems, nightmares that come to haunt them sometimes.

"There you are. I've been looking everywhere for you."

He was brought out from his reverie by Caitlin's voice calling out to him from the beginning of the aisle he was in.

"Cait? What are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to be talking to Ronnie?" He said as he approached her slowly.

"I was. But it's already an hour since you left us. Are you okay? You seem a bit out of it.

He shrugged, "I'm fine, just thinking. So how did it go?"

"It went well. We finally had the closure we needed."

"That's great. Where's Ronnie by the way?"

"He already left. He said he has some packing up to do."

"What for?"

"He's moving to Star City for good. Apparently, he's been meaning to talk to me when he first learned about the job offer but he wasn't sure how to approach me after everything that's happened."

"Well, it's kind of the perfect timing that you decided to talk to him, don't you think?"

"It is. At least now I don't have any unfinished business to think of."

They both smiled at each other until Caitlin took his hand and dragged him out of the restaurant. Barry was surprised that it's almost dark outside, the sun setting in the horizon. He felt a tug on his hand and he was soon face to face with a beaming Caitlin.

"Come on, I want to show you something."

His brows furrowed at her invitation, "Where are we going?"

"It's a surprise."

* * *

The next thing he knew, they were standing side by side on top of her office building waiting for the helicopter to arrive. Barry was beyond ecstatic, bouncing on his feet a few times while asking an exasperated Caitlin where they were actually going.

"I told you, it's a surprise." She winked at him which only made him more curious.

"Just one more clue. Pleeease?" He pleaded with her with his best puppy eyes.

"Ah, not happening." She said as she bopped his nose with her finger.

"How will I know if our destination is a safe place? You know I can sue you if something bad happens to me, right?" He crossed his arms in front of his chest and narrowed his eyes at her, making her laugh at his child-like antics.

"Please, Barry. I see you're dying to know where we're going but you could've saved yourself some dignity. Sue me, really?" Her laugh only intensified at his frowning face.

"Fine, fine. How did you even afford a helicopter ride?"

She just gave him a _really_ look and he wanted to smack himself too for asking such dumb question. How could he forget that his girlfriend came from money? All this waiting and surprises doesn't really work out for him in a good way.

A few minutes later, the helicopter arrived and before Barry could move from his spot, Caitlin is dragging him inside.

The view from up top was breathtaking, the city lights gleaming from below makes everything feel so surreal. There was a comfortable silence sitting between them and Barry couldn't deny how she looked so beautiful with her windswept hair as the city lights reflected on her oh so expressive eyes.

"It's beautiful." She whispered.

"You're beautiful." He said as he gave her hand a gentle squeeze.

Caitlin tried to hide her burning cheeks by slightly looking away but his quick fingers managed to tilt her chin and gave her a sweet kiss. She kissed him back and said, "Thanks."

She went to grab his tie, loosening it a bit as she drew him closer to her. He smirked at her actions, a playful glint shining in his eyes but before he could lean in for another kiss, she was using his tie as a makeshift blindfold. He tried to remove it but Caitlin's hands stopped his from doing so.

"A surprise, remember?"

He can't see her but he can hear the smirk in her voice.

"Such a tease, Dr. Snow."

"All im good time, Mr. Allen. All in good time."

They stayed like that a few moments later, with Caitlin massaging his hands and kissing his cheek from time to time. Barry would only groan in frustration, making her giggles a bit louder each time.

He drew a sigh of relief when he felt the helicopter stop moving. Caitlin's hands were guiding him out of the helicopter, making him walk a few meters away as the helicopter left. He could smell something that resembles to that of pine trees and he became aware of the cricket sounds as the sound of the helicopter grew softer and softer.

He was once again dragged by Caitlin, slowly this time so he won't stumble upon his own feet. He heard a door clicking and soon enough he was making his way up the stairs. He felt the temperature rising, making him relax in such a homey environment. He heard another door opening and he can sense Caitlin's presence stop in front of him.

"Remove your blindfold."

She ordered and he didn't need to be told twice so he eagerly tore the necktie from his eyes and if he thought that the view from the helicopter was breathtaking, then he was surely mistaken. Because right in front of him is the view of the whole city, coming from...the mountain side?

He took a quick look at his surroundings and he couldn't believe he was in a very much modern-looking cabin, right at the side of the mountain, almost teasing death as it sat on the edge of a cliff.

He was a loss for words at the beauty of it, the extravagance, it's enchanting. He turned to see Caitlin, smiling at him gorgeously.

"This is...I-this, Cait-"

"It's safe to say that you like it?"

He nodded furiously and she felt a warm sensation enveloping her seeing him like this, so full of joy and admiration.

"But this will only serve as the viewing deck." She said, leading him to the railing of the spacious wooden-floored terrace.

"For what?"

"The surprise, silly."

"What exactly-"

"Just look straight ahead," She took a quick glance on her watch, "in 3...2...1..."

Then it happened.

The night sky was dancing with different colors, shapes and sizes as the fireworks flaunted themselves one by one. He embraces Caitlin from behind, encasing her hands in his without peeling his eyes off of the view.

Caitlin leaned back to his chest as he tightened his grip on her. They just stood there in awe, in more ways than they can explain. What they felt is something indescribable, too many emotions at once but one thing's for sure, they were happy.

The moment the show ended, Caitlin turned in his arms only to see Barry holding back his tears. She giggled once again, tiptoed to plant a long sweet kiss on his lips and soon he was the one laughing, twirling her around as he did so.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you." He said in between kisses, making her let out a full blown laughter.

"Barry, stop! You don't need to thank me you know." She said as he finally put her down.

"I just...I can't believe you actually did all that for me. What's the occasion?" He asked, his hands firmly placed in either side of her waist, keeping her in place.

"Nothing. I just wanted to thank you...for everything."

"Cait, you don't need to-"

"But I want to. I know you're not expecting anything in return for everything that you sacrificed for me but you deserve it, this amd more. Giving back with material things won't even begin to cover how much I appreciate you so I'm giving you something else."

"But-"

"Don't even try to argue." She glared at him.

He rolled his eyes but he smiles at her nonetheless, "Fine then, what is it?"

"I chose fireworks for a reason actually."

"Oh?"

She hummed in response, "It symbolizes a fresh start, a new beginning so I'm making you a promise."

"Of what?"

"Of the future."

* * *

 **END OF PART TWENTY-TWO**

* * *

 **AN: Would you look at that...This fic is actually coming to an end so I want to thank you all for taking your time to read this. Hope you enjoyed this one!**

 **-A**


	23. Chapter 23

"Barry, I know you're my boyfriend now but you really have to stop digging holes in my garden. You're ruining the landscape!"

Caitlin shouted from the gazebo, a crease forming on her forehead for this is not how she planned her peaceful Saturday afternoon to be. They were supposed to have tea outside her garden (which was totally sophisticated for Barry's liking) when she brought up the picture she saw at his bedside table when she spent the night at his place.

Barry started telling her the story of how they tied the knot in the marriage booth when his face suddenly lit up at his mention of their promise rings. The next thing she knew, he was begging the gardener to lend him a shovel. Before she could comprehend what was happening, he started digging holes in her garden, much to her dismay.

It's still early in the afternoon and the sun is far from setting, making Barry's little adventure harder than he would've preferred. He knew they buried it just a feet from the huge tree but now that the tree has been cut down, he didn't have the exact place for it so he started digging the ground to where he supposed it could've been.

A few tiring moments and seven molehills later, he found himself sitting on the ground with his button down shirt sticking to his body like a second skin. His fingernails dirtied with soil and his hair is slick with sweat. He closed his eyes for a breather until he felt that the sun is no longer pricking on his skin.

"Lemonade?"

Barry opened an eye to see Caitlin looking down at him with a drink in her hand and a couple of things in the other, including an umbrella. She settled the other things on a nearby chair before handing him the drink. He took the glass from her and drank it in one go.

"Thanks, babe."

"I'm still mad at you for ruining my garden you know."

He just smiled and was about to embrace her in a tight hug when she put a hand to his chest to stop him.

"What?" He asked, brows furrowing in confusion.

"Take off your shirt."

He raised a questioning brow at her before saying, "It's too early for that, don't you think? And considering that we were outside...huh, I didn't know you have it in you, Dr. Snow." He finishes with a playful wink.

"Gosh, Barry! You and your perverted mind." She said, shaking her head but a faint blush is creeping up her cheeks.

"Hey! You're the one provoking me. Remember asking me to take off my shirt? I wouldn't have given a different meaning to it if you weren't looking at me with your sexy eyes."

"Shut up. I don't know what you're talking about." She looked away, trying to look unaffected by biting her lower lip to prevent the smile from showing up. But she fails, miserably.

"Of course you do-"

"Just take your damn shirt off."

"Ooh, getting a bit aggressive now, are we Dr. Snow?" He smirked and she had to roll her eyes at that before replying,

"Fine. If you're too stubborn to do it, I'll do it." She said as she starts unbuttoning his shirt clumsily. He keeps trying to catch her eye but she wouldn't give him the satisfaction of teasing her any further.

After she did the last one, she carefully took his shirt off with Barry doing anything but helping, a sly smirk firmly etched on his face. She placed it on the nearby chair and came back with a towel and a clean white shirt.

"If you're too insistent on destroying my garden's beautiful landscape, at least do it without sacrificing your health. You'll get sick if you let the sweat dry up on your body."

Barry was way beyond baffled by her actions. She's wiping the sweat off his body with a towel, her signature furrowed brows and crinkled nose made their way to her face as she remained concentrated on her task. He just stood there staring, admiring her in every way he could.

"Barry?"

"Yeah?"

"I said raise your arm up."

"O-okay."

He answered and obeyed without actually thinking about it. He's still hung up on Caitlin's actions he completely forgot that he's-

"Wait! Cait, I'm-"

A string of incomprehensible things started coming out of his mouth the moment her hands touched his underarm. He tried his best to stop squirming but clearly, Caitlin had figure out a way to get back at him and is happily taking advantage of her newfound knowledge.

"I didn't know you were ticklish, Mr. Allen." She said breathlessly, half because of her laughing at him and the other half because their tickle fight required a lot of energy. By a lot it meant stumbling to the ground with her falling on top of him.

"I'm not gonna live this down, now do I?"

"Nope. The sound of you squealing like a little girl will never be forgotten for as long as we both shall live." She bopped his nose with her index finger as she rested both of her elbows on his chest for support. Her smile is wide, almost intoxicating and he didn't waste a single second to plant a chaste kiss on her lips.

Before he could go for another one, he felt her weight being lifted up as she slowly stood up, dusting her sundress off. She extended her hand to him which he gladly accepted and helped him up to his feet.

"I think it's time you take a shower."

"Not yet. I still have a task to finish."

"Well, if you mean destroying my garden then I think that's a job well done." She gestured to the random holes and molehills he created around the garden.

"Baby, I promise I'll fix that after. I just need to find something." He said, flashing her a cheeky smile.

"If you're looking for a treasure chest, I'm pretty sure I don't have that in my garden." She crossed her arms in front of her to emphasize that she's serious (and that she probably didn't want her beloved garden to be salvaged more than it already is).

"Trust me, it's more than just a treasure." He winked at her yet again and went back to digging but not before giving her a kiss on her cheek.

Caitlin just rolled her eyes at that. Knowing that Barry is just as stubborn as she is, she let him be but stayed just to hold the umbrella to protect them from the sun's heat.

It took about two hours and a half for him to finally find his target. He let out a shout of triumph and a raised fist when he felt the shovel strike a familiar metal box, his eyes lighting up at the sight of it.

"I found it!" He raised the box in front of her, dusting it off as he did so.

"You spent so much effort just to look for an old metal box?"

"It's not the box that I'm after. It's what inside of course."

"Then why don't you show me the reason for making my garden suffer such tragedy, Mr. Allen?"

"I would but I'd probably save it for a good night's story later. Now, I think it's best that I take the shower you offered."

"Wait, you're not planning on spending the night here, are you?"

"Well, now that you've mentioned it, I think that's great idea." He said, his eyes lighting up.

"Barry, that's not what I meant. You-"

"Cait, I'm tired and hungry. I don't think I can drive myself home. Do you really want your boyfriend to pass out on his way home?" He whined.

Caitlin knew that this is just one of his schemes to spend more time with her (not that she's complaining though, in fact she loves that idea just as much as he does). But it wouldn't hurt to see him beg just a little more, right? Besides, it's the least she could do to make him pay for what he's done to her garden so she said,

"It wasn't my idea to go around my perfectly landscaped garden digging holes so yeah. I think the boyfriend deserves to pass out on his way home."

"Aww, baby. You don't mean that, right? I know you love me more than your garden." His eyes were challenging her, coaxing that ever elusive mushy side of hers but she knew better than to give in to his whims, especially after what he's done to her garden.

"Well..."

"Caity..." He said, pouting his lips a bit more.

She rolled her eyes, giving in to his whining. "Alright, fine. Go take a shower before I change my mind. I don't want my house to stink because of you."

"Stinky, huh?"

A glint of mischievousness shone in his eyes and Caitlin knew all too well what he was thinking. Honestly, she didn't like it one bit so when he spread his arms wide and took a teasing half step towards her, she immediately took a horrified step back.

"Wait, no, no, no-Barry!"

Her attempt at running away was clearly abandoned when she felt two sweaty arms wrapping around her strongly, making her cringe a bit. The more she tried to break free, the more his grip tightened around her. Soon enough, her screams turned into giggles as Barry started tickling her sides and peppering kisses on her cheek, neck and shoulders.

"Who's stinky now, huh?"

"Ugh, I hate you." She said but kissed his cheek nonetheless.

"I love you too. Now, let's go take a shower."

Not wanting to let go of her, Barry carried her bridal style and went inside the house. Caitlin would've complained but the feeling of being in his arms like this just feels right, so good that she felt herself revel in everything that is him. She snaked an arm around his neck and nibbled on his earlobe just to see if she had the same effect on him as he had on her.

As soon as her lips made contact on his skin, he immediately stopped. Barry took a deep breath before looking down at her, his voice dropping in to a low baritone when he whispered in her ear,

"Cait..." There's a warning in his voice.

"What?" She asked, feigning innocence.

"If you keep doing that we won't make it to the showers you know. Where are your helpers anyway?"

She glanced at her watch before answering, "It's almost six so I guess they retreated back to their quarters just past the swimming pool area. Why?"

"Nothing. But it's good to know that we can have some privacy." He said, smirking playfully. "So...shower?"

"Yeah."

Barry proceeded to carry her up to her room, opened the door and put her down the moment they reached her bed.

"Should I go first or..." He leaned closer, nibbled on her earlobe just the way she did to him earlier then whispered, "You want to go together?"

The effect on her was instant, cheeks burning red, heartbeat going crazy, senses suddenly aware of his every touch on her body. She tried looking down to hide her face but the intensity of his gaze lingers on the corner of her eyes.

She heard him chuckle at her flustered expression and she knew all too well the teasing she's about to get so she beat him to it by slightly jabbing her elbow into his stomach. She smiled at the pained sound he made, ignoring his sly comments as she tried with all her strength to push him inside the bathroom and close the door the moment he was in.

Caitlin couldn't help her thoughts from drifting off to that less explored portion inside her mind which always seemed to be agitated whenever Barry teases her in _that way_. She feels an uncontrollable sensation warming her up on the inside as she flopped down on the bed wondering how can that man, currently standing under the steamy shower, can turn her into a lovestruck teenager with such simple gestures.

She remained in that position for who knows how long, upper body sprawled across the sheets with her legs dangling freely on one side of the bed as she kept her eyes closed, a bright smile forever plastered on her face. She thinks of how happy she turned out to be, with him being the reason for everything she smiles about. Words will never be enough for her to explain how Barry makes her feel-free, safe, content, _at home_. The list could go on and on but there's one more feeling she's yet to explore with him.

She blushes at the thought of it, although both of them wouldn't deny the tension that sometimes do more than keep their urges under control. It scratches at that part of her mind again and she couldn't help but wonder if they have done it before. Although deep down she thinks she already knew the answer to that.

"Cait?"

"Hmm?" She hummed in response, eyes still closed as she tried to ignore the amused tone in his query.

"I'm done with the shower."

"Yeah, alright."

Barry just looked at her confused, wondering what she was daydreaming about. He has seen this look before, one that he thought he would never see again after the accident but now that it's actually in front of him, he couldn't help the admiration swelling at the pit of his stomach.

He could stare at her forever, lose himself in her smile til the end of his days but the soil stains on her skin and dress prevents him from being totally consumed by his own daydream so he asked again,

"Babe? Aren't you going to clean yourself up?"

"I'll be right there. Just one more minute." She said as she laid there unmoving, making the lines in his forehead deepen with curiosity.

"Baby, I don't want to ruin your daydreaming-whatever it may be about-but I need you to get up now."

She groaned in frustration as she abruptly sat up, having already formed the words in her mind to let him know that one, she isn't daydreaming and two, if she was then he did a good job at ruining it.

"Barry-"

Her words got caught up in her throat the moment she opened her eyes and was met by a view she most definitely didn't expect to see. Her face was literally inches apart from his abdomen, still shiny from his bath with small droplets of water slowly traveling one by one to the edge of the towel he had hanging dangerously low on his waist. Her eyes were tempted to follow one and she subconsciously bit her lower lip when the droplet made contact with the trail of small hair going down to-

"Cait? Are you okay?"

"Yeah... I-I'm fine."

Her stuttering didn't go unnoticed by him and he knew very well she rarely does, so he looked to where her line of sight goes and he just knew the very words to make her stuttering a bit more.

"My eyes are up here, you know."

She didn't need to look up to see he's smirking so she shrugged and said, "Of course. I was just-"

"Admiring the view?"

"What-"

"I know what you're thinking right now."

"I-"

"You're probably cursing the accident for making you forget all about this." He took a step back, catching her eyes in his as he gestured to his body, winking as her face contorted from bewilderment to confusion and finally like a deer caught in the headlights.

"I-this, that's not what I'm thinking! You're so full of yourself, you know that?" She tried not to sound defensive, only to fail miserably. Her eyes where anywhere but in his direction and Barry couldn't be more amazed by her reaction.

He took one of her trembling hands and placed it gently above his abs, his voice husky when he said, "You don't need to be shy, babe. Trust me, you've seen more than this before. A lot more."

By this time, Caitlin's face couldn't be more flustered. Her cheeks has already reached the reddest it could get and her lips almost to point of bleeding as she relentlessly bit hard into it. So to avoid any more teasing and torture from this incorrigible handsome, attractive-

With a quick push and a sprint towards the bathroom, she locked herself up inside, one hand on her chest trying to calm her breathing as she leaned heavily on the door. And if she had doubts as to what "level" their relationship has reached before, Barry's words left no questions unanswered. Her thundering heartbeat is almost deafening but it did nothing to suppress her hearing of Barry's victorious laughter from the opposite side of the door.

 _You're in deep trouble, Allen._

She would have to find a way to get back at him because there's no way he would get out of this unscathed. She'll get even no matter what.

She always does.

* * *

After having dinner, Caitlin found Barry on her room, sitting at the edge of her bed as he tinkers with the small metal box in his hands. There's a lot of emotions displaying on his eyes but most of it seems to be that of longing, mix with a hint of nostalgia.

Her brows knit together as she grew more and more curious as to what could be hiding in that tiny box that he spent so much time to retrieve from deep beneath the ground. She approached him slowly, his eyes crinkling on the side at the acknowledgement of her presence.

"I just hope you have a background story good enough for me to forget the mess you made in my garden, Mr. Allen."

"Of course I have, Dr. Snow."

He smiled at her, wrapping an arm around her waist as he let her sit on his lap.

"But I guess you'll have to wait until the right time comes." He said as he tucked the metal box under her bed, earning him an amused look on her face.

"But you said-"

"I know, I know. It's just that I have figured this isn't the best time for me to tell you." He smiled sheepishly at her.

"And why is that?" She adjusted herself on his lap so she could look at him directly.

"It's a secret."

"You don't get to keep secrets from me, Barry. I thought you already knew that."

"I do."

"So what happened to a relationship should be built with trust and love?"

"Well, let's just say that it's a secret with an expiration date."

"And that date will be on...?"

"That's part of the secret too."

She let out an exasperated sigh, "I hope you know that I don't like where this conversation is going."

"I'm perfectly aware, Cait. But I promise you, after this there'll be no more secrets. That's a promise without an expiration date."

"It better be." She smiled at him, drawing his face closer to hers as she wrapped her arms around his neck.

Barry didn't let the opportunity slide as he leaned forward to plant a kiss on the exposed skin on her neck. He lost himself as he had a whiff of her intoxicating scent. The jasmine has turned to vanilla but there's always that distinct smell that didn't change after all those years. And he hoped he would still be with her everyday from now on to make sure it's always going to be there.

The scent of home.

Of everything that is Caitlin Snow.

"Cait."

His lips still on her skin and that word alone is enough to send shivers all over her body.

She finds it hard to give a proper reply so she resolved to a monosyllabic, "Yes?"

"Tell me something." He mumbled, his face pulling away from her neck to look at her.

"About what?"

"The future you promised...what is it like?"

His question startled her a bit but she wouldn't deny that there are times when the thought has crossed her mind as well. Besides, it was her that made that promise to him in the first place.

"Well, there's you...and me. And we're happy."

He chucked at how her answer came out to be so straightforward and...short so he asked, "Details?"

"Details?" She echoed. She came to a point where she's sure with whom she'd want to spend her future with but her decision didn't come with how it's supposed to look like when they actually get there.

"Yeah. Like maybe, do you want us to live together?" He sheepishly asked, hoping he could find a confirmation to push through with the idea he just had earlier. "Or...or maybe do you think we could get-"

"Oh! I think living with you is a great idea. I mean, you practically live here anyways." She smiled at him, eyes shining with excitement, making him feel warm on the inside.

"Do you want us to live here? Or get a place of our own? How about...kids? Babe, do you want to have kids? I mean-if that's not too early to ask. I'd probably understand if you don't-that's okay. We'll just have a dog instead-"

His rambling was cut off by her angelic laughter. The way her body shakes on top of him send electricity down to his toes as he held her close. He looked at her with questioning eyes, thinking whether he said something funny.

"Did I say something ridiculous?"

She tried to contain her outburst before saying, "No, baby. It's just that I almost forgot what a visionary you are."

"You're making fun of me." He said, pouting his lips for added effect.

There were still lingering effects of laughter in her features when she said, "I'm not."

"Yes you are. But I want you to know I'm not ashamed of dreaming about what our future looks like. Even if you find it ridiculous."

"Hey, I don't." Her reply was met by his accusing brow so she continued, "Okay. First, I don't think we'll settle in this house. I know this is where I grew up in but it's just way too-"

"Big? And maybe you'd want something more simple and cozy so you could easily find where our kids have gone? That is if you want to have kids-"

"Yes and yes. I feel like you're worried about me not wanting to have kids but I'll have you know, Mr. Allen, that I do. I really do just maybe we can put that in the further part of our future together?"

"Of course. This is all hypothetical, Cait. I mean, at least for now." He gave her a smile that's so hopeful she couldn't do anything but nod enthusiastically.

"Alright. So in that note, I want us to have a hypothetical mini me and a hypothetical mini you."

"And what's the hypothetical name of the hypothetical mini you?"

"Well, there will be a lot of good ones in our hypothetical compilation of baby names but I guess I've always wanted to name my daughter-"

"Elizabeth?" He finishes.

"Yeah. So we can call her by the nickname of-"

"Ellie?"

Caitlin just nodded, a little awestruck by how Barry managed to somehow read her mind. She knew it was impossible so she resorted to the next plausible thing in line.

"I'm getting the feeling that we had this conversation before. Babe?"

He grinned, "Yeah, we did. And I'm so glad you're answers still remain the same."

"I am, too. Guess I haven't really changed after all, huh?"

He hummed in agreement as he buried his face on her neck again, drawing her close as returned to losing himself on her scent.

"Do you miss her?"

Her question made him stop nuzzling her neck to look up at her from under his lashes. Before he can ask her back, she said,

"The old me, do you miss her?"

His confusion turned to understanding when he heard her ask. It doesn't really matter to him if she doesn't remember anymore or if she'll never retrieve her memories but somehow, the look in her eyes tells him she wanted to.

"It's okay if you do. I...sometimes feel like I miss her too."

"What do you mean?"

"The flashbacks I'm getting...they make me feel less broken."

"You're not broken."

"But I was."

"Not anymore."

"That's because of you."

Her reply came sooner than he expected, like it was a well-rehearsed script that she kept in her mind to make him feel how much he means to her, to reassure him that she's alright. That she's okay enough for him not to worry.

"I love you." He said as he crashes his lips against hers, full of love and passion that it almost left her bruising. She reciprocates just as intense and when they finally broke apart she asked,

"What was that for?"

He shrugged before saying, "I just want you to know that I love you. Every piece of you, even the missing ones."

She smiled wholeheartedly at that, fighting the urge to cry over his sappiness when she said, "I love you too, you adorable romantic sap."

She leaned in for a chaste kiss, knowing that she'll never feel broken again as long as he's with her. She pulled away too soon for his liking, eliciting a groan from him and that's when she knows the perfect thing to do.

It's payback time.

"Barry?"

"Yeah?"

"If I still want to remember, would you still help me?"

"Of course. Anything you want, babe."

"Good. Because there's one thing that I'd really like to remember. And it's only you who could help with that."

She had a mischievous glint in her eyes as she drew her face closer to him, shifting on his lap to fully straddle him. He visibly swallowed hard and Caitlin knew that the odds are very much in her favor.

"Cait-"

She took advantage of his slightly opened mouth to give him a feverish kiss, slipping her tongue to tease his. Before he could return the gesture, she drew back, making him whimper.

Her smile was blinding but being the gentleman that he is, he had the decency to ask, "Wh-what exactly do you want to remember, Cait?"

"I thought you already knew the answer to that." She winked at him, going in for another kiss but he held a hand and said,

"Are you sure? I mean-"

"It's okay if you don't want to-"

"Of course I want to! I just-"

She silenced him with another kiss and this time, he didn't hesitate to kiss back with much hunger as she does. She smiled against his lips for his boldness, letting her know he had wanted to do this for who knows how long. She almost feels sorry for what she's about to do but you know what they say, what goes around comes around.

She takes her teasing a little further by pushing her hips against his, making him move them further into the mattress. Her hands came to rest on his chest, raking her nails over his shirt down to his abdomen where he first laid her hand on earlier. She broke the kiss long enough to remove his plain white shirt and that's when she started peppering kisses on his jaw then to his neck.

"Cait..." He softly whispered as she bit the sensitive spot below his ear, her fingers skimming along his abs.

She pinned him down on the bed, taking both of his hand in each of hers and placed it just above his head. She looked at him intently, her lips hovering above his just centimeters apart. She waited for him to close his eyes before she gave him a quick peck on his cheek then whispered breathlessly on his ear the words,

"Good night, Barry."

She rolled off of him and went to her side of the bed, leaving him frozen to where he laid. She chuckled at the priceless expression on his face before she tugged the covers from beneath him to tuck herself in.

He almost fell off the bed when she pulled the covers, making her succumb to yet another fit of giggles.

"Cait!"

"Glad you're back to your senses, Mr. Allen. Move over, you're hogging all the blankets." She said as she purposefully winked at him in such a flirtatious way.

His words came out of his mouth like a string of incomprehensible things and Caitlin's giggles turned into full blown laughter. She propped herself on one of her elbows and asked,

"Are you coming in or what?"

He grumbled under his breath before he begrudgingly tucked himself beneath the covers beside her. He mirrored her position, facing her and pointed an accusing finger towards her.

"I hope you know that there will be terrible, terrible consequences with regards to your previous actions, Dr. Snow."

She shrugged and said, "You started it. And you know I always get even Mr. Allen. Always."

"That's a low blow, you know that?"

"Eh, it's not. You're just saying that because my ways in getting back at you are proven to be far more effective."

He narrowed his eyes at her, "It may be effective now but I'll make sure that I'm not falling for that again next time."

"Who says there's going to be a next time?"

He opened his mouth only to close it again. His frown deepened as disappointment washed over his face. He mumbled a "good night" before he turned around and curled himself like a child. Caitlin fought the urge to laugh again because it's in rare times like this that Barry wants to be the one to receive her _tender loving care_.

Caitlin knew she wasn't the cheesy and sweet-like-sugar one in their relationship but for Barry, she's willing to try. And even if he wouldn't admit it, she knew he likes it when she tries to be mushy with him.

She scooted closer to him, pressing her body behind his as she let a finger graze slowly over his shoulder blade while dragging the words, "Ba...by...Bar...ry..."

He only groaned in response, making Caitlin smirk as she proceeded to continue with her way of "making amends".

"Babe, come on. You know I'm sorry, right?"

He mumbled something she couldn't quite comprehend so she came closer, leaning over his shoulder. She could see him trying his best to ignore her by looking asleep so she thought of using her newfound knowledge and gave his underarm a delicate jab with her index finger.

"Cait!" He abruptly turned to her, a murderous look in his eyes which she found adorable on him rather than intimidating.

"Well, that sure is effective." She smiled cheekily at him, only for his frown to deepen among his features.

He crosses his arms over his bare chest accompanied by a 'hmpf' as he continued to ignore her.

"Aww, my baby's all sad and sulky." She pouted her lips at him as she laid both of her arms on his with her chin resting on her overlapping hands.

"I'm sorry babe, will you forgive me?" She stressed each word with a kiss going from his bare chest to his neck to his cheek and finally his nose. She swore she could see his lips twitch to a smile, even for a split second.

He finally met her gaze and she knew she's close to cracking his façade. She nuzzled his neck before saying, "Tell you what?"

"Hm?"

"Next time there's no more teasing."

"So there's a next time?"

"Ahuh. And like I've said, no more teasing. Just...the _real_ thing."

That seemed to coax a goofy smile on his face and soon enough she could feel his arms wrapping around her, drawing her closer.

"You drive me crazy, Caitlin Snow."

"I know."

In that moment, Barry knew there's nothing that could stop him from pushing through with his plan. He's gonna do it no matter what.

He's going to marry Caitlin Snow.

* * *

 **END OF PART TWENTY-THREE**


	24. Chapter 24

_"Do you Barry Allen, take Caitlin Snow to be your lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold, in sickness and in health, in good times and woe, for richer or poorer, keeping yourself solely unto her from this day forward for as long as you both shall live?"_

 _"I do."_

 _"Do you Caitlin Snow, take Barry Allen to be your lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold, in sickness and in health, in good times and woe, for richer or poorer, keeping yourself solely unto her from this day forward for as long as you both shall live?"_

 _"Yes! I mean, I do."_

 _His smile grew wider at the beaming expression she had on her angelic face. The way she looked at him with so much love and adoration, the way she smiled at him like he was the world to her, the way she said those three magical words every single time with such intensity as the first, all of these things are way beyond him, things that are too precious for his little heart to contain. But if there's one thing he's sure of, it's that these things are something he refused to live without._

 _It's when he slid his ring on her finger that he knew she's the one, that he wanted it to be forever. That he'd do anything in his power to keep her, keep them on track until that someday, where they'd have this in reality. May it be on a beach, a church, a garden, wherever for as long as she'd be his bride. He'll marry her a thousand times if need be, just to make sure he'll forever be hers. Until the day when they'd be all wrinkly and wise but still as in love as they are right now._

 _He knew he looked so ridiculous right now, crying and smiling at the same time but he didn't give a damn about it. She's pretty much doing the same but somehow, the look made her more alluring and he can't help but fall harder when they finally leaned in for the kiss that sealed their marriage._

 _"I love you so much, Mrs. Allen."_

 _She didn't know whether to cry or laugh at the way he had addressed her so she ended up pretty much doing the same. She knew it was just a fake union between two teenagers in a marriage booth but to her, it's a declaration, a realization that he's the one she'd want to spend the rest of her life with._

 _"I love you too, Mr. Allen."_

 _They went in for another kiss, a promise of yesterday, today and what they hope to be a million more tomorrows together._

 _Later that night, Barry went to sneak into her house like he always did but with the realization of Caitlin's father being at home that day, he knew he had to take the alternative passage: the balcony._

 _It's a quarter past ten and he knew Caitlin would already be in her night attire waiting for him. And the thought of it made him more excited than he already was._

 _He secretly loves the way she looked in her sleepwear - so carefree and unapologetic - something she'd rarely let other people see. The mere thought of the exclusivity she most definitely willed to share with him is like her subtle way of making him know she's his. She may or may not acknowledge it the same way he did, it's still one of the most treasured things he can keep to himself._

 _And that, for him, meant the world._

 _He climbed up with so much caution, a bit for himself but a lot more for the single-stemmed rose he had tucked between his teeth. It's their "wedding night" after all and he'd be damned if he let this night be less special than he intended to._

 _When he finally reached the railings of the balcony, he silently jumped over it, dusting off his hands in the process. He knocked thrice, paused, another two, then a pause followed by the last three. It's kind of their secretive way of confirming each other's presence behind closed doors. Without sparing a beat, the glass doors were sliding open and before Barry could even remove the rose from his mouth, Caitlin has engulfed him in a tight hug, burying her face into his chest. The rose lay forgotten on the floor._

 _He immediately returned the hug, a smile making its way into his features as he inhaled the familiar scent of her hair. It wasn't long before he sensed that something is wrong with the way with which she clutched his shirt and his suspicions were proven true when he heard her sobbing along with words too muffled to comprehend._

 _"Cait? What's wrong babe?" He held her by the shoulders, gently nudging her face upwards to meet his gaze._

 _He had seen her cry before, over romantic movies and cute little puppies but never like this. She looked so vulnerable and anxious and he decided he didn't like that look on her now or maybe even ever. He could feel the pieces of his heart breaking with each tear coming down her cheeks._

 _He could feel her grip on his shirt tightening when she said his name, "Barry..." And he only want nothing but to let her know he's there and he's not going to leave her side any time soon._

 _"What is it? Cait, you're making me nervous." His fingers were skimming through her hair, gently tugging her face up to meet his._

 _"It's...Dad." She croaked as a fresh batch of tears came crashing down her pale cheeks._

 _With those two words, he already guessed what happened. He knew her father wasn't very much fond of him to the point where he doesn't seem to notice his presence every time Caitlin would try and introduce him._

 _It never became an issue between the two of them for they were both stubborn, or what Caitlin always preferred - strong-willed. The only moment that it does become a problem is when she and her father would have an argument about it. Barry knew that her father didn't have the luxury of spending time with his daughter as much as he wanted to that's why he refused to have them waste what little time they have arguing over him._

 _Feeling like he was trapped between two opposing sides, he thought of doing something that could somehow - even if it wasn't going to be a permanent fix to everything - ease his girlfriend's troubles._

 _He wiped away her tears quickly and planted a kiss on her forehead before saying,_

 _"Go downstairs and meet me at our spot in the garden. If you don't make it ten minutes after we part, that'll be my cue to run away. Got it?"_

 _Confusion washed over her features at his command, eyes questioning his when she asked, "Barry, what are you planning to do?"_

 _"You'll know later. But for now I need you to trust me. Can you do that, Cait?"_

 _She was a bit hesitant at first but knowing he wouldn't do anything that could put them in danger, she nodded her head slowly._

 _"Good. Now, I just need something -" He's already scanning her room before she can even comprehend what he just said. In an instant, he was holding up a small metal box, which she later recognized as the one which she stored some of her old coins, "-do you still need this babe?"_

 _Her mind was too preoccupied with what happened and what has been happening before her that she hadn't really thought about it when she gave another nod to his direction._

 _"Alright, we're all set. Remember Cait, no longer than ten minutes."_

 _"Barry-" Her word was met by a kiss and a fleeting smile when he turned around and made his way towards the balcony. Whatever it was that she was planning to say, has been replaced by the words, "Be careful."_

 _After knowing that he had made it down her balcony safely, she retreated back to her room but a single rose lying on the floor caught her eye. She slowly picked it up and it seemed like she didn't feel so sad and bothered anymore._

 _"Oh, Barry." She whispered to herself, a smile already forming on her lips as she took the time to appreciate his thoughtfulness._

 _She gathered herself up after that, mustering all the courage she had and prayed for a little bit of luck to be able to sneak out of their house undetected. It was her first time to do it for Barry's always been the one to do the dirty work. He's always been the one who would have to sacrifice, to travel the more difficult road in their relationship but now, it's time to return the favor._

 _Putting on her robe, she turned the doorknob and went to see Barry._

* * *

 _Caitlin silently walked into the garden, making sure not to step on dried twigs as she did so. She was nearing the tree as her eyes were frantically looking for Barry in the dark. She was starting to think that maybe she took so long and he already have left but the shuffling sound behind the tree quickly erased her doubts._

 _"Bar?" She whispered, making the noise stop._

 _Barry came out from behind the tree, flashing her his ever goofy smile. "Cait! You made it."_

 _"Shh, not so loud. What are you doing back there anyways?"_

 _"I'll tell you later. But first I'm gonna need your ring."_

 _She raised a brow at him, "What? Why?"_

 _"I thought you trust me." He smirked at her as he put his weight on the shovel he had beside him._

 _"I wouldn't be here if I don't right?"_

 _"Right. Now give me your hand."_

 _She rolled her eyes but did as she was told. Barry pretended to have a hard time pulling the ring out of her finger and she was already opting to slap him on the arm when she heard his impending teasing, "Baby, I love you that's why I'm gonna be honest...you've gone fat."_

 _"Hey!" She half screamed, half whispered as she gave his shoulder a playful smack._

 _He just chuckled and said, "Seriously, Cait. I can't remove it. What did you eat this evening?"_

 _She rolled her eyes and shook her head, "You're doing it on purpose, Allen. Don't you forget that I know you too well."_

 _"I don't know what you're talking about." He shrugged._

 _"You know what? Why don't you just let me do it myself?"_

 _She tugged her hand back gently but he tightened his grip and blurted out a, "No! I mean-uh, I don't want you to hurt yourself so I'm just gonna do the technique I learned from the internet."_

 _"Barry, I'm not going to hurt myself you goof. And did you just say technique? What-"_

 _"Shh, silence babe. Let the expert do his work."_

 _Her furrowed brows were met by his cheeky smile as he squatted down in front of her. She was about to ask what he was doing when he literally took her ring finger into his mouth._

 _Her eyes widened as she squealed a muffled, "Barry! What the hell are you doing?"_

 _He held up a hand towards her flustered face and took her finger further inside his mouth. Caitlin couldn't be more thankful for the way she stood blocking the garden's post light for she knew how red her cheeks were at that exact moment._

 _She held her breath as the rest of her stood frozen all because of her boyfriend's simple yet tantalizing way of - what was he doing exactly?_

 _A few seconds later and she had the answer to her question - he was taking her ring off her finger rather effectively._

 _He picked the ring from between his teeth and got up before facing her with a smug look on his face, "How's that for a creative and painless way of taking off your ring, Mrs. Allen?"_

 _"I-uhm, that's-you...you are very well aware that you've gone beyond the definition of cheesy, right?" She tried to play it cool and put a hand on her hip, cocking her head to one side._

 _"Then you should be happy about it, Cait."_

 _"And why is that?"_

 _"Because that only meant that I'm still hopelessly in love with you." He said, winking at her. "So if I stop being cheesy then that's when you need to get worried for I may have finally be freed of your spell."_

 _"Are you saying that I'm some kind of a voodoo master?" She asked, trying to sound offended._

 _He let out a sigh and put the shovel beside the tree before wrapping his arms around her waist to draw her close. "What I'm saying is that I'm only like this because of you, Caitlin Snow. Only you can bring out the sappy romantic in me."_

 _She was on the verge of melting at the intensity of his gaze and the seriousness of his tone. Although she would never admit it out loud, she admits that he has never look this sexy to her until now. She opened her mouth to speak but he's already whispering something in her ear._

 _"But I wouldn't change one bit for I know that's one of the many things you love about me." He pressed his body closer to hers as he continued, "You may not even admit it but don't forget that I know you very well, too."_

 _That was more than she can take so without sparing a beat, she had him backed up against the tree as she kissed him furiously. He didn't hesitate to kiss back with equal intensity and soon enough they were making out on the garden, hands roaming each other's body._

 _When they slowly broke the lip lock for air, Barry took both of her hands in his and gave her another chaste kiss before saying, "As much as I enjoy doing this with you, I'm afraid we have some more important things to do."_

 _"Yeah?" She asked breathlessly, their foreheads touching as they both still had their eyes closed._

 _"Yeah. Now, come on. I didn't waste my energy digging up this hole for nothing." He said as he held her hand and led him on the opposite side of the huge tree._

 _She stopped in her tracks at his words, "Wait, you did what?"_

 _"Baby, relax. It was just a small hole. Enough for us to bury this metal box."_

 _The confused expression on her face deepened as he opened the box and put their rings which were confined in a zip lock inside._

 _"I know you have a lot of questions so I'm gonna have to start explaining." She slowly nodded and he took that cue to continue. "Cait, I realized something when we got married at the booth earlier."_

 _"What is it?"_

 _"I...I know that I love you with all of me that's why I-I...wanted to be yours forever, Cait. We may be young and impulsive right now but I already know what I want and I'm pretty sure it won't change for the next ten or twenty or maybe even a thousand years."_

 _Tears were slowly forming in her eyes as he spoke and although she's pretty sure what he was trying to say, she still needed to hear him say it so she asked, "What are you trying to say Barry?"_

 _He held up the box in his hands and took a deep breath before replying, "I want to make a vow to you, Cait. And this box right here, with our promise rings inside, is what's going to symbolize it."_

 _"What are you going to do with it?"_

 _"I'm going to bury it here to make sure that you and I will always have a piece of ourselves together. And I was kind of thinking that maybe we could share our vows right now because we didn't have the chance to do that in the booth earlier."_

 _He looked so sheepish saying those words but to her, it's the most adorable sight ever. He was rubbing his nape, eyes glued to his feet and she knew he was putting his heart on the line once again._

 _And maybe once and for all._

 _She wanted to kiss all his doubts away, tell him he wasn't the only one who has decided, who was seeing himself in the future with her. Because she, too, has felt the way he did, has seen herself with him for the next ten or twenty and yes, even with the thousand years and more._

 _"Since you've already put my ring inside, I don't think I still have the choice to say no to do this or do I?" She said, smirking at him._

 _His gaze flew up to meet hers and she swore his face could've split up due to how wide his smile is stretching across. Without warning, he has enveloped her in a tight hug as he planted butterfly kisses all over her face._

 _"I promise you Cait, we will make this work. We will be together until that inevitable someday where you and me will be all wrinkly and wise but still as in love as we are right now."_

 _"Maybe even more."_

 _"Yeah, maybe even more." He echoed as he slowly leaned in and kissed her sweetly._

 _When they pulled away, she asked, "So how are we going to do this, Mr. Allen?"_

 _"Since it was my idea, I think I'm gonna have to start first."_

 _"I bet you had a speech written on a piece of paper resting somewhere in your pockets just waiting for this very moment." She teased._

 _"Hey, I swear to you this was all spontaneous." He countered._

 _"If you say so." She shrugged but urged him nonetheless, "Now, go on. I want to hear your unprepared speech."_

 _"Okay, here goes." He cleared his throat and took her hands in his and said, "Caitlin Snow, I've always felt connected to you ever since you saved me that one fateful day on the playground. You had become my ray of sunshine since then and I hope you won't get sick of me for I wanted you to be last glimmer of light I'd see until my last breath. You're the only person who managed to make me happy with just about everything that you do. You're the most beautiful woman to me, in more ways than you can even imagine and I'm one lucky bastard to have cherished such wonder close up. I love you and I'd gladly spend every day of my life just showing you how much. So please let me, for I wouldn't survive a life without you in it. I love you Cait, always in all ways."_

 _She was turning into a beautiful mess of tears before she knows it, the feeling of his fingers wiping her cheeks was the only thing that's keeping her grounded, telling her that what she just heard were real._

 _She pounded a fist on his chest before saying, "I hate you."_

 _"Wh-what? Cait, I-"_

 _"You said you didn't prepare that speech but you nailed it, you adorable idiot." She said, all the while fighting back the tears that didn't seem to care if she still looked like the most beautiful woman she had heard him say._

 _He chuckled at her words, "Well, I guess the sappy romantic in me has always been prepared."_

 _"Now how am I supposed to top that? Next time, tell your inner sap to be more considerate of others. Not everyone is a pro at sweet talk like you."_

 _He wiped away her remaining tears as he kissed her in apology. "I'll tell him next time, I promise."_

 _"You better." She buried her face on his neck, inhaling his familiar scent. She stayed that way for a few minutes until he was nudging the side of her head with his chin._

 _"Babe, I think it's time for your part of the bargain." He said but he got a muffled whine instead. He laughed at that before saying, "Come on, Caity. Don't leave me hanging here."_

 _She reluctantly pulled away just enough to look into his eyes, sighing at the eager expression he had. She kissed him once more, keeping their foreheads together as her eyes remained closed before saying, "I know I always tease you about being such a romantic sap but I'll have you know that it's one of the things I refuse to live without."_

 _His chuckle made her eyes open and she stared at his eyes again before continuing, "My life has always been set up - predictable - and I wouldn't deny that I'm pretty much okay with that but whenever I'm with you, diving into a whole new world of impulsivity and spontaneity, I can't find myself being happier any other way. You bring out the best in me and made me realize I can do things that even myself would've never thought I'm capable of doing. You'll always be that one unplanned thing in my life that I would never regret diving head first into because Barry Allen, you're the best thing that's ever happened to me and I want you to know that I love you. I have always loved you and I always will, don't you ever forget that okay?"_

 _Now it was his turn to cry, nodding at her question as he promised to himself that he wouldn't forget and he probably won't for he will be loving her too with all the upcoming days of his life._

 _He gave her a hard and long kiss before burying his face on her neck, tightening his grip on her waist just to make sure that this is all real. They wouldn't know what the future may bring but what matters is that they had promised to each other and for them, it's more than enough to not be threatened with what the next days, years, decades had in store for them._

 _"You're too emotional for a man, you know that right?" She asked as he tried to compose himself after his breakdown._

 _"And you're too rational for a woman." He quipped back which she just shrugged in reply._

 _He kissed her cheek before letting go of her as he proceeded to focus on the task at hand. He retrieved the shovel from the back of the tree and dug some more until they were both satisfied with the depth of the hole._

 _"So how long do you think until we're digging up these rings and we're actually having a real wedding that will hopefully cost more than five bucks?" She asked._

 _"And probably not inside a school gym."_

 _"Definitely."_

 _He stood back up, dusting off his hands as he contemplated before answering, "Well, we still have to finish our studies, which of course you'd take longer than I will then get a job and have a financially stable life before finally settling down."_

 _"That sounded simple enough to accomplish." She said, shooting him a hopeful smile._

 _He held her by the waist and said, "So I'd say...ten years? Give or take?"_

 _"It feels like a long time from now."_

 _"It's nothing to worry about, Cait. You know what they say, time flies when you're in love." He kissed her sweetly to prove his point._

 _"That may be true." She replied, initiating the kiss this time._

 _"I'll just have to win your father over and then we won't have to keep our relationship a secret and the next thing you know, you're a legitimate Mrs. Allen."_

 _He wasn't aware of it but every time he'd call her Mrs. Allen, a feeling of warmth washes over every bit of her being, making her smile go twice as wide and brighter. "Then we'll have mini versions of us calling us mommy and daddy."_

 _He reached for her hand and guided her to a nearby wooden swing, taking a seat before ushering her beside him. "How many kids would you like to have Cait?"_

 _"Two. Hopefully a boy and a girl."_

 _"Just two?" He teased, sending her a meaningful look. She just shoved his side playfully and he kissed her cheek in return and asked, "And what should we call them?"_

 _She had the look she always had when she was thinking, biting her lip before saying, "To be fair, I'd leave the boy's name to you but for a girl I want us to call her Ellie, short for Elizabeth."_

 _"I think it's beautiful." He smiled at her, squeezing her hand as he imagined her being a great mom someday._

 _"Well, I've always liked that name so I think it's one of the top choices I'd probably name my child. How about you?"_

 _"Hmm, considering I haven't been blessed with the best name, I guess I'd be okay with anything as long as it doesn't sound so old."_

 _She giggled at his little frown so she tried to cheer him up by saying, "Don't tell anyone but I kinda like the name Bartholomew."_

 _"Really? So you wouldn't mind naming our son before me?"_

 _"Like a junior?"_

 _"Yeah."_

 _"Ahm...I think that's for a totally different conversation." She said, messing with him._

 _"And I actually believed you liked my name." He pouted._

 _She just shook her head, a fond smile on her face as she drew his face closer to hers before kissing his still pouting lips. He immediately kissed back, making the kiss turn from sweet to passionate, igniting their innermost desires._

 _When they broke the kiss, she reluctantly said, "It's getting late. We should probably get some sleep."_

 _"Yeah...probably." He said, going for another kiss that's much more demanding, breaking free from all the restraints he's put himself into all those many tempting opportunities ago._

 _"Barry, you know we can't." She said, knowing what he was implying. They had been discreetly sending signals to each other as to when they would have their first time together and although they didn't come to a point where they had a verbal agreement about it, they both wanted for it to happen after their wedding at the booth. But since they hadn't anticipated her father to be at home this particular day, she said with a hint of disappointment in her voice, "Well, probably not at this time."_

 _"Yeah. It'll be totally inappropriate knowing that your dad is here..." He replied with darkened eyes, gaze still fixed on her swollen lips, making him subconsciously lick his own._

 _Caitlin was very much aware of his actions and it's consuming her despite trying her best effort not to be affected by it. But the more she fought it, the more she finds herself craving for his kiss, his touch, his everything._

 _"Who knows what he'll do if he catch us." She replied, playing with the small hairs at the back of his neck as she felt his grip on her waist tighten, leaving no space between their heated bodies._

 _He nipped at the skin on her exposed neck, trailing wet kisses to her ear and whispered so distractingly husky she literally held her breath, "He'll surely take you away from me and heaven knows I can't live with myself if that happens."_

 _"I won't be able to handle that too so we definitely shouldn't..." Her voice raspy, breathless as she tugged on his hair when he had marked her as his on the spot just below her ear._

 _"Definitely..."_

 _That was the last word he said until both of them were scrambling to their feet. She took the safe way from the backdoor while he made the deliberate attempt to climb back on the balcony for the second time undetected._

 _They were reunited a heartbeat later, both panting from the anxiety their recent successful escape has brought but more so for what's going to happen next. They both stood at the front of her bed, illuminated only by moonlight - eyes calculating, bodies anticipating, minds contemplating but hearts beating as one._

 _It's going to be their first - together and for themselves - and they're both on the verge of bursting with all the different emotions nipping at their insides - fear, excitement, nervousness, want and so on._

 _But one surpasses all the others and it's all the assurance they need to know that whatever happens they'll be okay._

 _Love._

 _It only took one glance, one caress, one kiss to make them forget about the world spinning outside their bubble of bliss. That moment, it's just the two of them wrapped up in a loving embrace, whispering words of adoration and promises of the future. All of their problems were forgotten as their bodies become one, hoping and praying that it'll always be like this - just them, Barry and Caitlin - until forever and after._

 _But little did he know that the future wasn't as simple as they foresee it to be._

 _And little did she know she'd be the one to forget._

* * *

After weeks of preparing for one of the most important events in his life, Barry couldn't help the nerves from eating him up from inside out. He's been pacing around the cortex for an unknown amount of time and he would've done it for the the next few hours if it weren't for Cisco's irritated groans.

"Dude, seriously! You've been walking around the office since this morning and I can somehow tolerate that but certainly not this time when I'm supposed to be enjoying my lunch." He grumbled underneath his breath as he took a big gulp of the slushie in his hands.

"I'm sorry. I'm just...what if she says no? I mean-" He stopped his pacing when he heard Cisco snap back at him.

"For the love of science, Barry! We've been through this topic like a hundred times now and I'm sure you already know how this ends. You love Caitlin, she loves you, you're gonna get married and of course I'd be the best man then you're gonna start making cute little babies who's gonna call me the coolest uncle ever. THE. END." Cisco huffed and went back to eating his unfinished sandwich.

"You really think so? What if she's not ready to settle down yet? What if she finds my proposal as moving too fast? I mean, for me it's like we've been together for a lifetime now but Caitlin has lost her memories and a lot of it includes me. I-"

"Don't tell me you're doubting her feelings for you because if I were you, I won't even try to go there. It's Caitlin we're talking about, dude. You of all people should know how much she's willing to give for the people she loves."

Cisco's words somehow managed to calm him a little bit. Of course he knew Caitlin, she even promised him her future, right? So that probably means she had already decided whom she'd want to spend the rest of her life with and he just hopes she wouldn't have anything to make her change her mind, hopefully not another accident for his sanity's sake.

He's about to say words of gratitude towards his best friend when Cisco abruptly stood up from his chair and with a mouthful of sandwich he exclaimed, "It's Caitlin!"

Barry just shook his head fondly, "I know. You kinda made yourself clear about that and I just want to thank you for talking some sense into me-"

"No, dude! It's Caitlin-she's here!" He swallowed his food quickly before pointing at the monitor in front of him.

Shock washed over Barry's face when he saw that she's already close to rounding up the corner that lead to the cortex. He immediately flipped the whiteboards that contains his plans, eyes scanning the room for any trace of spoilers that may sell out his surprise proposal.

He was still very much agitated when he heard Cisco's chirpy greeting, "Hey, Caitlin!"

"Hey, Cisco. I hope you don't mind the surprise visit." She said, hugging her best friend back.

Cisco scoffed and said, "Psh, you know you're always welcome here and don't worry, we're not surprised. It's not like I'm helping Barry with planning a surprise proposal or something like that. Far from it really-"

"Cisco! Just to remind you lunch is over ten minutes ago." He glared at him intensely, hoping he'd get the cue to shut up and help him hide his plans instead of blurting it out loud.

Cisco gave him a nervous smile and an apologizing look when he said, "Oh right. Sorry about that. I'm just gonna head to my workspace." He turned to Caitlin, "Good to see you again Caitlin and if you can please just forget that I said anything."

"Yeah, o-okay. See you around." She looked suspiciously at Cisco's retreating form before she returned his wave.

"Is Cisco okay?" She asked, eyes still glued to where Cisco had been. She then turned around and continued, "He's acting a bit more-"

She was a cut off by a demanding kiss on her lips, taking her by surprise but it wasn't long until she was responding to it. She broke the kiss first, placing her hands on either side of his face and said, "Is this how you greet visitors here at S.T.A.R. Labs?"

She had a cheeky smile on her face as she said those words and Barry couldn't help but reply with one of his own when he replied, "Nope. Only the special ones."

He tried going for another kiss but Caitlin held his face firmly and said, "We're inside the premises of your workplace, Barry."

"So? Last time we were in yours you showed me how much you value professionalism. I was just returning the favor."

She giggled at his words and said, "You know that's not what meant when I said that we have to be professional."

"Eh, actions speak louder than words, Dr. Snow." He said and went for another kiss which Caitlin didn't hesitate to reciprocate this time. He was reluctant to pull away but he knew that if they continued, he wouldn't be able to stop himself. Leaning his forehead on hers, he asked, "What brought you here anyways? It's not that I'm complaining, I was just surprised that you had free time since it's a weekday."

"I didn't. I actually had to cancel some meetings just to be here." She said, lips trapped between her teeth in anxiety.

Barry was surprised to hear her answer knowing how much she values her work, making it her number one priority since she took over. He started getting nervous, thinking that maybe something went wrong so he asked, "Is everything okay, Cait? Are you not feeling well? I can accompany you to the hospital if you want-"

"No, no, Barry. I'm fine. It's just that...you haven't been around much lately and I feel like you've been keeping your distance away from me. I know you said you've been working on something important but I can't help but be paranoid about it even if I know that I shouldn't. I guess what I'm trying to say is I..."

He visibly swallowed hard at her words. He knew he hasn't been spending much time with her this past few weeks and he's always stalling when she asks about what was it that he'd been spending so much time working on but he never thought it would all come down to this.

He held his breath as he waited for her to continue, sweat forming on his forehead in anxiety. He tried making eye contact but her gaze is at anything but him. He reached out to grab her hand, feeling it tense then relax under his touch. "Cait, you know you can tell me anything, right?"

"Yeah, I know. It's just that...I'm not usually the one to say this and I don't know if it's a good idea that I actually came here just to tell you that I..."

Is she saying what he thinks she's saying? Is she...breaking up with him?

 _Oh God, no._

He subconsciously tightened his grip on her hands as he waited for the dreadful words to come out of her mouth. His eyes fall shut, dissolving the world behind him as he readied himself for the worst.

But it never came.

"I...I miss you, Barry."

He dared open one eye, ever so carefully as to not shatter the calm that came with her words. He wouldn't believe what she just said if it wasn't for the way her eyes shone with sincerity.

"You-you..miss me?"

She bit her lower lip as she looked at him through her lashes and gave a tentative nod at his direction. "Yeah, I do."

"Oh thank God. For a minute there I thought that you-" He caught himself before he said something so absurd. He wanted so badly to laugh at himself in that moment for thinking that she's breaking up with him when actually, she's here to let him know just how much he means to her. "-well..."

"What?"

"Nothing." His smile his so wide he can feel his cheeks straining but he can't help but be reminded of how much of an amazing person she is, then and now. "It's nothing." He reassured her, taking her into his arms as he planted a sensual kiss on her lips, her cheek, her jaw and whispered something to her ear, "So, the ever workaholic Dr. Snow has taken her afternoon off just to drop her handsome boyfriend a surprise visit and tell him she misses him?"

The way her body shook in his arms as she laughed, brought warmth all over his being. He stared at her amused, not breaking eye contact as she rested her arms on his shoulders.

There's a mischievous twinkle in her eyes when she said, "I almost forgot there's always this insufferable part of the _handsome_ boyfriend that I certainly doesn't miss."

"Insufferable? What, my charm or my appeal? I'm confused."

That earned him her infamous eye roll, her smile's just like his is, full and content. He drew her closer and kissed her sweet and hopeful, knowing there's nothing for him to worry about.

"Hey, babe."

"Hmm?"

"How about we go on a trip this weekend? Just you and me."

She tilted her head to one side, eyeing him with a hint of suspicion, "Is this your way of making it up to me?"

"Uh-yeah? But if you're busy then-"

"If this is how you try to make it up to me then a weekend's not enough." She teased, making him want to kiss that cheeky smile away.

It was his turn to laugh, _oh if only she knows_.

"I'd make it up to you until forever if you'd let me."

"Sweet talk will get you nowhere, you know."

"I'm perfectly fine with that. I'm right where I wanted to be."

"And where is that?"

"Right here. With you."

She shakes her head.

But she kisses him anyway.

* * *

 **END OF PART TWENTY-FOUR**


	25. Chapter 25

"I can't believe I agreed to go on a trip with you, _for the second time_ , without knowing where we're actually going."

"And I'm glad you've been taking by heart the trust part of the equation for a successful relationship."

Her audible sigh rang through the small compartment of the car, earning a chuckle from her boyfriend which she rewarded with one of her death glares. She swore she saw his smile widen when she glared at him, arousing her suspicion that he had something up his sleeves for he would never have that reaction under normal circumstances.

She turned to face him again, opting to wipe the smirk off his face as she tried her best to put a warning tone on her voice when she said, "Barry."

His "Yes, baby?" was awfully sweet, clearly loving her rare display of impatience and annoyance toward the uncertainties this trip had brought.

"I'm not gonna ask for another clue but please just tell me that we're almost there."

"Sorry sweetie, but we're not even halfway through. A little more patience please?"

Her brow visibly twitched in irritation but before she could utter a word, Barry had reached for her hand, bringing it to his mouth as he kissed her knuckles. The effect of this little gesture was instant and before she knows it, all the irritation had already seeped out of her being.

She felt him give her hand a gentle squeeze before settling it on his lap as he maneuvered the car expertly with one hand. His eyes were fixed on the road, acting nonchalantly about his effect on her but the knowing smirk he had instantly gave him away.

She would've had a smirk of her own but she decided that a fond, genuine smile would be much more appropriate. Even if they had spent months of being together, she's still learning - experiencing it firsthand - what's it like to be his Cait.

She knew he's always been her rock, as she is to him but only today that she realized he's also her calm, like a safe haven amidst the storm. Up until now, she still finds herself surprised for just how much he knows about her - even the ones she didn't know herself - and she wished she knew him with the same depth he did her.

She wrapped her other arm around his as she drew closer to him, burying her face at the side of his neck. She inhaled his familiar scent, wondering out loud, "You always seem to be one step ahead of me."

He dropped a kiss to her forehead and asked, "What do you mean?"

"It's just...I feel like you have me all figured out."

"It's because I do, don't I?"

"Yeah, you do."

They let a comfortable silence sink between them before Barry spoke up again, "Hey, Cait?"

"Hmm?"

"I may have you all figured out but you never cease to surprise me, you know?"

"Really?"

"Yeah."

He smiled at her before returning his focus on the road. He tried to keep his excitement from showing for he knew she's up for one of the biggest surprises in her life.

But little did he know that the universe had something in store for him too.

* * *

Caitlin was woken up by the sound coming from the alarm on her phone. She reached for it, hoping she'll feel the familiar satin of her bedsheets but the dull throbbing of her back told her otherwise. Her mind was a bit fuzzy as she tried to recall where she was before she fell asleep. Taking in the limited space inside the car, she eventually realized she's on a trip to who-knows-where with Barry, who had been missing in action since she woke up.

She glanced at her phone screen and was a bit surprised to know that it's already seven in the evening. But the thing that confused her more is the label of the said alarm, something about going on the actual trip. She wondered where she was and why had her boyfriend left her alone in an unknown place. She made a mental note to give him a piece of her mind when she sees him - that's if she'll see him again.

She started feeling anxious, a barrage of negative thoughts running through her mind as she thought of any possible scenarios that led her here. She scanned the inside of the car to look for some clues then peeked outside but it's almost pitch black from beyond the window.

Something caught in her peripheral vision that somehow calmed her nerves - a card attached to a red string, almost luminous against the darkness surrounding her. She tried her best not to overstretch her already wrinkled red dress as she reached for the card hanging by the window of the driver's seat.

A few words embossed in gold letters where placed delicately on the simple white card. She ran her fingers over it a few times, the words already memorized in her mind.

 _ **Follow me and we'll go on a trip...**_

 _ **..A trip down memory lane.**_

It says, and Caitlin couldn't help the smile stretching across her face.

Barry Allen and his stupid surprises.

She moved to the other side of the car, careful not to tear her dress in her haste to open the door. As soon as she swung it open, her nostrils were met by the familiar scent of sea salt, followed by the gentle breeze caressing her skin.

Her suspicions were proven correct when she stepped out of the car and her heels were buried right below the surprisingly warm sand. Overwhelmed with the idea of having a relaxing weekend at the beach, she bent over to remove her heels and proceeded to walk barefooted.

She tugged at the string in her hand, hoping to see where it leads but the darkness made it hard for her to make out anything. She drew a deep breath as she relied upon the luminous string to guide her way through, the moonlight coming to her aid as she threaded towards the shore.

A few calming breaths and careful steps later, she found herself standing in front of a wooden pole. Seeing that the string was attached to it, she gave it a pull and soon enough, a paper lantern started glowing from atop the pole.

Caitlin was mesmerized by the sight, the soft light reflecting on the water made it look like she was surrounded by fireflies. She just stood there staring, admiring, until another card had caught her attention. It was like the first one but bigger and less words written on it.

 _ **My Sleeping Beauty...**_

She flipped it over, shock consuming her as she saw the photo attached to it. It was a picture of her, lying on a hospital bed looking pale and almost lifeless. She glanced below the image and found more scribbling that's undeniably Barry's handwriting.

 _'Of all the pictures I had of you, this is the only one that I personally took and I have to admit that I like this one the least. I know I shouldn't have taken it in the first place but I had to - a reminder of what I'd lost if I don't come back, of what's waiting for me the moment that I do.'_

She felt the tears threatening to spill from her eyes as she read those words. It's slowly becoming clear to her what this is all about - a trip down memory lane as he called it - and she finds herself swimming in a flood of emotions as she readies herself for what he had in store for her.

A quick glance to the direction of the string helped her visualize more of the journey ahead of her. With the aid of the yellow light coming from the lantern, she could somehow make out the faint trail of poles attached to the red string she had in her hand. She wondered how he managed to pull this off, without her even suspecting anything and with his deliberately busy schedule as of late-

Wait, was this the thing he'd been working on for the past few weeks?

 _Oh, how could she be so blind._

It all made sense now. All of her doubts, her questions, her absurd suspicions had been put to rest at the sight of what he had transformed the simple secluded beach into. She took in her surroundings well and even if she couldn't really picture it out in the darkness, she's pretty sure this is the same place where Henry's vacation house rests.

A smile of awe and appreciation made its way to her features as she thought of just how much Barry had invested in all these. She wanted nothing but to see him right now, tell him how much she appreciates him and show him just how much she loves him.

Her heart was already drowning with happiness but she made sure to leave some space for what she's about to feel for what lies ahead. She took one last look at the picture, soaking up the moments right before she woke up from the coma - her life before the lies, the Caitlin Snow before the storm.

She strolled to another pole, with equal parts excitement and anxiety weighing on her shoulders. She eagerly pulled the string as another lantern lit up, making the darkness back away a little further. She reached for the card hanging on it and it says,

 _ **My Comfort...**_

It's a picture of them - all drenched in the morning light - cuddled up in a small bed in what looked like a tiny room in a rundown apartment but the smiles they had on their faces made them look like they were living inside a mansion.

 _'If you're wondering why we look like a crazy mess in this picture, it's because we are. I would've chosen only all our happy pictures together to make you believe that we had the perfect love story but I won't do that. We had a fair share of ups and downs throughout this journey and I want you to cherish each one of them just like what you did before._

 _There was a time when your dad took you away from me when he knew of our relationship. Those months without you were agonizing and the pain wasn't kind enough to let me have a good night's sleep so when you surprisingly showed up at my doorstep one night, I felt like I had the best four hours of sleep in many months._

 _P.S. Yes, the badass in you had run away from home just to be with me. I can't really blame you for not being able to resist my charm, can I? ;)'_

Caitlin let out a shaky laugh at his words, despite her efforts of keeping the stray tears from escaping her eyes. If she was the girl she is right after the accident, never in a million years would she think of running away from home because of this so-called love. For one, she was forced to be with someone whom she thought was her husband and two, she had forgotten what her true love has made her feel - drunk in love and extraordinarily happy.

But what she experiences with Barry right now has managed to rekindle the fire in her heart - the heart of a teenage girl who's yet to be broken, who knew how to love without reservations, nothing but her entire body and soul.

She can feel herself calling out to her - the innocence that had been stripped away with lies and transgressions - wanting to become one again and fill the void of her being. At that very moment, she wanted nothing but to have her memories back, to feel that she hasn't lost anything.

To feel utterly and undeniably complete.

She runs to the next pole ahead, pulling excitedly at the string. She hopes against all hopes that she would remember the story behind the picture this time and not rely on what Barry has to say. She loves the way he tells her stories, as he always did whenever they come across something that reminds him of their moments together but now she wanted to feel the stories firsthand - to relive in those memories like she has not forgotten.

She's quick to find the card and as she read the words, she felt something familiar in forms of his teasing, of his inside jokes that she never really understood.

 _ **My Songstress...**_

She flipped it over and saw a photo taken from a karaoke bar with the two of them looking at each other while holding their individual microphones. She doesn't know why but she finds herself smiling at themselves.

 _'I bet even if you had your memories back, you still won't remember much of what happened that night. But it's probably for the best because the sound of your off-key singing isn't something you can easily get over with. Good thing I was pretty smitten with you back then because if I wasn't..._

 _But kidding aside, it's one of the most remarkable nights I had spend with you. Who knew that the uptight Caitlin Snow could be this carefree when she's adorably drunk?_

 _P.S. Summer lovin' had me a blast Summer lovin' happened so fast~_

 _Come on, Cait. You know the rest.'_

 _I met a boy cute as can be._ The small but distinct voice coming from that blurry part of her mind had rang through her core, teasing the memories from that night - how little she may remember from it - to come out to her consciousness.

She never realized she was the type to sing in public in a drunken state but the surge of nostalgia made her feel like there's more to Caitlin Snow than a workaholic, sometimes uptight business woman she is right now.

Watching as some tears fell on the picture, she held tight to that single line of lyrics that flashed across her mind. Playing it over and over as if to bring out the rest of the song and eventually the entirety of that night they shared at the bar.

She didn't get much but at least, it's a start.

Caitlin looked ahead, seeing that there's only two poles left, she tried her hardest to remember more. Sure, there had been glimpses of the past but they were fleeting, almost immediately when she tries and reaches out to them.

She feels like her mind was one big puzzle and these photos, these letters, these _feelings_ were like the missing pieces trying to come up with the whole picture - her whole being that has been forgotten for a very long time.

She eagerly pulled the string on the pole, making the surroundings brighter. The lights helped her to see clearly since her tears were now free flowing from her eyes. They were a mixture of happiness, of longing, of excitement, of everything in between that can only come from losing and finding oneself.

She takes the card, running her fingertips on the embossed letters a few times as if willing them to magically transfer something to her mind. It was faint but it was there - a memory of Barry running in a red skintight outfit.

 _ **My Personal Cheerleader...**_

Her hands were shaking as she looked at the picture - it's of them with Barry holding a trophy and her giving him a kiss on the cheek as they stood among the crowd of students. What striked her the most was the uniform he wore, the same red she had saw in her mind earlier.

She inwardly smiled, knowing she didn't just made the vision up out of desperation but it's clearly a memory. And the more she revelled in it, the more she feels them piling up, almost ready to surface but not quite.

 _'Third row right beside the stairs, remember? That's the only spot that mattered to me because I knew I'd find you there. You may not be aware of it but you've always kept me going. You've always been there, just to cheer me up even when you had exams the next day. You'd be there, shouting and chanting even when you never liked the crowd and the noise. You'd be there, just for me, and I didn't have to start running to feel victorious for I had won the only trophy that mattered - you.'_

 _P.S. What can I say? Only you can bring out the sap in me, remember?'_

There's a faint pounding in her head as his words replayed on her mind - _only you can bring out the sap in me_ \- knowing that it wasn't the first time she's heard of it. Once again, she tried to dig deeper, her want to remember him, the things that he loves to do, the way he wants to be taken care of drives her further.

She could feel they're just there, waiting to resurface but just like before, they never manage to get out. And it frustrates her to no end that she can't seem to get out of this back and forth routine.

She takes a breather for the last one, trying to hold back her tears as she composed herself. For the nth time, she's on a debate with herself whether to hug or hit her boyfriend for putting her into this rollercoaster ride of emotions but deep down, she knew it's one of the best rides she's ever been in.

This trip - as he called it - has managed to make her cry and laugh at the same time. She has never been this thankful for privacy for she knew if other people saw her, they would think she has lost her mind. She suppressed a laugh at that because she knew, at one point, she did.

For the last one, she decided she will not rush into it. Walking slowly, she took her time to let all the rewritten memories to sink in, one by one, even when most of them were not as clear as she hoped they will be.

She pulled the string carefully, letting her eyes wander around the shore as all of the lanterns had lit up the darkness. She took a moment to appreciate the sight, looking so utterly out of the movie scene that only professional sappy romantics like Barry Allen can pull off in real life.

She takes a mental note to give him something that will let him know how much she appreciates him. But then she realized there were no material things that could give justice to just how much she wanted him to feel. She could only think of one thing - her memories - but even she can't give it to herself.

She sighed as she almost accepted defeat, leaving it for the time to tell. She reached for the card hanging on the string, reading out loud the words,

 _ **My Hero...**_

She flipped it over and was surprised when she didn't find a picture or a letter. Instead, she found the key to regain her memories. Because what she found attached to the back of the card is a symbolism, a literal embodiment of a start, _their_ _beginning_ , the one that held that undeniable connection between them-

A popsicle wrapper.

 _The popsicle wrapper._

And then-

She remembers.

 _Everything_.

Her memories came faster than she had lost it. It feels like she can see everything and nothing at the same time. Her head throbbed together with each passing moment that had found a place in her mind again, events that had been a huge contribution to who she is now.

She suddenly feels nostalgic, relevant and most of all - complete. She soaked in the feeling of being hurt, being loved, being a teenager, being her father's daughter, being his Cait - of everything that made her, _her_.

She almost did the "happy dance" as what Barry had done a lot times before as she could remember. She's smiling and crying tears of joy like an idiot but for once she didn't care. Her laugh was a stark contrast to the silence of the beach and her excitement has been overflowing she almost felt like she's about to burst.

She took her time to let it all sink in, to let all the memories be stored to their rightful place in her mind before deciding to meet him. Seeking out where the string led, she made a run to the second floor balcony of the vacation house.

As soon as she had a glimpse of his silhouette, she slowly moved towards him. She was mesmerized by the decorations he set up in the balcony - complete with rose petals on the floor accompanied by candles randomly placed around the place and a beautiful table setting to the far side of the venue.

His back was to her and based on his telltales, she's pretty sure he's nervous about her reaction to all these. Smiling to herself, she fought the urge to jump into his arms and shower him her kisses of appreciation. She'd definitely do that alright but for now, she needs to make her presence known and what better way to do that is to call him the way only his Cait would know.

"Hey, slugger."

* * *

 **END OF PART TWENTY-FIVE**


	26. Chapter 26

"Hey, slugger."

Those two words echoed through his mind, to his whole being, sparking up the hope he thought he had accepted to be long gone. His existence has been accustomed to hearing that nickname coming only from two people – his dad and the significant other he had lost and had found through this whole journey of love and life.

He had been anxious since this day had started – from the two-hour drive to actually arriving at their destination – knowing it will be one of the special ones he'd keep in that treasured part of his mind if she would actually say yes to his proposal.

He had been keeping a keen eye on what's been happening down the shore, meticulously observing the way his plan had been successfully unfolding from where he stood at the second floor balcony. A fond smile kept on displaying on his face as he counted the lanterns being lit up one by one, trying to make out her expression from a distance but the darkness had somehow made it futile. So, he revels in the way her silhouette would dance at the bare sand instead.

His body immediately stiffened as he heard those words coming from her. It only meant that it's time for him to face the music and a little something else he couldn't actually put a finger on. A small voice at the back of his mind screamed for him to jump for joy but the other – the one he'd been listening to for quite some time now – told him to not keep his hopes up for he had tried and had failed, only being able to bring back just an ounce of more than two decades of memory loss.

He tentatively turned around when he felt the string being tugged from the other end. He purposefully put the end of the string wrapped around the metal box he had retrieved a few weeks ago so as to make sense with all these things he had set up. He took a deep breath, mustering up all the courage he had and faced her.

He just stood there unblinking, dumbfounded as he took in the sight before him – her windswept hair that always looked so soft to the touch, her stance as she stood there barefooted gave him a feeling so close to being domestic and her eyes, shining with unshed tears had been calling out to him in a way he's so very much used to before. He's aware of her effect on him but he couldn't help but feel that this one – it's different. There's the familiar butterflies, the hammering on his chest but there's also something else, something about her that-

It's _her_.

"Cait…"

That's the only word he managed to say before he felt her lips on every part of his face, his neck, spreading warmth throughout his body in a form of tingling sensations. He still stood frozen, too mesmerized to react, too surprised to believe it's actually her, all pieces of his Cait, crushing him in a loving embrace.

She buried her face on his neck, whispering something to his ear but all he could hear was just incessant buzzing, his mind has gone haywire with the unexpected (but certainly not unwelcomed) turn of events. It took the feeling of her retreating from the embrace for him to actually move, shoving her petite frame back in his arms rather roughly as he let his instincts kick in, the fear of losing her again taking control.

It took a while for him to loosen his grip on her but he knew he had to, there's still something important for him to accomplish for the night. He felt her fingers wiping his cheeks and that's when he realized he has been crying for awhile just like she was. He managed to crack a smile as he brought her lips to his in a bruising kiss, only breaking apart when the need for air was too necessary to deny.

There's so much that he wanted to say but his mind settled for, "But…how? Cait-"

"I can't exactly explain but…it just did. I remember everything." She pressed another kiss on his lips, lingering for a moment before she continued, "All I know is that it won't happen if it wasn't for you. Everything that you do has been piling up something inside me and this-" She gestured to their surroundings, one hand delicately placed over his wildly beating heart, "-has overwhelmed me beyond my mental restraints. You've always managed to conquer the impossible for me, Barry Allen."

He flashed her a smile before taking her in for another kiss, something he knew he would never ever get tired of doing. "Wow, just…wow. This wasn't even my intention in the first place but-this, I..I don't even know what to say, Cait. I'm just so, so happy that you're back."

"I am too." She searched for his eyes for further understanding and asked, "But wait, it's not? Then why did you go through all this trouble for?"

"This is anything but trouble for me, okay?" He sheepishly smiled, scratching the back of his neck as his other hand came to pull out the metal box from his pockets. "I believe you still have one more stop before the trip ends."

He held up the box in front of her, "I think it's time for you to hear the story behind the metal box that caused havoc in your garden, Dr. Snow."

Her laugh was as angelic as he remembered it to be, only this time, it's full and complete – not a single ounce of emptiness present in it. "All these just to tell me that? I'm sorry to break it to you Mr. Allen but your plan has failed for I clearly remember the story behind that metal box." Her facial expression turned stern when she said, "And I also remember that it was you who mercilessly dug up my garden so don't you accuse this innocent little box of your own crime."

He laughed and took her by the chin, kissing her until her frown melts away. "Alright, fine. I take all the blame." He pulled her close to him, settling the box between her hands and challenged her with his gaze, "Tell me Dr. Snow, what's the story behind this box? I need to make sure you had your memories intact and you're not just bluffing."

She looked at him straight in the eye and said, "It was the day when we got married at the booth in our school fair when we – _you_ – decided that we put our rings inside this box and bury it so that we'll always have a piece of ourselves together…" She trailed off, eyes closing as she reminisced the very words and promises they made to each other that day. "We…always thought it would be that simple. Just you and me, waiting for that inevitable someday that would seal our fate together forever."

He kissed her still closed eyes just to prevent the tears from falling, assuring her that they had made it through and will continue to make it through with each other by their side. "Well, we had never foreseen that the previous years would be like that but you know what? I don't care about it anymore because we're still together after all those years. And I'm pretty sure we'll still be together for the next ones because you and me had been through too much together to let each other down now, right Cait?"

"Right, you're definitely right."

"So, how about you open that box now to see what's inside?" He smiled cheekily at her bemused expression, knowing she already knows what was inside.

"I'm starting to think that my memory loss has been transferred to you because I'm pretty sure I said that I remember what's in this box earlier."

"Just open it. You know, for good measure."

She rolled her eyes at his eagerness, although there's something else in his eyes that she couldn't quite decipher. She slowly unwrapped the string from the box, clearly enjoying the way he would bounce off his heels in impatience. She could see he's itching to see something unfold before him and she had to suppress a laugh when she slowed her actions further on purpose.

It took a little effort to open the box since the clamp holding the box together had started to rust. She knew she would find their rings inside, placed inside a zip lock as she clearly remembered but when she didn't find any sign of the plastic, she let her fingers graze its inside until she felt something smooth hit her fingertips. It's a replica of the cards she's been finding earlier, white and crisp with gold letters embossed on it. She caressed the small letters printed on it before flipping it over and the words had her speechless-

 _ **Marry me?**_

The sound of the metal box clanging on the wooden floor was enough for her to get back on her senses, the card still clutched between her now shaking hands. She finally had the strength to remove her eyes from the card and search for Barry and she found him a few feet away from her, kneeling on one knee, a beautiful diamond encrusted ring resting on a velvet box lying on top of his fingers.

"Caitlin Eleanor Snow-"

"Yes! Yes! A million times yes!"

Caitlin practically tackled him on the ground and Barry had to support her frame with one hand as the other secured the ring to keep it from rolling off to the floor. He hadn't had the opportunity to regain his breath from her takedown when he felt her luscious lips on him, all sweet and demanding. He gripped her waist tightly, pressing her to him as he eagerly returned the kiss.

He pulled away long enough to reach for her left hand and put the ring on her finger. He watched as she studied the ring with a lot of emotions displaying in her eyes but he knew it had the same twinkle of happiness and love as he had in his. He drew her in for another kiss, feeling the stray tears falling from her eyes to his cheeks but he didn't mind. Instead, he found himself smiling at their warmth.

A few moments later, they had both sat up with Caitlin perched on top of his lap, all the while sharing kisses as they did so. With the knowledge that she must be dehydrated and exhausted from all the crying among other stuff she had been through this night alone, he carried her to the table where he had a special dinner for the both of them.

Dinner's composed of a bit of everything of their favourite dishes. Caitlin wondered how much time and effort he had invested just to make all of this happen but from she had always realized, Barry had been always the one to do the impossible for her.

And she probably wouldn't be surprised to know if he's some kind of a superhuman in another universe.

* * *

After they had dinner, which was mainly composed of them feeding each other in between kisses as Barry held Caitlin on top of his lap, they both decided to have a hot steamy shower together. Barry had been eager to rid of his three-piece suit and settle on the bubbly water as he waited for Caitlin who had taken so long to undress, teasing him.

Taking advantage of his position with his back to her, she gently covered his eyes with her hands as she slowly slipped into the tub behind him. She started massaging his back, feeling his muscles contract under her touch. He returned the gesture moments after but with the way his hands roamed around her body she knew he had other things in mind rather than just taking a bath.

Caitlin giggled at his eagerness, earning a frustrated groan from him and as much as she agrees with what he wanted to happen, she hopes for something more special - something that would leave him breathless in more ways than one.

Having formed a plan in her mind, she decided to prolong his waiting a bit longer and with a promise of "Later, baby," she had managed to let his excitement subside even for awhile.

They found themselves tucked underneath the warm sheets of the bed in a loving embrace, letting all the events of this day settle between the available places in their hearts and minds. There wasn't much but they made sure to keep the ones that really mattered, memories they'll bring with them as they get older, moments they'll share with their children in the near future.

"What's on your mind?" She asked when she noticed how awfully quiet he had been, a stark contrast to his playful nature earlier in the bathroom.

His hands has been playing with her hair, something he always loved to do whenever she laid her head on top of his chest, "Just…everything. The past few years had been…" he trailed off, trying to supply the word that would best describe the rollercoaster ride they had the past years.

"Eventful?" She continued for him.

"Yeah, eventful." He breathed.

She tried to find for the right word to say, the appropriate question to ask but her already tired mind had settled for a hesitant, "How are you holding up?"

His absurd laughter proved her suspicions that she had clearly made the wrong choice to settle on that less thought-of question but instead of being offended, she shrugged it off and asked, "What?"

"Nothing. It's just that you made it sound like I've lost someone dear to me." He noticed her frown at his own choice of words and he couldn't help but feel like they'd been exchanging with the most inappropriate words in this conversation alone compared to the million others they had before. He knew they'd always been great with words – well, mostly her – but certainly the recent events had taken a toll on them to actually have a proper conversation. "But just like what I've mentioned earlier, all I care about now is that you're still here with me and heaven knows I won't ever let you go again. Unless you're getting sick of me?"

She looked up at him to meet his questioning gaze, kissing him to melt his doubts away and said, "Of course not. And even if I am, which I know wouldn't be possible for the next millions of years, I'd still be by your side because that's where I belong."

"When did you get this sappy, Cait?" He teased, earning a laugh from her.

"I think I've been spending too much time with this guy and his cheesiness had been rubbing off on me without me knowing." She settled back on his chest again, tracing patterns on his bare skin.

"This guy must be pretty awesome for you to notice him, let alone spend _too much_ time with him."

"He is, alright. But he wasn't just awesome, he's charming too. Believe me, I could go on and on about him but I'm afraid my boyfriend wouldn't appreciate it. He gets jealous way too easily but don't tell him that."

"I think any man would be jealous if they hear their girl going on and on about someone who wasn't them. Who is that guy anyway?"

She propped herself up on her elbows as she rested them lightly on his chest, eyes searching for his under the soft light coming from the lampshade. "Well, that guy is the love of my life."

"Really?" He asked, tucking away a loose curl behind her ear.

"Really."

"Tell me more about him then. I want to know how much you remember him."

His eyes were intense as he challenges her but there's also a hint of uncertainty that she knew came from the overwhelming – almost unbelievable – feeling that she's actually there, all of her, breathing the same air as he does. She wouldn't dare blame him for that little bit display of doubt for she can't also believe it herself. Everything just happened so fast – in a snap of a finger – but it happened all the same.

She moved her hands from his shoulders to either side of his face, eyes full of strong emotions as she hovered her lips just above his. Knowing he believes in the saying that actions speak louder than words, she proceeded to wash away every inch of his doubts by doing just that.

"I'd rather show than tell."

Caitlin noticed the way he visibly swallowed at her words, a playful smirk dancing across her features. She bit her lower lip before looking down at his, teasing him as she opened her mouth only for her to put it dangerously close to his now slightly parted lips.

Barry reached up slowly to end the torture, wanting to taste her, hold her, have his way with her so badly but she held up a finger to his mouth, letting him know she's got plans on her own. He wanted so much to protest, having enough of her teasing but when she straddled him, stripping slowly in front of his very eyes, he suddenly felt his mouth dry up.

She did the undressing in a very tantalizingly slow pace, whether it had taken hours or so, he wouldn't have minded for he enjoyed every single second of it. It's been years since they had been reunited this way so if she wanted to take her time in this, he would've said he did too.

He watched as the last string of clothing has been removed from her body, taking his breath away but when he discovered that she's about to do the same to him, he almost fainted right there and then. He felt her fingertips grazing the edge of his sweatpants, removing every doubt in his mind rather effectively.

As soon as they both lay bare naked, Barry wanted nothing but to lay his hands on her and feel every inch of her porcelain skin. It almost physically hurt to just stare at her flawless beauty and not be able to touch her but the firm grip she had on his hands, pinned down on his sides, had prevented him from doing so.

He groaned in frustration and Caitlin was very much aware of his impatience but she's a woman with a mission so she had to dutifully stick to it like she always does.

"Patience, Mr. Allen. I'm not yet done with my part. In fact, I haven't even started yet."

It's only at times like this that Barry doesn't want to be Barry – the ever gentle, sweet, caring man that had been Cait's adorable romantic sap for almost all of his life. Whenever Caitlin had set his body on fire – filling his mind with overwhelming thoughts of what he wanted to do to her – he wanted to be that man who is anything but gentle. Be the one to set free the animal within him that he always had to keep on a leash most of the time.

He came back to reality with the sensation of her lips on his mouth, bruising and he smirked inwardly before he's returning the kiss with much passion as she does. They savoured each other's mouths, swallowing their moans of pleasure. He had to prevent himself from going after her when her lips left his to take a much needed breather. Then the twinkle in her eyes let him know of what she's trying to achieve in this torture of hers.

She started kissing her way down his neck, leaving subtle loves bites in its wake. She knew how much it drives him crazy especially when she sucked on the sensitive spot he had just below his ear. So she started paying attention to the surrounding skin, teasing him further before she actually left her mark in there-

 _I know you._

Then she proceeded to trail wet kisses down his chest to his abdomen and slowly to the faint line on the left side of his waist that she knew would never fail to elicit one hell of swearing from him. She knew it wasn't a good trait but she secretly loves it when he curses – the one sinful act that makes Barry Allen a thousand times sexier in her eyes than he already is.

 _I remember you._

And finally, her kisses brought her to that one forbidden place in his body that only she had the access to. It's one of the many secrets they shared – one she wouldn't willingly share to anyone. She searches his eyes in the dark, smirking when she saw him staring right back at her, breath ragged as his mouth hang open.

His gaze told her that he had been convinced way beyond he had asked of her but Caitlin Snow is not one to leave a task unfinished. She smiled devilishly at him, licking her lips before finishing what she had started and the sound he made will forever be retained in her mind.

 _I'll never ever forget you._

* * *

The next morning, Barry woke up feeling content and fulfilled than he was in years. His eyes were heavy, muscles sore in the most delicious of ways but he didn't mind. He just had the most amazing night in a long time and it wouldn't be possible if not for the woman sharing the bed with him. Speaking of which, he reached for her only to find out she wasn't there.

He abruptly sat up, rubbing the sleep off his eyes and glanced at the nightstand to check the time. It's still too early in the morning and based from what he remembered, he's been sleeping for just two hours now.

He scanned the whole room for any sign of her but he didn't find any. Fear gripping at his heartstrings at thought of losing her again but the slightly ajar door to the balcony had calmed him down a bit.

He rushed to the sliding door, almost forgetting to put on his boxers in his haste. He released a sigh of relief when he saw her form leaning on the railings in the balcony, smiling as she traced the outline of the ring he put on the night before. He set his weight against the doorframe as he admired her frame, clad in one of his button downs, hair moving gloriously with the wind.

He smiled at the sight, knowing she purposefully put on one of his clothing as she always did whenever they would share a night of intimacy. Before, it had only been because of convenience but when she learned how much he loves seeing her in his clothes, she made sure to always do so at any given chance. But as time passed by, it had grown to become a habit - one he certainly appreciates.

"I thought you knew that this look is for my eyes and my eyes only." He whispered in her ear as he wrapped his arms around her to do the remaining buttons of her shirt, covering most of her exposed skin.

She chuckled in response, leaning further into his embrace as she tried to ignore the chilly morning breeze. "Still as possessive as ever I see."

He pressed a kiss to the mark he placed on her neck hours ago, "What are you doing here anyway? It's chilly out here and I'm pretty sure you weren't dressed up for the cold. You barely even have clothes on-ow!"

She pinched his arm playfully, a teasing smile on her face that was gradually turning serious as she thought of the answer to his question. "I just...needed some air to let all the events of last night sink in."

"Should I be worried?" He asked tentatively.

She turned in his embrace to face him, pressing a reassuring kiss on his lips and said, "No, of course not. It's just overwhelming that everything seems to finally fall into place."

"Aren't you happy about it?"

"I am. I'm just hoping it'll all be permanent."

"It will be. But for now, why don't we just enjoy the moment?"

"Right." She smiled at him then returned her gaze back to the horizon to witness the impending sunrise.

Barry wondered why she had stood there staring at the sea while he was almost freezing to death in only his boxers. Good thing there's no people at their side of the beach to see their state of being undressed.

He nuzzled her neck and whispered, "Come back to bed."

"I'll just wait for the sunrise first."

"Cait, it's not happening anytime soon." He said and went back to showering her neck with kisses.

She nudged the side of his face, "Look over there, Bar. It's almost happening."

"But I want you now, babe."

She rolled her eyes at his pleading face and said, "Five more minutes. Just take some time to admire such beauty."

"I already am." He smirked, making her blush for she knew he wasn't referring to the sunrise.

She let out a shuddered breath and said, "Damn you, Barry Allen." She brought his face to hers in a searing kiss. "The things you make me want to do."

"What kind of things? Tell me."

"From what I remember last night, I thought you'd rather let me show than tell.

He grinned meaningfully at her words, feeling his heart soar for never in his wildest dreams did Caitlin Snow be more breathtakingly alluring when she teases him this way.

And hell yes, he'd rather have her show than tell.

* * *

"Oh no, no, no, no. I can't believe this." She shakes her head as she examined her reflection in the mirror, a frown forming on her features.

She heard the bathroom door opening, signaling that Barry has heard her whining, significantly concerned about this whole ordeal.

"Cait, what's wrong? Is everything alright?" He asked, scanning her form for any sign of trouble but he didn't find any except for the way her face was scrunched up in a adorable frown.

"I don't think I can go to the beach anymore." She sighed, sitting down in front of the vanity mirror as she combed her hair.

"What? Why not?" He asked, utterly confused about her sudden change of heart. She had been bugging him since this morning to go to the beach mainly because she wanted to take advantage of taking a leave from work so now he wonders why she refused to go when he's already prepared everything that they need.

"Because-" She exasperatedly put down the brush to the drawer, looking at him from their reflection on the mirror "-I can't go out in my swimsuit with these." She pointed a finger towards the red spots she had on her neck down to the rest of her body.

Barry almost doubled over at the sight of his fiancé's sulking face, rubbing the hickeys he had given her in hopes of making them disappear.

"I don't know why you think this is funny. For your information, you have some too so we can't probably go out to the beach together."

He tried to control his laughter and replied, "Baby, there's nothing to worry about. Besides, it looks adorable on you."

"It's not! And it's certainly not appropriate to publicly display the things we do in our private time."

"Just think of it as a way of making people know you're mine." He took her hands and pulled her up to face him, looking at her intensely and said, "And I am yours."

"I thought this engagement ring has already served that purpose?"

"Well, it wouldn't hurt to be sure, right? And speaking of which, I have been dying to do something since I planned on proposing to you."

"What?"

"I'd rather let you know when it's done." He smiled cheekily at her, dropping a quick kiss to her lips before dashing out of the bathroom.

Caitlin knew of that look too damn well and she wouldn't be surprised to know if he does something cheesy. With her curiosity taking over, she followed him out the bathroom only to find him on the sofa tapping away at her phone.

She rolled her eyes at the mischievous twinkle in his emerald orbs before setting herself down beside him.

"Need some help?" She asked when she saw he hasn't typed anything yet at the space provided for his name.

"Nope, I got this covered." He quickly typed something in her phone and held up the screen in front of her, "See?"

She smiled fondly at his antics, kissing him in appreciation and said, "You and your thing for pet names."

"Woah, woah, wait!" He held her by the shoulders, narrowing his eyes at her and suspiciously asked, "No 'You're so dead for this, Barry Allen' or...'I value professionalism in my phone, Mr. Allen?'"

She giggled at his puzzled face, pinching his cheeks lightly and said, "That was before I decided to say yes to marrying you. Now that I'll be stuck with you for the rest of my life, I might as well be used to it."

His smile mirrored her own, blinding and sweet. "So Dr. Snow, do you take Mr. Allen - sappiness and all - to be your lawfully wedded husband?"

"I do-" She kissed him long and hard, "-sappiness and all."

Then Caitlin took his phone, probably changing her ID as he did hers. Barry just smiled at her and grabbed her from the couch and made a run to the door and eventually to the beach, ignoring her screams of protest.

As their names has been changed from _**Your Barry**_ to _**Your Future Hubby**_ and _**Your Caitlin**_ to _**Your Future Wifey**_ , it's just a matter of time until their inevitable someday where there would be no need for the word _future_ anymore.

The faint sound of wedding bells can already be heard from afar.

 _And you are cordially invited_.

* * *

 **END OF PART TWENTY-SIX**


	27. Chapter 27

"Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today..."

Everything fades into silence as she looks up at him. A genuine, loving smile slowly forming on her angelic features as she took in the man before her. He's everything a woman could ask for and more - gentle, sweet, caring, faithful, thoughtful and if she's being genetically objective, he's handsome too especially when he looks at you with those killer emerald orbs of his.

She closes her eyes for a minute, reminiscing everything she's been through with this man right in front of her. She could clearly remember their first meeting like it was yesterday and the wonderful journey they had travelled together after that. From the innocent kids they once were, to the hopeful teenagers they were at some point and finally to the young resilient adults they were now, she can't help but feel equal parts proud and lucky that they had made it through.

Their journey had been _eventful_ , almost a played out script out of a soap opera but she knew they wouldn't have it any other way. The past years had thought them a lot - things which they would pass on to their children and the foundation of becoming the wise old people they'll grow up to be.

A few tears rolled down her face as a string of memories flow through her consciousness like a stream of running water. She went through their first encounter, their fateful meeting, their first fight that lead to their confession to each other, their first kiss, their first time, their first anniversary and the second one, their first duet, their painful separation, their bittersweet reunion and their journey back to each other's arms again - all of these has been leading them to this day, _their inevitable someday_ that never felt so real as it is now.

Her eyes fluttered open due to the sensation of his gentle fingertips wiping her tears away. She let out a shaky laugh when she heard him say, "Cait, we haven't even reached the dramatic part yet and you're already crying."

She tried to look up in hopes of controlling her tears but she miserably failed. "It's just...I..."

"Oh no, please don't tell me you're planning on being a runaway bride again because last time I checked you were capable of doing that since-ow!" He felt her rub the skin she just pinched, scolding and comforting him at the same time.

"Of course not, silly. I'm marrying the love of my life so there's no way I'm running away from this." She managed to give him a beaming smile through her tears, a sight that took his breath away.

He almost cried at her sincerity but he needed to address the cause of the awful tears coming from her eyes, "Then why the tears? You know I hate seeing you cry, baby."

"I know, it's just that I can't believe we're actually here. After all we've been through..."

"Hey, I know I look like a handsome prince out of a fairytale in your eyes now but you have to believe that this is all true, Cait. We made it, you and me. Just like what we promised to each other a long time ago."

She stifled a laugh, nodding in agreement as she said, "You're right."

"About looking like a prince charming or-"

"You know what I'm talking about." She flashed him her signature smile and said, "I love you, Mr. Allen."

He replied with one of his own mesmerizing smiles before saying, "I love you too, Dr. Snow." He paused to gaze at her eyes lovingly before continuing, "Wow, I'm gonna miss calling you that but I guess I'd like it better calling you Dr. Allen."

Her laugh made him fall in love with her all over again and he wanted nothing but to kiss her right there and then so he did. As soon as his face started inching closer to hers, they heard the minister clearing his throat, eliciting a chorused "Sorry!" from the two of them as an amused laughter echoed from their audience of close family and friends.

As the ceremony proceeded with the exchanging of their vows that very much sounded like it did before, ending with one of the longest sweet kisses they shared, the couple had happily closed that chapter of their lives - only to start fresh with the new one.

The day of their wedding has been planned to be held exactly ten years after they had made their vows and buried their rings together as a sign of their promise to each other to prove that their love managed to conquer all.

And despite everything that has come their way - the pain of losing, the agony of forgetting and the danger of putting their heart on the line - Barry Allen and Caitlin Snow had managed to surpass the impossible together. Living and staying with each other every single day with their minds set for a future together where it'll be just the two of them bonded through an undeniable connection of love stronger than the obstacles of time and life.

And knowing where their hearts lay together - forever and always - as it is bound to be.

 _Inevitably_.

* * *

 **END**


	28. Chapter 28

_**Author's Note**_

Hi,

I know I'm not one to leave notes in my writings but it doesn't mean that I don't appreciate your reviews or I don't take your constructive criticisms or even be unapologetic for always putting you guys on edge due to my awful cliffhangers and habit of updating irregularly. In fact, I actually do.

When I started putting the bizarre imaginations of my mind into words and eventually stories, I made a promise to finish each one of them even if I wasn't sure that someone would take the time to read it or even be invested in it. So when I published the first ever chapter of my first ever fanfiction and got positive reviews, I was delighted.

I know I've mentioned a couple of times before that this fic is originally intended to end at the second chapter but being the wonderful readers that you are has inspired me to write more. It's actually a bittersweet feeling to end this but a happy ending has long been overdue, don't you think? But nevertheless, I enjoyed the journey of writing this story and I couldn't thank you enough for the company.

I just want to express my outmost gratitude to those who had favorited, followed and especially those who took their time to review: Lina, Fanfan81224, jdcocoagirl, Leanish203, lost'n'whatnot, Snowflash, caitlinmontgomery, SnowbarryFamily, Travelerdreams, rangeles13, theeuniverse, snackthatsmilebackk, Ezrian123, Ranger McAleer, Davies96, Olicityville, Daniel6, Flash Frost, Guests and to those many others that made my heart swell nonetheless, thank you!

Also, I'd like to mention some of the people whose words and dedication to this story had managed to

To DestianaCaldin,

I just want to say that I'm a fan of your work so having to hear words of appreciation from you is really a big thing for me. Thank you!

To Raquel,

You've been one of those who had been exceptionally patient with this fic and I can't thank you enough for taking your time to read this.

To AReiss215,

This fic has took too long to finish and I just want to thank you for being a reader since chapter one. Thank you for your kind words.

To ShanouNash,

I have to be honest, I always look forward to your review because you've always been devoted to this fic and I want to tell you how much I appreciate your effort in writing one because it's always been the longest every time I put up a chapter. You don't know just how much you contributed in the completion of this story. Thank you!

It's been overwhelming that there are people who would appreciate the things that are usually just a fleeting thought inside my head so once again, THANK YOU. I'd be on a break for awhile but I'll make sure to complete all my unfinished stories and unwritten requests. I may also write a couple of bonus chapters for this but until then, goodbye for now.

Thank you!

-A


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